


A leap of faith

by TinyStarShadow



Series: Afterall [1]
Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-11
Updated: 2017-10-23
Packaged: 2018-11-13 00:17:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 27
Words: 104,497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11173032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TinyStarShadow/pseuds/TinyStarShadow
Summary: Six years after the defeat of Naraku, Sesshoumaru has a girl thrown at him. What starts off as a something entertaining to watch as she bumbles around the fuedal era unprepared turns into much more. She touches something she's not supposed to and turns into a valuable asset for the Western Lands. She's his complete opposite and may very well drive him crazy. She is unwilling to become the role she is meant to be and she seems to have some secrets to herself. The future is untold and ever changing.My first fanfic, still writing it and will have frequent updates. After the final act is where it's set.





	1. Let's fly

CHAOTER 1: let's fly

 

Summer breeze whispered through the leaves radiating calmness through the treetops, high above civilization on the mountaintop. Beautiful azure sky peered down onto the plateau and empty riverbed below. The perfect summer day.

The sound of bare feet slapping against the flat rocks in a full run pierced the air. Reaching the ledge she jumped with every bit of strength she had, twisting to peer upward toward the heavens, arms open. Smiling as she fell, wind rushing past her ears, drowning out all other sounds. She felt free, felt alive.

 

..........

 

Lord Sesshoumaru stood waiting along the tree line as Rin swam around in circles teasing Jaken. It was a pleasant day for leisurely activities outside of the castle walls.

The Lands had been quiet, making him grow bored. Nothing grand had happened since the defeat of Naraku six years earlier and he was feeling the itch for challenge.

"Jaken. Take Rin back to the castle when you are finished here." Disappearing out of sight, leaving them knowing they weren't far from the castle.

"oh yes my Lord! Of course!" Squawking toward the demon lord in the usual irritating pitch. 

"Bye Lord Sesshoumaru!" Rin called after him, watching him walk into the wooded forest. He would always hear her voice.  
Leaping up he took to the skies over the rushing river. Flying always seemed to help calm the call of challenge to him. Today was proving to be just another boring day full of nothing. Hoping he could spot a large game to hunt or a lesser demon to dispose of. Anything to sink his claws into might prove to be interesting at this point. Lost in thought flying for at least an hour.

From above came crashing down into him a woman. Out of instinct he caught her after they collided in the air. Looking up to see where she came from, perhaps the ledge high up above. Immediately realizing if she hadn't assaulted him, she would have surely fallen to her death into the violent rapids below.

He peered down with his golden eyes and waited for her to open hers. She opened one, looked around confused, then other. Deep ocean blue eyes, heavy with questions.

"Are you an angel?" Resisting the urge to snort. Of all things. 

"No." Looking over his face, magenta stripes on his cheeks and a blue crescent moon on his forehead. Silvery white hair billowing in the wind. Flying. 

"Are you sure? Cause I'm pretty sure you fit the bill here." Raising one eye brow in disbelief of his denial.

"Yes." Rather snarky for a human falling to her death. Scenting no fear from her which in itself was a puzzle. Sesshoumaru always did enjoy a good puzzle. He began their decent to a nearby clearing.

"Well, okay then. If you don't mind me asking, what are you then?"

He simply replied "an Inu-Youkai." As if she was supposed to know what that meant. Setting her down on her own feet. He couldn't help but think day may prove to be more interesting than thought.

"Um, how was there a river there? There wasn't one before. I looked." She knew there something was wrong right away, other than the obvious.

"There is and has always been one." Staring at her with his usual bored look as she smoothed her odd clothing out and fingered her sandy blonde hair. She huffed out of frustration towards him.

"No there wasn't. So either I'm insane or I did a time jump thing or a demension jump thing. Nothing else would really make sense how a river can appear out of nowhere. Being it was an empty river bed just moments earlier." Holy hell where was she and was she really considering those options? Too much doctor who binges. She fingered the small holes clearly left from his claws gripping her thighs as they collided. He had claws, not nails but actual claws.

"Little human. Are you ill?" He moved closer as his staring intensified, looking her over like a foreign specimen.

"Well maybe. I'm not really sure. I was in the year 2017 in Japan one second with an empty riverbed and now I'm here with a flying man. So you tell me." She nearly yelled empty at him as if it was his fault she felt insane while trying to cover the bases so he could help figure out what happened.

"It appears, little human, you have traveled through time. I've seen this before" He would have been surprised if it hadn't already happened with his half brothers mate. Do they not know how to keep their women in that time? Foolish humans.

"Hm. Okay then." She whirled around looking over her surrounding and picked a direction and started to wander off. Didn't particularly care where, had nowhere to be and was directionally challenged anyway.

"Where are you going?" Sesshoumaru was, however, surprised when she just started to walk off. She really was a different kind of woman, an oddity.

"I am not really sure. Just wander around I suppose. I don't have anywhere else to be." She stated it as if it was just the most natural thing in the world to be thrown out of time with flying men, scratch that, Inu-Youkai.

"Hn." Giving his standard answer when he had nothing more to say. If she wanted to wander off with no weapons or anything else for that matter, that was her choice.

"Well, um, thanks and all. See you around." Entirely too cheery for her situation. Bounding off towards the west into the trees with a half hearted wave.


	2. The Kami are laughing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wandering around and getting hungry. Sesshoumaru can't help but watch the clumsy woman fight against nature itself. Like watching a baby deer stumble around in mud.

CHAPTER 2: the Kami are laughing

.....

 

Stumbling around the over grown roots of large trees coming to sit down against one of them. She was worn out. Walking around until it was finally dark she figured she would try to sleep, growing miserable each moment she spent there.

After unsuccessfully trying to find some sort of berry to eat, sleeping seemed like the best thing to do at that point. Pulling her legs into her over sized hoody, she popped the hood up and curled into a ball with the tree at her back.   
Making sure to tuck her bare feet in. 

She figured tomorrow would be a better day to try to find some food with fresh eyes, maybe look for a village or anyone at all. As she fell into a deep sleep she had no idea she was being watched from the man she first deemed an angel. 

....

After watching her bound around aimlessly in large circles throughout the day, he couldn't help but feel pulled to watch her as she slept. He found it entertaining to watch her struggle against the natural elements and curse them just for being there. She was mildly interesting, not that he would admit to such. Thinking he must be a new level of bored if watching a human was any sort of interest to him.

Watching her ball up and fall into a deep sleep he wondered what she would do next. Would she starve or be eaten by a wild animal? Either would prove to be just as entertaining. 

Morning light filtered through the trees as the woman awoke. Feeling like crap, needing water and a good meal. Maybe a hot bath too. Oh how a bath sounded heavenly. 

She stood and awkwardly lumbered over the tree roots heading towards the west again or at least she thought it was, she had no earthly idea just guessed based on the sun rising in the east. 

Coming to a small pond she reached down and gulped up a few handfuls of water praying it wasn't too dirty. The last thing she needed was to have diarrhea on top of everything. Her luck she would and end up wiping with poison ivy or something and have a nice case of fiery asshole. 

She groaned at the thought, jumped atop a rock peering into the water. Maybe she could catch a fish for food. Sharpening a stick using the rock she was standing on and stuck it in the water waiting for one to swim by. She was failing miserably. She really needed a fishing rod and bait, that she could work with. 

Finally after around three hours she stuck one in the belly and pulled it out, quickly losing her balance and falling face first into the water, losing her lunch to the depths. She could have sworn she heard a faint chuckle but was probably just her imagination deciding to mock her too.

Finally giving up and soaking wet, she peeled off her hoody wearing a plain black tank top, removing something from the pocket. Laying it on a rock in the sun after ringing it out as well as she could. 

"I give up. I swear I give up." In the most dramatic way she possibly could, she reached up and grabbed a handful of leaves off the tree, starting to eat them. The Kami were laughing at her she was sure of it. Might as well get something in her belly and move on. 

.... 

Watching this helpless woman try to fish was indeed amusing. She obviously had never speared a fish and was completely clumsy in her attempts lacking any skill whatsoever.

Sesshoumaru allowed himself to enjoy watching her. He never could allow himself such emotions back at the castle, keeping strictly his facade of indifference. Allowing no weakness to be shown. Here he could, nobody was around and he could be more at ease. The western lands could afford his absence for a few days. Besides, he was scent marking the land itself with his wandering. 

As she got excited and pulled the fish out of the water he thought Maybe she wasn't so helpless after all. Then she promptly plummeted into the water. He lost all bearing and chuckled. It was surely a sight to have seen. 

When she started shoving leaves into her mouth like a common animal claiming she had given up he was sure she was putting on a show just for him. 

.......

Hours of wandering around like a complete idiot was starting to take its toll. Her stomach hurt from downing leaves faster than air. She regretted all her choices. 

Deciding she was done for the day, to try and start a fire. At least help with the remaining dampness in her clothes. 

"Come on you stupid fire! Just... GAH! Fucking son of a bitch!" She was frustrated beyond belief. Being out in nature wasn't anything new to her, having been in the peace corps for the past two years, spending the night in odd places. Just it is a lot easier with the right tools. Like a lighter. 

She kept at it, using one stick with her hoodie string wrapped around the other digging into dead leaves running faster and faster. Finally the smoke turned to a small delicate fire. After slowly getting it up and running cautiously she jumped up. Enthusiastically yelling to the skies 

"Hell yeah. Look at me oh mighty one. I made FIRE." All while dancing around wiggling her butt in a triumphant dance. 

Finally plopping down on a nearby log, she heard rustling behind her. Turning to see a large ogre looking guy. Green, stinking badly and ugly as sin. This guy hit every single stick on the way out of the ugly tree. 

"Oh I found a delicious meal tonight! Human is my favorite." She all but gagged when his breath floated by her.

"Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you. I'm not human. I'd be very poisonous to you if you ate me." She said it without a care in the world. As if she couldn't care less he just mentioned eating her. 

"You smell as a human girl. Lies will not get you out of this." Thinking about just letting him eat her so she wouldn't have to deal with smelling that smell anymore.

She sighed heavily. "It figures doesn't it. I became trapped in your world recently and humans tore off my wings. I would stink like them. I'm actually a fairy with most my power tied to my beautiful wings. They too tried to eat me," she showed a small gash she had on her calf from wandering through the woods earlier that day "they didn't believe me either and promptly died." Her words were over dramatic and hand gestures to match. 

The ogre eyed her more closely. Finally she held out her arm "take a bite and see for yourself. I don't mind. You'll be the one who dies." Shrugging her shoulders and staring back at the fire. Never having left the log she was sitting on. 

The ogre scented no fear from her and assumed she must be telling the truth. "I could always just kill you for fun." 

"You could. I could always tell you where a human village is, if you just let me be." She didn't even know where she was, least of all a village. But he didn't need to know that.

"It's a deal." She pointed to her left and simply stated "a days walk straight that way." Knowing she was going the complete opposite way came morning. He began to lumber off mumbling about finding a deer to eat instead. 

"You could bring me back some if you get one!" She hollered after him as he disappeared into the night. Completely ignoring her.

"Stupid ogres. Won't even share." More disgruntled about food than almost being food herself. She resigned herself to curl up and sleep by the fire. Stomach gurgling in protest from lack of attention, mood depleting just as quickly.

.....

 

Sesshoumaru watched in near awe as this woman out smarted an ogre. More so for her imaginative story and guts to outright lie than to out wit him. Ogres weren't known for their wits. 

Nearly snorting when she offered her arm out for a taste. Either she was full of courage or stupidity, he wasn't sure which. 

As he watched she lie down to sleep he couldn't help but notice her delicate features. The sweet curve of her jawline, the innocence locked in her face. He wondered how such an innocent looking woman came to falling off a cliff side. Did someone push her or did she jump and why? 

She was becoming more of a puzzle as he watched her. It had started more of an entertainment to him much like watching a baby deer stumble around getting stuck in mud and now more of a curiosity about her, herself. 

Chasing after the ogre, he would kill him swiftly while enjoying the feel of flesh in his claws. After all, he was keeping his lands safe and ogres had a knack for causing trouble


	3. Oh holy hell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's touch glowing things in the middle of the night.

CHAPTER 3: oh holy hell

She awoke to someone calling her name. At first it was just a whisper on the wind. Sitting up to look around, unsure if she heard anything at all.

"Kaiya....Kaiya...." Undoubtably startled, not a single person knew her here. She never even gave her name to that flying man, youkai. She'd remember that one day. 

Standing, beginning to walk closer to where the sound was coming from. The closer she got to a small den, the louder it grew. She stooped inside and crawled over to a shining dark purple light. Realizing it was the light calling her. 

It was beautiful and dark. About the size of a bowling ball and looked to be made of delicate glass filled with an unearthly energy light. Swirls of dark purple and black liquid like smoke.

Most people at this point would have probably fled and got the hell out of there but of course, not her. What'd she do? She touched it, of all her options, she fucking touched it. Grabbing it with both hands and lifting it off the floor of the den searing pain shot through her arms. 

Letting out a pitiful whimper as lightning streaks of dark purple trailed up and embedded themselves into her arms. Starting on the inside of her fingertips, up her hands and wrists twisting up her forearms as they reached her elbows. They glowed as brightly as the orb did. Her eyes turned pitch black across the whites and bright glowing violet at the iris. 

She saw nothing around her anymore, kneeling in a hot dark place. Glowing by pools of magma. Large creatures walking past her looking to her like pterodactyls in deep crimson red. She saw them break through the earth above and start to light everything on fire. All they had to do was touch it to set anything ablaze. So much destruction, death.

Letting go, pain immediately stopping. The orb was now a clear glass ball with an ever so slight lavender tint. She didn't care to touch it again and began to crawl away, feeling it hit her feet. Every time she tried to leave the orb, it rolled to her. This was a problem. 

"Oh holy hell." She yanked off her hoody then her tank top. She tied the bottom of it in a knot and scooped up the orb, careful not to touch it. Using the sleeves as handles. She turned to grab her hoodie and stomp off when she smacked into sesshoumaru. 

 

......

When he returned from washing the Ogre blood off his claws he noticed she was missing. He listened and quickly sent to follow her, she wasn't exactly stealthy so it was easy to do. 

He watched as she crawled into the den and picked up the glowing orb. He was fairly certain touching glowing things sealed that she was more stupid than anything. How she survived to be full grown was beyond him at this point. 

She let out a whimper and that brought him out of his musings. He watches as the lightning shot up her arms, having seen that marking before. In a small painting of an ancient book when he was a young boy. This was a very amusing turn of events. 

.....

 

"Hi again. We seem to keep running into each other." She chuckled at her own joke. 

His face never faltered. Staring at her with the same bored expression as he had the first time they met. It was fine, she knew she was funny.

"You will come with me." It was a command not a request. There was no room for arguments with his authority. 

She opened her mouth to tell him to shove off but quickly closed it. Extremely hungry, maybe she would at least get a meal out of it. She could always leave anyway. "Only if you feed me first." With the biggest shit eating grin she could manage. 

He wanted to smack that grin off her face for having dared to give him conditions, he would have fed her anyway, he needed her alive. Might as well let her think she had some sort of control, making her more compliant later on.

"Hn." He grabbed her arm and shoved her a bit in front of him. She walked forward clumsily trying to put her hoodie back on so she was no longer in just a bra. Not that she really cared, he didn't seem to so why should she? It's just boobs anyway. 

He watched her struggle to walk and hold the makeshift bag while putting the strange top back on. Stumbling around and at one point getting her head stuck in the arm and pulling it back off with a huff. 

Stopping he watched her make a fool of herself. She finally just stopped as well, dropped the damn orb and put it on. When she looked back at him, she swore she saw a smug look in those golden eyes. He's kind of an asshole, isn't he?


	4. The Orb of Souls

APTER 4: Orb of Souls

 

They continued walking until they were back at her fire which was nearly dead by now. Building her fire back up as she stared intensely at him, trying to figure him out. She knew nothing about him and he was well, quiet. Kai wondered if it was a youkai thing or just a him thing. 

"I will hunt for something to eat." Small smirk growing on his face as an idea formed. He would transform into his natural state and finally put the scent of fear on this little human. He almost even chuckled at the thought. 

"Okay then. I'll be here." Unknowing of his plan to amuse himself. Anxious for some food, so much hungry.

Sesshoumaru stepped back and transformed into his extremely large dog form. His red glowing eyes staring her down.

"Kami almighty! You're so fluffy!" her face lit up with pure joy at the sight of him as she ran over, latching onto his front leg to get a fluffy hug.

This is not at all what he had in mind. He was the great daiyoukai of the west, not fluffy. Growling in annoyance.

"You're absolutely the cutest thing I've ever seen!" As she continued to attack him. He was beyond done with this. Sesshoumaru picked up his massive leg and shook it the best he could dislodging the infuriating woman. As she plopped down on her feet, not satisfied so he smacked her with his tail. She fell with a groan into her back. 

"Well, okay grumpy puppy." Mumbling as he bounded off into the forest. 

She realized as she sat beside the fire waiting for him to return that maybe he wasn't appreciative of her saying he was cute and fluffy. He appeared to be a man and with that came the delicate ego of the typical male. 

She'd apologize, he was feeding her after all. Groaning at that thought she began to wonder what was going on. He obviously knew something about the orb, hoping she'd get more than a sentence or two worth of information out of him. 

A large deer was plopped to her right with a disgusting wet thud. Returning to his humanoid form and was clearly glaring. He may be a hard one to read but this was clear. He was not happy at all and she could bet on why.

"I'm sorry I called you cute and fluffy. You are powerful, deadly and fierce." She said it was clear determination that she wanted him to listen. As his gaze lessened a bit. She took it as a sign that he was at least less annoyed with her.

"So, what's your name anyway? I can't keep calling you the flying man." Going over near the dear trying to think of a way to cut a chunk off. 

Seeing her struggle a bit helplessly pulling on the deer, he bent down and skillfully cut a generous portion for her and handed it over. She accepted and went near the fire. 

"Sesshoumaru." He wasn't sure why he didn't add his title, most likely due to his annoyance overall. 

Watching as she plopped a large rock in the fire guessing it would the best way to cook the deer. She really missed modern camping items. "I'm Shadow. I come with the night and stalk my prey." His bored look was back. She blinked at him a few times. Clearly he was unconvinced.

She burst out laughing. She was having a bit of fun, might as well. "Kai." Muttering almost doubting he heard her, unsure why she was reluctant to give her name. Perhaps it would make everything more real about her situation.

Kai finished cooking and pulled the hot meat off the rock and onto a pile of fresh leaves, sitting down next to the fire and began to eat.

"I do hope you do not plan to eat the leaves as well." Oh that asshole! He had been watching her the whole time and she was not amused. With a deep breath she simply muttered with her mouth stuffed full.

“Shut up, fluffy." She laughed softly at how absurd the whole thing was.

After she finished eating she sat there and rubbed her arms. They hurt, as if they had been burned. At first when she let go of the orb, she felt relief most likely from the horrid pain stopping. Anything else would have felt like a relief. Now hours later she noticed how much pain she was in. Kai wondered how long they'd be there or if they'd ever fade away. It was somewhat liked being forced full sleeve tattoos with no choice in the matter.

"So, what's going to happen?" Cautiously asking, dreading the answer. It could be just about anything. 

"You are to come with me and serve my lands." Oh yeah that sure cleared things up, so elaborate.

"Serve your lands doing what?" She had a feeling whatever the orb was, it wasn't good. She didn't want anything to do with it.

"As a prophetess, a miko of souls." Okay that did clear some things up.

"I'm never touching that thing again" gesturing to the orb with a clearly distressed look. "If it's the only reason why you need me, then it's solved." She quickly stood and grabbed the handle of the tank top bag. 

"What do you intend to do?" He eyed her closely unsure of what she would do next.

"You can have it. I don't want it. I will never touch that thing again." And she walked towards him to hand it over. The sooner she got rid of it, the sooner she could... do what exactly? Well, whatever it was, it sure as hell wasnt touching that.

"The Orb of Souls is bound to you and only you." With that she stopped and her mouth twisted in contemplation. 

"I'll smash it with a hammer!" She laughed fully only to stop realizing he had no idea what she was referencing. 

"Or a rock. Or I'll do this..." she whirled the bag up over her head and smashed the thing to the ground after the fourth time she realized it may look like a hollow glass globe but was as strong as a pure lead one.

"Fine." She huffed and sat down with a thud in defeat, throwing the stupid thing as far as she could. Only to have it roll back to her.

"You will be well taken care of." He wasn't sure why she was so against this. She had no home or family here, she had nothing. This would at least give her life purpose and it was going to be a long life at that. 

She only sighed and looked away. For the first time, he saw sadness in her eyes, smelled it in her scent. He couldn't help the thoughts of what that reason may be, not once had she seemed sad for what she lost.

"What about the rest of the deer? What do we do with the it?" A nice change of subject. She no longer had the scent of sadness, her eyes back to the bright life they always seemed to be.

"I will eat it." He would allow her to avoid the subject for the time being, she couldn't deny her fate in the end. 

"All of it? Wow, that's impressive. Do you always eat that much every day?" Her curiosity beaming from her, she wanted to know everything.

"Yes and no. I hunt every few days for larger game." He should just ignore her. Though he had to admit it was nice not having to suffer the stench of fear while having a conversation for once. 

"That's fascinating." She yawned. Clearly tired and there were only a few hours left of darkness she should sleep. Too much swirled through her mind to sleep though. "What did you mean by 'your lands'? Are you some kind of high up guy?"

"I am Lord of the Western Lands." He said it was pride altering his usual monotone standard. 

"That's really neat. I'm not anything like that, obviously. What are the Western Lands like?" She was fascinated, she had never met a Lord before. 

"You are in them already. They are peaceful, I kill all who interfere. My lands are the most feared and most prosperous." There was that hint of pride coming through again. She could tell he cared about his lands deeply, his honor was tied to them. She yawned again. "Sleep little human." 

She nodded her head and went over to sit next to him. He was curious as to why but didn't care enough to ask. She curled up in her ball and rested her back against the same tree he was resting against. "I'm not little, you know. I'm taller than most humans." with that Kai drifted off to sleep while rubbing her arms.


	5. To the Castle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Off to the castle and begin her new journey with the flying man. Youkai, kami why couldn't she remember that?

CHAPTER 5: To the Castle

Ooooh so fluffy. She snuggled her face in deeper to the fluffy warmth. Oh and it vibrates how... weird. Growling, that's growling. She opened her eyes and realized while asleep she was nearly molesting Lord Sesshoumaru. She leaned up and off his shoulder and pelt thing. Muttering apologizes. With a grimace on her face she stood trying to avoid eye contact all costs. 

"We shall be off." If he was willing to pretend that didn't just happen, she was too. 

They both began to walk off towards further west, or so she guessed. She still had no clue. He stopped when they came to a clearing. Without so much as a warning, he put his arm around her and took the skies. She gave a little squeak of surprise and a small gasp at the world below as it flew by, it was beautiful.

Soon after a large fortress appeared nestled in the mountain side. Down below in front of it a large market place surrounded by tall stone walls and two large wooden doors. It teemed with life all all kinds. Kaiya realized she was the odd man out in the species pool. Were humans less in numbers or was this a nonhuman kingdom of sorts? She supposed it didn't matter much, she was to serve them either way. 

Sesshoumaru flew over the market place and landed outside the heavy castle doors. Releasing her and walking straight towards them. Without hesitation the sturdy guards opened them. 

A green toad came rushing in and a preteen girl not far behind. "Lord Sesshoumaru! We are so happy for your return, my lord!" It was obvious the green thing was a youkai as well but the girl, she looked completely human. 

The young girl rushed up hugging Sesshoumaru in the biggest bear hug a small girl could give. "I'm so happy you're home Lord Sesshoumaru!" 

"Rin." He touched the top of her head and she released him with a big smile gracing her face. She looked to be about 10 or 11 years old and obviously knew him well. Kai wondered what the story was behind that. 

"Who's that lord Sesshoumaru? She looks pretty! Is she going to stay with us?" She had big hopeful eyes, as if she didn't often come across human women to relate to. 

"This is Kai. She will be staying with us. We can discuss this further at our evening meal. Now return to your studies, Rin." With a bright wave she bounded off. 

"Prepare a room for the woman." He paused in thought and added "near Rin's room." Two servants over to his right bounded off through the doorway leaving Kai to wonder what to do next. 

"Um, what do you want me to do?" She was oddly hesitant asking. 

"Come with me, you will need attire not fit for a whore." He began walking without even looking in her direction, back towards the entrance. Towards the marketplace. Jaken following behind her.

"I do Not dress like a whore." She was tired, her arms felt on fire and frankly she was too hungry to be called a whore. 

He didn't acknowledge her statement. Just continued down the steps, through the large doors they had just entered and into the marketplace. She grumbled about how much of a jerk he was for saying that and followed. 

....

It was absolutely amazing. Large wooden carts which reminded her of gypsy caravans full of different wares. So many beautiful things met with equally exotic and beautiful youkai running them. 

He stopped at a large stand with silks of all colors folded neatly over a table in front of it. The woman running it was stunning. She had long flowing pink hair and eyes the color of rubies. Her skin was a deep chocolate and flawless. 

"Lord Sesshoumaru. How nice It is to see you again, my dear. How is your pup doing? She hasn't been by in nearly two weeks, I miss her."

"She is well Aki. She visited my brother and just returned recently, catching up on her studies. I shall send her to visit soon." Regal as always with a face of indifference but she could tell that he knew this woman and well. Perhaps they were lovers or at the very least friends.

"Now then, what brings you? You don't often visit the marketplace." She had a kind smile on, one that only comes with endearment. 

"This woman needs proper attire. Immediately." He still didn't even glance her way but the woman did. She had surprise in her eyes and a smirk on her lips.

"And who might she be to you? Finally settling down and taking a mate?" Kai snorted loudly at the thought he was going to take her as his mate, which she figured was equal to a wife of sorts. With that he did meet her gaze and he was not as amused as she was. Lao rolled her eyes. 

"No. She is has important duties to the west and needs to be dressed as such." 

"Oh I see! Let me look at what I have already made that looks to fit her. I can have some things made in a few days time as well. I presume she will be staying in the castle, I can have them brought there." She began sorting through the brightly colored silks and holding them next to Kai's face to judge the effect. 

Aki chose a light sky blue for an inner kimono paired with a deeper blue outer one adorned with a beautiful scene stitched in silvers and greens, a thunderstorm over a meadow on the sleeves. She finished off the look with a silver obi. She handed it all over to Kai and continued on sorting through things. 

"Thank you, these are so lovely." She ran her hand over the soft fabrics draped in her arms. 

"It's perfect for you considering. You two can go ahead and I'll send some more with Jaken. Come for tea sometime soon Lord Sesshoumaru. It was nice to meet you." She gave a warm smile to them both. 

Kai smiled. "I'm Kai, it was nice to meet you too."

Sesshoumaru simply tilted his head and turned with kai following in step behind him. They returned to the castle in which the same two servants from earlier had come back to wait for them. 

"Jiro will show you to your room. You will then bathe and dress properly. Afterwards Suzu will take you to the healer to deal with your pain. We will meet for evening meal and discuss things further." He looked directly at her with a fierce authority when he spoke. There would be no arguments. 

"How did you know I was in pain?" She had done her best to try to hide it and was a bit taken aback by him knowing.

"It is in your scent." He stated it as a matter of fact, as if she should have known. 

"Oh. Thank you. Thank you for being so kind to me." she then followed Jiro down a long hallway leaving Sesshoumaru slightly stunned although none would ever have known it. No one had ever called him kind. He had been described as many things but kind was not one of them 


	6. Seeking answers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So many questions so few answers

She was brought to a large room with dark wooden chests against the wall, perfectly painted landscapes on the walls and even a vanity with a framed mirror. On the other side of the room was another set of shoji doors.

"Through there, across the garden is the bath house. It will have everything you need in there already. Including a robe to wear back to your room. If you need anything just ask, I won't be too far." He didn't smile but his words were soft. She thought maybe all youkai men lacked the ability to smile at this point. His black hair pulled up and emerald eyes paired with a nicely tanned skin made him nice to look at, more so if he smiled. 

"Thank you. Oh, is there somewhere I can get something to eat? I'm rather hungry." 

"I will bring something for you here." She put on her best smile for him as he bowed his head and left Kai to herself. She set her new clothes and the makeshift bag down on the vanity and started towards the doors to the bathhouse when she heard a loud thump. 

"Oh just kill me." She groaned as she turned to see the dumb ball rolling towards her. "I can't even take a bath without you? Really?" She kicked it and it rolled right back at her feet. 

"Stupid fucking ball." She grudgingly picked up the handles and made her way to the bathhouse. Maybe she could drown the thing? Probably not since it lacked lungs but it wouldn't stop her from trying.  
...

He sat behind the low table looking through the various papers needed to keep his lands in order. It was boring and tedious but needed. He took pride in his work to keep his lands in perfection. They were the most prosperous because of his attention to detail. 

Sesshoumaru even went as far as to make sure everyone had a job and a place. He enjoyed the fact that there was not anyone, who was able, who didn't have a purpose. It made the Western Lands more honorable as well as keeping the people busy decreased the amount troublemakers. 

Sesshoumaru couldn't help but think to the woman. He really needed to explain what her duties were and ask about what she saw in her first vision. She was overall a mystery to him as well. Which was somewhat exciting, there rarely was any mysteries around him. He also needed to make sure she was going to stay and not leave and join another alliance and that meant gaining her trust and loyalty. The very thought annoyed him.

...

 

She sat down at the vanity adorned in her new clothing brushing her damp sandy blonde hair. Staring at herself in the mirror she certainly looked different in this. Really, she felt different altogether. so much had changed in a matter of days. She munched on the delicious cheese and fruits as she brushed and went over the last few days in her mind. Kai was feeling a lot better with food in her belly, her mood improving.

With a knock and gentle sliding of the doors Suzu glided in. A sweet looking woman with white hair piled on top of her head into a bun. Black eyes, near white skin and a soft smile, she was beautiful. 

"I'm here to take you to the healer. Here are some slippers for you to wear as well." She handed them over and Kai put them on and grabbed the dumb orb. She thought about making it roll after her the whole way but figured she wouldn't want the added attention. 

They walked out, through the long hallway up several staircases and twists and turns so many she was positive she was lost already. They arrived at a small room with a futon on the floor to the right and cabinets stuffed full of different substances in glass bottles. A man with light green skin and a black feathered Mohawk turned to greet them. He had beautiful silvery eyes, any woman could get lost in those. Kai wondered if all the men were so handsome but quickly doubted it thinking of Jaken.

"Come in, come in." He was smiling, a male smiling for once! Suzu stayed outside and closed the doors. "I am Botan. I've been told to expect you. I hear you have pain, my child."

"I'm Kai. Um, I really don't want to complain." She really didn't, she never liked being doted and even less about pain. 

"Don't be silly. It's what I'm here for, there is no reason a pretty woman should ever be in pain when she doesn't have to be." She could tell he was a gentle soul, being a healer was truly his calling in life.

 

"it's here in my arms. They feel like they've been burnt. It happened last night when I touched this orb," she held up the bag in proof of the offending orb. "and the throbbing just isn't going away." She pulled up her sleeves and showed him with her palms up. 

He took her hands in his and looked carefully. "You are a prophetess, a miko of souls. You have been marked as such." He continued to look carefully at her new marks "very interesting indeed. Well, they will heal in a few days but until then I shall give you a salve to put on them tonight and a tea to drink when the pain gets to be too bad. I suspect tomorrow the pain itself will begin to ease." He flipped her hand over and patted it gently. "And should you find yourself having trouble sleeping you come back and see me." She wondered what he meant by that and how did he know what she was, if that's what she even really was? Kami she needed answers. 

He handed her a few bottles and she tucked them into the bag with the orb so she wouldn't have to carry them in her tender hands. "Thank you so much. It was nice to meet you, Botan." She waved and headed out where Suzu was waiting to take her back to her room. 

....

When they arrived back to her room a futon was laid out for her with very soft looking blankets and pillows, certainly fit for a castle. They were in whites and vanilla colors, the top one had soft pink cherry blossoms stitched across the bottom. 

"We figured that you may want to rest for a while" Suzu turned and walked back the the doors with a quiet click of the screens shutting. 

Left to herself, Kai laid the Orb down next to the futon and took off her slippers before laying down. She was ready for a good nap, sleeping on the ground was not very fun the past two nights. Falling into a luxurious sleep quickly.

She was awoken again by her name being called "Kaiya... Kaiya" she sat up and noticed the orb glowing again. She really didn't want to touch the thing but felt compelled to. Unwrapping it and pulling the orb into her lap she grabbed ahold. 

"Ah, very good child." A man spoke so clearly it was as if he was right there. She opened her eyes she hadn't realized she closed and came face to face with a man sitting in front of her. 

Clearly startled she blurted out "who the hell are you?"

He just chuckled at her, flicking his silvery white pony tail over his shoulder. He had golden eyes just like Sesshoumaru but different markings. Instead he had one single jagged stripe on each cheekbone. 

"I am Inu no Taisho. Sesshoumaru's father." She moved to let go of the Orb and he stopped her placing his hands on top of hers. "I am a spirit now, this is how I am communicating with you. It's been such a long time since the west has been blessed with one of your kind." 

She should have been afraid, should have been weary of it all but she felt calm. Her arms weren't burning but felt warm and glowed in the rhythm of the flowing energy inside the Orb. 

"Why did this happen to me? I don't want any of this." She thought maybe just get right to it and ask the one question she wanted an answer to most. 

"Your time was finished in your world, this one needed you. You understand better than most the pain and destruction of war can bring, the toll death takes on the living. This is your chance to live again, Kaiya. To help save others, to stop pain and suffering while healing your own heart." His eyes were intense and his voice deep, she couldn't help but listen to his words and the heaviness within them. 

"There has to be someone better suited for this than I am. I am not anybody special, just a normal woman. I don't want this responsibility." Her heart was racing, it was the answers she was seeking but not all at once. 

"That is one o the reasons the Kami chose you. Those who do not wish for power, are the ones who can be trusted with it. Kaiya, you are balanced in your heart and that is what will be needed in the time to come." He removed his hands from hers.

"I don't really have a choice in all of this, do I?" She sighed heavily and resolved herself to her fate. This is who she will be from now on. 

"I am afraid you do not. This will help you find peace again. You will be whole once more." 

"I'll never be whole again. With him half my soul died, nothing will ever bring that back...But I will do whatever needs to be done." She dropped her eyes from his to stare at the swirling energy inside the orb. 

"Very well. Until we meet again." He stood as she released the Orb and just sat there quietly until she heard a knock and the doors slide open. 

"Kai, it is time for the evening meal. If you will follow me." Jiro held his hand out while she put the orb back into the bag, she grabbed it and stood up following him down the hallway and into the dining room.

.......


	7. Expectations

She sat at the low table eating the food given, Sesshoumaru at the head, Rin at his right and Kai at the left. Run was chattering away about her day while the other two listened. It was a pleasant meal altogether.

Afterwards Rin retired to her room while Kai and Sesshoumaru stayed for tea, hers being the one the healer gave her earlier in the day.

"Is your room to your liking?" An ice breaker if she ever heard one. 

"Yes, it's wonderful. I also had a very interesting guest come visit me there. He said he was your father." Direct and to the point, she wanted to talk about the orb. 

"I suspected he would come." He sighed barely noticeable. "Did he say what he wanted?" He turned toward her awaiting her answer.

"He came for more of a welcome to the world of spirits and stuff kind of thing. He answered a few of my questions, which in turn made me accept the position I've been put in. I'd like to know what you want from me in line of my duties here. I can't just bum off you, I want to feel like I've earned my keep." She meant it too, she had never been anyone's burden and she wasn't going to start being one now. 

"I wish for you to tell me what you saw in your first vision. To tell when you have others as well. You have found you have the ability to speak with spirits already and it is expected you consult with them if needed." That seemed pretty simple. She could do that, be the miko of souls. The name even made more sense now. 

Feeling more confident with her place she felt relieved. "That I can do, Sesshoumaru. Can I ask you something?"

"Hn." He waited for her question which he knew would be personal, people always asked permission before when it would be personal. He thought it would be about his adopted daughter, Rin. 

"Are you happy? You always have a mask on, I just wondered if it's because that's how you really feel." That was a very personal question. Truth was he wasn't even sure himself. He felt pride ruling his lands, he felt warmth in the presence of his Rin, victorious in battle. But happy? 

"I have no need of happiness." Sesshoumaru thought that to be true. He had his duties and honor and that was enough. 

"Hm, maybe I'll feel that way one day too. Besides I found out I can't drown the orb in the bath like I thought so I guess I got a while to figure it out." She threw him a playful smile. 

"You do indeed have a very long time. You shall live as long as I do unless you are killed. The Orb has tied your soul itself." She wasn't sure what he was saying. After all having just met Youkai recently.

"And how long is that exactly?" She was curious now. She hadn't planned on a longer life.

"It could be an eternity. I have not come across a DaiYoukai to die of old age yet nor one of you kind."

"Well. I certainly wasn't expecting be told I may be immortal. Best not to dwell on it guess. So, a human daughter, huh? Better get to know you since we will be together a very long time." She wanted to change the subject away from her much longer lifespan and hoped he would take the bait.

"Hn." Still not one for talking about personal matters.

"Oh come on, fluffy! You've got to give me something here. What if you answer one for me and I'll answer one for you and we will call it a night." He stared at her and rose to his feet walking to the doors. 

"This Sesshoumaru is not fluffy."He turned and looked back at her waiting for her to follow. They walked through to the garden while he explained all about how he found Rin and resurrected her and in the process gained a daughter he never expected to have. She could see the love for her in his eyes with a softness in them she hadn't seen up to this point. He wasn't as cold as he first appeared to be. 

"Now my turn, woman. Did you jump?" She was caught off guard with that question or maybe she was just hoping he wouldn't ask. 

She stopped near a large tree near the edge of the pond and stared up at the starry sky. "You know, the stars are more vibrant here. You couldn't hardly see them where I'm from. There is too much light blocking the view." 

"You have not answered my question." It seemed his voice was softer to her. As if he knew the answer already but just wanted confirmation.

She glanced back at him and answered simply "yes." Relieved when he didn't ask for anything more. They stood in comfortable silence until she yawned. She really needed more sleep. 

"Sesshoumaru, why does everyone keep saying my kimono suits me?" They began to walk back inside the castle.

"Your scent. Before it was of clean water, summer air and lavender. Now it is a summer thunderstorm with traces of lavender. A scent of cleanliness, refreshing and dangerous." She thought that was pretty interesting that she had a unique scent. What did he smell like? Could he smell himself?

"That almost sounded romantic, don't go falling in love with me now." With a cheeky grin she nudged his arm in play. Kai was now pretty determined to get him to loosen up a bit after finding out they'd know each a long time.

Slightly, ever so slightly caught off guard he gave a small smirk "i will keep that in mind" she was a very interesting woman and a whirl wind of emotions turning one off and another on the next in an instance. Life would definitely not be boring any time soon.

"Alright, I'll see ya tomorrow. Good night, Sesshoumaru." He gave a nod and continued down the hallway 4 more sets of doors and entered his own room as she entered hers.


	8. Life worth saving

Two weeks had passed since she first came to live with Sesshoumaru and Rin, in the amazing castle. Everyday there was a new place to explore. Today was just outside the walls.

Kai was picking flowers in the field with Rin while Sesshoumaru looked on and walked about the tall grass. He claimed it was to scent mark but by now she knew differently, he enjoyed watching his daughter play and laugh. 

"Kai, are boys always so dumb at my age?" Oh boy, here we go. Kai just hoped Sesshoumaru was out of ear shot for what was possibly coming.

"About how old are you? Ten or eleven? Then yes. Absolutely." She tried to keep it light. She wanted Rin to trust her.

"I'm just small for my age. I'm thirteen, fourteen next spring! I just wondered because there is a boy I like and I don't think he notices me. I'd really like him to." please be out of ear shot, please be out of ear shot. Kai glanced over toward him, he was staring. Fifty fifty chance he heard. 

"Well, tell me about this boy then. Most boys and men overlook how a woman feels about them. It's not that they're doing it on purpose, it's often they feel she is too special to ever want him." Truthful and direct. She remembered one in particular who had no clue for seemingly ages. She had to outright kiss him before he realized it. Kai certainly wasn't gonna tell Rin that though, Sesshoumaru would probably burst a vein with how protective of her he was. She giggled at the very thought. 

"I met him years ago when everyone had to fight together to defeat Naraku. His name is Kohaku, Sango's younger brother. He is just so cute and very nice to me." Sesshoumaru had told her a bit about the epic battle of Naraku and Rin often shared stories from when she visits everyone. She went about every other month for a week or two, sometimes just for a few days when Sesshoumaru had something to do in the area.

"Oh I see! It's your first crush! How exciting it is. He may be a bit too old for you right now. So that may be why he isn't returning the feelings just yet. Don't give up hope though, he is what, fifteen now?" Oh she remembered the days of being a young teen. 

"He is sixteen right now." Her voice sounded a little defeated. Kai couldn't have that, Rin was a wonderful girl and needed to smile. 

"Don't give up hope, Rin. You have your whole life ahead of you and you'll find it goes by faster than you think. If he is the one for you then it will happen. Be patient. Just enjoy things the way they are now, enjoy his friendship." Okay he was for sure glaring at her now, she could feel his stare at her back. 

"I am almost at the age of marriage, sixteen isn't that far off!" She was very excited about that, perking right up.

"Perhaps you should even go as far as to waiting til eighteen or twenty..." catching a glimpse of the Youkai she added "five, twenty five." He began to walk the fields again. Poor girl may never marry if he had his way. 

"Did you ever find someone, how old were you?" An innocent question with an answer unwillingly sitting on her tongue. Never one to lie to those she cared about she answered. 

"I was twenty. I always liked that I waited a bit longer, I got to enjoy just being me and finding out who I was before I found someone. That way I knew I was with the right person. Now, do you think we have enough flowers?" Each had two hands stuffed full of brightly colored flowers. Kai didn't care much to talk about her side of things just yet with how young Rin was.

"I think so. Let's get to making the crowns." One of Ron's favorite hobbies was to make flower crowns. She always made a few crowns and gave them to any woman that crossed her path, she'd just stop and give them one. A kind soul through and through.

After they sat for a while and made 4 overly stuffed crowns, they each placed one atop their head and walked over to Sesshoumaru. Kai was feeling mischievous, walking up the the great Youkai lord who was sitting with his back against the tree. She casually strode over and placed one atop his head. Rin giggled and followed suit. 

"Oh Lord Sesshoumaru! You look so beautiful! I could make you one every day." Rin was so proud. Maybe this woman wasn't the best influence on his daughter. Daiyoukai do not wear flowers in their hair. He made a move to remove them and stopped seeing Rin's sweet face drop. Instead he gave a rare small smile and his signature "hn". He used to despise the feeling of being weak when it came to her, over the years he realized because of her he is even stronger. Someone to protect does that more than anything else. 

"Are you ready to return?" He could see they both seemed a bit tired, the summer sun usually took a lot out of the human girls. The sun would be setting soon too, which made it harder for the humans to see, he didn't want either to get injured walking back. 

"I think so. I don't know about Rin, but I could use a little something to eat." They all began to walk through the field along the tree line back home. Home, was this her home now? Was it okay to even call it her home? 

Kai heard rustling in some leaves near a tree mixed with soft whimpers. She immediately headed straight for it. Sesshoumaru stopped and watched her, he was hoping she would go anywhere but towards the annoyance in the leaves. Of course that's where she was going. 

"Hey! Come look over here!" She bent down and stared at the little fur ball hissing and swiping his paws. A tiny kitten no more than eight or so weeks old. All alone too. 

"Leave it." There he was giving a command again. She noticed he used that particular tone when he really didn't want to argue. It was just a slight difference, but she was starting to notice them bit. As much as human could.

"Is his momma around anywhere? We can't just leave him alone to die." She spoke softly and intentionally added that he would die alone so Rin would help out if needed. Underhanded for sure but she didn't care. She wasn't leaving a poor kitten alone. It didn't matter what kind of baby it was, any baby she'd do the same. 

"She is a runt left behind." Did she not understand the laws of nature? The weak do not survive. 

She grabbed the kitten by the scruff of her neck, opened her outer kimono and popped her in all while she was hissing and scratching her arm. Once she put her in there she immediately calmed and snuggled in. 

"I'm not leaving her." She stood and started to walk back. She was testing his patience and she knew it, she wasn't going to bend.

"You are not taking the cat back with us." He was visibly annoyed, well as much as he could be with his mask of indifference.

"Oh yes I am. Look, Rin and I will take care of her and that will be that." Now she was commanding him. Kai was lucky she wasn't just anybody. 

"Please! Oh please can we keep her?" Rin gave him the biggest puppy dog eyes a human girl could give. He realized he had already lost the battle. His father taught him a long time ago to chose your battles wisely and so he chose to let it go. 

"She will need a crown." He took both off his head and handed them to Rin who plopped them over the kitten's neck. Kai didn't miss how he took the chance to rid himself of the flowers. 

"We could name her after you." A big smile and a wrinkled nose Kai continued walking on. 

"No." He would not have his name sullied like that. 

"What do you think we should name her, Rin?" She pulled back her kimono a bit so Rin could get a better view. She was pure white with ice blue eyes, an abnormality in the wild. Perhaps one of the reasons she was abandoned, she'd never be able to properly hide or hunt unless there was snow.

"We could name her Sno or Sakura because she's so beautiful." She was the cutest little floof ball alive that was for sure.

"She does look an awful lot like you Sesshoumaru. We could name her fluffy." Both girls burst into laughter.

"I am not a cat nor am I fluffy." He resisted rolling his eyes. Why was she so determined to call him fluffy?

"Okay okay. I like both the names Sno and Sakura, so you pick Rin." 

"Kata." The girls were shocked he actually put a name out there. 

"What does it mean, Lord Sesshoumaru?" Rin was ecstatic that he was involved now. She hoped it meant he wasn't too angry about taking the kitten home. They had reached the castle and were almost to the doors.

"Worthy. In time we will find out if the kitten is indeed worthy of your compassion." It very much seemed like him to pick a name that could have a lesson wrapped up in it later. 

"It's perfect! Her name is Kata." Kai handed the sleeping kitten over to Rin and watched the girl bound away to the kitchen to get food and water for it. Kai hoped it was already weened. She knew very little about cats, she was allergic. 

"I do not wish to have anymore animals living here." Kai rolled her eyes at his warning. She wouldn't take it to heart. 

"I need to bathe, I'll see you for tea tonight?" They had eaten dinner before heading out, they had tea together after almost every meal or went for a walk with Rin. She liked the company. 

She had even taken to touching the Orb when it was just the two of them trying to see if another vision would come on. He never did say anything about the first vision. She didn't know if that was a good thing or not and never pressed it. 

"Yes and see the healer for that rash and cuts." Damnit he noticed. She had a rash everywhere the kitten rubbed on. She sneezed three times in a row. How on earth was she gonna hide this. 

"Uh yeah, I'll be fine. Just a bath and I'll be as good as knew. It's nothing, really." She was pleading with her eyes for him to understand that she didn't want to make this a big deal. 

"Suit yourself." If she wasn't going to care enough about her health he wouldn't, at least not when it wasn't anything serious. 

.....

Good as new with a hot bath and fresh clothes Kai grabbed the Orb and went to the garden. Sesshoumaru sat with the tea at the usual low table. She sat beside him. 

"I heard what you said to Rin about boys." Why did he always have to just make a statement instead of just asking what he wanted to know?

"Yes and?" And you really want to drag this out don't you? 

"I appreciate you telling her to wait longer." Well now that was unexpected. She thought he would have been upset at her even speaking about boys to Rin. 

"No problem. I'd like to be close to her. She'll be a woman soon and will need a human woman to explain things. Are human women and Youkai women the same?"

"I do not know. Rin is the first human I have had constant contact with." He wondered if he should be worried. Does a female go through such drastic changes?

"I can explain what a human female goes through and you can tell me if it is. So when we become a woman we are still young, anytime from eleven to fourteen rare cases earlier. Rin hasn't yet I don't think. I'm sure you'd know. We, bleed from our womanly parts every month for three to five days. It's our uterus, the baby making pocket in our belly, shedding his lining when it's not used." He looked a little perplexed. She couldn't tell if it was because of the words she was using or really what that look was about. She continued on.

"Okay so for humans the man carries the seed and the woman the egg. We are most fertile two weeks after our bleeding where the egg is ready to go. If it's fertilized with the mans seed then it goes into the uterus and bing bang boom, a baby is made. Forty weeks later a baby is born." He knew how babies were made and here she was explaining it to him like a child. She used terms he hadn't heard before and that's what perplexed him, how did she know the inner workings of her body?

"I understand how babies are created, woman. How did you come to know the inner workings of the body?" Perhaps she was a healer in her time.

"Oh, they teach you all that kind of stuff in school. I actually wanted to be a OB/GYN, a uh midwife doctor but I quickly found I didn't have the heart for the death part and never went further with it. I somewhat regret not pushing further but I know I couldn't handle it in the end. Takeo, used to tell me it was because my heart was too big for it all. I don't think I'll ever understand that though." She realized she slipped up and mentioned his name, she wasn't ready to let it all out but it was too late. 

"Inu-Youkai are different. They go into heat every three months for five days usually they bleed during that time." She was grateful he seemed to be letting it go. 

"That seems nice. I'd much rather prefer that. I wonder if my cycle will change since, ya know the whole orb thing. Hundreds of years of moonsickness every month sounds daunting." She let out a laugh, it all seemed so ridiculous.

"Okay let's do this." She pulled the Orb into her lap and dumped it out of its bag. "I really need to make a new bag for this. Do you think I could have some yarn and a crochet hook?" 

"Yes. Although I am unfamiliar what a crochet hook is." More things about her he didn't know. Every day was something new. Yesterday he had noticed she liked to draw things in sand mindlessly. A few days ago she told him all about how she tramped all over the world helping people and she wasn't as useless in the wild as he first thought. She just lacked the right tools. He enjoyed the puzzle of her. 

"It's a little hook. Hm, I'm not sure how to explain it." She laughed fully. "I think I can make one pretty easily with a knife and some sticks. So maybe a knife I can barrow?" She grabbed the Orb with both hands and waited. Nothing had happened since she saw Sesshoumaru's father. It seemed dormant for now. 

"I will make sure you get what you need." She had to wonder if he was disappointed the Orb wouldn't connect him to his father. Maybe she could try something. She grabbed it more firmly and called out with her heart, willing her energy into the ball. It began to glow, her eyes changed and her tattoos, as she called them, began to glow with the rhythm of the energy. 

"Nice to see you again child." Inu no Tashio stood tall in front of her. "Have you called me for a reason?" He sat down in front of her across from the table. Sesshoumaru looked on, he could not see anyone but Kai.

"I thought maybe there was a way for you and Sesshoumaru to be able to talk to each other." Hopefully this wasn't a bad idea. It could easily backfire on her. 

"You must find the answers on your own." Oh damnit, why does everything have to be so difficult with this thing? She had an idea. 

"Sesshoumaru put your hands on top of mine." he didn't question her as he leaned over shoulders and arms touching, hands over hands. The closeness made him a little uneasy, he wasn't used to being close to someone like this without it being a battle. He saw his father sitting in front of them, a wide smile on. 

"Father." As he stared at his father's eyes once more he was overcome with gratitude. He could never repay her for this gift. He admired his father more than any person in his entire life.

"My son. I see you are doing well for yourself. You now have a pup of your own, someone to protect. Do you understand now what I had been trying to teach you all those years?" He had a wide smile on his face and pride gleaming in his eyes. 

"Yes, father." He really did finally understand. The only regret he ever had is that he hadn't learned sooner, that he wasn't able to understand his father better in the end. 

"I'm a proud of you, Sesshoumaru. Know that I have always been. My grand-Pup is a wonderful child, you have done well with her. I do wish you would let her call you father. I believe your relationship would grow even closer." Kai couldn't help but note even in the afterlife a father would always still be a father. 

"She does as she pleases." He had never thought about what she called him or didn't call him. 

"No, she does what she thinks pleases you. Just talk to the child. Now, you and your brother seem to be on better terms. It makes me very happy to see that. I believe he will have some news for you soon." He let out a bellowing laugh. He was full of joy at whatever secret he was hinting at. 

"Do they not have enough pups?" Quick as ever Sesshoumaru wasn't one to be blinded. 

"The world is big, you can never have enough pups. You should make some of your own, add to your pack." Kai started to giggle. she tried, really she did, to not giggle. 

Sesshoumaru glared at her and she laughed harder joined in by Inu no Tashio. 

"Or perhaps you've begun to add to your pack already." Nodding his head at Kai. With that she stopped laughing. She knew he could see everything and was just pestering his son, but she couldn't help but turn red at the very thought. 

"Father." His tone serious. Well, it was always serious but more so. 

"Well, I would like to visit more but I have things to do. I love you my son. I may have never said that enough to you but hear it now." He slowly faded away as the Orbs energy faded. 

He let go of her hands and she tucked the ball back away. It was a little awkward for Kai. He seemed like a very personal man and she just jolted him into something very personal as well as close physical contact. She wasn't sure how he would handle it but gathered he would appear the same as always. Kai just wondered how he was feeling, she wanted to ask but refrained from it. 

Kai stood while he remained. "I guess I'll be getting to bed now. I'll check on Rin and the kitten to make sure they're all tucked in." He lifted his head to stare into her eyes. 

"Thank you, Kai." She didn't know what to say. She knew she should say something, anything but wasn't prepared for what tumbled out.

"Uh no problem, I got your back jack." She cringed. Ugh really? That's the first thought? He will never take me seriously at this rate. 

He looked away back out over the garden and remained silent. She left him there to his own thoughts and she travelled to Rin to check in on her. Finding the two curled up together was the sweetest sight she had seen in ages. After tucking the blanket up further around them she returned to her room, finding sleep easily.


	9. Secrets Undone

Kai watched Rin play with the kitten in the soft grass while she sat underneath the cherry tree in the garden. She had awoken to a small knife and a basket full of different colored silk yarns. She had never made a crochet hook before but knew it's shape well. She had gathered some fallen dried sticks and set to at the very least make one. She had already ruined four sticks trying but was getting better at getting the basic shape. 

 

Kata jumped up and down batting at the ribbon Rin dangled above her. A truly endearing sight to see. Kai wished to have a daughter if he own once upon a time, she quietly wondered if she still wanted a family, If maybe she was okay that she still wanted that. Quickly dismissing any thoughts when Rin spoke to her. 

"What was that, Rin? I'm sorry, I was daydreaming." She put down the knife and the stick she was working on, this one might be the one to work out.

"Lord Sesshoumaru said I can call him whatever pleases me. Do you think he would be okay with me calling him father? That's what he has been to me all these years but I don't want him to be upset with me." The fluffy kitten caught the ribbon and pulled at it. 

"I'm sure he would love it. He thinks of you as his daughter. Honestly I'm surprised you two have never had a conversation about it up til now." Oh that man, he really needed to speak his feelings more often. 

"Really, you think so?" Her voice was full of hope and excitement, which it often was. She was a very happy child, well young teen.

"I know so. I wouldn't tell you anything I didn't truly believe myself." That was the truth. Kai was always truthful with those she cared for and she adored Rin. Almost as if he knew he was being spoken about Sesshoumaru came out into the gardens. 

"Rin. Kai." His usual greetings. Like, she would somehow forget her own name. She snorted to herself. 

"Hi.... father." She held her breath and waited for his response. His eyes softened and he nodded. 

"Hey Fluffy. What brings you out here? You're usually stalking around the boarder or stuck doing paperwork now." She knew he didn't like being called that but that's exactly why she did, nearly everyday at least once. 

"You know very well that is not my name." She would keep calling him that regardless because he was fluffy. 

"Yeah, yeah." She waved her hand and dismissed him.

"I have matters to attend to and I may not be back in time for the evening meal. I wished to inform the two of you, I know how you humans worry." His way of saying, I wanted to make sure you two will be alright while I'm gone. Rin had been teaching Kai lately. 

"Anything I can help with?" She wanted to be more helpful with things. She still felt like she wasn't doing enough. 

"No." How elaborate as usual. Rin stood and bounded over to him giving him a warm hug. Kai then got a lovely idea too. She also stood and moved toward him. 

"Be careful, father!" Kai hoped Rin would be more confident calling him that soon and find confidence telling him she loved him one day. She let go and moved back.

Kai then moved in and gave him a huge hug. She knew it would make him uncomfortable and she was delighted.

"Yes be careful, Fluffy!" He was not at all used to be hugged by a woman and it made him feel slightly uncomfortable. He wasn't sure what to do even more so that the top of her head clipped his chin. She stepped back rubbing the top of her head. She would never be graceful. 

"I am Diayoukai, you have no need for concern." Kai giggled and sat back down with Rin settling beside her. As he left Rin pipped up.

"You know what that means." The kitten curling into her lap into a floof ball. 

"What?" Kai had no earthly idea.

"It means there must be something going on like bandits or Ogres or something. He has to go and kill them before they cause trouble." 

"Don't you worry about him doing that? I mean I know he is a huge dog who could take care of it but he is still just one man." How could she know how precise of a killer he was? She hadn't ever seen him in battle before. 

"Not at all. He is the most deadly youkai there ever was! He has even surpassed his father. Everyone fears him and they should. He can kill a hundred men or youkai and not even break a sweat." Kai wasn't sure if Rin was exaggerating or not. She very well could have seen him do so. She suddenly had a disturbing thought. 

"Does he ever kill innocent people?" She felt like she knew the answer but she had to know. 

"Of course not. I can't believe you would ask that." Rin was visibly angry at her for asking such a thing. 

"I'm sorry, Rin. I felt like I had to ask even though I knew what the answer would be. I'm still new to all of this and I just, I guess I thought maybe I needed to ask because I already respect him so much that my judgment could have been off. Sesshoumaru is an honorable man and I should have trusted myself better. Forgive me." She felt foolish for even thinking she needed to ask. 

"It's alright. Really I think most people just assume he doesn't care and would kill anyone who even slightly offended him. He's really not like that though. He kills the people who needs to be. If he was like that then he would have never saved me, he would have left me dead." She could tell Rin had thought about this before, possibly from seeing how people treat him differently than most others.

"Does he get treated differently because he is so powerful?" Could he be so closed off because of how he has been treated his whole life?

"I think so. He never says anything of course but I can see it. He has said something about the scent of fear being pungent and that most carry it. I've seen human and youkai avoid him too. You are one of few who don't treat him any differently. Kagome is nice to him and so is Songo, Miroku too. Inuyasha treats him just like brothers do. They used to fight a lot but now it's more like play fighting. Oh! And Aki is really nice to him too, but she has known him since he was a baby. She used to watch him for his mother." 

"I guess I never really thought about it before." It made Kai sad to think about it. He really was a good man and didn't need to be treated like that just because he was so powerful. 

"I don't think it really bothers him. He seems to like how things are." She wasn't sure if Rin was trying to assure her or herself of that, maybe both.

"Well, it doesn't matter I suppose. He's got us and we are pretty awesome." They giggled as the went back to what they were doing. Kai just hoped one day, even if it was a hundred years from then, that he would at least be more open with her. That way he would have a true friend, even a great diayoukai like him needed to have one. 

.....

Ogres. He despised them, the stink seemed to linger in his nose for hours after he left them. Simple enough to take care of as stupid as they were. 

He had heard the whole conversation before he left. He wasn't angry at Kai's question he had heard it a thousand times before. He had heard it as a statement as if it was the truth. What he hadn't expected was her to be concerned about how others saw him and how they treated him. He had to admit he liked the feeling of being cared about in that way, even if it was only admitting it to himself. Things certainly seemed to keep evolving with her around. 

Sesshoumaru couldn't help but wonder if she would still think the same if he had seen him dispose of the Ogres. Hearing something and seeing it done seemed to be a difference. Kai appeared to have a high value of all life. He felt he had her trust and didn't want to lose that. If he did, his lands could lose her. 

If he was being honest with himself he didn't want to lose her because he enjoyed her company. She made Rin happy, she didn't stink of fear and was charming in her own goofy way. She was a real person not putting on a show to try to get him to mate her. She could be a friend to him, not that he needed such things. 

It was already the middle of the night by the time he had found and killed the group of Ogres using his energy whip. Far too easily to be enjoyable. He transformed and began to run. The night air felt good in his fur and it would surely clear his mind.

....

He arrived back in early hours and retired to his room. After finally laying down for the last few hours of darkness he caught a scent. This would be interesting. His doors slid open as he sat up to see Kai walk in. He watched her cross the room as she came and sat down next to him without so much of a glance. 

"I was worried when you didn't return by the time we went to bed." Staring at her hands and fidgeting, visibly upset even without his sense of smell. 

"There was no need to be." He didn't understand why she was so upset. Did she not understand how powerful he was?

"He said the same thing." A deep breath as silent tears fell slowly from her face. Why did it bother him so much to see her cry? 

"Who was he?" He thought perhaps her father, she looked young perhaps nineteen or twenty the most. 

"My husband. We were married for four years. He always told me not to worry, that he would always come home to me. One day he didn't. Takeo wasn't even supposed to deploy that time, they were short handed and he offered to go. I always believed him, I was a fool to think he was invincible." She was calm and her tone even while the tears slowly fell, never once wiping them away. 

"I am daiyoukai, I will always return." He lifted her chin to look into her eyes as he spoke.

"I want to believe you. All I have now is you and Rin. I can't go back to having nothing, I can't go back to being nothing." He did the only thing he knew to, embraced her like he did many times to Rin after a bad dream. 

So much made sense for him now. Kai's secrets were coming out and he was astonished at her strength. She always seemed so carefree and happy all the time, caring so much for others and never in self pity. He hadn't even so much as scented anything amiss. She kept her emotions just as much in check as he did, maybe they were more alike than he thought. 

"Why have you not spoken of this earlier?" He wanted to keep her talking, she was confiding in him building trust in him more. 

A pitiful laugh escaped her lips. "I don't care to be pitied." She relaxed more in his arms, she felt safe there. "I'm still young, only 26, I was 24 when it happened. People hear I'm a widow and so young and the pity in their eyes kill me. I'm no longer a person to them, just a sad shell to be tiptoed around. I didn't want to let it out like this, I'm not weak. I'm not weak." She repeated it more to herself than to him. 

"I do not pity you. Death is a part of life we all must face. You have adapted well and continue to thrive, that is the best way to honor Takeo." Sesshoumaru believed she would have liked to tell him in a different way but it didn't matter to him how she told him. 

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't be in here crying like a little girl, it's inappropriate of me."she tried to back away but was stopped when he held on tighter. He wasn't going to let go until he knew she was alright, although a little unsure as to why he cared so.

"You have nothing to apologize for, Kai. You have become part of my pack and as so I will always take care of you as I do Rin." That had to be what it was, somehow she had come in and made herself part of the pack. She cared for Rin as a sister or daughter and seemed to care for him as well. He released her and brushed away her tears looking into her eyes, waiting for the brightness to return. It wouldn't though, not tonight, it was too painful. Too near the surface to be suppressed again. She said nothing.

"Tell me about your husband." He wasn't very good at the softer side of things. Trying to think of what Rin would do, he would have her speak of what was causing her pain, hoping to lessen it. 

"He was an amazing man. Takeo laughed a lot and always had a smile on around me. He was also a very logical man and serious. I would have never guessed it but he told me he didn't laugh nearly as much before he met me. He said I helped remove the stick out of his ass." A genuine laugh. "He was kind to everyone, even if they didn't deserve it. Generous beyond belief and always helpful. Very tall too, I like tall men since I'm so tall myself. We were both adopted by Japanese parents when we were just babies so we bonded over that as well. Not that you could tell at all." She gave another laugh. Anyone with two working eyeballs could tell she wasn't born to her parents and the same went for him, it was kind of an inside joke between them.

"He must have been a good man if you speak so highly of him" she may have been quirky but overall had a good head on her shoulders. 

"He really was. The day we met, I had just felt so tired, my soul was tired. I don't really know what I had expected other than I just wanted to be free from feeling like that. I just took a leap of faith that my suffering would end. I think that maybe it has, I still feel his loss but I also feel like I have something to live for again, that I have purpose here. You don't have to say anything, I know you were curious about why. One thing I've learned about you is you're very smart and enjoy puzzles."

"I was curious, yes." He shifted crossing his legs and she did the same.

"Have you ever been in love? Maybe I should ask if you ever allowed yourself to be in love." Had he ever been? Could he have had someone who meant so much to him before?

"Before Rin I believed such a thing was a weakness." He had learned so much since the little girl stormed into his life.

"And now?" Sounds like such a lonely life. 

"Most fear me. It would be hard to fall in love with someone who did not trust me enough. Who always smells of fear." He both enjoyed the scent and detested it, it was always about context. 

"I don't think I want to fall in love again. It's too painful. I would have liked to have had children though, I think I could have been a good mother." She might as well let everything out now that it's was spilling out anyway. 

"You could still have children. I was the result of such. My father needed an heir and my mother needed one for her pack as well. They came to an agreement." 

"I know it's hard for you to resist my sexual charm but don't go getting any ideas." She was laughing, he felt more at ease with her coming back to herself. Her eyes still held the same sadness, but were brighter. 

"I will try to control myself." He smiled at her and she giggled. They continued talking of random things til Kai eventually fell asleep in his bed. It felt natural and real, a friendship that would last. He couldn't recall ever having a friendship like this one. 

....


	10. Baby Names

"Wake up, little human." Peering down at the woman sprawled out on her stomach, trying to wake her.

"No." Groaning and pulling the covers up over her head Kai tried to ignore him. "And I'm not little."

"We have things to do today." Rin was to go visit inuyasha and the others, he always took her himself. She requested Kai come along and meet everyone. 

"My plans include sleeping longer." Not really a morning person, she was not about to make this easy on him. 

"Rin will be disappointed if you do not join us." He had begun dressing already and bent down and tugged the blankets off her head exposing her to the damning sunlight.

"Is that today?" Finally opening her eyes and rolling over to see a bare chested Sesshoumaru. Brain function depleting, he really hides a lot under those clothes. 

"Yes. You should prepare for the journey." Slipping on his inner kimono and tying it shut. She may have been a widow but she wasn't dead, she nearly whined. 

"I already did, I just have to grab my bag and get dressed. Do you have stripes on your legs too?" Oh Kami no, she did not just say that out loud. She turned a shade of pink before hopping up and grabbing her blasted ball and exiting as fast as possible. Of course she checked her shoulder on the frame of the door, graceful as always. He just chuckled as he watched the scene unfold, she was more fun in the morning.

.....

"Got everything, Rin? I'm excited to meet everyone, to be able to put a face to the stories you tell me." Kai packed two balls of yarn, a dark purple and sage green, along with the hook she made into the orb's tank top bag. 

"I think so. I have gifts for all the kids too, I found little carved animals made of wood at the marketplace yesterday. Aki thought the kids would enjoy them too." Sweet as ever, Kai knew she most likely brought gifts for the children every time she went. 

"Well, I'm ready too. Let's go." They met up with Jaken, Sesshoumaru and Ah-Un outside of the marketplace walls. Rin began strapping the two bags to Ah-Un as she had done many times before. 

Coming up behind Kai, Sesshoumaru bent down to whisper in her ear "hips, thighs, ankles" before walking off to speak with Rin. Oh that's great, just wonderful. It's official he was an ass. 

After a brief moment regaining herself, she joined them. "I've never ridden a dragon before. This is going to be so much fun!" 

Sesshoumaru grabbed Rin's hips and set her atop the large two headed dragon. He moved toward Kai to help her up in the same fashion and was stopped by her.

"I can do this on my own." She first tried to jump and swing a leg over to no avail. Her second attempt she tried to run and jump on belly first only to be reminded she never could jump high. Third attempt she was intercepted and placed behind Rin. "I could have done it."

"We should leave before dark." Taking to the sky above not looking back to see the scowl upon her face. He may have just found a new hobby in teasing her, it was fun.

....

When nightfall was nearing they landed in a clearing near the forest. They were to stay the night there and fly a bit the next day, arriving before midday. It was a fun new challenge to eat while holding onto a flying dragon, an enjoyable one. 

"How is his hair still perfect after flying all day? That certainly isn't fair." Grumbling as she attempted to smooth her wild wind blown hair, giving up and piling it on top of her head. 

Rin shrugged, she had never really given it much thought. It was just how he was. The women began to put a little camp together while Sesshoumaru did some sort of magic trick started a fire. Determined to know all his secrets one day, she made a mental note to ask when less tired. She sat on the pile of blankets and yawned, flying sure wore her out.

"It would be awesome if we had stuff to make s'mores. It's a perfect night for it." It was her favorite camping treat, she missed it.

"What's a snores?" Perplexed at what Kai was talking about Rin asked.

"S'mores. It's a treat. Made with gram crackers, chocolate bars and marshmallows. It's so good. I don't think those things are to be invented for like ever." Maybe she would have them again one day, she very well may have the time. 

"Oh, sounds interesting." Giggling she added "if I knew what those were." Both laughed and pulled out more food, chatting while they ate about who was who so Kai could guess what name belonged to what person. Sesshoumaru joined in here and there, making her realize he spoke more freely when away from everyone.

"It is time for little humans to sleep." Rin immediately laid down and covered up while he stared at Kai.

"What? I'm not a little human." Rin giggled as Kai yawned. "Besides I'm not a bit tired." Smug look in place she stared back.

"Your scent betrays your words." Met with an equally smug look.

"Oh holy hell. You can scent that kind of stuff? What else can you scent?" She needed to know the answer to this. 

"Many things. Now sleep little human. We have an early day ahead of us." So he wanted to keep his secrets, fine by her... for now. 

"I'm not little, fluffy." She laid down and curled up. "And I'm only going to sleep because I want to, not because you told me to." Closing her eyes she began to drift off to sleep.

"Hn" perhaps he hadn't noticed before or tried not to but now he could see how much Rin had grown. It was true, she was becoming a young woman and it was much faster than he had anticipated. Knowing humans grew and aged quickly was one thing but seeing it was another. 

Never having thought more about it, she would grow and age at this quickened pace until finally dying at such a young age, for a youkai. Unless, she mated a youkai man. Unable to decide which thought disturbed him more, her dying of old age or mating he dismissed his thoughts and turned his gaze to the woman.

An innocent beauty about her and a way of looking at the world with wonderment, she was a unique woman. She was older than she looked and wiser than how she spoke. If she so chose, she could easily find a mate. Would she stay or leave if she did? Did she have loyalty to him or to a future mate if she decided that's what she wanted? He could easily end up alone again, why did the very thought of that trouble him? 

Deciding to stop troubling himself with such thoughts he took to going over things that involved his duties to the west while they slept. Keeping a sharp eye out for trouble that would never come. 

....

 

"Wake up Kai! Today is the day you get to meet everyone!" How can someone be this cheery this early?

"I love you Rin but Kami I'm gonna need a ten minute buffer between waking up and you're cheeriness sweetie" she sat up and rubbed her face not realizing she was being stared at by a gawking Rin and a slightly wide eyed Sesshoumaru.

"You, you love me?" Quiet and cautious as if she was speaking to Kata, afraid she'd take it back or run.

"Of course I do. I didn't think it was a secret." Finding herself suddenly plastered to the ground on her back in a vicious hug from Rin, she noted to not tell her things until she was well awake. 

"Oh Kai! I love you too." Laughing Kai couldn't help but be happy. It felt nice to hear the words even if she already knew. Looking over to Sesshoumaru he seemed to take the hint.

"It is time to get moving. Come Rin." They all packed up camp and took again to the skies. Arriving just before midday like they had planned and began to walk into the small village after landing just outside.

"Oy, bastard! See you brought the pup finally." He had to be Inuyasha, nearly identical except markings and ears to Sesshoumaru. 

"We arrived as expected, half breed." The same bored tone and expression as when she first met him.

"Keh. How are you Rin? Everyone is inside eating if you want to go join them." Rin bounded away as fast as she could to the nearby home. Turning to Kai. "You must be Kai, Rin had written about you. Kagome is anxious to meet you too, go on in." 

"Okay, Inuyasha, I assume. You boys sure look like your dad, ya know. Though I think you act more like him." Leaving a confused hanyou with his brother she walked into the home.

"How does she know anything about the old man?" Perhaps Rin left a few things out in her letters.

"She has spoken with him." Elaborate as always but maybe less so just to annoy Inuyasha. 

"How? He's dead or have you forgotten?" Always quick to anger at things he didnt understand. 

"She is a prophetess, bound to the Orb of Souls. Perhaps you should speak to her yourself." Let her deal with the questions, may prove to be interesting to watch. 

"Keh." Bastard wouldn't answer any questions she sure as hell better. 

......

So many new faces it was a little overwhelming. Kai had met Inuyasha, his wife Kagome, their two year old son Maceo and one year old daughter Sachi and Kaede the elder woman during the afternoon meal. 

Afterward meeting Songo and her husband Miroku, five year old twin girls Paola and Parisa, four year old son Dairoku and three year old Hiroki. Shippou was off at kitsune school learning better fox magic, and she was little disappointed she didn't get to meet him as well though. 

Everyone sat underneath the sacred tree while the children ran around in the field being chased by Rin in a game of tag. 

"I am told congratulations are due on your next pup." Sesshoumaru nodded towards a stunned Kagome. 

"Kagome?!" Inuyasha's head snapped toward her.

"I wasn't entirely sure yet, I'm only a few days late after all." A shy smile towards her husband as he picked her up and spun her around. A beautiful sight to have seen.

"That's great Kagome." Putting her down as she stole a kiss. A sharp pain to Kai's heart watching something so wonderful unfold knowing what she lost, though never faltering in her sincere smile. Sesshoumaru glanced over toward her without tilting his head, unnoticed to her. 

"Oh Kagome! I'm so happy for you. It's so great having more children around." Her friend embraced her with the happy news. 

"My dear Songo, if you wanted more children, I would be more than willing to oblige." Did he just rub her butt in front of everyone? Why are they acting like that's normal?

"You will do no such thing, monk. I've given you four and that's enough." Kagome and Songo burst into laughter at Miroku's obviously fake frown. Kai was missing something only long time friends got.

"How'd you know, Sesshoumaru?" Kagome finally asked after everyone seemed to begin to calm down.

"My father told us." He's not gonna answer anything is he?

"What?" Obviously confused, he had died over two hundred years ago. 

"He was saying the same crap earlier. About how Kai can speak with him through an orb or something." Inuyasha chimed in and everyone stared at Kai including the fluffy bastard himself.

"Ah, okay. Where do I start? I fell off a mountain, through a time portal I'm guessing, crashed into a flying Sesshoumaru, went wandering around, touched a glowing orb, I do not recommend by the way, became a miko of souls and can talk to spirits.... yeah that seems like everything." Why won't they stop staring at me like that? Maybe it was because she was around his brother so much but she could tell Inuyasha wanted to ask about his father but wouldn't. She would try to ask when there were less people.

"Oh, so you're from my time too? We have so much to talk about!" It seemed like she was being given an out and she was gonna take it. 

"Sounds great." Taking Kagome's outreached hand, they walked off back towards the village with Songo as well. 

"Do you think" inuyasha paused and shifted on his feet. "Do you think she would do that thing so I can talk to him too?" 

"Ask her yourself." After seeing his face fall just a fraction before turning into a scowl, he added "she has a kind heart, I am inclined to think she would."

"Keh. Thanks." The men stood around and spoke of the newly baking pup while watching the children play. Miroku even mentioned the idea of impregnating Songo again until Inuyasha reminded him of Songo's temper during pregnancy. He rethought his stance on the matter rather quickly.

.....

The women sat and talked for a while and Kai enjoyed making fast friends with them.

"What's Kai short for? I need to start thinking of names now, Inuyasha is no help." She giggled while sipping her tea.

"Kaiya actually. It means forgiving though I always have just gone by Kai, so maybe it just mean for." Laughing at her own joke she snorted a bit which made her laugh harder and the other two as well. 

"I want to know how it is living with the prince of ice." Songo chimed in. 

"Prince of Ice? Kami don't tell me that's a real title. He's really not as cold as people think he is. He has a small sense of humor which currently entails making fun of me. He is thoughtful, reliable, a good father to Rin and pleasant to be around. I like living with them." The two women looked at each other and back at her as if she turned rainbow colored. "What?"

"Just surprised is all. We always knew he was a good father to Rin and he spoils the children too. Always sending gifts for them. Are you two, ya know, together?" She knew he had a soft side not just a literally soft side. 

"Oh no, not at all. I do think we are friends. I'm not looking to fall in love with anyone honestly." Oh crap, should have left that last part off. Stupid mouth.

"Why not? You're young, you shouldn't write off love. It's an amazing thing to have." Oh the words of a woman in love, sweet and sharp.

Sighing, she knew it would come out eventually. Might as well fess up. She didn't want to but at least once they had the pity in their eyes she would only have to endure it for a few more hours before leaving. 

"I am actually a widow. I married when I was twenty and he passed away in war when I was twenty four. That was two years ago last January. His name was Takeo, we did not have any children and yes I loved him very much. Yes I am okay with it the best I can be and I am alright with not falling in love again. It's just the hand life has dealt me. I don't normally talk about it and only told Sesshoumaru the other night, Rin doesn't know and I'd like to keep it that way for now until I can find the right time to talk to her about it." She stared down at her tea cup and fidgeted with it waiting for their responses, hoping it wasn't too bad.

"I am so sorry for your loss, Kai." Kagome leaned over and hugged her. 

"I am as well. I know loss is never easy. I've lost my entire village including my father, which I know isn't the same but I sympathize with you." Those were nice words, to be sympathized with. It hurt her to know that anyone as sweet as Songo could feel such pain. Instantly wishing she could give her back what she lost. She was grateful to know there wasn't any pity from her. 

"Thank you. Both of you. Now, we were talking baby names?" All three woman giggled and began to sort through the dozens of names they knew and talked of the children including Rin's morning revelation. Soon it was time for Kai and Sesshoumaru to depart. 

Everyone was saying their goodbyes and Kai stood near Inuyasha. She had wanted to talk with him in private but hadn't gotten the chance. She leaned over knowing he had better hearing, from Kagome's stories, and whispered "if you ever want to talk to your father, just come up to the castle. Anytime and I'll make the link. You don't even have to say anything now or then, just show up." He simply nodded, avoiding looking at her. She knew then how much it meant to him.

They began walking down the road out of the village. "Hey Fluffy, you think you could transform and I could ride on your back?" 

In the distance she heard booming laughter from Inuyasha and him yell "yeah Fluffy! let her ride you all the way back!" 

"I'm guessing he may have heard me and you stare at me all you want, I won't burst into flames." She knew how sibling rivalry was and felt a tiny bit of guilt but really not enough. 

"Hn." He took his eyes off her and stared forward again. 

Scrunched up nose and a big smile on her face. "So I'm guessing that's a no?"


	11. I love you to the moon and back

CHAPTER 11: I love you to the moon and back

Five days had passed since they arrived back at the castle. Having much more time on her hands, Kai had completed a crocheted bag for the orb. It was beautiful. She used the dark egg plant purple as the entire bag and crocheting a cherry tree with soft pink flowers and sage green leaves. Rather proud of herself, she planned on showing Sesshoumaru when they met later in the evening.

"Take this thing and do something with it. It is interfering with my duties, human." Why does he have to squawk so loudly? Jaken held Kata by the scruff dangling her out towards Kai.

"I'm not taking her. I've told you everyday this week, I am allergic. I cannot touch the" sneezing and taking a deep breath she finished. "Cat. Just go take Kata to Sesshoumaru, let him handle it. I told him to let her take the cat in the first place." She stood up off the floor of her room looking over jaken.

"I couldn't possible let this creature bother our lord!" He shook the cat for dramatic effect, causing Kata to claw his hand. "Stupid cat"

"Don't be mean to her. Now go and I swear you bring her in here again I'll cut you." She got close to the kitten "and you little girl, I hope you have a good day" making kissy noises at her.

"Humans, no respect for their elders!" Stomping off and leaving the doors open. Kai just rolled her eyes.

Nothing more to do she went over and flopped down on her futon. Maybe a nap would be in order. 

"She can't hear us, why can't she hear us?" A woman's voice, soft almost whispering just above.

"Give it time. You're always afraid something is wrong" another woman, huskier voice but not louder.

"Uh hello?" Sitting up and looking around to see nobody. She stood, walking to the open door and peeked down the hall both ways to see again, no one. 

"See, you were worried about nothing." Louder now. 

"Okay, come out now. I don't see anyone but I sure as hell can hear you" starting to get pissed off that someone was spying on her. 

"Oh calm down, will ya? We heard there was a miko of souls here and came to you. Maybe she's stupid?" It was the huskier voice again.

"Mei, you shouldn't say such things. Hello there. My name is Asumi. We are spirits that haven't found our rest yet and came to you for help." In the doorway Kai stood staring at the empty room before her. Across the room two figures slowly came into form slightly transparent.

"I can see you now. How strange, I have only seen a spirit while holding the orb. What can I do to help you two?" Walking closer to talk to the spirit women.

"I had fallen into the frozen river last winter, Mei tried to save me and we were lost. We would like to tell our father we are alright now. He still searches for us, our bodies flowed down the river and were buried by dirt and debris. He doesn't know what happened and we just can't let him live like that anymore." Asumi dressed in a light pink kimono lowered her head and began to weep, Mei in orange wrapped her arm around her shoulder.

"I will do it. Where is he? Will you take me to him?" Eager to help the women she was ready.

"We are from the northern lands just beyond the border. It is a full day from here, you will need to pack for it." Asumi answered "and we are grateful."

"Oh, I didn't realize you came from so far. I'll have to prepare and tell Sesshoumaru so he knows where I am. We will leave in the morning, just meet me back here then." Smiling at the women and seeing there relief in their eyes was worth what she was going to have to do, to tell a father his daughters have passed. Taking all hope from him that she knew he desperately held onto.

"Thank you so much, Miko. We can never repay your kindness." Asumi whispered as they faded away, as if they were never there. 

Wondering if that's what Botan the healer meant about needing something to sleep at night, she began to pack up things she would need before heading to the kitchen to get some traveling food. She hoped they had some more of that deer jerky, it was really good. 

.....

Sun setting as they ate their meal outside on a blanket, at Kai's request, Sesshoumaru turned the bag over to look at her craftsmanship.

"It is well made. You have done well making it." Setting it back down near Kai and returning to eat.

"Thanks. Also learned a new trick today. I can now see and speak with spirits without touching the orb. I guess it just took a bit to get the connection or something, I really don't know." Stuffing another rice ball in her mouth "and I also have something to tell you too" 

"Swallow your food before speaking." As if he were scolding a child.

"Sorry, I'm just excited. These two sisters came to me, they're from the northern lands just beyond your border. They heard I was here and asked me to go to their father and give them the news of their deaths. They drowned and the bodies were swept away so he still looks for them. Asumi and Mei can't rest until they know he will be alright." Never looking up, she continued to eat. She had forgotten to eat something during the day from all of the excitement and was so hungry.

"It is a full days walk from here to that village. Are you sure you are capable of not getting into trouble?" Humans were so fragile, she managed barely on her own the first time but she hadn't encountered other humans. They could easily be more deadly than any youkai. 

"Yes I can handle it. It's not that far really and I'll just see if they have an Inn or something and stay the night there." Slightly irritated at the thought, she wasn't that prone to trouble.

"You are a female and at the time of your bleeding. It is much more dangerous for you to go now. Perhaps you should wait." Did he just really? She wasn't sure what part of his statement she was more angry about.

"Ya know what, you ass? A woman is just as capable as a man is. Also my bleeding? Really? Kami, don't ever bring it up again. It's a private thing." Why was she angry? He was just stating facts. He began to think she didn't understand the world as well as she should. Especially if she wished to travel alone.

"I know women are capable. You, however, are not. You cannot yield a weapon to protect yourself. Your bleeding should be mentioned because of the implications it will have on youkai. Lesser ones are known to take bleeding women, seeing it as a sign they are good for breeding. This world is a dangerous one." Well, okay maybe he had a point. She was still pissed off at him though. 

"Just give me a dagger or something. I don't know. I have to do this and I am going to do this. If I die or get kidnapped in the process than so be it." Staring him directly in the eyes to sear in her point.

"If you insist on going, I will accompany you." Not at all pleased with her defiance, Sesshoumaru also couldn't allow her to go without protection. Knowing very well she would leave either way, with or without him.

"Only if I get to ride on you transformed." Sure she was trying to make him say no and let her go alone as planned. Sesshoumaru knew this but he was also sure it would give him enjoyment to annoy her with his presence for two days.

"I agree to your terms" he continued to eat some strawberries as she stared in anger.

"You must really think I'm helpless by myself then. Or maybe you plan to annoy me the whole time. Either way, fine." She was on to his games but elated she was finally getting what she wanted. Reaching over she took the strawberry out of his chopsticks after he and shoved it in her mouth.

"Now, about your bleeding time. Why is it private? Anyone here can smell the blood." Maybe she could make him bust into flames if she stares hard enough.

"Because it's fucking private. It's coming from my private parts so it's private, as in we don't talk about and don't smell it. Kami, just don't." Everyone can smell it? Was the smell of blood that powerful? She growled an irritated human growl only a frustrated female could give. He laughed enjoying her anger.

"It is a natural thing signaling your breeding status. It is nothing to be ashamed of." Why does he have to make sense? Whatever, screw him for just being an ass anyway. 

"Can we please just not ever talk about this? Anyway, I also have a request. I'd like to have a small box. some things I have, I want to put away. They're special to me but really it's time to put them away." Anger eased and her voice softer.

"You wish to put away the rings you wear." More of a statement like always.

"Yes, they signify my marriage. Most put them away after a year but I haven't been ready. I think with a new life here it is time. I'll never forget him though. I also have a picture that needs to be put in there. I've kept it in my hoodie pocket for a while now and I don't want it to get ruined." Stealing the whole bowl of strawberries and settling them in her lap.

"I understand." Did he really? Could he ever understand? "May I see this picture? Kagome explained to me about them and has shown me hers of her family. She often takes pictures of her life here to take back through the well."

Stunned into silence she didn't know what really to say. Kai had no idea Kagome could still go back through. They got off track and started talking about the new baby when she got to the part about her going back through to Inuyasha.

"Uh, yeah. I'll show you when we go inside." More to the bowl of fruit than to him. 

"Let's go inside. It's getting colder in the nights, fragile humans can get sick." Standing he reached out his hand. She accepted and stood herself releasing it quickly.

"I know that." She laughed "after all, I've been human my whole life." Walking back after Kai gathered up everything while he insisted they leave it for the servants. Settling for neatly folding the blanket and stacking the dishes.

Arriving at her room she slid open the doors coming to the wooden chest beside the vanity that held her clothing. She opened the first drawer pulling out the photograph from underneath her hoodie.

"This is Takeo. Even in death he holds my heart." Staring down at the photograph of her lost love. Sadness overtaking her scent but a soft smile upon her face. She held it out and he took it from her fingertips.

Looking at it he could saw Takeo. A tall man in a military uniform staring back at him with a smirk on his face. He had dark black hair, cut short. Dark brown eyes that held love and kindness.

"He was really a good man. I took that the day he deployed." A silent fell from her eye. "It's the last time I saw him. Takeo told me he loved me to the moon and back, that's when I snapped the picture. I'll never forget that moment even after the picture fades away into nothing." Taking a deep breath she took it back as he held it out and put it away in its secret spot. 

Reaching out he wiped away her tear holding her cheek as he spoke "your heart is a great one. Do not close it off, you deserve happiness again." Meaning what he said, he dropped his hand away from her face.

"Thank you. For this, for everything. I don't think I'll ever understand why you have gone through all of this. You could easily have locked me up somewhere to get me to do what you want. Instead you've made me pack and given me a family with you and Rin." Breathing deep once again she hugged him knocking her head on his chin. "You are dangerous even to hug, geez." She laughed 

"It is you who is at fault." Embracing her back and let her take her time. Sesshoumaru had learned from Rin humans seemed to need contact to sooth their emotions. 

"Okay maybe. I would kill for some chocolate right about now." Releasing and bending down the the chest again pulling out her sleeping shirt. Aki had liked the new challenge of Kai's request for certain things. She had made her a large cotton sleeping shirt that was similar to a T-shirt, she had made serval items for Kai.

"Sleep, Kai. You have spirits to appease tomorrow." He turned and left her room, closing the doors behind him.

Dressing quickly and curling up on her futon thoughts wandered into her head. Was he ever this kind to anyone but Rin? Did he ever have anyone to love? He said he understood but did he really, had he lost someone like she had? Drifting off to sleep with more questions about the mysterious youaki who, to her, was becoming more like the guardian angel she first thought he was.

.....

After walking for half the day Kai was feeling irritated. Her hormones were running wild, she hurt and felt just all around awful. What Kai really wanted was to curl up in a ball with a heating pad, chocolate and an iPad. But no, those didn't exist. She was in a very much fuck everything mood.

"Is everything alright Kai?" Asumi was a kind soul, she seemed to care greatly about things. 

"Yes, it's just my woman time of the month. I'm a little cranky is all." Catching Sesshoumaru's eye. Knowing she probably looked bonkers talking to air.

"Oh, I apologize for us having you do this in this time." She looked down and Kai felt a pang of guilt.

"Don't be sorry. It's not a big deal. Really, I'm alright." She smiled at her and kept walking on. 

Stopping Sesshoumaru transformed into his large dog form. Laying down for her to climb on. Squealing in delight she scrambled on pulling at his fur for grip. 

"Geez you're huge! I am so excited!" She held on to his fur with one hand and the other point straight forward "Lord Fluffy, let's ride!" Quickly gripping with both hands as he leapt forward growling at being called fluffy. She knew he was still in denial about it. 

He ran fast and hard feeling her small form grip his neck, the wind ruffling through his fur. The whole experience wasn't as bad as he first thought. When the village came into view he thought to have a little fun. Taking to the sky straight up. He transformed and let Kai fall with a shocked cry before catching her and settling her down. 

"That was amazing, Sesshoumaru. Thank you so much!" Out of breath and laughing she straightened herself out. Pulling the orb from being flung over her back to the side like a messenger bag. Half listening to his "Hn."

"He is this way. Our father's name is Joji." Mei and Asumi walked into the heart of the village. Kai didn't miss the looks Sesshoumaru was given nor the whispers that weren't nice of a youkai being there. Was humans and Youkai really so separated?

Coming to a home the sisters stopped. It was time, the time she dreaded. A man with gray hair stood out front laying a futon over a clothes line. He was older maybe fifty or so, eyes worn with age, a deep violet. 

"Um, hello. Are you Joji? I'm Kai." Sesshoumaru nudged her arm with his hand. "Oh, uh a miko of souls." The man walked closer to her and stared with dread. He knew, didn't he?

"My daughters are dead, aren't they? Everyone told me to give up. To stop searching and accept it. I just couldn't, I couldn't lose that hope. Please, please don't take that hope from me." Her heart broke and her stomach twisted. 

Kai took out the orb and concentrated on the sisters, glowing and beating to her heartbeat, he eyes black and bright violet. She released one hand and balanced the orb with the other. "Take my hand Joji" 

"No, please no. I can't accept this." His eyes flooded with tears, his voice shaking and pleading. 

"Take my hand, Joji." She waited as he slowly took her hand in his while tears streamed down his face. 

"Oh father, please don't cry. Everything is alright." He fell to his knees and Kai kneeled down with him. Asumi wrapped her arms around him followed by Mei. 

"I searched for you. I'm so sorry, I tried I tried to find you." Joji felt them, could hear their voices again. 

"Asumi fell into the frozen river. I tried to save her and failed. I failed you and her father, it was never you." Mei smoothed her fathers hair trying to calm him.

"Life has a way of taking the young. Never truly a reason. It was nobody's fault here. Take this time and speak to each other, say goodbye and move on to the next life." Kai's voice was soothing and sweet. The old man nodded held his girls tighter. 

After the three said their good byes and the women moved on it was well into the night. It ended rather pleasant. To hear about their lives together, to talk about the happiness they shared. Kai kept quiet and listened, never once rushing the last encounter this family would have. Asumi said she could see her mother as she faded away, joji was finally at peace and could move on with his life. 

.....

Settling in the Inn was a bit uncomfortable. Even though Sesshoumaru held the status of the Lord of the West, he was still met with apprehension and fear from every human they encountered. Ending up with only one room to share being there was a autumn festival in the large village that many came to every year. It was to welcome in the autumn weather and harvest time. 

Sesshoumaru sat at the low table in the room drinking tea like he did every night. Kai needed to get undressed. She didn't really enjoy wearing a kimono and was eager to get into her night shirt. This one was made of silk, deep red and fell down to her knees. Aki had outdone herself with the beautiful art work of which trees with little birds sitting here and there on the bare branches. The sleeves fell below her fingertips and had little orange leaves on the edges.

"Do you think I did alright tonight?" She started to undress not really caring if he was there or not. Though was slightly awkward. The outer kimono fell to the floor with her obi. 

"You did well. I believe you have given the man peace as well as the sisters." Sending her discomfort he turned away.

"Good. That's really what I wanted." Untying the inner kimono and letting it fall as well. She quickly pulled the nightgown over her head.

"Do you wish to see the festival tomorrow?" Sesshoumaru thought she would enjoy a reward of sorts after such a long day.

"Um, really? It's sounds nice but I kinda just want to go home." She was beginning to feel edgy around the villagers, they seemed prejudice against Sesshoumaru. Plus she wanted a long, long nap. Bending down to fold her clothing and put them in the small bag she had brought. She pulled out a piece of the deer jerky she snagged.

"Are you alright? You are not one to pass on such a thing." She called it home, feeling joy at knowing she was consider it such. Rarely he felt such an emotion. She bit off a piece and chewed making sure to swallow before answering.

"Yeah. Just tired mostly plus, I... I don't like how they act around you. It pisses me off. I don't care to go smacking people for being an asshole to you, ya know?" Coming over to sit across from him and pour some tea. "People can be real jerks. Are youkai and humans not friendly to each other or something?"

"Humans fear us, they do not understand. Lessers are also a problem, they are violent and more feral. We tend to avoid humans because they are of no interest to us. Dying easily and quickly, even of old age. Just not worth the effort." An honest answer at least if not somewhat insulting.

"Do you not like humans?" A legitimate question given the answer he just gave. 

"I am unsure how to answer. I did not care for them before Rin. I even had a misguided hate after my father died for a human and my brother. I have overcome those feelings but I cannot say I like humans. They are too destructive and irrational. I would rather not interact with them." Sesshoumaru could hear the humans talking down the hall. They seemed less than pleased a youkai and miko sharing a room for the night.

"I suppose I can understand that. Am I a burden to you? Because I am human?" Not that it really mattered too much of the answer, she had already promised to serve the west. She wouldn't leave.

"Having you and Rin is a bit troublesome to some of the youkai. However, they respect my judgment in the matter. I do not consider you nor Rin a burden." Relived she smiled and poured some more tea. 

"That's good then. I'm gonna go to sleep, that really drained me tonight. Are you going to sleep with me?" Her face turned beet red she stammered "uh I mean, share the futon. Kami I don't know how to ask this right at all." She buried her face in her hands as he chuckled at her embarrassment.

"No. I will not sleep tonight. There may be some trouble with me being here. I will keep watch, sleep little human." He nodded to her and waited for her to go to the futon and sleep.

"Trouble? What kind of trouble?" Why did he still expect her to do what he asked?

"The villagers seem to be under the impression we are mates and that in itself is dangerous. Inuyahsa's mother was killed for bearing a hanyou child. They may try to kidnap you or kill you." No fear but anger coming from her.

"What the fuck is wrong with people? Now I really get why you don't like humans much. Should we just leave tonight?" A smirk across his face.

"I can handle any human. Now sleep and we will return in the morning." She stood and walked over to the bedding and crawled under the covers.

"Alright. Wake me if you need me though, okay?" She laid her head down and closed her eyes. "Thanks for coming with me, it's nice not having to be alone." She drifted off to sleep quickly.

....

Morning came and what was quickly becoming a favorite thing of Sesshoumaru's he went to wake Kai.

"Little human, awaken." He kneeled down next to her curled up in a ball buried in the covers all but her face.

After she did not stir he touched her shoulder causing an unexpected punch to the face. Maybe this wasn't as fun anymore, it of course didn't hurt him. She still slept on.

Standing and moving to her feet he grabbed the covers and pulled them off. Finally awake Kai sat up and rubbed her face. "What did you do that for?" 

"You hit me in the face. It seemed fair trade." Staring down at her as he released the blanket.

"I'm sorry. Are you alright or did this little human hurt you?" She giggled and grabbed the blanket rolling back up in them.

"Do not go back to sleep, it is time to leave." The villagers conversations were growing more violent and it was best to leave early to avoid altercation.

"No, it's the butt crack of dawn. So unless you intend on carrying me out of here in my night clothes, it's not happening." She pulled the covers over her head. 

"Very well." He tugged off the covers once again, grabbed her bag and orb and threw Kai over his shoulder. 

"Are you fucking kidding me? Put me down, I'm not dressed and my ass is hanging out!" Angry and slightly embarrassed.

"This was your terms and I agreed. We are leaving." He pulled her nightgown down further to cover her thighs out of curtesy and walked out of the room. 

"This is going to be a long ass day for you." Resigned to her position she just dangled while wondering if she could go back to sleep. Leaving the Inn, he leapt up towards the clouds. 

Landing in the large field Sesshoumaru put her down, handing her the bag and orb. "You may dress if you wish."

"Oh thank you so very much my Lord, whatever would I have done without your guidance" she was irritated. Looking around and seeing no place for privacy, even more so. "And where do you suggest I do this?"

"Here. I will turn around if it helps you dress faster." She may be angry at him but he stood by his actions. If he could help it, Sesshoumaru would protect her from having to deal with such prejudice. 

Growling at him she whirled around and dug through her bag to find her clothing. A light green inner and a forest green outer set with a chocolate obi. The outer kimono had a forest stitched on the sleeves. 

She stripped down to nothing but her undies, too angry to care who saw at that point. Quickly dressing and re packing the small bag, flinging the orb's bag handle over her head and fixing it to sit on her hip. Turing around to see evil Fluffy staring at her, waiting.

"Did you just watch me dress? Seriously?" She swore by every Kami she knew, if he did she would kill him.

"No. That is beneath me." Was he saying looking at her was beneath him now? Ugh, these hormones were killing her. 

"Whatever. Let's just go. Fly me this time, please. Also, why didn't we fly in the first place? I'm sure we would have gotten there faster." She walked over closer to him preparing herself for what she knew would be a fast flight up.

"You wished to walk." He leapt up again grabbing her by the waist holding her to his side. 

"Well, uh, crap. Okay." At least she got to ride on a giant fluffy demon dog. That was the best part of the whole trip.

Flying quickly to return as fast as possible, Sesshoumaru felt her lay her head on his arm. Peering down with his golden eyes to see hers shut. She was falling asleep. Picking up her legs and cradling her, she snuggled his fluffy mokomoko and smiled. The experience using the orb must have worn her out much more than she let on. 

He never woke her when they arrived, gently tucking her into her bedding. Unhooking his mokomoko and lying it next her, she snuggled even further. 

......

Sleeping for three days, only to be awake long enough to use the bathroom and eat. Kai awoke on the fourth feeling revitalized. 

Having no idea how much time had really passed, thinking it was only yesterday they were on their way back. Bathing and dressing after eating a big ole breakfast she grabbed mokomoko and set on finding Sesshoumaru.

Easily found in his library working on affairs of the west. She sat next to him at the low table. "I brought you, your fluffy back. Thanks for letting me use it."

"Are you well?" She set mokomoko down and looked at him with confusion. Why would he ask that?

"Of course. Why wouldn't I be?" Was something going on she didn't know about?

"You have been sleeping and only awake for short periods of time to eat. For the last three days." Oh well, that could do it then.

"I'm kinda impressed on my sleeping skills. No wonder I feel so good." He still awaited an answer to his inquiry. "Yes, I am well. You really don't have to worry about me so much. I would also like to apologize for being cranky yesterday, I mean the other day." She placed her hand on his arm and smiled placing her hand back in her lap.

"While you were recovering, I took to having what you requested made." Standing and walking over to a bookcase, he grabbed a small box and returned by her side. Wonderfully made, a dark wooden box carved with small flowers painted in vibrant colors. one side looked to have rain falling upon them while the other the sun shone brightly. 

"Wow. This is... wow. Thank you." Her voice sounded small and almost lost. Kai didn't know what to say. 

"Aki also said she would like to see you when you feel up to it." She held the box gently in her hands afraid to drop it. 

"Okay, I would like to see her too. It's been a while since I have anyway. Uh, I'll see you for dinner, right?" He knew her terms by now and understood.

"I will see you then." Returning to his work Kai left and made her way back to her room. She placed the box on the vanity while she dig out the picture and placed it inside, looking at it for a moment before. 

The hardest part was letting her rings go. She had nothing left of him other than her rings and his photograph. Putting them away made it more real for her. Truly an acceptance that he was never coming for her. A deep breath as she slid them off her finger. 

Kissing them "I will never forget you Takeo. I love you to the moon and back." Placing them in the box and closing the lid she felt sadness deep within her and lighter. It was the right thing for her to move on, he would want that.


	12. It's NOT a date

Sitting near the campfire Kai was worn out from flying on Ah-Un and ready for sleep. The night air was cool and crisp in her lungs, the feeling of autumn settling in. 

"Were you born with those markings on your face or are they like freckles and came in when you were older?" Face glowing from firelight, hair falling down her shoulders nearly reaching the forest floor. He never realized how long her hair was and how soft it appeared.

"I was born with them. They are a sign of my breeding." Regal as always, she supposed his markings were just more proof of that. 

"Your dad's are blue and jagged. Did you get yours from your mom then?" Curious over the most insignificant of things.

"My mother has the same color of stripes however she has just one small jagged stripe underneath each eye. She shares the same moon as I." A cool breeze cut through the air, ruffling her hair, making her shiver. Without a thought Sesshoumaru grabbed her blanket and draped it over her shoulders. 

"Thanks." Pulling the blanket around her arms. "Why doesn't Inuyasha have any?" She needs to sleep. Clearly tired from the day's journey.

"Markings usually come from the mother. They can come from the father, though rarely. His mother was human and therefore had none to pass on." Leaning back against the large tree behind him, watching her face cycle through her thoughts.

"I wonder what I would look like if I was an Inu-Youkai. Would I have silver hair too? Golden eyes? Do all of you have them?" Beginning to ramble off random thoughts was the sign she was nearly asleep already. 

"Lie down and sleep. You are tired." As she slid under the rest of the covers and rested her head upon her arm he continued. Knowing she wouldn't sleep until he had answered her. "Inu come in various colors. Black is the most common, silver is down to just a few family lines. There are some who are multiple colors together as well." 

"So just like real dogs? Hm, that's neat." Yawning and burrowing further beneath the blankets. "Goodnight Fluffy." Eyes already closed as she drifted off to the dreaming world.Humans were such curious creatures. 

Hours passed and deciding to walk for a while waiting for daybreak, Sesshoumaru heard his name being called back in the direction of camp. Nothing more than a strained whisper.

Quickly seeing Kai come into view, her head bowed over the orb as she sat on her knees in the bedding. "Help me" he reached over to pull her hands off and instantly saw the vision.

Deep inside the earth, pools of magma inside Large caverns filled with creatures he had never seen before. Desperately hot and humid.

"Sire, we still have not found it. What should we do?" A small youkai, charcoal skin and midnight hair with eyes to match. He looked to be a shadow. The man he stood before was tall and slender, light grey skin, black hair and orange fiery eyes that held anger inside them.

"Continue searching. It will be mine or I will burn that wretched world for it." Words filled with disgust echoed off the walls. 

"Yes, of course. We will find it at any cost. I know of another place to search." The shadow man turned to his left and walked away stopping just a mere feet before them. Shifting his eyes in contemplation.

Blinking Sesshoumaru came out of the vision and pried her hands off the orb, letting it drop on the bedding. She was in great pain.

She was Shaking barely able to get a breath. he pulled Kai into his lap and held her. Hoping it would all subside soon. Eventually she stopped shaking and seemed to be able to breathe once more. 

"You came for me." Why did she seem surprised by his actions? 

"I will always come for you." That was true, wasn't it? Somehow he had gained another to protect. In The same way he gained Rin, Kai had pushed herself into his life.

"It hurts so much. It wouldn't stop so I tried to call out for you." She sighed a defeated tone in her voice. "I feel so weak for needing you to help me." Having been alone for so long, she had learned to depend on only herself. Needing nobody else to come save her. 

"Do not feel weak because of it." Moving to place her back on her bedding she stopped him, grabbing his kimono with both fists.

"Please, just hold me for a bit longer. It's like fire in my veins." Hiding her face from his view, never looking up. She felt ashamed asking. 

He pulled the blanket around her and moved to lean against the large tree once more. Holding her the rest of the night as she fitfully slept. neither commented on the nights events the next morning. It was easier not speaking about it for both involved. 

 

.....

"So how long until this baby is born? Is it the same 40wks for a half youkai baby, uh quarter youkai baby?" Kai bent down and picked up the basket of vegetables to bring over for the afternoon meal. 

"Well the other two were about seven months. So I think it'll be about five more months." Kagome began cutting the vegetables to put into the boiling pot. 

"Ugh, that's forever from now." Helping cut the carrots to be placed into the stew.

"Maybe for you. Soon I'll have a third little one running around. Inuyasha's children are such a handful!" Laughing loudly while dropping the ingredients into the large pot over the fire.

"I was thinking, if you're alright with it, of course. Before the baby is born, you could send the kids to us for a while so you can have a little break before the new one comes. But only if you're okay with that. I know how momma's can be." Kagome stopped and launched at Kai wrapping her in a big hug.

"Oh that is so nice of you! You really don't have to do that, kids are so rambunctious." She really is a nice woman, isn't she? Inuyasha got lucky with her.

"Really, think about it. I know I'd love to have them around and even though he wouldn't openly say anything, Sesshoumaru would too." Prying herself away from Kagome. She was still in pain and needed a less of an iron grip.

"Of course! Thank you, Kai. I really like your new bag. Did you make that yourself?" The women finished and sat next to each other waiting for the stew to finish.

"I did. I crochet as a hobby. It came in handy so I could finally ditch the tank top bag." Pulling the orb over and handing it to Kagome so she could see the work closer.

"It is absolutely beautiful. You'd make a fortune selling these at the markets." Handing it back and picking up a cup of water bringing it to her lips.

"I don't know, I'd rather make things for people I care about instead. I've already started making things for the kids for winter." 

"That's really sweet of you. I'm sure they'll love it." She looked tired, it must be exhausting being pregnant with two little ones running around already. "I hear Rin calling Sesshoumaru 'father' is thanks to you. I was hoping they'd come to that eventually but it seemed like it never would."

Inuyasha barged in through the front door and sat next to his wife and mate. "Oh yeah, do tell. That bastard seemed to never have the balls to have Rin call him that." Kagome elbowed him in the ribs playfully with an eyebrow raised.

"Actually it wasn't so much me. Your father told him she was holding back because she thought it would displease him. Later we talked and she asked if I thought it would be okay. I swear those two are so funny, they're really close and always thought of each other that way but didn't seem to want to break what they had by overstepping." It really had very little to do with her at least that's how she felt.

"It is really wonderful they found each other. The world can be so cruel." Kagome looked over the food. "I think the food is ready now. Inuyasha will you gather everyone?" Before he could stand, Kai jumped up.

"Stay, you just walked in." Smiling as she left to gather up everyone. She was greeted with Sesshoumaru play fighting the kids as Rin helped the kids "slay" him. She doubted anyone had seen such a side other than Rin. His laughter rang in her ears. 

She watched as Maceo hopped of Sesshoumaru's back and Sachi released his legs. The children looked as if they could be twins, certainly they were mini Inuaysha's. Matching hair, eyes and fuzzy ears. 

"Hey, Food is ready everyone!" Calling loudly. Golden eyes met deep blue, she smiled and turned as they all gathered inside to enjoy the meal.

Kai sat next to Rin and Sesshoumaru. Kagome came and handed her a cup of tea instead of passing it while she bent down and whispered in her ear "Inuyasha said you're in pain. This has herbs in it. It may make you a bit sleepy but will take most of the pain away." Kai nodded and smiled at the kind gesture. Nothing got by the Inu brothers, did it?

....

Saying their goodbyes and flying off, Kai was glad to be returning with Rin. She missed her a lot. Rin had a light about her that always brightened anyone's day.

That evening as they sat around the campfire listening to Rin go over the events of her stay, Sesshoumaru couldn't help but notice how right it felt. To hear the laughter of his little pack as they chatted away. 

"He did not! No way!" Barely catching her breath, snorting while she laughed. 

"He did! Kagome had to brush his hair for an hour to get all the tiny thorns out. That'll be the last time he goes chasing a rabbit into a thorn bush! he still caught the rabbit though!" Rin stood and walked over to her little nest of blankets. "I am so tired, I could sleep for a week!" Burying herself in nest and letting out a satisfied sigh. "Goodnight father, goodnight Kai."

"Goodnight sweetie. Sleep tight." Kai crawled over and swept the hair off Rin's face as she snuggled into the covers further.

"Goodnight, Rin. Sleep well." Sesshoumaru touched the top of her head and settled next to Kai curled up in a blanket staring at the fire.

"I don't think Rin will ever go through the rebellious stage. She's much too sweet of a child for that." Neither of them could see her being a rebellious person. 

"I believe so as well." Sitting with his legs crossed leaning on his forearms. A more relaxed posture for him. Soon reaching over for the tea pot and two cups.

"I told Kagome I want her to send the kids before the baby is born for a little break. Thought it would be nice for them and let them make sure everything is ready before he arrives." Pulling out some herbs from his sleeve, he placed them in one of the cups. Pouring tea over them. 

"That is acceptable. How do you know the pup is a male?" He handed her the cup and filled the other with just tea for himself. 

"I just have a feeling. Could be totally wrong though. What's in this?" Eyeing him suspiciously as she drank from it.

"Herbs from Kagome. She said you refused them." Great, everybody is all concerned. She didn't particularly like that kind of attention or any really.

"I'm fine." Maybe if she concentrated hard enough she could disappear. 

"There is no need to hide such things from me." Was that what she was doing? She hadn't really thought about it.

"I'd rather just deal with it myself and not have anyone fuss over me. Uh, thanks for the tea." She finished it quickly and soon was feeling extremely tired, he must have given her extra or she shouldn't have drank it so fast. She decided to blame him though. Feeling no pain and completely out of it she stumbled trying to find her bedding.

"Do you require assistance?" She waved him off, dismissing him while falling smack face first into the dirt after tripping over the blanket she was wrapped in.

"I'm fine." She muttered into the dirt beneath her. Residing to just sleep as is, she was surprised to feel herself lifted off the ground and placed in her bedding. 

"As you keep saying" he Tucked her in as he would a child, she was insulted but admitted it felt pretty good. She could see why kids liked it. Kai wanted to say thank you or curse him either one would have worked but she was nearly in her sleep comma and couldn't mutter a word. Drifting off as she felt a leaf being plucked out of her hair.

This human woman was a mess and seemed to find herself in such a state every time they left the castle. Finishing de-leafing her, he pulled the blankets up around her chin. Perhaps in a hundred years she would be a little more graceful, though he doubted such a miracle could occur. 

 

.......

Weeks passed and autumn turned to winter. 

"I really suck at this. I'm just downright horrible!" Aki had asked if Kai wished to learn to sew and began their weekly lessons. She thought it would be a good way to get to know each other better. 

"Let me see." She took the fabric from Kai and looked at the misshapen dress. "Ah, it is because you have begun to sew this piece on upside down." Handing it back as well as a pair of small scissors.

"Fucking stupid fabric." Sheepishly looking up "uh sorry." She began cutting the thread away to remove the piece.

"It's alright dear. I've lived long enough, I've heard worse." Chuckling while she went back to sipping her tea during her much needed break. "My son is coming to see me in a little while. Should be here any moment. Katsuo is a fine man and handsome too." 

"We've been over this, Aki. You are not getting grandchildren from me." Raising her eyebrow knowing she was up to something.

"I'm just stating facts, dear. If you so happen to like each other enough I get a few grandpups out of it, then so be it." That sealed it, she was up to something. 

"Don't I get a say in it mother?" Kai's eyes went wide and cheeks instantly pink from embarrassment. She didn't have the courage to look up at him.

"Oh Katsuo, if you would have chosen already I wouldn't have to try for you." Kissing her son's cheek as he sat next to her. 

"You are embarrassing this poor woman. Have some kindness." Kai finally peeked up from her work to see a very handsome man. Aki hadn't lied about that. Dark tanned skin, long black hair pulled up and emerald green eyes. "I am Katsuo, nice to meet you."

"I'm Kai." It was all she could muster to get out of her mouth. Even if it wasn't an awkward set up she would have had trouble. He was just as gorgeous as Sesshoumaru. Why had she just compared them? That was weird.

"You must be something if my mother has set this up, despite you being a human." There it was. He was just a jerk and that's why she had no grandchildren. Her eyes narrowed and lips pursed. 

"Well, it's been lovely, Aki. it's getting late." Standing as she folded her work and put it away. She began to walk away as she felt a hand grab hers. 

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean it that way." Turning to look into his eyes she saw kindness. 

"I must be going. So please release me." Her tone softened. Kai just wanted to leave.

"Please. Stay or at least let me spend time with you another day." It was strange to her that he would ask. 

"I'll still be human tomorrow too. However, if you insist, we can go for a walk tomorrow afternoon if that works for you." She had no interest in falling in love or really much of anything. Something about him made her want to agree though, so she did.

"Meet me here tomorrow afternoon." He released her hand as she walked away. Her heart pounding and head swirling with confusion. What the holy hell just happened?

Distracted by her musings walking up the steps to the castle doors she tripped and fell. Splitting open her lower lip upon meeting the ground beneath her. 

"Oh fuck me." She looked at her hand that was quickly filling with blood. After a quick check of her teeth using her tongue, relief flooded her realizing it was just a flesh wound. 

Barely noticing the guards as they opened the large doors she wandered to Botan in search of help.

"My my my. You're grace hitting you full force today, Kai?" He removed her hands to look at the damage done. "It does not require anything more than time to heal. Keep this on it to stop the bleeding." Placing a piece of cloth in her hand and raising it to her mouth. 

"That's a relief. I really don't care to have stitches." Holding her hand tighter over her lip he gave her a stern look. "What?"

"You really do need to be more careful. Humans are so delicate and don't heal quickly. Your life my be extended but you are still human and can easily die like one." She huffed with annoyance. Botan placed his hand on her cheek stroking with his thumb. "Please, just listen. This world needs you and you have to do what you can to stay alive to fulfill your duties." Pulling her hand away from her lip to see the bleeding had stopped. "You're all patched up. Now on you go, I believe it's time for the evening meal and I am famished." 

"Thanks, Botan. I'll try to be more careful just for you." She winked and turned to walk away smacking into the closed screen. "Okay starting now." Hearing his laughter as she wandered away slightly mortified.

......

"What happened to your face?" As graceful as she could, Kai took her place next to Sesshoumaru at the table. 

"Nothing, I've always looked this good." Trying to smile and failing from the pain but managed a good enough smirk.

"You know very well what I mean." Golden eyes staring with concern? Maybe annoyance? She wasn't really sure.

"I had a battle with the steps outside and lost. You don't have to give me the whole 'humans are fragile' speech again. Botan already did when I saw him." Grabbing her bowl of rice and gently stuffing it in her face.

"I see. Care to tell me why you smell of my first in command?" The day is sure going great now. It would be so much better if Rin wasn't staying the night with her friend.

"Oh, Katsuo? I met him today at Aki's. He insulted my human-ness and so I tried to leave. He grabbed my hand, end of story. Your nose is too strong, I've washed my hands... and bled all over them." What exactly was he accusing her of anyways, it wasn't like she was making out with the guy.

"Will you see him again?" What was this? Wouldn't he be happy it was someone he trusted? Besides it wasn't like she was going to date him anyway.

"I said I would go for a walk with him tomorrow afternoon. He was fairly insistent on seeing me again. I have no earthly idea why. I doubt he is ya know, interested in me. Why are you being so weird?" Watching him as he silently stood and left her alone to finish her food by herself.

"Im so done with this day." Ignoring her sadness laced throughout her words. He continued to Aki's home.

.....

"Aki, you know how he is with women. Do you really think this is the best for her?" Words harsher than normal, she knew he was angry.

"Yes, yes. Kai is a grown woman with needs, Sesshoumaru. It would be good for her and even better for the both of them if they fall in love." Rubbing his arm trying to soothe his anger away in a way only a mother could.

"I will not allow my pack to be defiled by your son." He stared down at her with the glare she knew meant death. Perhaps her idea wasn't as good as she had hoped.

"She is not a virginal woman. There is nothing to defile. Stop acting like a jealous pup. Maybe I should set you up too, you obviously could use some... release." Water elementals, such sexual creatures. It was easy to forget how different they were.

"I have no need for such things." Turning to leave she called after him.

"I'm sure you'd feel differently if you found the right woman!" He growled in annoyance at her assumptions.

.....

 

Kai couldn't understand why she felt a little nervous. This wasn't a date, really it wasn't. Brushing her long hair and opting to leave it down she sighed again. Trying to calm her nerves. 

She was a bit distracted when she realized her hair had grown quite a bit in just a few months. Must have been a side effect from the whole bonding of her soul thing. 

Walking down toward Aki's home she was greeted by Katsuo. Kami help her, he was even more handsome than she remembered. Smiling as warmly as she could, "nice to see you again."

"The pleasure is all mine." He took her hand in his, wrapping it around his arm as they began to walk towards the large garden outside the gates. "What happened to your pretty little face?" 

Crap, she had forgotten about her lip. It felt horrible and she lacked modern makeup to help cover it even a tiny bit. Bringing her hand up to her lip "oh, um, I'm a bit clumsy and fought the stairs last night. I lost." 

He tenderly touched her lip, inspecting the damage done. Her breath caught in her lungs, afraid to move. This was too close. "Tell me Kai, how have you come to live in the Ice Prince's castle?" 

She was starting to think that was a real title. Stepping back so he would release her face, she went over the tale of how she came to be the miko of souls. He laughed with her over the impossible situations she seemed to get herself into and told her of how he and Sesshoumaru grew up together. Kai enjoyed hearing about a young Sesshoumaru more than anything. 

Snow started to gently fall in fat flakes from the sky above. Shivering as Katsuo pulled her close under his arm. "I think it is time I return you. I didn't realize humans grew cold so easily. Perhaps next time we should stay indoors." 

"Now don't you start too with the whole 'humans are fragile' thing. I already have Sesshoumaru and Botan giving me that lecture" rolling her eyes and giggling. If she wasn't so cold she would have been more alarmed at his closeness. Completely missing his assumption of a next time.

"I can help heal your wound faster." Clutching her face with his other hand drawing her closer. "It would just take a little lick." 

Feeling like a deer caught in headlights she didn't know what to do and froze. Not giving her time to respond her, he slowly brought his lips near hers. Licking her lower lip before releasing her cheek.

Chuckling at her silence and ushering her toward the steps. "I will see you again. I enjoyed our time together." 

Still stunned she turned and began to climb the stairs nearly missing the glare Sesshoumaru was giving to Katsuo. Katsuo just waved and turned to walk off into the distance. 

"You let him kiss you." There he went again with statements as questions. He didn't even bother looking at her. 

"I did not. He, he licked me. Oh Kami that sounds worse. I'm not sure what happened. He said he could heal my wound faster and the next thing I know he was licking my lip." She reached up and touched the offending lip as they walked inside.

"Do not disgrace our pack by acting like a whore." That was the last straw. She whirled around leaping in front of him, coming toe to toe. 

"Now listen here. I am not a whore nor have I ever been. Stop accusing me of being one you fucking jackass. I am not like her and never will be. Get that through your fucking head." She pulled his hair out of spite, immediately feeling like a child for doing so.

Sesshoumaru wasn't sure what she meant by that but felt it was best to let it go. He just wanted to protect her and insulting her perhaps wasn't the best way to do so.

Drawing in a deep breath. "I'm sorry I snapped at you, Sesshoumaru. You've just hit a sore spot one too many times." Staring down at her hands, twisting her fingers "Look, nothing happened and nothing will happen between Katsuo and I. You don't have anything to worry about." Even if there would be something there, it wouldn't work out. Especially after he found out she was a widow and not a virginal woman. She had no delusions about her value to a man in this era. 

Sensing her melancholy mood, he spoke once more against his better judgment of remaining silent. "You should wear your hair down more often, it adds to your beauty." 

Wondering how many times she would be shocked in a day she smiled at his compliment. "Thank you. Will I see you tonight?"

"Yes." He paused before leaving her. "Bathe. I care not for the smell of his desire on you." And he was back to being a jackass. 

"Oh yes mighty Lord Sesshoumaru. At once." Rolling her eyes before heading to find Rin. 

....

"Hey, Rin." Kai joined her. She was lying on her back playing with Kata who had grown big. Kai wandered how large she would get. Kata could very well end up being a thirty pound cat. 

"Why do you always say that? There's no hay around in my room." She waved the pink ribbon in front of the cat's face watching her pounce.

"It's just a saying where I'm from. I'm not even really sure why." Laughing at how ridiculous she must sound to Rin at times.

"Oh. That's kinda weird." She giggled. "How did your walk with Katsuo go?"

"Well... it was strange I guess. I had a nice time talking to him and we laughed a lot." She hadn't even really processed the whole ordeal yet. But there she was going over it with a young teenage girl.

"It sounds like a nice time. How was it strange then?" Oh where to start? It was a confusing mess.

"It... he... then Sesshoumaru..." huffing in annoyance and taking a deep breath she started again. "He licked my lip. I mean for real just flat out licked it. Like a weird frog kiss. Of course Sesshoumaru saw and thought I let him kiss me and accused me of being a whore. Ugh, he's so uptight he thinks anyone with any sort of sexuality is a whore. Fucking asshat." Her eyes went wide at realizing all that had tumbled out of her mouth. "Sorry Rin. I kind of went off there."

"It's alright. I actually like it when you don't hold back around me. I'm not a little girl anymore but everyone still treats me like one." The more time they spent together the more Kai had come to see Rin not as a child but a young woman coming into her own. 

"Oh I know, Rin. I think it has to be harder living with Youkai too. We are just babies compared to them. I'll be twenty seven in two weeks and I'm often called child around here. Go to a human village and I'm an old hag." She flopped back on the floor and sighed. "The world is just so different here. Sometimes I don't know where I belong."

"I know what you mean. I want to be with Kohaku but..." she turned to look at Kai. "If I do, I know I'll die of old age and leave my father all alone. Maybe I should try to marry a youkai instead, like you." 

"Like me? What do you mean?" She went on a walk not a date and certainly didn't do a marriage dance or anything.

"Katsuo. He's handsome and a great warrior to be father's first in command. What more could you want?" The fluffy white cat laid across Rin's chest purring with delight as she scratched her ears. 

"There is so much more to a husband than that. He needs to be kind, gentle, protective, thoughtful and of course needs to love you as much as you love him. Love is the base of marriage and everything else strengthens it. Love, Rin. That's what I want and it's what you should want too." Rin smiled her big endearing smile with dreamy eyes staring off into the distance.

"Love. That sounds nice. I think I love Kohaku and do you think maybe... if I wish hard enough, he will love me one day?" Oh the days of teenage love felt just as real as they did when she was her age. 

"Only time will tell if it's meant to be. You're so easy to love it won't be hard for any boy to fall in love with you." Kai liked to think she had many years before she had to think of marriage. She had to remember what time she was living in though, which meant at sixteen she was of age. 

"I bet it will happen to you too. I know you don't want it to because Takeo but I just can't think of you being alone forever." Was that really what she was looking at if she didn't try? Being alone forever. 

"Ugh that reminds me. I have to 'bathe to remove the disgusting scent of male desire' off of me." Mockingly in her best Sesshoumaru voice. She rolled to sit and gave Kata a nice snuggle, might as well since she was headed to the bath house. 

"I'll see you for the evening meal, Kai." Speaking more loudly as Kai sneezed a few times.

"Sorry." Laughing at her own misfortune. The cutest thing ever would be a little ball of histamine. "I wonder what Jiro is making tonight. Maybe tonight is the night he actually lets me help." The girls giggled knowing it was as likely as either of them sprouting wings.

.....

"You bathed." Well no shit Sherlock is what she wanted to say.

"You asked me to, didn't you?" Her tone was sharp. As much as she tried, she was still miffed about his assumptions from earlier. More so the name calling.

What neither woman knew was that earlier Sesshoumaru had gone back to his room for a scroll he left the night before. He could have sent someone but didn't enjoy others in his personal space. He had heard most of the conversation, mostly on Kai's thoughts about love. Realizing he may have been concerned more than he should have not having heard her views before. 

He wasn't even really sure why he was so disturbed by the thought of her being with Katsuo sexually. Perhaps it was the thought she could capture the heart of the man who had broken so many. If so, she would be swept away leaving him alone once more. Though he played with the thought process of such, he wasn't one to accept it. 

"I wish for the two of you to join me tomorrow." Beginning to eat the roasted pork first. He always enjoyed Jiro's roasted pork.

"What will we being doing?" Rin's sweet voice filled with excitement. 

"There is a haven for youkai orphans who have contacted me for help dealing with the growing Bat problem nearby." They seemed to be growing in numbers and causing more trouble than usual in that area. He would rather find the cause and finish them off for good. Which is why he chose to go himself. "I wish for you to talk with the children and make sure they are being treated well." 

"Of course, father. Do you think they'll have babies?" The thought hadn't occurred to him the women would want to adopt one of the children and hoped the question was more innocent in nature. 

"I do not know." Kai was much too quiet for comfort. She regularly chatted in about some sort of nonsense during the evening meal.

"I'll go. Is there anything we need to bring or is this just a day trip?" Much to his surprise she seemed back to herself. Often astonished with how quickly the humans changed emotions.

"We will leave early morning and be back before nightfall." She made eye contact and smiled.

"Alright. I'd like to have a list made of the children, their ages and genders while we are there. I can make sure they have proper clothing for the cold when we get back. I had no idea we had an orphanage nearby. If it's alright I'd like to be more involved with it in the future and get these children families." She began going over a mental checklist of the things she needed to do while there. 

"Me too. I also want to hold some babies while we are there. They're so cute and cuddly!" Rin paused a moment and thought "do you think they have animals there? Other than farming ones. If not, can we get them some? I bet it would make them as happy as Kata has made me." 

Sesshoumaru was proud to see how involved his pack wanted to be. He may be efficient and logical with his dealings of the land but they clearly could be the heart. 

"I have not personally been there. We can discuss your ideas after we have evaluated." As he listened on as the women began chatting about the ideas they had, he smiled to himself. This is what pack was for, to make up for what he lacked.


	13. I could have died as trash

CHAPTER 13: I could have died as trash

"Do you really need this much?" Staring down and the two women, each with a large bag. 

"Of course! I gathered some clothes from Aki and socks too. You can never have too many socks for children." Kai adjusted the bag thrown over her shoulder. Trying to balance it without the Orb digging into her side further.

"I have sweets." Sheepishly looking up at her father. Rin's bag was nearly as big as Kai's that held clothing.

"Very well." Helping secure the bags and placing each on Ah-Un they ventured off. It wasn't more than a half hour before they arrived.

Hidden away in the forest was a large building. It looked self sufficient with farming and had plenty of firewood stacked next to it. The freshly fallen snow had dusted everything in white. 

A round man came out tinged with a yellow hue and hair mustard yellow. Black eyes peering at them as he waddled over. 

"Why hello! You must be Lord Sesshoumaru himself. We are honored by your presence." Bowing before looking over "and who might these enchanting women be?"

"The women of my pack. They have come to tend to the children while I handle the bats." The round man nodded.

"Please come in." Sesshoumaru left without a word knowing if either had trouble he would hear them. 

As they walked in they saw the children. Not as many as Kai thought there may be which was a relief to her. There was a small baby around eight months old crawling on the clean wooden floor. Two boys around six years sitting near the fire eating rice with the three year old girl and ten year old boy. 

"We have another but he has gone to the stream for water and will return shortly. This is Chiho, crawling around. Mika is our other little girl. Jin is on the right, Junji on the left. They're twins if you couldn't tell." He chuckled at his own joke, they were identical. "Soji is our other young man over here." 

A young boy looking around fourteen walked in with a pale of water. "Oh and this is Nobou. He helps me so much around here. I don't know what I'd do without him."

All the children were full youkai except Nobou. His black hair was long and within it on the top of his head sat two dog ears just as black. It was clear he was like Inuyasha. 

"Well hello everyone. I'm Kai and this is Rin. We've come to see how you are all doing and if there is anything you might need." Placing the bag down and scooping up the baby, placing her on her hip. 

Over the next few hours they passed out clothing and made lists of things they may need. It wasn't anything they actually needed, they were self sufficient here. It was more of lists Kai felt they could do with more for comfort. Better clothing, some toys, sweets and each could use a warm hat. Youkai adults may not feel the cold as much but the children did. 

Rin seemed to take a liking to Nobou who, the poor thing, didn't seem to know what to do with the attention. He was quiet and reserved a far cry from the out going and energetic Rin. By the end she had him laughing and it was a sweet sight. She was certainly a wonderful person who brought light anywhere she went.

Sesshoumaru came in through the front door. "Kai, is everything acceptable?"

"They are well taken care of thanks to Sunao. Though they seem to have a serious lack of puppies or kitties." She giggled as she saw the subtle hint in his eyes of annoyance. 

"Very well. It is time for us to leave. Prepare for such." He turned to Sunao, peering down at the short rounded man. "the bats are no longer a problem." 

"Thank you my Lord. If there is ever a way to repay you, please let me know." He bowed again. Sesshoumaru turned and walked back outside without another word. Kai quickly gathered the empty bags and lists she made.

"I have to go now. I'll come and see you again, okay?" Rin smiled big for Nobou who shyly smiled back.

"I... I'd like that." He stared at his feet and shifted uncomfortably.

"Come on Rin. It's time to go." Kai gathered Rin nearly having to pull her along. She was obviously smitten with the orphan boy.

Sesshoumaru placed Rin first on top of the two headed dragon. Turning to Kai who looked at him with an emotion he hadn't seen before.

"They'll get adopted, right?" He wanted to lie to her but it wasn't in his nature to do so.

"It is rare a child is adopted into a family when they are older such as these children. The infant does have a chance of adoption." Her face fell causing him to feel a small ping throughout his body. Which he dismissed promptly.

"That's what I was afraid of. They're such nice children too. It won't stop me from trying to find them homes. In the meantime I'll bring whatever happiness to them I can." He lifted her up placing her behind Rin.

"I would expect nothing less from you." She smiled and held onto the dragon. It wasn't long before they were back in the castle and warm with wonderful food in front of them. Rin retired early taking little food with her to her room leaving the two adults to themselves. 

"My mother who gave birth to me was a whore." It was a matter of fact statement. "She never wanted me. I don't even know her name. My father who adopted me was at a medical convention in a nearby city. He had gone out for drinks with a few of his colleagues and was walking back to the hotel when he heard a noise. He looked in the alley and saw a woman placing something in the garbage. She offered sex for money and he declined. He heard crying coming from the garbage and immediately knew what was going on. She ran and he never saw her again."

She looked up from her tea towards the fire. "I was thrown out as trash. If my parents hadn't taken me in, I'm not sure what would have happened. Maybe I would have died as trash. They died when I was eighteen but I lived my life feeling loved everyday because of them. I want those children to feel love. That's important to me." 

So much death in her young life and still she smiled and carried on. She laughed often and managed to bring a smile to others around her. Often he felt he knew her very well then days like this he didn't know enough.

"I understand. Whatever you wish will be done." Anything that could be done, would be. If not for the orphans but for her.

"And I swear by everything holy, Sesshoumaru, after having shared my life with you. If you ever call me a whore again I will cut you." Her tone even and sharp, staring at him directly.

"I will not speak such a word to you again." It was a promise out of respect. 

"Good. Because I don't like fighting with you." Leaning over and nudging him with her shoulder. "I kinda like you and wouldn't want to have to mess up that pretty little face of yours." They both laughed at her ridiculous statement. They sat in companionable silence for some time.

"If you wish to be courted by Katsuo, I respect your decision." He would still kill him if he hurt her. It was in his right as pack Alpha.

"I'm not going to be courted by anyone, Fluffy. You don't have to worry about that." She flopped back to lay on the floor and sighed. "I'm too old for this shit, dating. Uh, courting. I don't care for it."

"You are young, Kai." Did he see her as a child? Sometimes she wondered. Knowing she had to be at least a few hundred years younger from the stories she heard.

"I am not. I'm human and for a human I'm getting on in age. I'll be twenty seven soon, that's not a young maiden age. Maybe you're just old." She turned so she could place her head on his thigh using it as a pillow of sorts. "Yeah, I think you're just old. So shouldn't you be the one trying to find a mate?"

"I have no interest in such things." She rolled her eyes. 

"Why not? Love is great. Marriage more so. There is someone who is always waiting for you, someone to rely on, to worry over, to cuddle with after a bad day or good day." Wearing a sweet smile only produced by knowledge of what she spoke of.

"Love is not an emotion many would bear towards me. I would much rather not deal with the matter." He untied the ribbon in her hair, letting it fall gently into his lap. Mindlessly combing through it with his claws.

"Well then, we are in the same boat." She sifted slightly. "That feels nice." Letting out a soft sigh.

"I used to do this for Rin during thunderstorms. It was the only way she would fall asleep." Somewhat missing the days when Rin was a younger child. 

"So either you're trying to put me to sleep or you think of me as a child to soothe." Quirking an eyebrow at him as she met his gaze.

"You could use some sleep." Still unsure if he thought of her as a child or not she wanted to press but didn't. She'd rather just enjoy the attention of someone she cared for.

"Well too bad, Fluffy. I'm not ready for bed. I still haven't even bathed yet and I feel filthy." She threw up her hands gesturing to all of her.

"I will bathe you if you require it of me." She knew him better than that by now. Rolling her eyes and laughing as she sat up.

"I'll go get ready for bed so I don't fall asleep on you again." Stretching before she stood. "I'll see you tomorrow. Goodnight, Fluffy."

"Goodnight little human." Watching her leave as he resided to think back to when Rin was a child and avoid thinking of how much she had grown. 

 

......

 

A week had passed and Kai was bored out of her mind. She wanted to go to the haven to see the children already but was snowed in. She was having to play the waiting game so it wasn't so high for "little humans" as it had been mentioned to her.

Rin had friends in the castle to occupy her time. She was not as lucky. Already having used up every bit of yarn she had on mittens, scarves and hats for all the little ones in her life. She was about to go insane. So deciding to bother Lord Fluffy himself she wandered to his study where he did most of the paperwork. 

Sliding open the door and finding he wasn't the only one in the room. Katsuo was sitting opposite side of the low table speaking with Sesshoumaru about the training of the new members of the growing army. Suddenly flustered she tripped over her own feet walking in the room. Thankfully not falling on her face... again.

"Is everything alright?" Sesshoumaru was the one who spoke first.

"Uh, yeah. I'm just bored and thought I'd come see what you were up to and if I could help. Jiro already kicked me out of the kitchen and Rin is off having girl time with her friends." Settling down next to Sesshoumaru she somewhat regretted her choice in seat. Now she had to look at the handsome male in front of her. 

"We have just finished for the day. However I would more than enjoy your company." Katsuo smiled a kind smile at her. "After all I did say next time we would stay indoors." 

"Go on." First he was trying to make sure they wouldn't spend time together now it seemed like he was shoving her out the door. Men.

"Okay then." She was hesitant about the whole situation but looking forward to spending time with him again. As long as he didn't do the whole frog kiss thing.

Katsuo stood and took her hand not letting go as they went into the room normally for dining and entertainment. Sitting down by the fire as he sat next to her leaning back with his arm behind her. All this space and he had to sit up against her. 

"I hear you have taken interest in the orphan children. How very kind of you. Most humans wouldn't think to show any kindness to a youkai child." Hoping he wouldn't start up with the whole human thing again she let it go, for now.

"Children are children. It doesn't matter what they are." Meeting his stare with her lips pursed.

"You must think I am being rude. I haven't had much contact with humans so I apologize if it seems so." There he goes being all sweet again. She felt a little foolish for doubting him.

"It's alright. I've learned in the past five or six months being here that the relations between the two aren't the greatest. So I suppose I should keep that in mind." Giving him a kind smile which she couldn't help with those green sparkling eyes staring at her.

"I'll try to be less of an ass. No promises will be made though." She snorted at him knowing better.

"Yeah, best not to make promises you can't keep." Rolling into full blown laughter.

"I am not that bad." He pulled his arm around her, resting his hand on her hip.

"Well, you did lick me after knowing me for a day." There he went again being much too close for her comfort. 

"It helped, didn't it? Have anymore cuts I can heal?" Did he have a death wish? Surely Sesshoumaru would at least lop off a leg for that remark.

"No! Keep your tongue to yourself, Katsuo. Last time, Sesshoumaru saw and was not pleased. He thought you kissed me."

"It did cross my mind." Her heart was pounding as her cheeks pinked and she looked away. He pulled her closer and brought his lips to hers kissing her gently. She had no idea what to do.

By the time her brain caught up to her, she had already punched him in the nose. Thanking Kami he was a youkai and it didn't bleed. 

"perhaps I made the right choice last time not to." He laughed and rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"I'm so sorry. Nobody's kissed me since my husband and I don't really know what happened. Just instinct I guess. Are you alright?" Words were flying out of her mouth faster than she could think of them. Grabbing his face to inspect the very little damage done. 

"You're married? I should go." He wasn't laughing anymore and sounded angry. Standing to leave she sputtered.

"Yes... uh, no. I don't know how to answer that. I was married."

"You either are or you aren't. It's not that hard, Kai." Now she was angry and stood toe to toe with him. Being he wasn't more than two inches taller than her she felt more intimidating than she did with Sesshoumaru.

"Listen here you fucking ass. I was married and he died. I'm not some cheater nor am I too stupid to figure out if I have a husband waiting for me or not. Maybe you should go before I hit you again but this time intentionally." He was used to women yelling at him but it chilled him to the bone with her tone being low and even. 

Sesshoumaru had heard that tone before and delighted in knowing it wasn't directed at him. Sliding the doors open he entered and looked upon the disaster unfolding. However, unfortunately for him, he was the water to douse the fire. 

"Until next time, Kai." Katsuo left without another word as Sesshoumaru had to do everything in his power not to smirk and bring the little human's wrath upon him next.

"May I ask what he did to deserve such harsh words?" Now she felt like a jerk, maybe she overreacted. She surely made a nice afternoon much worse than it could have been. 

"He kissed me, I punched him. I tried to apologize then it just got out of hand. Now wipe that smirk off your face. I told you I wasn't one for the whole courting thing or whatever this was." He had absolutely nothing to worry about with Katsuo. She could handle her own just fine.

"I will remember not to do such." He laughed at her misfortune. If she wasn't so flustered she would have enjoyed the sound.

"I didn't do it on purpose. You better be nice to me too, with him gone you're all I've got to bother." Giving a small chuckle at how ridiculous everything must seem to him while rubbing her forehead. "You ever have a girl hit you after a first kiss?"

"I have not." He sat while She dropped to the floor and laid down, sprawled out on her back.

"There's a first time for everything." Turning her head to face him. 

"I do not hold the same odds he does. I doubt I will experience the same." he grabbed her shoulders and pulled her over to him. She somewhat felt like a dog pulling a chew toy over. 

"He's been around with quite a few women, hasn't he? I can't say that I'm surprised. You two are hundreds of years old, you're bound to have racked up quite a few numbers." She placed her head on his lap.

"I am not the same as he is." As he began to rub lines over her forehead with the pads of his fingers. He could tell Kai had a headache coming on and she would often get cranky if she did. Might as well take care of the issue beforehand.

"What do you mean? Like, you prefer men to women?" Holding her breath waiting for an answer. She wasn't even sure why.

"No. I view sex differently than he does." The feeling of relief as well as confusion as to why she felt relief. If he like guys it wouldn't have any effect on her.

"Well that's obvious." She laughed at the thought of how different the two men were. 

They carried on talking through the rest of the afternoon. It turned out to be a nice one after all, as cheesy as it sounded, he made it better. 

 

.....

"Sesshoumaru, let me speak with her." Standing outside of Kai's door just after dawn. 

"It is unwise to wake her." Other than it being inappropriate in his opinion to be in her room, she was not a morning person.

"I don't care. I need to speak with her." Alright, let him wake her and get hit again. Maybe he'd learn from it. Sesshoumaru stepped aside.

Katsuo slid open the door and let himself into Kai's room to find her bundled up on her futon sleeping. 

"Kai." He bent down and shook her shoulder. "I need to speak with you." 

"I'm going to murder you." More mumbling than actual words, refusing to open her eyes. 

"Not much of a morning person, are you?" Chuckling as he swept away the hair from her face. 

"Fuck off." Kai turned over and brought the covers over her head.

"Kai, please. I wish to speak with you about the other day." He almost thought she went back to sleep. 

"What? I figure there's not much more to say. It's gonna be 'bla bla bla, I didn't know you're a widow, bla bla bla pity pity pity." Sitting up and looking him in the eye. She'd heard it all before and didn't care to hear false empathy.

"I wish for you to give me another chance. I will keep my lips to myself or at least attempt to." Grabbing her hands inside his, she could see he was sincere in his request. Kai just didn't want the same thing he did. 

"How about we get to know each other as friends?" He couldn't say no to that smile, it was endearing and sweet.

"I can accept that." Leaning in he kissed her cheek and rose to his feet.

"I thought you said you'd keep your lips to yourself?" Burying herself back into the mountain of blankets.

"I said I'd attempt to." Ugh that gorgeous man was beyond help.

"Just close the door behind you, it's too early." Growling as she pulled the covers over her head listening for the click of the doors.

"I believe you have finally been rejected by a woman." Green eyes meeting gold.

"Really? I didn't hear that at all. I will have her, I just need to take my time." Wearing a lopsided smile as he stared up at his childhood friend.

"You will not." Walking away without listening to for his reply. If Sesshoumaru had anything to say about it, Katsuo would never touch her again.

....

Sesshoumaru looked on as Kai sat surrounded by the orphan children with Rin by her side holding the infant Chiho. She told a fanciful story she called Snow White which enchanted the children as the night wore on.

"Alright everyone, time for bed. I know you must be sleepy." Mika pouted as she was ushered to her futon and tucked in. She was an adorable child. Rose gold hair shades darker than her rose gold skin with light green eyes. 

"I know you don't want to but you must sleep. Tomorrow is a whole new day." Kissing Mika on the forehead and going over to the twins boys who had already tucked themselves in.

"Now boys, I want you to stay in bed all night and actually sleep. No pranks my little ones." Kitsune were very mischievous much like Shippou was at their age or at least what Kagome had told her. Their appearance was much the same as his but coloring was with white hair and ice blue eyes. Kai guessed they were similar to an arctic fox and Shippou a forest one. 

"We will!" Jin piped in with Junji following "we promise!" Kissing them each on the forehead as well after a nice giggle and completely not believing them.

Rin laid Chiho down and covered her up as Kai went to the other little boy Soji. Already laying down and facing the wall. He was a quiet child and she suspected angry at life. 

"Goodnight, Soji." He didn't acknowledge her as she smoothed his hair and kissed his temple. One day he would come around to her. Short blonde hair, dark brown eyes and pale skin. Kai wondered if her children would have looked similar to him. 

Coming to Nobou who was sitting outside on the porch. Looking over the white landscape. 

"Gonna let me tuck you in tonight?" She bumped her shoulder into his.

"Nope. Maybe next time." She had been coming every other day for the past week establishing a nice routine and getting to know all of them. She knew he was too old to be tucked in but would always ask.

"You seem more distant today. Everything alright?" Taking his hand in hers as they stared out to the vast forest.

"You think anyone will ever love me? Despite what I am?" Kai could tell it was something he had thought a lot about. It troubled his very soul.

"I know you already have people who love you. The boys and girls here adore you. Especially Mika. There isn't a single thing wrong with what you are either. Only thing wrong is other people's tainted hearts filling your head with nonsense." Squeezing his hand for good measure. 

"I hope you're right." She knew she was and would do anything to prove it to the boy.

"Are you ready to return?" Sesshoumaru came outside with Rin close behind.

"Can I fly with you tonight? I'm kinda tired and don't wanna fall off." Standing and bending over to kiss the Nobou's forehead. Maybe he'd stop blushing about that one day. 

"Go with father. Nobou, it was nice to see you today. I'll bring Kata next time like I promised." Smiling as Ah-Un walked over and laid down for her to climb on.

"Oh come on! They could do that the whole time? I'm on to you Ah-Un." Giving them the I'm watching you signal and staring at both heads. They answered with a huff and she swore eye rolls from each.

"I'll be back soon. See you later." Kai grabbed Sesshoumaru's mokomoko and spun around wrapping herself in it and standing next to him.

"What are you doing?" Questioning why he even bothered asking why she did anything anymore.

"I'm getting warm in your fluffy, Fluffy." Nobou stifled a laugh as Sesshoumaru fought the urge to sigh while he took off holding her to his side.

....

"When did the letter say?" Looking up at Sesshoumaru as they both went down the hall to their rooms for the night.

"Inuyasha will bring the children in three weeks." Stopping in front of her door as they continued to talk.

"That's not long from now. I'm excited to see them all. I'd also like Nobou and Inuyasha to meet. I'm gonna go bathe and get in bed." Stretching out her back with her arms held over her head.

 

It had been a nice long relaxing day. It was her twenty seventh birthday. She got to spend time with the kids, Aki gave her a whole bunch of new underwear in the modern style she liked, no doubt in hopes of her reproducing with Katsuo, Who had given her a small painting of the ocean at sunrise all with a nice dinner to round out the day. Rin had even given her a wooden rose painted purple and gold. 

Sesshoumaru grabbed her hand and placed a small object in her palm. She took it and looked, a small pearlescent white demon dog on a silver chain. A necklace with Lord Fluffy as his true form. It was even better that it matched the one Rin wore everyday.

A wide smile grew on her face as she leapt at him with a big hug. She loved it and even more so he gave it to her himself. 

"Thank you, Sesshoumaru. It's so beautiful and looks just like you." Releasing him and staring down at the gift. 

"It let's other youkai know who you belong to." If it was any other man she would have been offended by his possessiveness but she knew him and it was his pack she belonged to. 

He took it from her and placed it around her neck. The necklace was long and fit over her head, falling on top of her breasts over her kimono. 

"I love that it does. I truly feel like I belong here with you and Rin. Goodnight, Fluffy." Smiling the whole time she turned and went into her room.

....


	14. Fluffy things

CHAPTER 14: 

Weeks passed and Inuyasha coming with the children was soon approaching. Just a matter of days.

It was the first week of January, the third to be exact. The day Takeo had passed away. Kai sat in the garden in the cold air staring at the pond deep in thought. Three years seemed like such a long time and not enough at once. Honestly she just wanted to spend the day alone and sleep if she could. It was easier than the previous years but still hard.

The garden was still pretty even without the leaves on the trees and all the colorful flowers. The sky was mockingly cheerful, if she could will storm clouds she would have. Inu no Taisho came and sat beside her on the wooden bench. 

"It's a beautiful day today." She didn't acknowledge his presence, she didn't want to. He put his arm around her and sighed. "Sometimes I think it's easier to leave than be left behind."

"It's a cosmically cruel joke I can speak with spirits but not the one I want to most. I tried so hard, many times but he just isn't here. He's there and it's so far away." Staring on as the cool breeze rippled the water. 

"I wish I had the answers for you, Kaiya. Maybe it's time for you to move on with your life and get past this. To love someone again." He stood and bent down kissing the top of her head. "Think about it. It's not dishonoring him to love again." Over the months he was coming to think of her as a daughter. They often spoke during the day about life and helping her understand youkai better and in return forming a relationship.

"I'm not going to go after Katsuo if that's what you're thinking but I'll at least think about it." Looking up to the familiar golden eyes feeling still painfully saddened.

"He is not the only male you have to chose from." Walking down over the pond sending ripples with each step. 

Kai buried her face in her hands resting her elbows on her knees. It was growing colder with the breeze picking up to a sharp wind. She was getting cold but it didn't matter, did it? Nothing mattered today. 

Briefly thinking of how the mountain isn't far off, dispelling the thought after thinking of who would miss her. She had Rin whom she loved so dearly and all the children, Chiho, Jin, Junji, Soji and Nobou. She also had Sesshoumaru. Would he miss her if she disappereared? 

The wind blew harder knocking her necklace against her wrist. She grasped it with her numb fingers and smiled.

"Kai, what are you doing out here?" Speak of the devil or Youkai. Peeking up from her hands to see him standing tall with his hair whipping in the wind. 

"Nothing." Still holding the pendant in her palm against her chest.

"Come inside before you catch sickness." A command not to be confused with a request.

"I'm fine out here. Thank you though." Giving him a small smile trying to find her strength again. Feeling broken inside, weak.

"Little human, I know you are hurting however, this is not the solution." Gently scooping her up against her will. Kai laid her head on his chest listening to his heart beat. Steady, real, powerful much like everything about him.

Carrying her inside to her room, he placed her on the futon and wrapped a blanket around her. That was the moment she felt truly cared for by him. Sesshoumaru didn't have to do any of the things he did for her but still he did and it wasn't because he was just tolerating her.

He briefly left and returned with a tray of tea, herbs, cups and some sweets. Sitting next to her not on the futon but the floor he made a tea for her with the extra herbs.

"Drink this. It will calm you." She sighed. Not really wanting to drink anything but took it and began to sip it. Nibbling in the sweets as well. The least she could do was to do as he asked of her.

"I hate to admit it but I do feel better wrapped up in a blanket, drinking a warm drink... having you here too." Taking another deep breath trying still to find her strength. Her soul was so tired, tired of always being strong and wanted to just be weak for a moment. To be comforted.

"I will always come for you." He had said that before, hadn't he? 

"I'm noticing." A small chuckle escaped her lips. "It's just harder than I thought to move on. I just need some time to be weak and I think it's okay."

"Have you ever allowed yourself to before?" He wasn't sure what she meant but if it helped her move on then maybe it's what she needed to do. Especially if she hadn't before.

"Once. The day I met you. I've cried but to truly let myself go had only ever been once before. It's just easier to pretend everything is just fine, normal not desperate." Her breath was choppy at best but she was determined not to cry. "Do you think it's okay for me to love again, to try again? What if it happens all over and I'm just destined to be alone?"

"Do not let fear get in the way of what you want." If an innocent beauty with a sweetness about her was destined to be alone, then there was no hope for anyone else.

"I know you're right. Sorry I'm just wallowing in self pity. You don't have to sit here with me, I'm sure you have plenty of other things to deal with." Kai felt she needed to just snap out of it. Just go on and keep making the strides she had made since she had been thrust into this world. 

"You are more important. Besides once Katsuo hears you are ready, he will find himself here and I would rather enjoy seeing you hit him again." It was the truth but he also thought he could make her laugh, to smile again. Mostly wanting to see her hit him though.

"You are horrible." Reluctantly laughing at Sesshoumaru just being himself. 

"I have been notified of a litter of pups that are ready to leave the mother." That for sure would make her happy and snap her out of the melancholy mood she was in. Really he couldn't stand the scent of her sadness much longer.

"Really? When can we go get some for the children?" Those big blue hopeful eyes staring at him made him assured she was going to be alright.

"Anytime you are ready. I can have them brought here and you can pick out what you need or we can go to them." As he watched her eyes narrow and lips twist in thought he already knew her answer.

"Can we go now?" He chuckled as she hopped up and looked down at him ready to go.

"Hn." He stood and they walked down the hall stopping at his room. 

"Do you always have to wear your armor when we go out?" He didn't answer he as he placed it on himself as well as strapping his two swords to his hip and fastening his mokomoko to his right shoulder as usual.

"Let's see some puppies!" Excited wasn't even beginning to explain how she felt and was very appreciative of the distraction.

They walked together outside the gates of the marketplace soon coming to a small warm looking home. A man came out and smiled at them both. He was shorter than Kai, a ginger man with small freckles across the bridge of his nose and kind brown eyes.

"Lord Sesshoumaru it is an honor. You must be the Miko. It is an honor as well. I am Takahiro." This was a bit weird, he was acting as if she was the same status as Lord Fluffy. "Come, come. They are inside." 

Following the man inside there were six cute adorable fluffy Shiba Inu puppies. Immediately Kai went over and sat in the pile of puppies who flopped all over her. Surely she was in heaven. Sesshoumaru just hoped she wouldn't take all of the pupps knowing it very well could happen.

She picked three, two boys and one girl and was just about ready to go when she heard a whining in the other room. 

"Is there another puppy? Can I see it? I'm sure it's probably the one you want to keep but I just wanna snuggle it, if that's alright." She had a big smile on and handed Sesshoumaru the third puppy as he was already holding two. The men had insisted they could be delivered within the hour but she wasn't having any of it much to Sesshoumaru's clear delight. 

"He is a deformed pup, you wouldn't want him." He went over to the other room and took the puppy out bringing it to her and placing it in her arms. He was considerably smaller than the others almost half the size and had his front left leg deformed. It appeared he could walk on it just looked goofy. Perhaps broken during birth and didn't heal right.

"Oh he is just the sweetest." Sesshoumaru put down the arm load of puppies that had been forced on him.

"We will take this one as well. Deliver the others tomorrow." He handed Takahiro a small bag and ushered a very happy Kai to the door. The look on her face was all he needed to know that he wasn't leaving without the deformed runt.

As they walked back to the castle Kai untied her hair and placed the green ribbon around her new puppy's neck. The little guy licked her face and she giggled. 

Immediately going to the kitchen for him some food and a bowl of water and back to her room. Sesshoumaru stopped and took off his armor once again and rejoined her. 

"Do not name him after me." He knew her much too well.

"Aw, but he is so fluffy!" As much as he would like to deny it, it was her name for him and he didn't care to have another take it. Even though he was very much not fluffy. "He does kinda look like a kuma. So maybe that's what I'll name him."

"He is a ferocious beast." Chuckling at naming a small fluffy pup after a bear. The thing probably couldn't even kill a mouse if he tried.

"Then that's what I'll name him, Kuma." She picked him up and and brought his face to hers "do you like that name? Kuma?" The pup licked her face wagging his tail. He seemed to agree.

"Are you happy?" Really he didn't need to ask, it was clear to him just by her scent alone.

"Oh very much so. Thank you. I know you're not one for animals here and I just want you to know how much I appreciate it." Putting Kuma down and leaning over to hug him. He noticed her hands were warm against his neck and was glad they were. 

"After the others are delivered we will take them to the haven." She agreed and went through a list of names for the other ones, eventually agreeing to wait to see what the children said. As the day wore on more quickly than Kai noticed it was time for the evening meal. 

"Can I bring him with me? I don't want him to get lonely." Only this woman would think a pup would get lonely after a short amount of time.

"Very well. It will not become a habit." She picked him up and followed Sesshoumaru to the dining room. Finding Rin already there and the food having just been brought. 

"Oh he is so cute!" Rin jumped up and ran over to Kai as Sesshoumaru took his seat. 

"Isn't he? His name is Kuma, I think he looks just like one. Do you want to hold him?" Passing Kuma over to Rin and taking her seat as well. 

"The other three will be here tomorrow but this guy I get to keep thanks to your father. He really is a sweet man, isn't he." Sesshoumaru couldn't resist snorting at being called sweet, nobody outside this room would believe such an outlandish statement. 

"I think so too, Kai." These too were obviously delirious.

Evening turned to night and Kai slept well for a change. Kuma curled up next to her as she held him. This little guy is what she needed to heal and become whole again, she felt it. 

 

....

The puppy delivery had gone well. The female had quickly bonded to Soji and Kai was happy for that. Maybe she would bring him out of the angry cloud he was in. He had even smiled too. The children agreed on naming them, Miwa for the girl, Tetsu for the larger boy and Kenki for the other. All of the children were very happy.

"Are you ready for this?" Kai stared at Inuyasha's face and waited for his reply. 

"Yeah." Shifting slightly trying to hide his nerves. Sitting across from her as she held the orb in her hands.

"Okay. Place you hands over mine." The Orb glowed in tune with her pulse, her arms matching the rhythm, eyes turning black and purple.

"My son." Inuyasha's heart skipped a beat as he heard his father's voice for the first time. Looking to the left of Kai seeing a familiar face he had never seen.

"I guess I do look like you." He really wasn't sure what to say and didn't want to show too much emotion.

"I see much of your mother in you as well." Kai wished she could them more privacy but couldn't so she chose to remain as still and silent as possible.

"Keh." Shifting again where he sat.

"I am proud of you and everything you have accomplished. You have a fine family and i enjoy watching them grow." Inu no Taisho smiled at his youngest son. For so long he wished he could speak with him.

"I got lucky meeting Kagome. She's the best thing to have happened to me since mother died." It broke her heart to know how hard of a life he had. If she could take away some of that pain she would, hoping this would do something for him.

"No son, luck has nothing to do with it. You have always been a good man and deserved someone like her. I am sorry you had to go through the things you did. If I could change the way things happened, I would." He moved to sit next to Inuyasha and placed his arm around him like a father to young son would. 

"It's alright. I survived." Smiling back at his father. 

The two talked over things for around two hours before finally saying their goodbyes. Both feeling something inside them heal. Inuyasha finally got to meet his father and Inu no Taisho got to speak with his youngest. His mother even came to give him a kiss. He missed her so much and felt a bit overwhelmed at seeing his parents but it felt good. 

Taking his hands off of hers and looking her directly in the eyes. "Thanks, Kai." 

It was unspoken but they both knew what she had done for him. "Anytime and I mean it. Now let's get something to eat, I'm so hungry."

"Sounds good to me." He laughed and they walked to go get some of the delicious food that was waiting.

"Dad!" Both at once launched at him as he sat down. 

"Hey pups. Did you have fun with Rin?" Each sat next to him as he grabbed some food and began to eat.

"Yes." Maceo said while Sachi just nodded while climbing into her dad's lap. 

"Good. I'll be leaving tomorrow and I want you two to be good for Rin, Kai and uncle Sesshoumaru. Can you do that for me?" They each nodded. 

"Before you leave I'd like you to meet someone. He's an orphan boy and well, you two have a lot in common." Stuffing food in her mouth not nearly as fast as she wanted to with Kuma balled up in her lap. She had left him with Rin otherwise he would have fought for attention the whole time. The little fluff ball seemed worn out from play by with the kids.

"Sure. Do you want to go after we eat?" Kai nodded with her mouth stuffed full. She knew Sesshoumaru would say something if she replied without swallowing first as he often did.

"I will stay with the pups." Kai smiled knowing it was the responsible thing to do but really it was so he could have some playtime. 

After eating Inuyasha and Kai walked outside the gates. He bent down and motioned for her to climb on his back. 

"Oh a piggyback ride, how fun!" Taking off at a much faster pace than she anticipated. Within an hour they were at the haven.

"Hi everyone. This is Inuyasha." Everyone said their hellos as Kai pulled Nobou to the side. 

"I brought him here to meet you. I think you have a lot in common." Grabbing his hand and bringing him over to Inuyasha. "This is Nobou."

"I can see why she wanted us to meet." A smirk in place. Anyone with two eyes could figure it out. 

"Yeah." Looking down at the floor, clearly ashamed of his heritage.

"Come on kid. Let's go have a talk." They left to the porch to talk about things as Kai stayed and played with the kids and puppies. It was best to give them their privacy plus, come on puppies.

"How old are ya?" He sat with his hands in his sleeves and legs crossed. 

"Almost fifteen." He sat similar to Inuyasha. His clothing was black as he requested when Kai asked what color he would like. Nobou didn't care much for standing out.

"Almost a man, huh? Well got any questions for me?" Neither looked at each other choosing to stare out instead.

"Will I be alone forever?" Might as well just ask what he wanted to. It may be a long time before he came across another like himself.

"I don't know. I met Kagome when I was about a two hundred. I did spend fifty years pinned to a tree so for me it was a hundred and fifty. You could meet someone like her. I have a family that I never thought I'd have." Really he didn't think he would ever have as much as he did. His whole life he had been told he was worthless and had started to believe it too. 

"There is a girl who is really nice to me but I don't think I'm good enough for her. I'm just a half breed." Inuyasha knew those words way too well. It almost had cost him missing out on Kagome.

"Don't talk like that. If you're a good man then that's good enough no matter what you are. It took me a long time to learn that and I will make sure my pups know that too." He would make damn sure Maceo, Sachi and the new pup never knew the kind of pain he went through growing up. 

"You really think so?" Trying not to get his hopes up but he couldn't help himself.

"Yeah, I do. You got something to seal your demon blood?" If not they needed to get one made soon for him. Inuyasha went far too long without one.

"My father had it made for me before I was born." Pulling out from his clothing a necklace with a round red stone on it. 

"Good. Also keeping your night from the others?" Nobou nodded. He needed to keep it hidden from everyone until he found the ones he could trust no matter how much he liked the other children.

"Do you live in a Youkai village?" Inuyasha knew that would never happen. Even though he was half his mate was human. 

"No. I live in a human one. They accept me and my family there. I also have friends who accept me there too." To Nobou that was unfathomable. To have a family, friends and a village that accepted him for what he was. 

His whole life he had been treated as nothing. Except by his father, having his mother had died in childbirth and after his father died when he six he was sent here. The only reason he was even accepted was because Sunao was a good friend of his father's and vowed to keep him there should anything happen.

"I bet you haven't had many people who accepted you. I didn't either. Once you're a man you are welcome to come to my village and you can come work with me and Miroku slaying demons." Inuyasha looked at the boy who was very much who he was all those years ago. If he didn't reach out to him he wasn't certain anyone else would. 

"Who is Miroku?" As the two continued to talk, Kai took to tucking in the children. 

Soon it was time to leave and they both headed back to the castle. He didn't say too much other than he was a good kid and going to be alright. 

Rin had fallen asleep in a little pup pile as Inuyasha called it with the two children and Kuma. He sat himself down in the corner and lightly slept. Kai retired to her room leaving Kuma in the pup pile even though she knew she'd miss him. 

....

The next morning as the sun rolled through the room Inuyasha woke his children and said his goodbyes before he left. They each quickly went back to sleep, he surely knew what he was doing since they didn't whine either. 

Rin had her studies so Kai took the kids and played games, fed them and did nap time in which she joined in on all. Sesshoumaru came to check on how she was doing with them and found them in her futon with one tucked under each arm sleeping as soundly as she was. It was a beautiful sight to see.

The week with the children was a wonderful one. Each day was much of the same and they were very well behaved. Sesshoumaru said it was all from Kagome of course. Inuyasha had come and picked them up and made sure to see Nobou again before he left. He was very excited about the new addition to his family about to arrive within a month. 

Plans were made for them to visit once the baby was born and Rin would stay for a month or so to help out Kagome while she recovered just as she had helped with the other two. 

Three days after they had left Kai was awoken by a distressed man in her room. Pacing back and forth just after dawn.

"You alright?" He was a tall man, muscular with brown eyes and orange hair. She wondered if he were a tiger youkai, it wouldn't surprise her with his pacing.

"You're awake. Good. My wife is in trouble I need you to get there now. They'll kill her just like they killed me." Well shit. This wasn't good at all. She jumped out of bed and scrambled to put on her miko clothing. It was similar to Kagome's but black pants and a dark purple top. 

"Alright let's find Sesshoumaru." She tied her hair back while running to his study. 

"He's not here." This just was getting even better for her. Unsure what to do and little time to figure something out. 

"Tell me what's happening on the way." She headed out towards the training grounds. Maybe Katsuo knew where Sesshoumaru was and could take her to him.

"She went after the monks who killed me and they have taken her captive. They are taking her to their temple for judgment. She hasn't done anything wrong except be youkai in their eyes. Please hurry." It didn't take long for her to reach Katsuo. If she wasn't so frantic she may have taken the time to admire the shirtless men. 

"Katsuo. Where is Sesshoumaru I need to find him." He grabbed her hands and could sense she was upset and in a hurry.

"He isn't here, he is marking the borders like he does every Wednesday morning. You know this, Kai. What's wrong?" Was it already Wednesday? She still wasn't as fully awake as she wanted to be for this situation.

"I need to leave now. Right now. A spirit is here and says his wife has been taken by some monks who are going to kill her just for being a youkai. I've got to go." She tried to pull away from him and he stopped her. He knew it was a bad idea for her to go alone and knew Sesshoumaru would kill him if anything happened to her.

"I'll go. How far is it?" Letting go and going over to the wall to put on his armor and strap his weapons. A large sword and a small dagger he strapped to the small of his back.

"It's somewhere over the border to the south. At a temple." Admiring how calm he seemed. She was handling it well but not as well as she wanted. 

"I know that place. I've always said we needed to handle them. This is the first time they've crossed the border to get one of our own that I know of. Radical monks who believe it is best to kill all youkai." What had changed to make them cross over? Everyone feared Sesshoumaru more so those monks. 

Dragging her over to the stables and saddling his red dragon. This one just had one head and had spikes. Placing her on first and climbing behind her. She had to admit she was impressed when he didn't make some kind of snarled remark or put some moves on her. They took off quickly and when the temple came into sight they could see a group of monks who were nearly there with the captive in tow.

Katsuo landed the dragon in the forest and helped her off motioning for her to stay quiet. He whispered to her to keep quiet, stay with Naru, the dragon, and to run if she saw anyone but himself. Handing her the dagger, he took off running in a wide circle behind the monks. 

She watched from very far away as he stealthily picked off one by one and finally freed the youkai. She was extremely relieved and watched as the spirit man went over to his wife who had no idea he was with her.

Feeling a sharp pain in her right side she turned to see a monk coming back at her with a knife. Not having much time to react she fumbled with the dagger dropping it. She bent down to pick it up as he swiped at her neck making him miss her.

"What are you doing?" Everything felt strange and almost dreamlike. 

"We shall rid this world of all that is unholy and those who fraternize with them." He came at her again and she rolled to the left becoming very angry.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Her eyes blackened all over. "Your soul has been tainted by hatred and is no longer worthy to be on this earth." Jumping up she held the dagger out in front of her feeling lightheaded. The last thing she remembered was lunging at his throat.


	15. Recovery and new beginnings

CHAPTER 15: recovery

Walking the southern boarder of his lands, Sesshoumaru soaked in the quiet peacefulness. It was one of the reasons he enjoyed the activity, he appreciated the calm serenity.

Coming around a river-bend that separated the two lands he caught a familiar scent. It was Kai's blood and he could tell there was more than just from a small scrape. What was she doing out here?

Racing as fast as he could, while managing to track her scent, he finally saw her as she growled out something to the monk and lunged. Using his energy whip to kill the monk where he stood, looking up to see her fall and Katsuo catch her right before she hit the ground. 

Katsuo met his gaze before mounting Naru with Kai in his arms and taking off. Sesshoumaru looked down to the puddle of her blood on the forest floor. Growing enraged he transformed into the mighty daiyoukai beast he was, heading to the temple just out of view. 

....

Katsuo held her in his arms trying to stop the bleeding. It was pouring out quickly from her side just under her ribs. He tried to lick it to stop it and it did nothing. Placing his hand tightly over the open wound as the castle came into view. 

"Stay with me, Kai. Stay with me." Not waiting for Naru to land, he jumped off and headed inside. 

Running as quickly as he could to Botan with her lifeless in his arms, it was he first time he had ever felt panic. 

....

Ripping through the flesh of the monks with his teeth and flinging the lifeless bodies against the walls of the stone temple and finally coming to the leader. He transformed back into his human form and walked leisurely toward him, picking him up by the throat and bringing him up his eye level.

"You dare to harm what is mine? Your death will be slow and still more merciful than it should be." Pricking the back of his neck with his poison claws, he let the man drop to the stone floor. The screams coming from the man did nothing to ease his anger, taking to the sky in his energy ball and arriving shortly after Katsuo did with Kai.

Opening the door to see Kai's body laying limp on the futon as Botan ripped off her miko top. Trying desperately to stop the bleeding. Flushing the wound out with water to see and finally grabbing a needle and thread to stitch it closed.

"One of you lift her." Katsuo grabbed her under the shoulders and lifted her up as Botan slathered a salve on top of it and placed a bandage tightly around her lower ribs and stomach. He had done all he could to stop the bleeding. Katsuo laid her back down and stood to face Sesshoumaru.

"This is your fault. I told you we should have dealt with them weeks ago when they started spatting off that radical crap." Sesshoumaru's angry golden eyes met the equally angry green, staring up at him.

"They had not bothered youkai before now." If they started taking innocent lives just out of possibilities, then they were no better than they were. 

"It doesn't matter, Sesshoumaru! We needed to protect our kind and you failed. They're just humans." How could this man claim to care for the very woman dying in front of him and dismiss her own kind?

"She is human, or have you failed to notice while trying to bed her? You should have never taken her." If anyone was to blame, it was him. She was under his care, she trusted him and he failed.

As Katsuo brought his fist back, Botan grabbed his arm. "this is not the place for you two to argue like hatchlings about whose fault this is or isnt. Sesshoumaru, i need to speak with you privately. come."

As they each stepped outside of the room, he looked back to see Katsuo kneel down beside her and take her hand in his own. Botan closed the door and stood in front of him, sighing heavily as he ruffled his feather hair. 

"I know what you are thinking. You cannot use that sword of yours on her. The Orb ties her soul to the underworld and if that tie is cut, her life will end." He shifted and looked down taking a moment. "What im trying to say, If she dies tonight it is permanent." 

"you are unsure if she will live." He saw her, he didnt need to ask.

"If she makes it through tonight then the chances are good but..." Botan couldnt bring himself to say the words. Placing his hand on Sesshoumaru's arm. "Ive done what i can for now. It's up to her. Im going to get some warm water to wash the blood off of her. I'll return shortly."

Returning inside the room, Katsuo whispered in her ear and stood. "I need to wash. There isn't anything i can do for here anyway." Hand on the door he stopped and hesitated. "Let me know if anything changes." 

Sitting beside her head and staring over her pale body covered in her own blood. He wasn't sure what he could do for her but knew she needed her pack there in case she died and he wouldn't subject Rin to such a task. In any case, she was he and he wanted to be there for her. Botan returned with arms full of fresh linens, washcloths and a large bowl of warm water.

"Remove the rest of her clothing while i prepare things to get this blood off her." Botan stayed at his task of soaping up and wetting several washcloths and putting them on one of the tables.

Starting with her shoes he removed each and noticed her right sock was bright red instead of the stark white the left one was. Pulling each off and placing them in the growing pile. He moved to untie her hamaka and slip them off her seeing the blood streaked down her leg. 

"Those too, Sesshoumaru. Now is not the time for modesty." Coming over with the supplies and kneeling beside her. 

He felt it was a violation of her for him to have undressed her in the first place. Sliding her underwear off, hoped she would be well enough to yell at him for it later. He wasnt one to be embarrassed over her nudity but it was enough to know she was. He would have the items burned just for their scent alone.

"Her skin is cool." A washcloth was thrust into his hand as Botan picked up another. 

"She has lost a lot of blood. This is not a good situation for a human." Each took to cleaning her off before changing the bedding underneath her and covering her with a few blankets.

The day came and went turning into night, the world continued to clamor on as if her life wasn't hanging in the balance. 

Rin was finally allowed in to see her while Botan went home to bathe. Sesshoumaru was pained to see his daughter cry over Kai's chest begging her to wake up, to not die and leave her. Aki, void of her usual lighthearted smile, took Rin back to her house to keep her for the time being so she wasn't alone while they all waited. 

Expecting Botan as he heard footsteps heading up the stairs to the right of the room, he was greeted with the sight of Katsuo. He didn't stay long and seemed uncomfortable being there at all. Neither spoke to each other, still blaming the other for her condition in the first place. 

Botan returned and brought food and tea which Sesshoumaru refused. "i was hoping she would have awoken by now."

"Hn." looking down at her pale face wondering if he would ever see her thick lashes open again.

Botan ate and fell into a light sleep against the wall. Sesshoumaru listened in the silent night to every heart beat, every ragged breath her body made for any sign she would awaken again. 

What seemed like an eternity, was only hours as she finally awoke in the middle of the night. Opening her eyes to see the silvery white hair of the man who always seemed to be there.

"Are you an angel?" Managing a weak smile up at him. Botan awoke to hearing her voice and silently left to get a hot pot of tea for her as well as give them privacy.

"no." Brushing her hair back from her face and neck feeling her skin was still cool and clammy.

"i thought i saw you through the trees." Bringing her hand out from under the blanket, silently asking for his, he took it inside his.

"i caught the scent of your blood on the wind." She squeezed his hand as the pain increased in her side while gritting her teeth. 

"Did i kill him?" With as much value she put into all life, he doubted she would have wanted to.

"I did." She only nodded her head to acknowledge his statement.

"it hurts, Sess." She was struggling to breathe through the pain as Botan came and sat next to her, placing a mixture of herbs into a small cup.

"Lift her a little so she can drink. Kai, i need you to drink all of this." Bringing the cup to her lips as Sesshoumaru held her up just enough. It wouldnt do very much for the pain but would put her to sleep quickly which was just as good. Drinking all of it despite the horrid taste it left in her mouth, she felt warmth starting through her body as her head was gingerly laid back down.

"Kuma?" Botan nodded at Sesshoumaru.

"He will be brought here. Sleep." Drifting off into sleep she grabbed his hand harder having not let go. As if he was the lifeline keeping her in this world.

Never sleeping, he stayed beside her the rest of the night holding her hand. When the sun rose, Kuma was brought in by Rin who was happy to hear she had briefly awoken in the night. She thought it was fitting Kai would ask for Kuma, who sat at her feet whining. 

After Rin left, he growled at the pup and making him immediately stopped. Grabbing him by the scruff and placing him on her left side, the little guy nudged between her arm and ribs laying his head on her shoulder. That gimpy little pup was probably one thing she needed most to get out of this mess.

Botan went to retrieve another pot of hot water, suspecting she would wake again soon. It was already nearing noon and she should have awoken hours ago. Making his way to the kitchen where he met Katsuo.

"How is she?" Botan went about putting a pot of water on the fire. Knowing Katsuo had sought him out.

"I believe she will live. She had awoken in the night and i am expecting her to wake again soon. She has begun to stir. If you go there now you may be able to speak with her." He turned to face the young man.

"I will wait until she is better." Katsuo avoided looking into Botan's silvery eyes.

"She wont blame you for this." She was much too kind of a person even if there was blame to be had, she wouldn't give it.

"He was right. I shouldnt have taken her with me." Accepting his mistake was one thing but to look her in the eyes and know what his failure almost cost her was another. She should blame him.

"Katsuo, this isnt about you. I know she has come to think of you as her friend and would be hurt to know you didn't come to her." Looking behind him to check the water and turning back to face him again.

"You're right." Leaving toward where she was. Regardless if he finally got to be with her or not she had become his friend and enjoyed seeing her smile, hearing her laugh and her long tales of the adventures in her life. He would see her, not for himself but for her.

Sliding open the door to see Sesshoumaru sitting next to her holding her hand as she fitfully slept on. It both angered him to see him with her and made him feel shameful. He went in and sat next to her on the other side. 

Stirring again, she opened her eyes. They were dull and glazed over but staring not at either man. Her gaze was on her fuzzy Kuma. "Hi little guy." 

The puppy licked under her chin wagging his tail. She lifted her hand and rubbed his head as he settled back down in his spot. Botan came in with a tea set and sat at the other side of the room as he prepared it for her. 

Kai turned her head and looked up at Sesshoumaru. Lips missing their normal pink fullness as well as her skin missing its rosey tone. Giving him a weak lopsided smile he somehow felt she was going to be okay.

"I think I'm gonna stick around." In the moment he didn't care who was around and smiled. Katsuo looked on at something he had never seen unless Sesshoumaru was in battle. Leaving him to feel somewhat unsettled.

"You are strong, for a little human." She rolled her eyes at him and turned her head sensing someone else.

"I need the Daku sword." Botan interrupted her before she could continue. 

"let's get you up so you can drink this and change your bandage." Sesshoumaru lifted her up as she winced in pain. Botan pulled the blankets back to reveal to her horror she was naked in front of three of the closest men in her life.

"I change my mind." Her voice was strained and breath harsh. "Let me die." Trying to cover herself only to realize she was far too weak to even manage that, instead just closing her eyes. Botan brought the cup to her lips making her drink. 

"Oh holy hell." Leaning her head back against Sesshoumaru's shoulder to feel him move behind her as she broke into a cold sweat and passed out in his arms.

"At least we got some herbs in her before that happened." Taking off the wrapping to see how she had healed so far. It looked much the same as it did the day before but had stopped bleeding. "Katsuo, do you think your healing would benefit her now that she has stopped bleeding?" He nodded and came to sit on the otherside of her while Botan washed it gently removing the salve.

"Lets just not tell her about this part." Licking thoroughly to make sure it was drenched well enough and sitting back on his feet. He helped dress the wound and wrap it back up again.

"Have you told her of the sword?" He laid her down and Kuma snuggled back against her. 

"no. I thought perhaps you had. It's still safe, resting." It had to mean trouble if she was asking for it. 

"Hn." He wanted to know more but without her awake that wasn't possible. 

Sleeping on through the day into the night she awoke again to having Kuma nuzzling back into his spot with cold paws. She felt much better than she did the last time was conscious. 

"Can i have something to eat?" Botan got up and went down to the kitchen to get her something.

"Why did you ask for the Daku sword?" She looked up at Sesshoumaru. 

"The Orb showed me what i needed. I think we will have to use it to fight whoever that guy is. He still hasn't found what he is looking for and growing even more impatient." Groaning in pain and needing a moment breathe. 

"Im not sure we can stop the events from happening anymore." If only they would just show her where he was, she could go talk to him. Maybe help him find what he was searching for and stop everything. 

"I will defeat any who oppose me and protect the west." Thats her Lord Fluffy, smiling up at him.

"I know. Oh, the baby will be born a little early. We should take Rin up there next week instead of in two. He is just ready to be out in the world." She took a deep breath again.

"Kagome looked like she was carrying a whole watermelon, poor woman." It was rather interesting being half dead. Spirits kept her company, Izayoi mostly and even showed her a mirror where they went through it and were with Inuyasha and his family. It was an amazing experience but knew it was over for her.

"Very well, i will take her but you will stay." He didnt think she realized how injured she was or that she just wasn't thinking clearly enough.

"you say that but i know i get to go." She was lying to get her way, he knew. Mischievous little human even in poor condition.

Bringing her hand up to rub her eye as she yawned, she couldnt help but wonder why she still felt so tired. She had knocked the blanket down off her breast, unnoticed and he brought it back up to cover her. "I was hoping that part was a nightmare." 

"You should not care about something so trivial." Scowling at him as Botan returned with a small bowl of soup and another pot of tea.

"Easy for you to say." Groaning from pain again. It was so intense making it hard to breathe and frustrating her. "The whole world didn't see your naked body." 

He knew she was going to be alright if she was being this dramatic over something so small, not that they were small or that he noticed.

"I'm sure Katsuo found your body pleasing." As she tried to set him on fire with her mind and failing, Botan brought over the soup as Sesshoumaru held her so she could drink it. It was very nice to have something in her stomach. 

"Alright now let's drink some more midnight tea." She wanted to vomit just thinking of the taste and shook her head no.

"that tastes so bad." Laughing as he went over and pulled out a small pot and a small spoon, adding honey.

"When can i get a bath and clothes?" He brought the cup to her lips as she brought a shaky hand to try to help.

"Lets see how well you are doing tomorrow. I suspect your wound to heal a little faster with Katsuo's help." Thank everything holy she was about to sleep the mortification she was feeling away. She just groaned more out of the thought of what had all occurred than the pain of being laid back down.

"You dont have to stay with me. The West needs you and all im doing is sleeping anyway." She felt a little guilty him being there probably bored out of his mind trapped into caring for her too.

"Do you want me to stay?" She wanted to say no, wanted to not currently be a burden due to her own stupidity.

"Always." Is what came out of her traitorous mouth instead. That warm fuzzy feeling taking over as she began to drift off again, this time to the dreaming world. The feeling of her hand once again being taken in his as she gently grasped his fingers. 

Katsuo came and was glad to hear she had been doing better. Helping treat her wound, he would like to see her up and moving soon. Sesshoumaru allowed himself to sleep that night knowing she would still be there came morning.

....

She awoke the next afternoon and sent to sitting herself up. Her color was still pale but her strength seemed to be returning and her eyes were much brighter.

"So about that bath." Grasping the blanket to her chest with a shaky hand and a soft smile.

"If you feel strong enough." He doubted she thought it through, that she would need more help than just to be carried to the bathhouse.

"That responsibility falls on pack, Sesshoumaru." Botan laughed heartily at knowing what was to come. "I'll make a mixture for you to help with pain but will not make you sleepy. Though it may make you feel... odd. You may return to your room afterward and i will come redress your wound."

"Why do i feel like I'm missing something?" As she was handed a cold drink in a little cup, she eyed the two men as she drank it. Overly sweet and tasting of blueberries, she liked this one much better.

"You will require assistance." Rising to his feet and carefully gathering her in his arms wrapped in the blanket. 

"I will not. Just drop me off and call it good." Traveling down the stairs to the left and walking across the castle she was thankful they didn't run into anyone. 

"Do not be stubborn." Reaching the bathhouse and opening the doors by sliding them open with his foot and closing them again. 

It was her favorite place. A cove in the rock face of the moutain with a natural hot spring inside that had been enclosed and made into a luxury bathhouse. He sat her down at the water's edge and went over to the bench and began to undress.

"Kami, keep your clothes on!" way entirely too screechy than either of them would have preferred. 

"I do not wish for my clothing to be wet." Maybe she did die and now was having to pay some sort of penance. Though she was beginning to care less and less and feeling pretty fucking good.

"Just bring the soap i like and dont pretend you dont know which." Uncurling the blanket and slipping in the water only slightly scraping her back against the rock. More graceful than usual.

She looked over to see his feet and noticed his ankle stripes as he handed her a washcloth and the chamomile and lavender soap. She took it and quickly looked away as he stepped in and sat next to her on the ledge. 

"Can't you go over there being all naked." She began to soap herself and already felt a bit lightheaded. 

"No." Dipping his hair in the water and using the odorless soap she knew he used. Rin had told her all about how it was special made for the Inu to use.

Getting half washed, she leaned back resting her head on the rock. She was moving too fast for her body to catch up and needed a moment or two. Figuring she lost more blood than she had thought if it was taking this long to get on her feet.

"Are you alright?" Placing his arm behind her and grabbed her hip as she started to slide into the water.

"Just a little dizzy. I moved too fast i think." Okay so maybe they were right. She still wasn't ever going to admit that to them though. "I dont think I've ever seen you with wet hair before."

"I am going to finish washing you." There he went being all Lord Fluffy the commanding. 

"I think you just wanna touch my glorious nakedness some more." She laughed heartily, she was feeling super great right about now and a little bit mischievous. He pulled her from the wall and dipped her hair in the water cupping some to bring over her head and completely ignoring her statement. 

Soaping her hair as she sat up again on her own. She didnt fight him, he was good at it so why fight it? After he finished she pushed off the rock and floated on her back.

"I'm a mermaid now. so you can go." Weightlessly floating about as he sat back and watched her, waiting for her to either find trouble or grow bored. As well as avoiding the thoughts the curves of her body tried to invade in his mind. 

"Are you finished?" She looked over at him and stuck her tongue out at him. 

"Nope." kicking lazily further away from him, further than he would have liked her to be in this condition.

"Come. You are beginning to bleed." Looking down at her side and seeing the blood slowly dripping through the bandages. 

"Good, maybe ill turn red and finally have some color to me." Realizing she was too far gone for reason he waded towards her and captured in his arms.

"You are finished here." She tried to pull his ear but found it too difficult, instead pulling a lock of hair.

"Pull my hair again, little human and i will nip you." Did he really just threaten to bite her? Interesting. He placed her on the bench and handed her a towel as he toweled off and started to put on his clothes.

"You'd really bite me?" Pulling on her robe and looking up at him while wrapping her hair in the towel, sorta. 

"nip. It is what Inu do to reprimand unruly pups." She tried to stand and had to sit back down again, not that what she did could even be considered standing. Growing annoyed with her body not working the way she wanted it to.

"So I'm a child to you?" He picked her up and began towards her room.

"no. however, you are unruly." She reached up and grabbed his hair and tugged as she looked into his eyes. He bent down and nipped her neck which tickled more than anything and made her laugh. Reaching her room and placing her on her bedding.

"Grab me some clothes oh, mighty Lord Sesshoumaru." He was glad she was feeling better and had to remind himself he was. Grabbing a nightgown and underwear for her and coming to place them next to her.

Disrobing and trying to put her nightgown on, he came over and helped her head find the hole. He thought back to the day he watched her struggle putting on her hoodie all those months ago. "Do you always have this much trouble dressing?" 

"Just dress me, jerk." She felt really dizzy again and needed to lie down as soon as possible. Lying back as he helped her slip her underwear on. She giggled a bit "I doubt you've had a woman ask you to dress them."

"It is only fair since I am the one who undressed you." He took the towel and finished drying her hair with it, she didn't need a cold as well.

"You're just all about me being naked, aren't ya?" Giving a cheesy grin as he pulled the covers up over her.

He went to the door and opened it to fetch Botan as well as ask him not to give her that herb again. "I will return."

She finally felt warm and toasty and wanted to stay that way. A little while later hearing the door slide open she looked to see Katsuo walk in. 

"Im glad you are feeling better, Kai." Coming over to sit on the futon with her. "I was worried about you."

She smiled up at him as she tried to sit up, he stopped her. "Dont waste your energy on me. I'm actually glad we are alone. i want to apologize for allowing you to get hurt while under my care. I should have never allowed such a thing to happen."

"It's not your fault. You should know by now I'm accident prone. It was only a matter of time before i got stabbed." She chuckled and smiled big for him.

"You shouldn't be so forgiving. Is there anything i can do for you?" She thought about it for a minute and came up with the only thing she could think of at the time.

"Brush my hair? Its almost dry but i usually brush it after i bathe. Which don't ask about the bath." He smiled knowing it must have been an awkward bath with the prince of ice himself.

"I would have gladly bathed you myself if i didn't think he would kill me for it. I'm surprised he didn't have Botan do it." She sat up while he grabbed the brush off her vanity and came to sit behind her.

"Botan said it fell on pack before he could even demand it. Which reminds me, i keep asking him but he avoids the question, what is his scent?" Hearing him snort as he began to brush her sandy blonde hair.

"An ice storm with undertones of a hardwood fire. He hated it so much growing up. All the others just teased him saying it fit the ice prince with the way he is." He started to laugh again. 

"Thats not nice, quit it." He kissed her cheek as an apology. "and keep your lips to yourself."

Botan and Sesshoumaru came in with Botan carrying bandages for her. To her, Sesshoumaru looked annoyed and she guessed she knew why. Either hearing about his scent or about him needing to keep his lips to himself.

"What's Botan's scent like?" Taking back to his task he sighed knowing she was going to ask about everyone now.

"The forest with fresh air." he sniffed deeply. "and a little bit of his mate who smells like an orange tree." Botan came and kneeled next to her.

"Aw thats sweet. I wish i had youkai sense of smell." He looked a bit uncomfortable at the mention of his mate which he hadn't ever before, she wondered why.

"If you'd like, take a sniff." he leaned his head forward and to the side exposing his neck to her. Burying her nose in his neck and taking a deep breath.

"oh wow! you really do and i smell the oranges too." her eyes lit up and had a big smile on her face. Katsuo laughed at how something so simple made her so happy.

"careful now or your mate might get jealous of this pretty woman's scent being on your neck." Standing to return the brush and coming to sit next to her again.

"we have been mated six hundred years. even if you rubbed yourself on my neck he wouldn't get jealous." having let his guard down before he realized it he looked into her eyes expecting disgust as most of the others had shown over the years.

"oh is that why you dont have children?" she laughed and felt relieved. she always tried to avoid the topic after asking one day because she thought it was from infertility. 

"yes, my dear. youkai men are like human ones and do not bear young." he was happy she didn't reject him but rather confused by her reaction.

"oh i figured that. Why not adopt? Ive got five kids I'm trying to find homes for. well one of them i kinda wanna keep for myself. oh crap, i didn't say that last part." Sesshoumaru was intrigued and liked the idea of trying to find out which one she wanted.

"We have tried before but people don't normally give children to a couple of our... uniqueness." That made her sad, she hadnt taken the time to think how hard it would be for a gay couple in this era.

"It's my haven and i can adopt to whoever i want. Two fathers would work great for any of them. Talk it over and let me know. I leave in five days for Inuyasha's so the sooner the better or you have to wait til I get back." She leaned a little to try to give a small hug knowing what the look was for now and happy things came out.

"You are not going." She just glared at Sesshoumaru, whatever, she was going.

"Alright lets get you licked and wrapped." Botan helped pull her nightgown up to just below her breasts as to not expose her. Katsuo wasn't getting another peek at her if she could help it.

Unwrapping her and removing the bandage that had a blood stain all the way through it. Botan gave her the stern look she knew too well from him and she pouted.

"You overdid it. You should have let him wash you. Next time it is advised you let him." He knew she was probably difficult and was the one person Sesshoumaru couldn't force to submit. 

"I want to say I'm sorry but I'm not." Feeling lightheaded again she put a hand behind her to keep her up. Sesshoumaru came behind her and held her shoulders as Katsuo came to give her a good licking. She couldn't help but laugh at the whole mildly porn situation she was in. It was ridiculous.

"Try not to move too much." He bent his head down and began to lick her wound gently. All but a small part had already scabbed over. He couldn't do anything to stop the bleeding but licked anyway hoping it would do something. She leaned further back into Sesshoumaru's arms as she felt the cold sweat starting to come on again.

"Feeling faint again I suspect. We are almost done and then you can sleep. I'll make you some starlight tea after this." He bandaged her up and wrapped her again with Katsuo's help.

Heart pounding in her ears and the cold sweat in full swing she was relieved as she was laid back down. Sesshoumaru moved the hair out of her face and off her neck to try to cool her face while covering her body with a blanket to warm that part again. 

Rin had a similar experience when she got sick one winter and described it as her face hot and body cold. He was grateful his daughter described things humans experienced for him, even more so now.

"What...what do I taste like?" Maybe if she kept her mind off of what was happening she could avoid fainting as she began to shiver.

"Your blood tastes like the steel of a blade with a mix of something sweet I'm not familiar with. Your skin is wonderful. It has a slight taste of honey and the ocean." He smiled even though her eyes were closed.

"Interesting. I wonder what Fluffy tastes like." She couldn't hold on anymore and passed out again. 

"Well, Fluffy. I guess I need to lick you." He started to lean towards Sesshoumaru with his tongue out and was smacked onto his back. He laughed hard having trouble catching his breath. "If you don't let me lick you, let her! I think you'd enjoy it!"

....

The next day Rin came in with Kuma and kept her company as Sesshoumaru went back to do Lord things. It was nice to not be completely bored. 

She had some more of the blueberry mix which Botan called Blue Dragon. Which he showed her the herb looked like a tiny blue dragon and she was fascinated by it.

Kuma played with Kata as they bounced and played while Rin went on all about everything she missed over the last few days. Aki had taken her to the haven so Rin could keep up with things in her place. She was grateful and proud of how responsible she was.

"Kai, do you think it's wrong of me to like more than one boy at the same time?" Laying on her stomach next to Kai who sat propped against the wall eating strawberries.

"Not at all. Especially at your age." The pets grew tired and curled up together on the futon by her feet.

"Well, how do you know which one you're supposed to be with then?" That was the question wasn't it? Every woman has asked herself this at one point in her life.

"I think you just do. Picture which one you would want to see every single morning. If it makes you happy then most likely they're the one. The other part is just knowing in your heart once you explore that line of thought. Besides you're still young and don't have to choose anyone yet." Popping a nice big strawberry in her mouth, savoring the sweet taste.

"You sure know a lot." Smiling as she looked up at Kai with the sweet smile she always wore.

"Nah, I know very little. Your father, now he knows a lot. Botan and Makio decided to adopt one of our kids. They're going up there tomorrow afternoon. I think I'm gonna have your father take me too. I really miss them." She scooted to lay back down feeling lightheaded again. She was really over this whole body betrayal.

"I've got sewing lessons with Aki, tomorrow afternoon. I like them though so it's okay that I don't get to go." She always seemed to find the silver lining in things. Kai hoped she always kept that.

"I think I'm about ready for a nap. What about you?" Snuggling further under the covers as Rin got up.

"I'm not really tired. I'll come back though, promise." Bending down to kiss the top of her forehead and picking up Kata.

"Alright. I'll see you later then." She couldn't help but giggle at being mothered by a teen. 

Rin left and Kai closed her eyes drifting into a deep sleep. A well deserved one she felt. Hours passed and she awoke again to Katsuo coming in holding a few different things in his hands.

"I finished for today and was wondering how you are." He came over and set next to her on the bedding and set down all the items but a small cup.

"Much better. Rin came and kept me company until I took a nap. I haven't fainted once today." She smiled as she sat herself up against the wall. Though not fainting was a weird goal to have.

"That's wonderful, Kai. Botan said I could change your bandage since I've helped enough times. First, some Blue Dragon." He handed her the small cup of delicious herbs. She took it and drank it all.

"That tastes so good. I wonder if he has one that tastes like strawberries. They're my favorite, which I have to say I'm surprised there are any this late in winter." He took the cup back and placed it on the floor. 

"They're youkai strawberries. We have a few secrets humans don't know about. Such as fruit that grows year round." She guessed she didn't know because she never asked about it. Just thought maybe some sort of magic was involved.

"What else don't I know?" He leaned back against the wall as well and put his arm around her.

"I can control water. It doesn't come in handy much around here since the ocean is on the other side of the mountain. I can take you swimming this summer if you'd like and show you." Swimming in the ocean sounded great. 

"I'd like that. My dad used to take me every year. My mom hated sand so it was one thing we did together, just us." She missed her parents a lot. It had been a long time since she heard either of their voices.

"What happened to them?" He tucked her hair behind her ear as she laid her head on his shoulder.

"Well, my parents were a little older when they got me. My dad was fifty two and my mom forty seven. My dad, about three months after turning seventy had a stroke and ended up dying from it. It's sorta a bleed in your head." She didn't care to go into the whole blood clot in the brain thing. She'd had far enough of it when it happened. 

"My mom, wasn't long after. She died of a heart attack within six weeks of him passing. I think her heart just was too broken without him. I'm okay with it all now but I miss them. I think everyone does when they lose someone though." He kissed her temple and squeezed her gently. 

"You are an amazing woman." He wondered why she didn't speak about them more often. Maybe it was too painful, she always seemed so happy and not thinking abut the painful parts of her life was probably part of that.

"So, you going to lick me again?" It didn't matter how she tried to say it, it was coming out bad no matter what.

"Yes and wrap you all on my own. Probably not as well as Botan but I think I'll manage well enough." She chuckled as he released her and gathered what he brought. She lifted her nightgown up and he couldn't help but pause.

Her skin had the healthy pink to it again and well it was a bit of a distraction. Unwrapping her and taking off the bandage, he bent down and licked her healing wound. It looked healthy and healing well which made him feel relived but not easing the guilt.

Her skin tasted so delicious he wanted to lick every part of her. Knowing she would probably hit him if he tried, he leaned back and placed the new bandage and wrapping on her. 

"Would you let me kiss you, if I asked?" Him asking permission? She knew she must be on some good drugs because that didn't seem real.

"You are so single minded. I tell you what. Tomorrow I want to go to the haven with Botan and Makio. If Sesshoumaru won't take me, I want you to. Because I will be going even if I have to walk. And if you take me I'll give you a kiss." The thought of her giving him one made it worth the knowledge of the trouble it would cause him with Sesshoumaru.

"It's a deal. I hope he says no so I can taste your lips again." She smacked him on the chest as he settled back against the wall. 

"You are too much." Laying her head back on his shoulder. He didn't care that he was smiling like an idiot at the thought she would kiss him. Knowing there was no way Sesshoumaru was going to take her.

"I am just fine with that." They continued on to talk about different things in their lives. Feeling to her she was really getting to know him and it wasn't just him trying to get in her pants, even if she wasn't wearing any. She finally felt they were true friends. 

...

Kai awoke feeling like a brand new woman. It was a bright day and she was happy because she was getting to see her kids. 

Managing to take a bath on her own, okay with Rin's help but that still counted. She dressed, brushed her hair and it felt great. On her mission of getting Fluffy to take her to the haven she skipped the Blue Dragon to make sure she had a clear head. She would often get side tracked while it was in her system and this was worth the pain. 

Opening the door to his study and going over to sit next to him as he looked over a letter on the table. He looked up at her and was glad to see her color having returned to normal.

"You look well." She nodded and smiled at him. 

"I feel well. I've come to ask you to take me to the haven with you this afternoon. Please." Using manners? His little human must be wanting to go badly. 

"No." Breathe, you can't actually kill him, he's not human. Trying not to let her smile slip then a little thought popped in her head.

"Very well then. I guess I'll have Katsuo take me. I promised a kiss if he would figuring you would say no. So either way I'm going today. Just know it's your fault my lips will be on his." If she knew one thing about him and well, Inu generally, it was that he was possessive.

"You freely give your body away for something as small as this?" Yes, take the bait.

"It's just a kiss. It can be a sweet innocent thing, a kiss isn't giving my body away." Wait a minute. "Have you ever kissed anyone before?" 

"We are not discussing me, we are discussing you." Visibly annoyed with the entire conversation and wanting her to give up and go lay back down to heal.

"I don't think you have. With the conversations we've had about the smell of fear and just not being interested in that stuff. It's okay if you haven't." She thought for a moment and he could see that look she got when she was thinking hard about something. "I'll kiss you."

"Why?" She scooted closer to him and rose on her knees to be eye level with him.

"Because. That way when you find a nice youkai woman you will have the awkward first kiss out of the way and know what to expect." Moving her face closer to his, he could feel the warmth of her breath grazing his skin.

"You speak nonsense." She only smiled, far too committed to her noble cause. 

"Maybe." Whispering against his lips as she pressed hers to his. 

Her lips felt soft and warm, stopping his heart for a beat. He felt as if he had been struck by lightning. Grabbing her around her waist, pulling her closer, deepening the kiss. His other hand cupping her jawline and neck. She tasted of wild strawberries and honey, he wanted more, to devour her very essence, needing her. Feeling his control slipping he reluctantly pulled away from her. 

Thankful she buried her face in his kimono giving him time to regain himself as well. Trying to slow his heartbeat and not listen to hers thundering away. This was a very big mistake.

"Wow. Okay. Wow. Yeah, you could have just told me. You didn't need to teach me some lesson." As she pulled away Jiro came in with some tea and breakfast. She didn't think she could have been more embarrassed up until that moment.

"Are you pups done or should I come back later?" He didn't bother waiting for a response as he set it down and left. She was wrong.

"I've made an ass of myself enough for an entire day and I still have much of it left. I'm going to go lay down." Avoiding eye contact at all cost as she rose to her feet and clutched her side as she did. 

"Be ready this afternoon." Her hand was on the door and she smiled to herself.

"Thanks." Sliding the door open and leaving quickly without looking back.

He leaned back against the wall with his jaw clenched tight. This shouldn't have happened. He shouldn't have let it happen, it was his fault. Asking himself why did he let it happen, even though he knew the answer he refused to accept it. He wanted to kiss her. He was disgusted with himself for taking advantage of her when she wasn't thinking clearly from having Blue Dragon. Which just angered him even more. He rose to go for a hunt in his natural form.

....

The pain was worse but she was glad she had been without anything. There was something there and it made her heart beat faster thinking about it and drop when she realized it was most likely one sided and slight panic set in.

She had basically assaulted him, he was teaching her some lesson about assuming things or just humoring her. It was nothing at all, right? Did he want there to be something more? 

It didn't matter anyway, she wasn't a youkai and certainly nothing special enough for him. Maybe these new feelings would disappear if she ignored them long enough. Yeah, just ignore everything and it'll go away.

Kuma wagged his tail as she gingerly laid down on her bedding and he cuddled up with her. The small cup of Blue Dragon on top of the chest looked pretty fucking good right about now but that involved getting up again. It hurt and in more than one way. She had royally fucked up. Groaning as she buried her face under a blanket feeling sick a heartsick teenager again. Falling asleep instead of getting up for the herb mixture.

Waking up to a knock at the door. It was Botan coming to see how she was before he left for the haven.

"I get to go too. Sesshoumaru said he'd take me." He came and kneeled on the floor next to her and checked for a fever.

"I have to say I'm surprised he would agree. You know how protective he is of you and Rin." So a little white lie here wasn't going to hurt.

"I told him if he didn't take me, I'd kiss Katsuo for him to take me instead. I don't think he liked the idea very much." He chuckled of course he wouldn't. 

"That would do it. As long as you take it easy you'll be just fine." See, she had healer approval. 

"This evening can I have some of that Starlight tea so I can sleep well?" She decided she had gone this far without anything might as well try to make it until the evening but would definitely need something so she could sleep. 

"Of course. I'll make sure to give it to Jiro to prepare. Now, come on, if you're still going." He stood and held out his hand to help her up. Walking toward the study they met Sesshoumaru and his second, Makio on the way.

"We were just about to come find you two." Avoiding looking at him first she looked to Makio who also had feather hair but in a dark blue with silver eyes as well. He was as tall as Katsuo was and skin was dark tan as well. 

"I'm Kai. It's nice to meet you, Makio." She smiled at him while still avoiding looking at the tall silver haired man standing beside her. 

"Nice to meet you too, Kai. I've heard quite a bit about you and it's nice to put a face to the name." Botan nudged him with his shoulder as to say 'shut up' as Makio laughed.

"I will carry you." Great now just the sound of his voice made her heart rate increase. This was going to suck.

"Okay. Great. Perfect." What she really wanted was to bang her head against anything thirty times so she'd stop rambling.

They walked outside and the two men transformed into giant birds. She figured they would have but was still very impressed. She was quickly picked up under her legs and shoulders and whisked away into the sky above. She wished desperately it wasn't suddenly so romantic of an action.

Looking down at the woman in his arms to see her face covered in his mokmoko. Not knowing if he was grateful or disappointed he couldn't see her it. He needed to get over these feelings and quickly. 

They soon arrived and Kai made introductions of everyone and explained everything to the children. The twins had lots of questions which she wasn't surprised about in the least. They were fascinated by every aspect of them. She about had a coughing fit when Jin asked which one would be the mom. It didn't help when Makio thumbed toward Botan, that man certainly had a sense of humor.

Sesshoumaru chose to stay outside and she was glad he did. She needed to focus and it was tough enough as is with the pain growing. She didn't need her new girly crush affecting her as well. Leaving them to get to know the children, she sat out on the porch with Nobou soon joining her.

"It's worse than they said it was. Are you really alright?" She leaned her head on his shoulder and chuckled a bit.

"Oh yes. I just haven't had any herbs today and I'm in a little bit of pain. Other than that I'm good." It was like him to worry. He was a gentle soul, one of the many things she liked about him.

"I was worried about you." She grabbed his hand and squeezed gently.

"Don't you worry one bit. I'm not going anywhere. I've got Sesshoumaru to protect me and this stupid ball to make me live forever. I'll always be right here for you." She would be and for any of the children too. Even if they were never truly hers, to Kai, they would be.

He filled her in on everything she missed while she was recovering and she felt like she had been gone an entire month. Chiho was trying to walk and almost got the hang of it. Jin accidentally set Junji's hair on fire which made him set Jin's hair on fire on purpose. Luckily both came out with just slightly shorter pony tails. Soji was teaching the pups commands and took to training them very easily. 

Before she knew it hours flew by. Kai said her goodbyes to the children and as well as her friends. Watching as they transformed and flew home. Botan making a large loop showing off just for her. 

Grabbing the end of mokmoko and twirling a lot slower than last time, he picked her up as she looked into his eyes for the first time since. Their eyes met and they both had the feeling of wanting another kiss. Sesshoumaru looked up and took off. He was not weak and would not submit to such feelings as she tumbled in further against her better judgement.

....

Arriving back to have the evening meal with Rin, who showed off a little collar she made for Kata during her lesson. She had liked the idea after Kai had a ribbon around Kuma's neck.

She was really starting to hurt and it was getting difficult to pretend it didn't. Barely making it to when Rin retired for her bath and bedtime routine. She laid down as Jiro brought in the tea for them. Really wanting to just bail on the whole thing but forcing herself to stay and pretend the morning incident didn't happen at all.

"Which do you think they will choose as their own?" He handed her the cup of Starlight tea made just for her. As she leaned up to drink it nearly gulping it down.

"I'm not sure. I think the twins took a liking to them. Even more so Makio after finding out he's a warrior." She laughed thinking about how he would get those boys into behaving even though himself seemed a bit mischievous. Botan would have his hands full with those three.

"They would benefit the most having two fathers." Kai snorted. Wasn't that the truth? If he thought she was unruly he must have come up with a new name for them altogether.

"I think so too. I kinda think it'll be one of the boys since they are older kids and both of them work during the day. The girls are still young enough to need someone home." Moving over to place her head on his thigh, the feeling of normalcy beginning to return. 

"You are in pain. You shouldn't have gone." Yep, back to normal with his statements of the obvious instead of the 'I told you so'.

"Well yeah, I haven't had anything for the pain today. It's more from that than going to the haven. Not like I did anything other than sit around there." He felt less disgusted with his actions earlier in the day knowing now she was in her clear mind. It didn't change things for him though. It was still his own irresponsibility for the feelings he needed to fight, she was just being her.

"You are still staying here when I take Rin." She closed her eyes feeling warm all inside. 

"You say that but I know I get to go." He chuckled at her stubbornness, too much to just do as told.

"Do you need me to carry you to bed?" Yawning as she nodded and lifted her arms up to grab his neck not opening her eyes, smacking him in the face on accident. His graceful little human.

Picking her up and taking her to her room, he placed her on the bed. She struggled to untie her obi and began to undress as she half muttered "nightgown."

He retrieved one for her as she looked up at him with her big blue sleepy eyes, smiled and took it. He wanted to be far from this situation, for her to look far less beautiful than she did in that moment. 

Watching her slip it on over her head and attempt to get under the covers and failing. He should just leave and let her sort out her battle with the bedding. Instead he helped her under the covers and smoothed her hair as she drifted off fully to sleep. Telling himself it was because she was his pack not because of anything more.

....

"Good morning, Kai. Did you sleep well?" People really needed to learn to stop waking her up. Botan was pushing his luck right about now.

"I was til you woke me up." She sat up rubbing her eyes trying not to be too rude, he did save her life.

"Let's see how you are doing today." Lifting her nightgown and unwrapping her bandage. She was entirely not awake enough for this as she held up her clothing so it was out of his way.

"Did you two decide last night? If not you're just gonna have to take all of them, that's the rules." She smiled as he laughed and continued his work.

"Wow, you have managed to heal very well. I think in another day it will just be a scar and not scabbed over." It was amazing what Katsuo had done for her. Even with his help, he never expected it to heal this fast.

"You didn't answer my question. So five kids it is." He took to rewrapping her and sat back.

"We have chosen to take the twins. I think they will be a good fit for us." Beaming with joy at finally getting to have the family he wanted to have.

"I leave the day after tomorrow. So let me know when you are ready for them. They won't need much, I'll send their beddings and they have plenty of clothing. All they need is a little bit of space and lots of love." Covering herself back up with the blankets as he handed her a cup to drink for the pain, which was considerably less this morning.

"This evening or is that too soon?" She laid back down and got comfortable again.

"You tell me, their your kids." Yawning as she closed her eyes. It was much too early for her tastes.

"This evening then. Thank you, Kai. Thank you." He gathered his things and left her to go back to sleep until a more decent hour, well for her.

....

"This is exciting!" Rin couldn't wait to go. Kai had put together a little celebration for the evening meal with the children and was putting everything together. She had gotten each of them a small carving of a little fox as a goodbye gift as well. Of course this wasn't forever good bye, more of an ending of a chapter. 

Sesshoumaru even joined at the table in the haven for the meal after Rin begged for him to, relenting after she said how much of an honor for the boys it would be. 

It was a happy occasion for everyone. Nobou told her it gave the rest of them hope that the two got adopted after her taking a role in the haven. That made her get truly special for him to say that.

Arriving back at the castle both humans worn out, Rin nearly asleep getting off Ah-Un. Sesshoumaru carried her to her room as Kai tucked her in. 

Leaving Rin's room and closing the doors behind her to see golden eyes staring down at her.

"What?" He started walking down to where they normally ate their meals so she followed.

"You did well." She was pleased to know he felt she had done a good job. He took pride in how things ran in his lands and it was meaningful to her.

"Thanks. What did we come here for?" He poured some sake into a cup for her and handed it over. 

"Humans like this for celebrating." She laughed as she drank a bit of it. The way he worded things sometimes amused her.

"That is true. What do youkai drink if not sake?" He poured himself something out of different bottle so she knew it had to be different.

"Youkai wine. It is not for little humans." Coming to sit next to her in front of the fire. 

"Let me taste." He gave her the rare eyebrow raise that he usually gave whenever she said something incredibly questionable.

"A small cup could get a grown human man drunk." Rolling her eyes and giving an equally impressive eyebrow raise.

"Just a taste not cup." Not caring for him to give her more human versus youkai bullshit, she dipped her head down and licked the liquid. It tasted, to her, like strawberry wine.

"I like it. Strawberry is my favorite." He chuckled at her statement. Of course he knew her favorite flavors by now.

"Have you ever gotten drunk off it?" He seemed way too responsible but who knows, maybe he had a few times.

"No." She figured maybe he was always the way he is now. It sounded like it from Katsuo's stories at least.

"I think I want a dragon of my own. Maybe a black one and definitely one head. That way I don't have to take up so much of your time and can just go to the haven whenever." Taking her was never a bother to him, what was, was her seeming to want less time with him.

"Not a horse?" It was the more logical answer for a human if she was going to ask. So why a dragon instead?

"Hell no. They scare me. I don't know why people think they're this great majestic animal. They're bitey, poop all the time, kick people off of them and all around just terrible." For the first time he actually scented a small amount of fear from her just at the mention of her riding one.

"A dragon is less fearful?" She looked at him like he was the dumbest youkai ever to grace the face of the earth.

"Yes, dragons I can read. Horses... no. So do I get one?" Finishing off his cup and putting it down he smiled at her.

"No." She followed and finished hers, which didn't have much left anyway. 

"Ugh. Come on, you won't have to tote me around everywhere." Both wanting him to say yes so she could gain a bit of distance and no she could stay as close to him.

"I enjoy taking you." Frustrating man. One of the few times he admits to enjoying anything and it had to be that. 

He wanted her to stop asking for space from him by admitting it. Though he justified it as he was looking out for her safety. Who knew what kind of trouble she would manage to get into.

"You're so full of crap. You just think I'll get into trouble." She laughed and laid her head on his shoulder.

"Perhaps." They continued talking into the night like the often did before she had gotten herself into all that trouble. It felt nice to have normalcy returning again.

....


	16. Let's have a baby

"Take me." Looking down at him as Sesshoumaru laid on his back in his own bed. This shouldn't be happening.

"No." Watching as those soft pink lips pouted.

"Take me, please." There his little human went using manners and now puppy dog eyes.

"I will not repeat myself." Long hair cascading down her shoulders falling on his chest. He felt his resolve slipping.

"Then don't. Say yes instead and take me." The wicked smile she wore was nearly devestating to him. 

"And if I say yes?" She knew she had him hook, line and sinker.

"I'll be extra careful and listen to your every word. The whole time, promise." What was wrong with him that he couldn't say no to her? He really shouldn't.

"You will go easy on your body and let me handle things." She squealed too loudly for his enhanced hearing and she laid on her back as he propped himself up staring at her.

"Are you not going back to your room?" She got under his covers and gave him the 'do you have to ask?' look she liked to give him.

"No. I want to make sure you don't leave me behind in a few hours. Now lay down and go to sleep, we leave soon." Leaning over her to look her dead in the eye.

"I was asleep, a little human disturbed me." Only snorting as she pushed him back from her face.

"Whatever, Fluffy. Don't pretend you weren't actually expecting me to come ask you take me with you." He expected just hoped she wouldn't have.

"What if I had refused?" Already knowing the answer but wishing to let her know he already spoiled her plans.

"I was going to have Katsuo take me a little after you left. I will see the new baby." By the way he dawned a smirk on his handsome face she knew he was up to something.

"I have sent him to collect the Daku sword. It is a very long trip." Narrowing her eyes at him he half expected her to get mad. Instead she laughed fully.

"You know me too well. I'm going to have to up my game to surprise you." Turning on her left side and tucking the covers under her chin.

"Sleep." Laying back down beside her as she closed her eyes.

"Yes, my Alpha." Stroking his ego as she fell asleep with Kuma nudging the door open enough to wiggle in and plopping down next to her against her back.

Looking over at the furry thing now in his bed, the pup rolled over to show his belly in submission. At least he submitted, she never would.

....

Sunlight slowly drenching his room, Sesshoumaru opened his eyes to see her sprawled out on her stomach. Much like every morning he had to wake her. 

Getting up and dressing before he attempted to do such a task. He bent down and wiggled her toes. "Little human." 

She stirred pulling the covers over her head. Kuma got up and sat next to his feet and waited for a command. He wouldn't admit it but he liked the dog, a little.

"Awaken." Whining as she refused to move from the warm comfy spot she was in.

"If you wish to go, I will take you in what you are wearing." That snapped her head out of the covers with one eye open.

"Fine." She knew he would since he had before and it wasn't a very pleasant experience she cared to repeat, ever. Turning over and staring at her traitorous puppy who sat wagging his tail.

"Kuma." The two walked out of the room she assumed to go do bathroom necessities. Too sleepy to realize how easily her dog left and that Sesshoumaru took him willingly.

Slowly getting up and with very little pain she wandered over to her room. Dressing in her miko gear since she liked to have pants on while traveling. Opting to braid her hair in a single braid, resting down her left shoulder. 

Kai grabbed her small bag and her newest addition, a bag for Kuma to ride in. All be damned if he wasn't going with her. It was in a blue cotton made into a large sling bag where he could be snuggled with her like a kangaroo pouch. It was what she modeled it after. Aki had helped but she did most of the sewing the day before. Simple, quick, effective doggy pouch.

Sesshoumaru came and had Rin and of course, Kuma following behind him. She admired her pack, it made her feel happy. Suddenly missing having a phone to snap a picture. 

"Come Kuma." She bent down and scooped him up into the bag. He was still a puppy and much smaller than he should have been, currently, as she guessed, around five or six pounds. Very much her little fuzzy bear.

"Are you ready, Kai? I think I have everything I need for a longer stay. I can't wait to meet the new baby. When did you say he was coming?" She joined Rin while they traveled to the stables, holding onto Kuma like a pregnant woman her belly. Sesshoumaru couldn't help himself as he thought how wonderful she would look pupped, afterward burning the thought.

"Yeah I got everything. He should be born tomorrow morning maybe even when we arrive. I just know it's early tomorrow.

Reaching the stables with Ah-Un saddled and waiting for them. She briefly wondered if he was a normal dragon or if he was a rarity to have two heads. She would have to remember to ask later. 

He lifted Rin up after she strapped the bags to the dragon and placed her on the saddle. Instead of grabbing Kai by her waist like he did for Rin, he grabbed her thighs and placed her up behind his daughter. She realized then he was going to completely baby her the entire time.

They flew for the entire day, the girls enjoying the feeling of flight they never got to know on their own. Kuma popped his head out and looked as happy as any dog with the car window down. He certainly was a fearless.

After making camp and putting Rin and Kuma to bed Kai came over to sit with Sesshoumaru wrapped in a blanket up against the same tree.

"I'm excited about tomorrow. It's a great thing a new baby being born." Pulling her legs up to her chest and resting her chin on them.

"Pup." She took his correction as an agreement he was looking forward to it as well.

"Rin was telling me yesterday about how she is excited to be a mother one day. I think she would be amazing at it. I get the feeling she won't wait long until after she's sixteen though. It seems so young to me still but it's what's normal here." He didn't care to tell her that when he was growing, he was considered an adult at fourteen. Certainly didn't want to think about Rin considering motherhood at either age. 

"Perhaps she will wait." They both hoped she would. Everyone at sixteen believed they are fully grown and knew about the world. 

"Maybe. Maybe we need to accept our Rin is growing up." Our, Rin. It wasn't missed on him what she had said, it made him feel good to know she felt like his pack and it wasn't just in name only to her.

"Are you going to sleep?" She only shrugged her shoulders as she looked up at him.

"Kinda too excited. Babies tend to do that though." Looking back at the fire watching it dance in the night. 

"You should." She got up with huff as she eyed him the entire way to her bedding.

"Fine. Just know I'm sleeping just for you." Sticking her tongue out at him and she laid down and tried to sleep. She was tired but her brain didn't want to shut up long enough to let her sleep. So instead she closed her eyes and imagined all the snuggles she was going to get the next day.

....

They arrived in the late morning mostly due to neither woman even waiting for the sun to rise before getting moving again.

"Is the baby here yet?" Miroku sat outside the home watching the children play with a little ball.

"Should be anytime now." Kai went over to where the children were and knelt down on the ground.

"Look who I brought to come play." Pulling Kuma out and placing him on the ground in front of them. The children all swarmed the happy puppy as he wagged his tail and licked faces.

"I thought I smelled bastard. Good to see ya." Inuyasha came out and punched his brothers arm. Kai came over and hugged him much to his surprise, as did Rin which was less so.

"I'm so happy your baby is coming. Can we go see Kagome?" He nodded as Rin and Kai went inside. Songo was sitting next to her as she laid on the futon in obvious discomfort.

The girls went over and sat next to her. Kai smoothed her hair. "Not much longer. Is there anything I can do?" 

"Not really. Just got to get this little one out of me." She groaned as she twisted the sheets in her hands. "I think it's time. Get me up."

"Up? Up where?" Rin and Songo each grabbed an arm as Inuyasha rushed back inside and came behind her. They got her into a squatting position as Kaede came with more linens from the next room.

"Gravity. Oh, Kami." Was all Kagome could muster to spit out before another contraction came. 

"Would you like to see, Kai?" She looked at Kagome who nodded her permission as she went in front of her and looked at the emerging baby's head.

"The baby is coming. Now push, Kagome." Kaede readied a towel as Kagome was pushing and grunting to get him out. He was born within a matter of moments. Squatting seemed to be the way to go when having a baby.

They laid her down with Inuyasha behind her holding her propped up as the baby boy was put in her arms. Kagome smiled and cried all at once. It was the most wonderful thing Kai had ever had the honor of seeing. 

"You did great." Inuyasha kissed her temple as he looked as his wife and new son in his arms. 

Leaving the family to get cleaned up and all squared away she went outside. He was an amazing bloody ball of cuteness. White hair and smashed down doggy ears just like his father. 

"It appears we arrived just in time." He may have had his mask of indifference on but she saw in his eyes he was happy. Smiling like a big goofy idiot up at him, she hugged him. Over joyed with seeing the miracle of birth for the first time in real life.

"He's perfect. Just perfect." Never having known someone could be so happy for someone else was even possible.  
...

Everyone crowded into Songo and Miroku's for a late lunch giving Kagome and the new baby some quiet rest. 

Maceo came and sat next to Kai and looked up at her while they were eating. "You youkai?"

"Me? Why do you think so?" He grabbed her hair and began to play with the braid in his hands. 

"Hair, eyes and these." He pointed to her markings on her hands and arms. Pretty smart for a three year old.

"No. I got these markings when I was chosen from the orb. This big ball. My hair and eyes are different than the humans you have seen because my ancestors aren't from around here." He seemed satisfied with the answer and continued to play with her hair.

"Where from?" Well that was certainly a question she had often asked herself as well. She didn't really know and wasn't too sure how to answer but just gave a guess.

"I think maybe Ireland or Sweden. Somewhere the people have light hair and blue eyes like me. So far far away." Kuma came over to him and wiggled into his lap, so he dropped her hair and started petting him instead.

"Can I have dog?" Not her kid, she couldn't do what she wanted and go get him one of his own within the next five minutes. 

"Kuma? No, but if you want one of your own you should ask your dad." Yup, totally not handling that, Inuyasha can deal with it. She smiled as she saw the dreaded look on the face of Inuyasha pop up.

"I play wif Kuma." He got up with Kuma dangling happily in his arms and went over by his dad, presumably to ask for one of his own.

"You would have handed him a dog if you had an extra." Sesshoumaru leaned over and whispered in her ear. 

"In a heartbeat." He softly chuckled earning a panicked look from his brother.

"Perhaps I can send half a dozen." She nudged him in his armored ribs hurting her self on it, knowing he must be in a good mood if he was actually making jokes. Even in earshot of his little brother. They continued to enjoy their time there as the day wore on.

"It is time to leave." She rolled her eyes as she stood up. Of course it was time to leave, she only had half the baby snuggles she had wanted.

"Let me go say goodbye to Kagome if she's awake." Saying goodbye to everyone else before she left and made her way over to Kagome. She stopped outside the door when she noticed Sesshoumaru right behind her.

"I went down the street. I'm not going to get in trouble in such a short distance, you should stay for little longer with them." She laughed as she petted Kuma in the pouch.

"You weren't far last time and even with Katsuo, managed to nearly die." She growled at him, she was angry placing one hand on her hip.

"You still stuck on that? I was stabbed a week ago and look, I'm fine. You still blame him for it though, don't you?" Marching over and looking up at him. She thought they were passed this already.

"You do not? Trouble finds you and he should have been there." Of course he still blamed him, he would never forgive him for his recklessness.

"No I don't. None of this was his fault, it just happened." For the first time he looked as though he was angry. She didn't know if it was at her or at Katsuo. 

"Perhaps you do not blame him because you welcome him in your bed." She wanted to slap him she was so angry with him.

"I've told you plenty of times I don't want to be with him. Why the fuck do you care anyway?" She didn't wait for an answer and went inside leaving him behind. 

Kagome was laid down in her own bed in her room and looked amazing after having just given birth. The newest addition to the Inuyasha pack laying beside her as she stared at his sleeping face.

"He's beautiful, Kagome." Kneeling down beside their bed looking at the infant.

"I think so too. Are you two leaving so soon?" She looked into Kai's eyes and smiled, she knew Sesshoumaru never wanted to stay too long. She handed him over to her, placing him gently in her arms.

"Yeah. Otherwise I'd stay forever. These kids are addictive." Kagome laughed, its how she ended up with a family of her own so soon.

"Careful, baby fever might come and get you." She stroked her son's hair knowing how a new infant affected women.

"Oh, that hit me a long time ago. Do you mind if I give him a little kiss on the head?" Kagome nodded and couldn't help how kind she was to ask first. She bent down a kissed the boy's forehead and smoothed his hair back before handing him to his mother.

"Be careful, alright? The children need their auntie to be safe." Winking at Kai as her face lit up with a big smile, she hugged her and left their home. Somehow she had made her way into another family.

The entire way back to Ah-Un, she didn't speak to him. Lifting her up onto the saddle and she even avoided eye contact. He wondered how long was she going to be angry with him, more so why he so angry. 

Truth was, she wasn't angry but ashamed of the way she acted. He was just showing his concern in a very much Sesshoumaru way and felt she should have handled it better.

....

The silence for once was beginning to annoy him. She didn't speak the entire time through making camp, eating or even when she went to lay down. He wasn't going to be the one to break the silence however, he saw it as a battle of wills.

Sitting back against the large oak tree and staring at the stars, waiting for the night to pass. Kai rose to her feet leaving Kuma curled up under a blanket as she took another and wrapped up. 

He watched from the corner of his eye as she came and sat next to him, grabbing his arm and wrapping it around herself. Bringing her knees up as she nuzzled under his jawline.

"You really do smell like winter." Did she realize what she did was Inu way of apologizing within pack? "I love the smell of winter."

Laying her head on his armored chest, she sighed feeling bad for being rude with him and wondered how the whole thing got so out of hand so quickly.

"I don't want to feel like I damaged your relationship with him. You grew up together, I'm just me." Placing his hand on her shoulder he held her tighter. She wasn't just anything, she was Kai.

"You are more than you know." Closing her eyes and falling into a deep sleep as he continued to stare above. She was too forgiving, too sweet, too innocent. 

She slept the entire night in his arms, letting her sleep until she awoke on her own instead of waking her. Telling himself it was because she slept so little the night before.

....

"Let's walk for a while." She strapped her bag on the dragon and went to stand beside him, looking up into his eyes.

"We will arrive later." Shrugging her shoulders and walking off into the open field. The grass was still dead but being on the tail end of winter, it wasn't as cold as it had been.

"That's okay." Kai looked behind her to see him still standing where she left him. "Coming?"

"You are heading North." She laughed and pointed to her left, he just stared at her. How did she manage to find her way anywhere?

"How about I just follow you?" Picking Kuma up out of her pouch and putting him on the ground, watching as he promptly went over and waited by Sesshoumaru.

They walked for a few hours under the bright blue sky before stopping so she could rest and eat lunch. Kuma went over to yet another tree to pee on it.

"Sweetie, you ran out of pee about ten trees ago." Poor little guy was trying his hardest to mark every tree he saw.

Kai looked up and scanned the area around them. It looked familiar to her but she couldn't quite place why then it dawned on her. She stood and ran out to the field further and turned toward the low mountain. It was here that she saw in her first vision.

"It's here, here where they're going to come from under ground. Do you think they're under there right now?" Of all things he thought she would do, jumping up and down to test the ground beneath her was not one of them.

"Here?" She really needed to stop jumping, the ground could break under her and her body was... doing things. Walking over to her and placing a hand on her shoulder from behind her to stop all the bouncing.

"I'm positive. What do we do now? Give me a sword and we can go and take care of the problem." Staring down at her with a little confusion as to what she meant by 'we' there was no way she was ever going in there.

"We need to prepare." He knew to leave out the part where she would be safely tucked away, far away when the time came.

"Okay." She put her finger to her chin with a thought. "Can I see one of your swords?" 

Curiosity getting the best of him, he handed her Tenseiga at least she couldn't hurt herself with that one. Taking it she held it above her head with both hands and swung down. She reminded him of his brother, with a lack of finesse. She then swung around and cut downward again laughing as she fell on her ass. 

"Are you finished?" She couldn't speak but just handed the sword back up to him as she got back on her feet. Holding her hand to her side, a little too much activity for her.

"That was fun, I see why you have two." He swept a stray lock of hair behind her ear making her heart race.

"You have done too much." It was true, she shouldn't have gone jumping around like she had been but it was fun.

Returning to where they left the other two and beginning their journey home again. 

They arrived late in the night and Kai went straight to bed, even skipping a bath. Sesshoumaru went to his study and placed a marker on a map of where she said they would arrive from. Tempted to return that night and slay them all himself.


	17. I licked you too

CHAPTER 17

"You know, I just thought of something. I can't go in that cave place. It's got magma, it's much too hot for me." Seeming to come to reason on her own, for once. It would make it much less troublesome for him later.

"Indeed." Returning to eat his food as they both sat in their usual places, as well as Kuma in his. 

"When's Katsuo get back?" Poking the sushi down in front of her. She didn't care for it but always made a point to, at the very least, try what Jiro had made. Fish in general was her least favorite food.

"In a hurry to see your intended?" Giving him a small huff as she crossed her arms, she knew he was teasing her.

"He's not my intended anything." Suzu came in and bowed while giving her apologies for interrupting so late in the evening.

"It is correspondence from Miyoko." That woman irritated him even more than his mother did, he didn't care for anything from her. Nodding to Suzu and taking the letter he opened it and read:

'Dearest Sesshoumaru,

I hear you have collected another human pet. My you do have an odd obsession with those creatures. Do not get too attached, once we are mated they will need to be taken care of permanently.

All my love,  
Miyoko '

"An uneventful journey, two more days. You do not enjoy sushi." Kai couldn't bear to look up, she really didn't want to be any trouble at all. If she had, she would have seen how irritated he was from reading the letter.

"Not really, no. Who's Miyoko?" Sliding her food away from her and finishing her drink.

"Something else can be made. My mother proposed a mating after my birth to her family's first born daughter, Miyoko." Her thoughts had taken off without her control. She could see him with a beautiful youkai woman holding hands and walking by the pond they often walked by together. Feeling her time with him was now limited, not that he was ever hers or would be.

"No, I don't want to be any extra trouble. Excuse me." Hurrying out of the room with Kuma at her heels to her room leaving him by himself to wonder what just happened. He knew whatever it was, it wasn't about sushi.

Flopping face first in her bedding, Kuma came over and licked her cheek. She groaned and felt miserable. "I'm starting to think maybe this is more than just a crush." 

Her little fluff ball looked at her with his big brown eyes, he was the best listener even if he couldn't speak. "I can get over these feelings, right? They can't last forever. Kami, what if they last forever?" 

The feeling of dread settling in as she wanted to just go hide in a hole and die a little. "How did this happen? It was only a kiss."

She took her socks off and let her hair down. Brushing it before getting up to go bathe. "I'll be back, sweetie." 

Petting the little dog on the head and leaving for the bathhouse to sort out her feelings without him being right there with his stupid perfect face.

After a long relaxing bath she returned to her room to find a bowl of strawberries sitting on vanity. She smiled, she wasn't sure how to handle her feelings for him especially if he already had someone but also wasn't sure she cared. Just taking things for what they were in the moment and in that one, he was the thoughtful man who brought her favorite food.

....

"Kai, come with me." Putting down her crochet project she stood and walked to Sesshoumaru.

"Kuma, stay. What's up?" She followed him from her room out to the stables. Katsuo was putting Naru up and unharnessing him.

"You're back." Hearing her voice he turned and came over to her, grabbing her by her hips and spinning her around.

"You are a pretty sight to see after a long journey." She laughed as he put her back down.

"What happened?" He had a cut coming down from his ear nearly to his chin following his jaw. It looked somewhat healed but it couldn't have been long after it had happened.

"Nothing someone as sweet as you should worry about." Looking up to meet Sesshoumaru's gaze, she took it as their mutual understanding to speak about it without her. Man things apparently.

"Does it hurt?" Tracing just below the cut with her fingertip.

"No more than a scratch." Then she did something neither would have expected. She leaned closer to him and licked the entire cut with one long swipe of her tongue.

"You just taste like blood and sweat. Pretty sure you made up the whole thing about what I tasted like." He laughed knowing what she tasted like to him and his words could never give her taste justice.

"Did you retrieve the sword?" Feelings of jealously seeping into his being he felt angered. He was daiyoukai Lord Sesshoumaru, jealous of none.

"Here." Pulling a sword out of his pack and handing it to Kai who herself wasn't expecting to have it given to her. Looking down at her hands at the long thin Katana with a forest green sheath that matched its color with the handle.

"I have no idea what to do with this. I was just told I need it and nothing else." She looked up and behind her to Sesshoumaru looking for an answer.

"Sesshoumaru, perhaps I should train her." The silver haired youkai nodded in agreement. 

"Awesome! I get to learn that kind of stuff?" Katsuo smiled, he found her excitement absolutely adorable. 

"Yes but it will be a long time before you get to use this sword. It is very dangerous, especially for a human." It was unknown if a human could even wield the Daku sword. It made him uneasy to think about the potential consequences.

"The sword will stay in your possession. Return to your room, I need to discuss matters with Katsuo." Turning and going next to Sesshoumaru she stood up on her tiptoes and licked under his jaw just below his ear.

"I don't get it." Walking off perplexed as to why they tasted just like regular skin and she different. Figuring they had tasted things more in depth like their sense of smell and hearing.

"I can't say for sure but I think you liked that." Sesshoumaru walked off back towards the castle on his way to the study as Katsuo finally stopped laughing and ran to catch up. 

"I don't have a problem with sharing. It's you Inu that don't like to, which I never really understood anyway." Sesshoumaru fought the urge to strangle him, wanting him to just stop talking altogether.

"She is not yours." He would however make sure to remind him of that as often as needed.

"Only a matter of time. When did you two become familiar?" Reaching the study to show Katsuo where he had marked on the map and discuss tactics.

"She does not understand what she did." He had to wonder though, no it wasn't possible. She had given an Inu apology but doubted she would be as bold to mark him as hers.

"You didn't reject her either." They both sat in front of the table as Katsuo wore a smirk across his face.

"Here is where they will come from beneath the ground." Pointing to the marker on the map laid out before them. 

Katsuo wondered how deep his feelings ran for her. He would gladly share her but knew Sesshoumaru would never which meant him not having her at all. He loved Sesshoumaru as a brother of his own and accepted stepping aside if he ever admitted his feelings towards Kai. Until then, he was going to have a lot of fun with the both of them.

They went over options and strategies as the day wore on into the evening. When Sesshoumaru didn't come for the evening meal, Kai helped Jiro bring it to the study for the men to eat. Jiro of course kept telling her not to help, he was a very stubborn man but equally matched by her.

"Is there anything I can help with?" Coming over to sit next to Sesshoumaru with Katsuo on the other side of the table.

"What kind of creatures are they? We cannot find any information on them at all. Not even a painting. They can sure fly well." His injury had nearly healed already and she was envious of how fast but glad.

"You saw one? I have no idea what they are but I don't know much about this world." He had her full attention and was curious as to why they were above ground but figured it was because they were looking for whatever it was.

"There were two with a shadow youkai. Tricky bastard got my face." It angered him that someone managed to cut him, even more so his face. "He tried to grab the sword. I don't think they could go into the cave but not many can, it's submerged." 

"You can breathe under water? Wow." Youkai were fascinating to her and she always felt like she was learning something new every day. Completely missing the man was after the sword which was now in her possession.

"Yes, water youkai." She laughed at how absurd she must sound to him. 

"Well, I bet water will take out the flying creatures, the seemed like fire. I don't know about Shadow Youkai though." Wondering if there was some sort of light that would kill it, not thinking about if it should be killed or not.

"We will find a way to destroy the enemy." Smiling while looking into his golden eyes, she knew he would protect them all.

"I know. Now, let's get some food into the two of you and get you in bed." Katsuo snickered as Sesshoumaru glared at him, if only looks could kill.

"That's not what I meant and you know it." She still blushed at her fumble realizing how bad that sounded.

"Oh I don't know, after you marking him. Maybe I'm inclined to believe it." Her mouth dropped open with disbelief, what on earth was he talking about?

"I did what? Stop making things up." Turning from a delicate shade of dusted pink to closer a beet red out of embarrassment. Sesshoumaru rather enjoyed seeing her this flustered and began to eat.

"You, my darling, marked him as yours when you licked him." He was laughing so hard he could barely breathe, she was so red.

"I... uh... but I? Hey I licked you too." Where was a hole when you needed one? Maybe if she concentrated enough she would disappear.

"But I am not Inu. Turn any more red and I'm sure you'll burst into flames." She felt it was a very true statement. Wait a second, Inu no Taisho didn't say one single fucking thing about that. Now she had to go whip a spirit's ass.

"I have to go speak with someone." She began to stand as Sesshoumaru grabbed her wrist to make her sit back down again.

"Stay." Really not wanting to look into those gorgeous eyes after finding out about her misstep, she still looked up at him.

"I'm sorry I marked you. Your father had taught me a few things like the nuzzling and such but failed to mention that. That's kind of a big one but I guess he never figured I'd lick you. I was just curious." He released her as she got comfortable again and started to nibble on some fruit.

"Do not apologize." He picked up his bowl of rice and roasted pork and began eating once more.

"It gets even better, Kai. He didn't.." being cut off with a low growl. "Uh, didn't plan on telling you." 

She knew he wasn't telling her something but wanted the entire conversation to be over, to have been buried, burned or thrown off a cliff. Any of those options were acceptable.

"When do I get to do some sword training?" Pretending to hold one as she mimicked a light saber battle. Sesshoumaru become a little more concerned about her safety.

"Come see me in the morning and I'll get you started. Leave the sword in your room, you will not need it." Pouting making Katsuo miss the taste of her lips, so much so he almost took her out with the sword then and there.

"How early?" He chuckled, everyone knew by now how much she hated mornings.

"Whenever you wake up is alright with me." She smiled a big toothy smile filled with anticipation.

"Great, I can't wait. It's going to be so much fun." Both men looked at each other, fun was not usually a word anyone would associate with Katsuo's training, there was a reason he was first in command.

The three talked on through the night until Sesshoumaru decided it was getting too late for her to be up if she planned on training in the morning.

"It is time for little humans to sleep." He stood as did Katsuo looking down at her as he held his hand out for her. Leaving Katsuo to notice he did, having never seen him offer his hand so freely. Taking it, she stood and looked up at him.

"Well good thing I'm not little. I've got to bathe first then maybe I'll sleep." Katsuo took her hands and looked her in the eyes, smiling softly.

"It was lovely to see you, Kai. I missed you." Kissing her cheek and looking smugly at Sesshoumaru. "Until the morning." He released her hands and left the study.

"He really has to keep his lips to himself." Walking out and the opposite way of Katsuo towards where their rooms were. 

"Indeed." He needed to get a handle on these new feelings before he at the very least maimed Katsuo.

"When are you getting mated?" It was the only question she wanted to ask since the other night but hadn't had much of a chance and when she did, feeling too cowardly to ask.

"I am not." Was that why she was upset after he received the letter? Did she have real feelings for him more than what he thought?

"But what you said the other night..." trailing off as her thoughts ran away from her while relief flooded in. He wasn't going to be taken from her, at least not anytime soon. He was handsome, powerful, thoughtful and the list went on. He could have any woman and she felt that wasn't her.

"I choose my own life, not my mother. That woman enjoys annoying me." A small smile grew on her lips knowing he hadn't kept something so big from her.

"Which one?" Rubbing his forehead with two of his claw tipped fingers it was clear.

"Both." Wrapping her arm around his as they continued to walk through the dark castle.

"Well, you got me too. So that's at least three women to annoy you. I kinda feel bad for you." She really shouldn't lop herself in with those two. 

"You are not like them." Arriving at her room she slid open the doors and stared up at him. 

"That almost sounded sweet. Night, Fluffy." Admiring her face glowing by the moonlight of the full moon, he only smiled as she left him.   
....

Sneaking into his room later that night as she laid beside him without saying anything until he finally looked over at her. Having finally asked him about his mating with Miyoko, she felt closer to him, more open.

"I want to adopt one of the children. Are you alright with that?" She had been thinking about it for a while and yes, things were hectic sometimes but there was that one who she really bonded with.

"You do not need my permission." She could do with her life how she pleased. If she felt she was ready to be a mother, than so be it. Better than her having one with someone like Katsuo.

"It's your home I live in." She got under the covers with him and laid her head on his shoulder.

"It is your home as well. Bring the child here." She smiled and closed her eyes as little Kuma came and snuggled against her back. This was the first time she had slept against him when she did this, it was normally on the other side of the bed. He should have told her to leave, to move, something.

"Thank you." Yawning as she slowly fell tumbling into a dream world with her own child within reach.

"Sleep, you have training in the morning." Feeling he was letting things get more out of hand letting her sleep next to him but not caring enough to stop things. He always did what he wanted and right now, he wanted to be close to her. Knowing if he wanted things to go further he had to be certain first.


	18. Black eyes

CHAPTER 18:

Another week passed with her training with Katsuo every morning. She was doing fairly well so far with learning the basics and rituals involved. Though, with Sesshoumaru's instance, she was given a stick like they do with children. Be a little clumsy and suddenly nobody trusted her with a sword.

"Will you send this to Rin, please?" Nobou handed her a letter, he had written her after receiving one from her a few days before. 

"Of course I will." Placing it in the Orb's bag and continuing to walk the forest with him. She needed a good stretch before heading back and thought he would enjoy it too.

"Rin wrote they named the baby Naoji. I think it's a good name." She nodded in agreement, she liked it too. As well as found it adorable they were writing each other.

"Do you want pups?" She laughed as they came to the river and sat down by the bank.

"Maybe one day but that involves a mate first. I'm not in a hurry. Besides...I got you." He wondered what she meant, she couldn't possibly want to be his mother. 

"I don't know what you mean." She guessed he wouldn't, he was a nice boy and he needed someone to be there for him. They had bonded closely over the time she had known him.

"I was thinking, what if you were my son? Would you be alright with that?" He shook his head, she couldn't understand what taking a hanyo as a son would do to her life. 

"It's not a good idea. You'd never find a mate if I was, I can't do that to your life." She grabbed his hand and held tight looking into his eyes.

"My life is my own. I do with it what I choose and anyone who can't accept that isn't someone meant to be in my life. Say yes and let me be your mother, only if you'd like me to be though." His eyes lit up, she was choosing him. Out of everyone there, the younger girls and the full youkai who looked similar to her, it was him she chose.

"I'd like that." Sesshoumaru looked on at the two as what were strangers became mother and son. She had told him earlier in the day she was bringing a child back if they agreed to be hers but wouldn't tell him more than that. He had thought one of the girls but couldn't say he was surprised by her choice knowing how close they had become.

"Good. You'll come with me tonight then or I can come get you tomorrow. You're choice." He decided he would go with her whenever she would like and she chose that night. Refusing any sort of celebration like they had for the twins, she had figured he would have refused from how he was.

"Are you ready to return with your son?" Smiling big crinkling her nose she nodded excitedly. She had a son now, one of her own.

Placing her on Ah-Un as Nobou leapt up and sat behind her. "Now that's just not fair." Laughing at being the only one who couldn't get on the jerks without help.

The first night as new small family was weird for Nobou. He hadn't ever seen luxury like this before and felt out of place. She showed him the bathhouse and his room which was similar to hers but with a more masculine feel. The chests were filled with clothing for him too. He wasn't sure how to feel there but was happy to know no matter what, he belonged with her. For the first time in his life he had a mother.

....

"I'll be by to check on how you are doing after I get back from training. I swear that man is trying to break me." Leaving Nobou with his new sensei and heading to the training grounds. At least she got to admire the bare chested men every morning. 

"What has you in such a good mood?" After the first day, rarely was she eager to start with things.

"I have a son now. You are now looking at a true mother." He had known she wanted to be one and she had talked constantly about the children at the haven. 

"You finally did it. Was it the Soji boy? I bet Sesshoumaru it was him because he resembles you." She did love all of them, but there was only one who had completely stolen her heart.

"Nobou actually." His face looked alarmed more than anything, she wasn't expecting that look from him.

"Do you realize what you have done?" She tightened her jaw and squared herself up for a fight, not caring if he was youkai, she'd punch that face as many times as needed.

"Yes I do. I've been given a son and you're going to be fucking happy for me. Say one bad thing about him and I'll punch that pretty little face of yours." A few of the young men turned their heads to see what was going on hearing her voice turn low. Opting to not to have his authority challenged in front of them he took her aside out of view and hearing.

"You have put your life in danger from youkai and humans, especially humans." She had heard a few stories but didn't care, knowing how she felt and that overruled it all.

"So?" She thought about what Sesshoumaru had said to her. "I'm not going to let fear get in the way of what I want."

"I'm trying to look out for you, Kai. You were almost killed just because you were with a youkai." Thoughts rushing in his mind of her laying lifeless and bloody in his arms. He couldn't bear the thought of her being like that again, never again.

"Just be happy for me, Please." Looking at him with those eyes, he knew he had to accept her choices were her own.

"I am happy for you." Sighing as he grabbed her hand and tugged her along. "Come on, we better get you trained." 

"You going to take that top off? Might motivate me more." Grumbling as she was dragged back to hell, uh the training grounds.

.....

The next two weeks had gone well, Nobou seemed to be adjusting well to his new life with Kai and was looking forward to when Rin returned. Everyone was looking forward to her return but it was still going be a few weeks.

Meeting Sesshoumaru and Nobou for the afternoon meal with Kuma following her into the room.

"How is your day going?" Sitting across from Nobou who was waiting for her.

"Alright." Sesshoumaru arrived taking his seat and began eating the other two began to as well.

"I was thinking after we eat, we could go to the marketplace. Rin asked me to pick up some bath oils and send them. She dropped hers and is almost out." He nodded as he ate his food, he didn't enjoy the marketplace. Hearing what people said about him and his mother made him uncomfortable.

"Rin prefers the wildflower one they offer." Of course he knew what his daughter liked, she enjoyed being reminded how caring of a father he was.

"Would you like to go too?" Knowing he was most likely busy but asked anyway, she would always ask.

"I have matters to attend to." He reached over and stole a piece of orange from her bowl and ate it, she picked up her bowl she eyed him. She had noticed he was being more playful lately.

"I figured you had lordly things to do. Will we see you later or will it be a late night?" Knowing her oranges were in danger and eating them slowly while making eye contact. Not realizing how sensual it looked to him.

"I will see you this evening." They finished eating together, afterwards Kai and Nobou left for the marketplace.

"We came to get some bath oils for Rin. Do you have wildflowers in stock?" The woman nodded and handed her two bottles and Kai gave her some coin in exchange. "Thank you." 

"Are we finished?" He had heard a few things said about him by a few of the marketplace patrons and was ready to leave.

"I'd like to go say hello to Aki. Are you alright?" Looking down at his feet with his hands in his sleeves he nodded. She wrapped her arm around his and they begin to walk towards where she was and was stopped by a large stalky man, he stank of alcohol oozing off his skin in droves to her nose.

"Disgusting half breed with his whore mother. You two do not belong here." Well this was going to be fun.

"What the fuck did you just call my son?" Her tone was overly pleasant as she pierced his angry gaze with her icy stare.

"Let's just go, please." Nobou didn't want to cause her any trouble, he was afraid of this, afraid of her getting hurt. Finally having a mother and overly afraid of losing her.

"Disgusting half breed. Is your hearing damaged whore?" That was it for her, she was livid. Eyes turning all black she looked up at the man standing on her toes to be eye level.

"The only disgusting thing here is your soul. I'll gladly wipe it from this earth." Pulling out a small dagger from the Orb's bag when the man was pulled to the ground, making her swipe downward at the air.

"Leave and do not return. I will not spare your life a second time." Her pure black eyes met golden ones before flicking back down to the man. She jumped toward him with the dagger grasped in her hand as Nobou grabbed her, puslling her to him.

The man rose and left, staring her down the entire time but staying far enough out of her reach. Not out of fear of her but of Lord Sesshoumaru, knowing his left had been spared by a thread.

Standing, seething with anger she stared at the man's back watching him exit the walls. She didn't hear either of them call her name only snapping out of her trance when she was hoisted over Sesshoumaru's shoulder. He took her to where they normally ate and sat her down.

"Kai." She looked up with her blue eyes as he took the dagger from her and threw it across the room, it stuck in the stone floor standing upright.

"Was that normal for her?" Looking over next at her son a little confused why they were acting like she had done something wrong. 

"No." Why were they talking about her if she wasn't there? She was there, right? Pinching her arm to make sure she wasn't dreaming.

"Your eyes were all black. What were you doing?" That was a little alarming to her, can't be a good thing to have happen and he seemed upset by it.

"He insulted my son. Next thing I know, I can sorta see into his soul, made a judgment call and was going to kill him. No big deal." Astonished at what just came out of her mouth. The woman who begged to save the life of a kitten, chose the broken dog, cared for orphans and adopted a hanyo.

"Your intention was to kill him." She nodded and seemed unfazed by the ordeal that just occurred. "Where did you get the dagger?"

"From the training grounds. Katsuo said there may be trouble now I adopted someone who was half human so I took it. Can I get up off the floor now?" Standing she went over to Nobou and hugged him and placed her hands on his face when she pulled back. "I'm sorry you had to deal with that. How about you go to your room so I can talk to Sesshoumaru?" 

"Yes, mother." She kissed his cheek and he left them alone to continue. He wasn't sure what happened but had to admit it felt nice to be defended and terrifying to think of what could have happened.

"Does none of what occurred bother you?" She couldn't help but feel that he thought it should. Should it? Would it have bothered her before?

"No and I can't say it'll be the last time it will happen either nor was it the first. I think it's going to happen more often, so far when I'm really pissed off." He immediately knew when it had happened the first time, the only time it could have happened.

"The monk?" She nodded again. "No more daggers." 

"I'm fairly certain I would have gone after him without one. I almost felt like I couldn't help it." He wasn't sure how to proceed with the situation, she was going to get herself killed.

"You will not be without me." At least then he could keep an eye on her for her own safety.

"Fine." She was going to make him eat those words, that was for sure. Feeling like she didn't need to be baby sat by him or anyone else.

The rest of the day she was his shadow, Constantly not far from him. Nobou was glad to hear she would be with him knowing it was for her safety. Dinner was when she got a brilliant idea to end this whole nonsense quickly. 

"I am going to bathe, you may return to your room." Smiling up at him she shook her head.

"Oh no, I'm with you forever now. Never to be without you, remember? We're doing this together." He laughed, if it was a game she wanted it was a game he was going to win.

"You are the one with issues of nudity." Well crap, she didn't think about that part of the deal. Still, she followed him to the bathhouse committed to regaining her freedom.

As he began to undress and she had to look away, he was entirely too perfect. Trying not to blush and quickly stripping off her clothing and running to jump in before he was finished, not remembering to grab soap.

Taking his time to go and sit in the hot spring watching the realization dawn on her that she needed to get out to grab the soap. He was enjoying himself very much with this new game of hers.

"Can you stop looking at me?" Walking up the steps passing him while trying to cover herself. He noticed the angry red scar on her side, just a reminder of what could go wrong. She rushed to grab the soaps and jumped back in.

"Must you splash so much?" She splashed him on purpose right in his face. "Do it again and I will nip you, little human." 

"You'd have to catch me first!" Splashing him while diving deep and fast, feeling her leg tugged upward. Remembering he was youkai, of course he was faster than her. He grabbed her hair to expose her neck and nipped as she laughed.

"It is not intended to tickle." Nipping her again a bit harder she still laughed. Though he really needed to stop with his fangs on her neck, it felt too nice.

"Well it does. Maybe I'm just meant to be unruly." Giggling at his clear displeasure of the thought, not noticing their close proximity nakedness.

Releasing her as she went to the edge to grab the soap and wash cloth. Catching himself watch her as she began to soap her curvy body, he went over and began to bathe as well.

"Do you really think there is something wrong with me? I don't feel like there is, it feels natural to me." It most likely was natural to her but what he was concerned with was her getting into trouble not the act in itself.

"I am concerned with your safety. You went after a youkai today, he would not have died from one stab wound." Was that all he was concerned about, really? Smiling she was glad that he didn't think of her as demented or sick. Dipping her hair in the water to get the soap off.

"I guess I need to learn to defend myself." Walking up the steps to get a towel, not noticing him watching her every move.

"Indeed you do." He felt she had a lot more to learn and had to wonder how she would react when she did finally take a life. It was only a matter of time before it happened.

"So what do we get to do tomorrow? Today was so boring." Finishing rinsing his massive amount of hair and walking up the steps to join her, definitely not missing her blush before she turned away.

"I give down the judgment of the prisoners." That sounded new to her but she supposed he had to do it. He wondered with the new revelation how things would go when he had to execute someone in front of her, he only handled the most serious of crimes. Up until this point she hadn't seen him kill.

"Let's stop in my room, I need clothes." How far was she going to take this little game of hers?

Walking out and through her room, throwing on some clothes and following him to his. While he changed she got under the covers and Kuma came wobbling in to lay down next to her. Shutting the doors back tight and laying down next to her, he had to wonder why she thought any of this would bother him.

"How early do you get up anyway?" Moving closer to him and wrapping his arm around herself. Noticing she was growing bolder with more physical touch, doubting she understood what that could mean to him. She was too innocent of a heart.

"With the sun." Groaning as she laid her head down on his chest listening to his heartbeat. 

"That's awful." Becoming sleepy from a long enough day she closed her eyes being pulled to sleep by the sound of his heart secretly wishing she could capture it. Instead she appreciated what she could get from him.

....

After much pleading from her to stay in bed, he finally got her dressed, having to help her every step of the way and she was in a rather grumpy mood. He was making her play her own game. 

She sat in the large room meant for court things, Sesshoumaru stood as the prisoners were brought in. Seven in total and each looked just as tired as she felt. Growing even further irritated as the guards went on and on and on about charges and evidence she was done. Had been done and didn't care to have another hour of this crap.

Standing and walking across the room to where Sesshoumaru and the prisoners stood lined up in front of him. "I'm tired, can I please go lay down?"

"No." There he went being all commanding Lord Fluffy again. Irritation turned to anger. She didn't want to be here, she did nothing wrong and shouldn't have to suffer. Her eyes slowly faded to pure black.

She went to the first and saw his very soul, it was black over his heart. Charged with killing his mate, his soul wasn't remorseful. "Guilty"

The second had a light about him, a darker tone but wasn't an evil just mistakes made. Charged with setting fire to a farm which killed a farmer. "Unintentional, angry with his neighbor, sadness, remorse. Free him."

Skipping the third, she didn't even have to look closely. The man was a pure soul. "Innocent" 

Fourth, fifth both black hearts and have killed for personal gain and would again, she deemed them guilty.

The sixth was interesting to her. The heart was good but seemed to have outer evil pressing against it. "Desperation. The people in his life are evil and he needs to be away from them. Then his soul will heal and be pure again."

The last was blackest of black all over, radiating pushing on everyone around him. Everything he touched would be drenched in his vile evil. Making her step back from him. "Can you double kill someone? If so do it to him."

"You fucking human whore! I will kill you where you stand!" It was prisoner seven spouting off a bunch of foul mouthed things at her.

"I will gladly wipe your soul from my presence." Leaping at him with her hands out to grab his neck, she was grabbed by the waist mid air.

"No." Staring up at him with her black eyes, pleading for him to let her, but obeyed him.

"I'm going to enjoy sticking my dick..." there was a thud from his body hitting the ground. Sesshoumaru never took his eyes off of her as he used his energy whip to kill the man, she smiled kindly up at him.

"I will finish here and we can return." He finished off the others quickly and gave orders to have the other three released, one paying a fee for his crime, the other to give his statement of the events that lead to him being there, the last was ordered to restart his life and offered to join the army.

"Can I go to sleep now?" Big blue endearing eyes looking up at him. So tired she barely could stand anymore. He wondered if it was the exposure to certain kinds of souls that caused her to do this. 

Leading her to her own room he left her there as she dressed back into a nightgown and crawled into bed while Kuma snuggled with her. She was tired, grumpy and if she could kill mornings, she would. 

......

"Are you alright with having put to death those men?" Drinking tea by the fire as they did every night he wondered how she was going to handle it.

"Yes, they were bad souls. Best to get rid of them before they inflict more suffering on those who aren't and let's not forget about the three I saved." She seemed fine to him and it was a curiosity, seemingly she had two conflicting hearts melded into one.

"Can you control it?" Really she wanted to lie and say she could mostly so she could go back to having her day be her own.

"Maybe. Do you think of me as broken?" Turning to look into her sweet innocent eyes he wondered how he could ever think of her differently, other than innocent.

"There is nothing wrong with you, besides a clear lack of grace." Laughing as she leaned against him. 

"Not everybody can be like you, Fluffy. So am I free again or do I have to stay with you?" That was the question wasn't it? If she couldn't control herself then she could wind up in serious trouble.

"Until you can control it you must stay with me. We do not know much at this point and you already get into enough trouble without it happening." She whined, Kai couldn't do the whole rising with the sun thing.

"Your schedule is horrid. Rising with the sun, boring crap all day, It's like you're trying to bore me to death." He chuckled, even with things being as serious as they were she managed to just be herself.

"I will come collect you in the afternoon if you stay within the castle until then." She shrugged, it was the best he was going to offer and she knew he was being very kind with that.

"Alright, I guess I can do that." Perfectly fine with her thinking he was giving her some sort of compromise. She was extremely grumpy that early and he didn't care to have to drag her around every morning like that. 

"Nobou is exceeding the expectations of his sensei. Perhaps he will benefit from martial arts as well. He can learn to protect himself and you." She didn't like the idea of him learning to fight, although had to agree it would be beneficial for him to defend himself.

"He doesn't need to protect me but I agree he may need to learn. I want him to feel safe no matter where he is. I love him and I can't lose him." Small amount of fear crept into her scent from the thought of losing him.

"You will not bear anymore loss." The one person in the world who could promise her that and her believe it. 

They talked until it was late and time to sleep. Not sure what the future held for her but knew that with him everything would work out as it should.

.....

It was time to finally retrieve their beloved Rin. No more of the 'soul judgement' as Kai had named it and things had gone back to normal for the most part. 

Nobou had excelled in his martial arts training, not saying one of the main pushers for him was hearing what some of the other trainees were saying about him. He would prove them all wrong, look how strong Inuyasha was and he was just like him.

Katsuo taken Kai on one of missions to help a spirit which was within the west. Sesshoumaru made the spirit nervous and didn't want to say anything with him around. Even to the dead, he was still all powerful and feared.

"I will not speak to a human. Pitiful creatures." The only reason she was out at this farm in the the evening was because of the woman's husband and the woman didn't care to hear a thing. Kai would much rather be packing for the trip.

"She is here at the request of your husband." The woman huffed, as if a human could have any spiritual power. It was pathetic enough monks and mikos claimed it. They've been at it for a little while trying to talk to her and getting nowhere slowly.

"I'm not here for you but for him." Kai grabbed the woman's wrist and stuck her hand in her bag grasping the Orb. The woman brought her clawed hand up and made to strike her as Katsuo grabbed her arm and twisted it behind her back.

"Calm down Momo. I came here to speak to you so I can move on." She looked at her light blue haired husband and couldn't believe what she was seeing.

"Reiji? I miss you my love. It's been too long." Katsuo let go of her arm and released her. The two embraced, they looked so happy and sad to see each other again. Talking for a while It came time for what they were there for.

"I have to tell you something. I'm so sorry but I have to so I can move on." He sighed, he never wanted to tell her and after almost thirty years of being dead he finally accepted it was what he needed to do and grateful to have found the Miko of Souls.

"Whatever it is, tell me." Endearingly touching his cheek that she so desperately wanted to touch again all those years.

"Yui's child is mine." If Kai really thought this day couldn't have gotten worse, she was mistaken Being shoved to the ground in the mud.

"You couldn't have just let me live on with the memory of him? You had to ruin it! Yoi's child is only thirty six! We were mated for over two hundred years! Stupid human!" Swiping at Kai as she rolled to avoid being hit. Katsuo grabbed her out of the mud, throwing her over his shoulder as the woman cursed them both.

"I don't think that could have gone any worse." He laughed as he set her down a long way from the farm. She was caked in mud and just done with the day. They had left after eating, she was tired before they had left and now was exhausted.

"You need a bath." Grabbing her hand as they walked back, "I could use one too. Maybe there's a solution there." 

"Yeah there is." Looking over at her with a bit of surprise in his eyes. "You take one at your home and I at mine."

"I'm sure we would have lots of fun." Smiling as she shook her head, he was never going to give up.

"I'm not interested in your kind of fun and your pouty face needs some work." Leaning over he licked under her jaw just below the ear. "And keep your tongue to yourself." 

"You really should try me out. I hear my skills cannot be compared to another man's fun." Glad she had completely missed what he had actually done and chuckled.

"I'm sure you've had enough practice. I'd be worried if you weren't learning." Laughing as he feigned being hurt by her words. 

Returning her to the castle, he didn't miss Sesshoumaru's face as he collected her. Katsuo just licked his lips and whispered "delicious as always." making Sesshoumaru growl in warning towards him. He was certain he was going to hear about it the next time he saw him but was enjoying himself too much to care.

Waiting until they were alone walking back to their rooms he stopped her, putting his nose to where Katsuo had licked her. "You let him mark you."

"No I didn't." Well he did lick her, she just didn't think anything about it since he seemed to be very liberal with his tongue and her skin.

"He did, I can smell it on you." Whispering in her ear, she pushed him gently away from her. Really he needed to stay away from her neck.

"He's not Inu, remember?" Starting to walk away he grabbed her hand, it was muddied but he didn't mind.

"You will not be his." He wasn't even sure if he was asking her or not just knew he could never let him have her. 

"I don't want to be." Her heart was racing, it almost felt like he was upset by the thought she would be. It made her feel wanted by him, needed in more ways than what had been spoken.

Looking into each other's eyes feeling the pull of the other's lips he stopped himself. "Go bathe. We leave for Rin with the sun." 

Only nodding while feeling slightly rejected by him, she pulled her hand away from his. His fingertips lingered on hers as she walked away. Sesshoumaru couldn't help but feel he made a mistake letting her go.

....

Kai went into Nobou's room after her bath, thankful to no longer have mud in her hair. He sat up hearing her enter.

"I didn't mean to wake you, my son." Never getting tired of calling him that. She felt pride and so much love for him she almost didn't know how to contain it.

"It's alright." She sat down beside him and gave him a hug, she scratched a furry ear for the first time wanting to see if he liked it, he smiled.

"I think Kuma wants to sleep with you tonight." Giggling as the little one in question snuggles further under his covers not caring to be awoken.

"Yeah, maybe. You can take him if you want though. Is he coming tomorrow or is he staying with Jaken?" It was going to be his first trip with them to the village. Anxious to see how Inuyasha lived and the people he had told him about.

"Let him sleep, he likes you. We will take Kuma with us. I know how Jaken despises him anyway." Dumb toad, he got on her nerves constantly but was glad he had been leaving her alone lately. 

"You should go sleep, mama. Lord Sesshoumaru wishes to leave with the sun and I know how much you love that." A smirk came across his face, reminding her of Katsuo when he was particularly proud of his statement.

She kissed his forehead and went to leave, looking back one more time. Watching him lay back down and see Kuma snuggle closer to him. "I love you to the moon and back." 

Turning from shutting the doors, she saw Sesshoumaru standing at his doorway looking down the few doors between them at her. She smiled and walked over to him making eye contact as she went into his room and laid down.

"We both know I'm not going to wake up willingly. Might as well save you some time." He closed the doors and came to lay beside her, wrapping her in his arms. Wanting to be closer to her, she may have said she was ready to move on with her life but he had to wonder chose to wait for anything more.

"You may sleep wherever you wish." Smiling against his chest listening to his heart, so strong and powerful. 

"You shouldn't say that. This might become a habit." Listening to the soft rumble of his chuckle, placing her arm across his chest around his ribs. 

Neither spoke of how they felt, leaving it unsaid was better for now. Each just accepting what was given not asking for more than what was offered.


	19. Rin's return

Making camp while Sesshoumaru took Nobou to hunt, wanting to see his skills and teach him further if needed, it was a good opportunity for it. 

Spring was settling in and it was a nice change for warmer weather instead of the cold, it was the middle of March and getting close to Rin's birthday as well. She wondered what she should do for her, fourteen was a little harder of an age. Kids it was easy, a toy or something colorful and they'd be happy. Of course, Rin would be happy with anything, Kai just wanted it to be perfect.

"He did well." They returned with two rabbits being held by Nobou, with his bloodied claws by the ears.

"Well I hope you intend to teach him how to cook and clean them too. Furry things are not on my list." Going over to kiss her son on the cheek. "You did great."

The three sat beside the fire while Sesshoumaru taught him how to properly skin and portion the rabbit, Nobou doing the same with the other while mimicking his moves. Kuma sat next to them as if he were learning as well and earned a bone. 

As she looked on, that was the moment was when she realized she had fallen in love with Sesshoumaru. She didn't mean for it to happen and after the night before when he held her, it didn't seem so absurd to think he could maybe, one day, feel the same. He took her in his arms on his own, not because she placed herself there. Though maybe he did so because he knew that was what she wanted.

Enjoying the meal caught and cooked by them and trying to overcome the slight sting of being in love with someone who may not feel the same. It was a nice evening altogether, if Rin was there it would have been perfect.

"You're not sleeping?" Kai went over to sit next to Nobou who was still by the fire after she had changed her clothing.

"Not yet. It's peaceful out here." Kai nodded in agreement, it was nice to be out in nature. It seemed to simplify things.

"Don't stay up too late, you know how he likes to leave early." Kissing his cheek and going over to Sesshoumaru, who as usual was sitting against a tree, bending down to kiss his cheek as well.

"Night, Fluffy." Retreating to her bed and lying under the covers, little dog wobbling over to get his own kiss and snuggles. blissfully drifting off to sleep, accepting what her heart was telling her.

Sesshoumaru kept watch and let his thoughts wander of the possibilities of what her kiss could have meant. It could be so many different things, if he was honest with himself he hoped it meant she cared for him.

....

Noaji had grown so much since she last saw him. His eyes were bright and curious, when he was awake, his ears perked up and moved towards any noise. 

"Okay, I'm just gonna wrap him up and take him with me." Kagome laughed fully, babies were cute but a lot of work too. 

"Oh I'm sure." Folding the laundry Rin had helped bring in while Kai held the baby.

"I wish I lived closer, I miss all of you. Then again I'm not sure the brothers could stand to be around each that long." They got a long well now but they were still each headstrong and unwilling to bend.

"That's true. You should have seen them back in the day. I never thought they would be like they are now but life has a funny way of working out." Folding a large white sheet in the middle of the room, Kai admired how quickly she seemed to bounce back after giving birth. Six weeks did not seem like a very long time.

"It seems to." Smiling looking down at one of the little joys given to Kagome. If she hadn't fallen down the well all those years ago, he wouldn't even exist. 

"Nobou is such a nice young man. Is he adjusting alright to everything? I know it has to be a big change for him." She was such a kind and caring soul, it was no wonder she was so blessed in her life.

"He is doing great. Excelling in everything he is taught. I don't think he enjoys the marketplace much or really being around a lot of youkai. He doesn't say anything but I can tell he gets uncomfortable." Stroking the baby's hair as he slept on in her arms, wishing she could have been there for Nobou since he was this small.

"I'm not surprised. Not many are kind to a hanyo. He's fortunate that he looks mostly human though, many aren't so lucky and end up looked neither youkai or human." What did she mean? Did they not all come out the same way?

"I don't understand." Kagome explained all about the ones they had met and especially Jinenji who was a very gentle giant. Mentioning that Inu hanyo seemed to come out consistently as far as she had seen. There was one they had met who looked completely human, they only knew she was one because of her powers. It all fascinated her.

As they talked on through the afternoon the men took the kids out to play. Rin and Nobou getting along as if they had been life long friends.

"You should give Rin some siblings, before you become a grandfather." Inuyasha always saw the slight softness in his eyes when he watched the pups play. Deep down he wished he had seen that softness from him when he needed him growing up, though he would never admit it.

"I need a woman to provide such a task, you did not reproduce on your own." There was the brother he knew, easily providing a slight insult. 

"Looks to me like you have a perfectly good one in your pack." Enjoying seeing his eyes narrow at him, he knew then what he had suspected before. 

"My business is my own, I do not need your suggestions." Inuyasha's laugh bellowed around them, making Sesshoumaru wonder if he should hit him hard enough to knock him out. Would be fairly easy to do. 

"Seems to me you do, if you haven't done anything about it. I can give you some tips on how the whole thing works too." Lavishing in getting any sort of rise out of him.

"Continue to mock me, half breed and this Sesshoumaru will show you his true skills with a sword." Inuyasha scoffed, they hadn't done anything more than the occasional sparring in years. 

Miroku came up with his children following closely behind. "Go and play." The children ran over to the others.

"Fine spring day we are having." Standing over next to Inuyasha watching over the very well protected children.

"Songo kick you out?" Big grin on his face Inuyasha couldn't help but tease him.

"All I said was how beautiful she looked with her belly starting to swell." Shaking his head, he should have known better after three previous pregnancies.

"She's not far enough along for that and you know it. It's like you enjoy the pain." Looking at Miroku's red hand printed face.

"I'm just excited is all. Though, I'm not so sure I'll survive it this time." Laughing, knowing she wouldn't be so cranky after the morning sickness stopped. 

"You'll be alright. You survived last time." The last pregnancy seemed to drag on endlessly, the morning sickness didn't stop and she was miserable the entire time. Miroku hated to see her like that.

"Is that Nobou over there? My how Rin seems smitten with him." As Sesshoumaru stared down at him enjoying the smell of fear creeping into his scent. "I mean they look like they're good friends."

Perhaps he should move Nobou's room further away from his precious Rin when they return. He remembered what it was like to have those types of feelings at that age, no matter how good those two were they should sleep far, far away from each other.

"Nobou, come meet Miroku." Inuyasha hollered over to him and Rin. He came and stood next to Inuyasha in a similar stance.

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Miroku." Indeed it was, the human wasn't afraid or disgusted by him. It was a nice feeling to be comfortable around a human.

"Rin has told us all about you, it is nice to put a face to her stories." He blushed at having Rin talked about him, though he tried to hide it.

He enjoyed Miroku talking, even though he didn't speak much. Feeling like he had made a friend with him that day. The little children seemed to like him too, even the human ones. Inuyasha suggested next time Rin came to visit for him to come too, so he would see what it feels like to live in his village. 

Sesshoumaru left them to continue their conversations and collect Kai. Guessing he'd have to pull the baby out of her arms to get her to leave. They should have already left but he decided to let everyone have more time.

"The sweet part was he stayed with me the whole time after. I'm sure it was some part of pack thing but it meant a lot to me. He even held my hand." Why did she sound sentimental about it all, did it mean that much to her he had stayed? Assuming she was going over what had happened to her. Standing outside the door about to go inside.

"How long have you had feelings for him?" Knowing he shouldn't listen, should just walk away but the answer was right there if she had feelings for him or not after all. 

"Is it that obvious?" Kagome giggled as Kai sighed. She had real feelings for him more than just a natural attraction.

"I can see it in your eyes when you talk about him." The baby began to coo and he heard the women move, most likely to give the baby to Kagome.

"I don't think anything will come of it though, as much as I'd like it to. He should be with a beautiful youkai woman who is full of grace and manners. Someone special. That's just not who I am, I'm not what he deserves." She sounded so defeated, had he not shown her what she's worth to him? 

"I think you'd be perfect for him. He needs to lighten up a bit, he's always so serious all the time." The two women chuckled at knowing how he was. 

"I have to be realistic, Kagome. I'll be with him in any way I can but I have to remember he will one day belong to someone else. Not that he belongs to me now." He couldn't listen to any of it anymore, it angered him that she valued herself so little. Always seeming so confident and self assured it was jarring to hear her speak the way she was.

Walking into the home and making eye contact with her. She felt her stomach drop, knowing he could very well have heard everything.

"We will be leaving, are you ready?" Nodding she went over, kissed the baby and gave Kagome a hug.

"One of these days you're going have to stay for a real visit." Smiling knowing it wouldn't happen for a long while. 

"I'd like that." The two left and went down to where everyone else was, still running and playing. She wanted him to say something, anything as long as it wasn't about what he could have overheard, instead they each remained silent the way there.

As the group said their goodbyes to everyone, they walked back to Ah-Un and got Rin's pack strapped on. Placing Rin up first as he always did. 

"Kai will be with me." Nobou nodded and jumped on behind Rin. Great now she had to fly cuddled up with him without him saying anything. 

Instead of grabbing her and taking off like he usually did, he transformed into his natural form. Dread replacing Itself with excitement. "Come." 

Doing as told she climbed on using his fur with a big goofy grin. Once she was settled he took off into the skies with Ah-Un following closely behind. It was definitely the highlight of the entire trip for her, snuggling behind his head and reaching up to scratch a giant ear. 

.......

"That was so amazing! I love the feel of your fluffy on my face and I was so much warmer too. Thank you so, so much." Jumping up to kiss the human formed Sesshoumaru on the cheek. Every time she kissed him it made his blood stop for a beat and it was a feeling he began to enjoy and no longer resent.

Bending down to whisper in her ear, noticing her shiver at how close he was to her. "I am not fluffy."

Laughing as he pulled away from her seeing Ah-Un brining their pups to land beside them. Helping to unload the dragon and set up camp, it felt nice to have Rin with them again. 

They all sat and listened as Rin told about her visit. It was a meal full of laughter and happiness to be rejoined again, Rin felt like she was home even if they weren't there yet.

Kai braided Rin's hair which had grown longer since she was a child, down the the middle of her back. She didn't care for it to be too long and always ended up cutting it to about that length. He never could convince her to grow it longer.

"Goodnight, Rin. I'm so happy to have you back." She kissed her cheek and smoothed her hair, standing and going over to Nobou who was sitting against a tree by the fire.

"I figure I'll keep watch with Sesshoumaru." She smiled and nodded, kissing his cheek as well. 

Looking over to see him watching her as she got ready for bed herself, she still wondered if he knew, If he had heard her. Thankful she didn't embarrass herself too much if he had. 

Coming to stand beside him as he stared up towards the bright moon. He took her hand in his before looking down to see her smile, feeling her fingertips wrap around his hand. Standing silently together holding hands, she wasn't sure what any of it meant but would take it all.

....

Watching over the camp while the girls slept, Nobou and Sesshoumaru sat next to each other. The boy was naturally quiet, he appreciated that about him.

"You made her very happy today. Thank you for that." He knew how Inu were and guessed Sesshoumaru even more so about being ridden. Whatever his reasons were, he was grateful to see her smile like she did.

"We are pack." Feeling it was the only explanation needed if that was what he was after.

"Am I?" Of course he was, being the child of someone already pack made him one as well. Wondering if he understood pack dynamics, realizing he most likely didn't being his own didn't take him in after his father passed.

"Of course, do not be stupid." Nobou smiled to himself, he was accepted by the Alpha. 

"I am curious, if I may ask, how did you become the ruler of the western lands so quickly?" It was true, he had not always had everything he had. Somewhat missing the days when he could freely roam without so much responsibility.

"Defeating Naraku gave my reputation even further creditably. I took what I wanted. There was no resistance after the previous leader having been killed by Naraku, the lands needed someone to protect them." He had heard stories growing up of the great Inu Sesshoumaru, even before he was in true power he had been seen as a leader.

"The lands seem larger than I remember as a boy." Sesshoumaru resisted snorting, he was still a boy.

"They have doubled in size. Many are eager to join my lands." The only resistance so far was the north and south but it was only a matter of time.

"Is that what you want, to have everyone under your leadership? I think that would be good thing." Liking that Sesshoumaru was engaging in the conversation guessing it was because of the topic.

"I wish to defeat the most powerful beings. I have already and not met anyone worth battling since." Not missing the boy's impressed gaze while it dawned on him he belonged to the most powerful being there was. Though he missed the challenge.

"Do you think there will ever be anyone else for you to battle?" He was in awe of the powerful being next to him. Not only was he powerful but intelligent as well and ambitious.

"Perhaps." Only time would tell if there would be someone worth defeating. Until then he would continue to stretch his new reign and take over things, it was something to do to pass the time.

Kai stirred, turning over to face him while still sleeping. Her face glowed by the dying firelight, seeming as a mythical creature so beautiful and unaware. The night passed more quickly with another person staying up to keep watch, occasionally they spoke of things but mostly was silent. Listening to the world around them as it slept on.

.....

Finally arriving back late the next evening, Kai opted for a bath after the others got theirs. Traveling was always tiresome, meaning to just lay down for a little bit before sneaking off to see if she could get a repeat of being held. Almost feeling addicted to his touch. Instead she fell asleep with Kuma lying his head on her shoulder, lightly snoring.

"Kaiya." Wishing to be able to break stupid thing in a thousand pieces, she reluctantly picked it up in the middle of the night. It was never good when this happened and it was even worse feeling like she couldn't help herself.

Back in the terribly hot place she had been before, looking up and around. It looked different to her, darker.

"It was taken by a water youkai. I apologize for my failure." The shadow kneeled down in front of the gray man.

"Then retrieve it." Spat out with more hatred than she had ever heard before.

"Yes, sire. I believe the one who took it went to the western lands, I will not fail you again." He stood and turned to walk away before stopping. "Someone is watching us, I can feel them." 

Her heart was pounding as she held her breath while trying to free herself from the Orb's grip. 

"It matters not. The Daku sword will be mine regardless." He grabbed a small lizard off the wall as it crawled up it and ate it whole. As if she needed a another reason to see he was a monster. 

"I will find you." The shadow man whispered while looking around. Finally her hands released the glowing Orb and she rolled onto her side. The pain was as bad as it had been previously but this time was accompanied with panic, he knew she was watching. 

"Mama?" Nobou came in after hearing the dog whimpering and saw her laying curled up in a ball shaking with Kuma trying to comfort her. Going over to to place her head in his lap and smooth her hair.

"Sesshoumaru!" He was there in an instant coming to Nobou's frantic call. 

"Go retrieve a warm pot of tea." Admiring how calm he was, Nobou left her to do as commanded.

Picking her up in his arms and holding her as she struggled to breath. 

Returning, he awaited further instructions. "The small box on the left, place a pinch of herbs in and pour tea over it." 

Doing as told he handed Sesshoumaru the cup. Lifting it to her lips and she drank the midnight tea, he held her as she stared into his eyes until she stopped trembling "he knew I was there." And fell into a deep sleep. 

"Will she be alright?" The boy worried about his mother, she looked like she was in so much pain and there wasn't much he could do. Sesshoumaru nodded once while staring down at her in his arms. "Will you stay with her?"

"Yes, there is nothing more that can be done. Sleep." Nobou stood after touching her face and left the room, leaving Sesshoumaru to his own thoughts. He despised how much pain it put her in.

She awoke a few hours later and told him about what had happened. It was clear she was afraid of being seen while there. He laid down on her bedding and held her through the rest of the night, not liking the feeling of being helpless to stop her fear. He would kill them all.


	20. I feel my heart melting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neat little fact, Mama is Japanese for mom. Thought that was interesting enough to share.

CHAPTER 20: I feel my heart melting

"So I get a real sword today. Alright, lets do this." Katsuo laughed, after all this time training she was too excited. Two weeks had passed since they returned home and things fell easily back into routine.

"Yes but remember this isn't wooden and can hurt you." She twitched an eyebrow at him with an annoyed look. Even then he would still kiss those lips, though trying to remove those thoughts from his head.

"Yeah, yeah. Gimme." He handed the sword over and somewhat held his breath as she began to go through the motions.

It went extremely well and he was impressed with his own teaching skills. As well as relieved she managed not to hurt herself. Time had stood still as he watched her smoothly go through the motions.

"See I did great!" Throwing her hands up, including the one with the sword and it slipped out of her hand. Of all things just let it drop, she tried to catch it and sliced open her left palm. "Don't say a fucking word." 

It was bad enough she could hear the laughter ringing from the group of men sparring behind her. So close, so fucking close. He ripped off a piece of his clothing and wrapped her hand as the blood began to pour down her wrist and forearm.

"You don't knock it off, you'll regret it." Loud, stern and domineering to the laughing men. She had to admit, he had power of those jackasses. "Come on, let's get you to Botan." 

She began to walk and was a little startled when he swept her off her feet. "I am able to walk. It's my hand not my leg." 

"Can't be too careful. Who knows, you might trip on the steps and bust your lip or something." She pinched his pointed ear, to no satisfaction when he laughed.

"Fine then, take me away oh noble Prince Ass." He just laughed even harder, as she feigned being a fainted princess in his arms.

Having felt a little guilty, she had been hurt in his care for a second time but knew it wasn't life or limb threatening. It was a hazard of the training and she needed to do it with a real sword, even looked graceful up until that point. He supposed she may have used up her daily quota of grace doing the stances. Perhaps a weeks worth.

Botan had seen them coming as he was returning from the field of herbs and greeted them at his door. "Now, what do we have here?"

"The first thing I cut with a sword was my own hand." At least she seemed in good spirits about it.

"Come in and let me have a look." He stopped to look at Katsuo "and why are you carrying her? It's her hand, not her leg." 

Kai laughed so hard she snorted. "That's what I said." In between bouts of laughter and snorts.

"This poor delicate flower is injured, I felt it was the right decision." Both staring at him completely not convinced. "She smells nice."

"That's more believable. Now put her down so I can see what we have." He sat her on the futon and took a spot next to her.

"I think she'll need stitches, it looked deep when I wrapped it." Stopping himself from unwrapping it, Botan got what he needed to stitch it and some things to clean and bandage it as well.

"How did I do otherwise?" Placing his arm around her waist, she knew by now he was just a touchy person and have long since not thought anything more of it.

"Very well, graceful." She rolled her eyes, her entire life not once had anyone called her that.

"Seriously." Botan came over and unwrapped the still bleeding hand, it would certainly need stitches. That's what she got for trying to catch a sword by the blade though.

"I am being serious." Seeing in his eyes he wasn't just humoring her or even mocking her, she smiled until the first stitch went in.

"That hurts worse than cutting it open did." Still, she kept her hand where it was and fought to pull it out of his grip.

"I know but it won't heal without a few stitches." She dug her fingernails into her leg through her hamaka, she could get through this.

"Take my hand, you'll hurt yourself that way." Katsuo pried her hand off her own leg and held it as she squeezed. 

"One more and I think it'll be done." Quickly finishing she was relived to have it over. It was going to be something she remembered every time she handled a sword from then on.

"What happened?" Looking up to see Sesshoumaru coming through the door. Of course he would smell her blood and come find her. 

"Oh nothing. Just a little clumsy is all." Wishing her hand with stitches wasn't being displayed while Botan was cutting the threads shorter.

"Kai." Kami, why did it feel like she was in trouble when he said her name like that?

"I did well up until I finished and dropped the sword... and tried to catch it before it fell." Looking down at her hand, she couldn't bear to look at him anymore, she felt foolish.

"Next time, let it drop." Her head shot back up at him, she was expecting to have to fight to keep training. Smiling as he came and knelt beside Botan to look at her wound. 

"Katsuo said I even looked graceful, well up until this happened." Feeling his thumb rub across the back of her hand as he inspected the stitches, making butterflies stir inside her.

"Graceful. I would like to see, after you have healed." Releasing her hand for Botan to treat and bandage.

"I'll have you healed up in no time." Not coming from who she would have thought, but Katsuo who was suddenly too close. 

"Uh, thanks." Really feeling awkward in the moment and eternally grateful she was bandaged and could escape his grasp.

"I will take her." Going over to where Sesshoumaru now stood, she couldn't help but feel like she was completely missing something as the two men stared without saying anything more.

"Here. Take this now and it'll help with the pain and I'll give some to Jiro for later." A small cup of the blue dragon. It didn't hurt much right now but she knew it was going to later when the adrenaline wore off.

"Thank you, Botan. Oh, and tell the boys I love them. Will i still see you all tomorrow for midday meal?" She really wanted to say lunch, she felt like she was living in the feudal era, wait she was. 

"I will and of course we will see you. Wouldn't miss it for anything." Touching her arm as she smiled.

They began to walk out of the room and was stopped by Katsuo. He grabbed her good hand in his own. "take care of yourself. I'll come see you in the morning, even though we won't be training."

"Sounds nice. Was I really graceful?" He smiled at her, she was such a sweet woman and he enjoyed seeing that look in Sesshoumaru's eyes as he grabbed her hand.

"Yes, Until tomorrow my sweet." Kissing her hand before he let go making sure to stare at the other man's eyes as he did. Very much enjoying making him angry at him, maybe then he would declare his feelings. Either way, he was having great fun.

"Keep you lips to yourself, Prince Ass." Earning a small chuckle from Sesshoumaru, which gave him the chills hearing it. 

Walking her down to her room she expected him to go about his boring day without her, making her stay in bed all day. "Go bathe."

"Do I stink that badly?" Going over to pull out some extra clothing so she wouldn't have to afterwards.

"No, I know you want to." Interesting, he simply wanted her to do something she enjoyed. She started laughing nearly hysterical as she held her hand up.

"I just realized I have one stitch for each finger I have on my hand." She had the feeling of being mischievous even more so now, everything seemed dreamlike and fun.

"It seems you do." Such a strange woman anyway now she was even stranger. The way his voice subtly seeped into her mind felt amazing in more than one way.

"Will you untie me? My hand hurts an awful lot." It didn't hurt too much at all, the blue dragon had taken care of that. She just wanted his hands on her, all over her.

Why did he get the feeling she was going to extra trouble this morning? He began to untie the many small ties after the larger one. She stepped out of her hamaka, slipping off her socks as well. He finished untying the last one on her top which had been double knotted, he guessed so Katsuo didn't catch a glimpse, ever, of what was hidden beneath.

The scent of her mild arousal was overpowering every other sense he had. As she began to slip her top off her shoulders, he grabbed it and pulled it shut tightly. "Go bathe."

"You could come with me." Determined to get what she wanted and that was him at the moment. He was equally determined to burn the entire field of blue dragon herbs. 

"I will come collect you after you bathe." Those pouty pink lips were dangerous. 

"Fine. I'll go have fun on my own then." Grabbing the damned Orb off the floor and walking out to the bathhouse leaving her top open barely covering her breasts, with the necklace he gave her snugly draped between them.

He left her room, needing to be extremely far away from that... scent. As well as whatever 'fun' she was having alone in there. 

Returning to find her reading in her room an hour or so later, thankful she was fully dressed and ready to go. "What are you reading"

"A breeze from the stream.  
A copse of willows,  
And I see Spring's gleam. 

A man named Socho wrote it. Seems fitting with spring coming in. I found this little book of poems he was selling a few weeks ago and haven't had the chance to read it." He knew she had been struggling with the 'older' kanji than she was used to reading so he was glad she was trying to improve it.

"I feel my heart melting   
in the mildness like candles:   
my veins are slow oil   
and not wine,   
and I feel my life fleeing   
hushed and gentle like the gazelle." It sounded beautiful in his voice, seemed like a poem about death to her but wondered why he had chosen it.

"I didn't know you knew that kind of stuff." Getting to her feet to come over to him by the doors after putting her book away.

"My mother insisted on it." Not telling her reciting poetry was how courting was done here for the higher born. Until this morning she seemed to be more timid about her feelings towards him and unspoken, he didn't want to distress her. 

"It's a nice thing to know I suppose. Is it time for food? I'm so hungry, I skipped this morning and just drank tea instead. Do you think if I drank enough tea, I'd turn into a tea leaf after I die?" Grabbing his hand and walking out towards where she knew food would be or at least soon.

"Our bodies nourish the land after we are gone. It is possible to choose to be a tea leaf." He would humor her musings hoping she wouldn't repeat her earlier aggressions.

"If I get to choose then I want to be a large tree. There are these trees called rainbow trees, their bark is every sort of color you could imagine. I'd be a rainbow tree." The seriousness in her tone was what amused him so much, he chuckled. If she wanted to be one, then she would find a way. Finding her knowledge of things he didn't know extremely sensual.

"No more talk of death, little human." She would never die if he had something to do about it. Arriving to see Rin and Nobou already seated next to each other.

"Mama, you're hurt." He cloud smell the blood on her hand and immediately saw the bandage that wrapped it, not missing her other hand being held by Sesshoumaru.

"Oh it's just five little stitches, I'm just fine. Which reminds me, no swords for either of you. Apparently they're dangerous, go figure." Each taking their spot as Kuma came wobbling in to take his, most likely from playing with Kata like he did anytime she was away. Though he did sometimes disappear where nobody knew where he went.

"She has had Blue Dragon and may be a bit, odd." Rin giggled knowing how she was when she drank it, she always said the most odd things.

"I'll show you a Blue Dragon." They began to eat and she chose to grab an entire bowl of fruit, not caring to share.

"Would you like me to stay with you for the rest of the day?" Rin was hoping she would say yes, she didn't care to go back to studying today. It was too nice and knew she could convince her to go to the gardens.

"No, sweetie. Your studies are very important, I'll be alright for a while by myself. Besides, I'm kind of tired. Perhaps I'll take a nap." Hoping she would nap, it would be for the best. 

"If you change your mind, come find me." She nodded, knowing exactly what Rin was trying to get out of.

"You may go to the gardens afterward." She had always loved that her father knew her so well but today not so much.

"Yes, father. Nobou, will you join me?" If she asked him to swim across the ocean for a piece of fish, he would but she had no idea.

"Of course." Kai knew exactly what was potentially starting there and giggled at what could possibly be the biggest headache for her love, uh Sesshoumaru. 

After finishing eating she was taken back to her room, she supposed to make sure she actually went there. Which she couldn't really blame him, she already tried to go see what Katsuo was doing, then Botan and after tried Aki but he wasn't having any of it. "Stay with me for a little while?" 

Going in with her he sat on the floor next to her futon. She plopped down on the bedding and put her feet under the blanket after removing socks.

"Thanks for not being mad at Katsuo today." she laid down facing him on her side, while placing her injured hand on the pillow.

"Injury often occurs during training." It was understandable and he couldn't place blame on him for doing what he was supposed to. Glad it wasn't as bad of an injury as it could have been, humans are so fragile.

"So I guess you were just waiting for it to happen with me. One day maybe I'll be graceful." Closing her eyes to take a well deserved nap, wondering why she wanted to go see anyone when she was so tired.

"You do not need to be." Kissing her forehead before he left, she smiled having her first kiss from him. Not stopping herself from falling deeper in love with him and unsure if she wanted to stop herself.

....  
After they each finished with their days, the pups met in the garden. She looked so pretty to him, as if she stepped out of a painting into real life. 

"The flowers are all starting to bloom, even the cherry blossom trees." Walking around the dozens of types of flowers and plants enjoying the warm and dry weather.

"Can I ask you something, Rin?" His tone seemed more serious than usual but still soft spoken.

"Anything, Nobou." Her brown eyes met his deep violet ones that looked more nervous than anything.

"I know we are pack, but what am I to you? Am I brother or something else?" Already knowing he had feelings for her, he hoped it wasn't the answer he dreaded. 

"My closest friend." Unwilling to give away that he made her rethink a relationship with Kohaku, that his violet eyes made her melt inside. She could never think of him as a brother.

"You're mine too." Smiling at not being a sibling to her and having a door left open for when they were older.

"That makes me happy." She linked her arm around his as they walked further into the garden.

"Tomorrow is your birthday. Is there anything I can do to make it more special?" Trying to cover his blush at her touch.

"Will you spend the whole day with me?" He laughed softly at her request.

"Of course I will." They walked together and occasionally Rin picked flowers to bring inside later. The two friends felt closer after talking and each enjoyed that the most.

....

Opening her eyes to see it was already evening time, she guessed it could have been after the meal. With her morning transgressions slapping her in the face to mortify her enough to stay in bed forever.

Sitting up using both hands and immediately regretting it, things seemed pretty bleak. Kuma licked her face and she smiled, maybe not so much. Giggling as the little dog's tongue tickled her cheek. 

"Alright, alright. I'm awake." Getting up to go see if there was food or not, the very least something to drink. 

She walked into the dining area and found Sesshoumaru sitting alone drinking tea. What she really wanted to do was go back and hide in shame. Taking a deep breath and sitting next to him, she nuzzled under his jaw.

"You do not need to apologize." When she still didn't look at him he touched her face to make her. "This Sesshoumaru is very alluring, it is understandable." 

Rewarded with chuckle and smile from him, she felt relieved he wasn't put off by her. She laughed as well, sure he would tease her for years to come. "It's pronounced arrogant." 

"You are hungry." She nodded as he pulled a covered bowl over and handed it to her, rice and roasted pork, it smelled heavenly. He made sure she had meat and not just fruit like earlier.

"Did the kids enjoy the garden today?" Taking a huge bite and trying to swallow before speaking again.

"Pups. Yes, I believe they did." Giggling, she knew by now he preferred that term and she always said just about anything otherwise. Once even used hatchlings, that seemed to irritate him the most.

"That makes me happy, I feel like they're cooped up in here with the rain lately." Knowing if she was going stir crazy over it, those two felt it far worse. 

"You are happy." Eventually she got used to his statements as questions and stopped fighting him on them for the most part.

"Very much so. You have given me everything I could ever want, a family. After Takeo passed I wasn't sure I'd ever get to feel this way again, happy I mean." Thankful she caught herself before slipping up, she knew he was an intelligent man and could easily figure it out if she didn't fix it. Maybe if she just kept stuffing her face she wouldn't have to worry about talking.

"We will always be pack." Captured by her genuine smile, wanting nothing more than to kiss her. He poured some tea, handing it to her.

"What is it?" Taking the cup and drinking it while immediately regretting the action, fucking midnight tea. "Never mind, I know."

"I felt it best instead of the original option." Enjoying seeing her cheeks pinking with a blush across them.

"Yeah, okay." Scarfing down her food even faster knowing she didn't have much time before she would be in her coma. Damn that concoction knocked her out hard.

"Will you be sleeping with me tonight?" Mildly choking on her food she barely managed to squeak anything out.

"What?" He was unsure what her reaction to his question was about. Perhaps she misheard him.

"Will you be sleeping with me tonight?" Finally dawning on her what he actually meant, nodding her head. 

Either way it most likely would have given her some sort of similar reaction, they never spoke about it. He never stopped her, she never asked but would come into his room after the kids were asleep ever since they retrieved Rin.

He waited for her to finish her meal, watching as her eyes seemed to close longer each time she blinked her thick lashes. Ushering her to his own room, she sat on his bedding while he retrieved her a nightgown. 

Kneeling down beside her to help her with the ties before going over to change himself as he faced the chest from which he pulled his clothing. It began to gently rain again, softly singing her further into her sleepy state.

Laying down beside her holding her tightly in his arms realizing this was the part he looked forward to every night. Feeling her skin against his as she rested her head on his chest, her warmth wrapping around him as she pulled her arm tighter around his ribs. Feeling her bare leg move up and slip between his calves, he needed her each night.

"Fallen rain dripping  
From the leaning eaves  
So shallow that  
Swiftly in pours  
The moonlight." She stirred muttering half asleep as he combed her hair with his claws.

"Everything sounds so beautiful coming from your voice." Finally falling into the dream world where she didn't have to hide her love for him, where he would love her as well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Turns out poetry is howthey wooed each other back in the day, especially high born. Often they were unseen to each other hidden behind screens and recited poetry to each other. The better the poetry, the most attractive the person was. If a woman started first, it was seen as sexually aggressive.


	21. Rin's birthday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuma is based on my real life dog. Adopted her last May, she's a six year old all white chihuahua with a janked up left leg. Named her Lord Sesshoumaru but call her SessyRu. It was shortly after adoption I figured why not try to write a story.

Sunlight slowly rolling into his room he took a deep breath, herscent filling his lungs. She moved in her sleep, tucking her face under his ear. He could feel her lips on his neck as her other hand slid into his hair before she stilled again.

Appreciating the feeling she gave him just from a simple touch she didn't even know she gave. Deciding then, he would make her his formally but also making sure he would take his time so she would know her worth to him.

Brought out of his thoughts hearing foot steps walking down the hall, stopping at her room and returning to his. Looking towards the door with a smirk in place as Katsuo slid them open.

"Now what do we have here? Knock it off with that look of yours, I smell nothing happened. Though I have to wonder as to why not." If he thought this would make him jealous he was mistaken. Had to admit he was a little sore at seeing his game come to an end, then again she wasn't officially his.

"Too early jackass." Not bothering to open her eyes as she pulled on what she thought was the covers, finding it wouldn't budge and giving up.

"Ah, well I suppose I can just wait for my turn if I'm too early." Chuckling seeing things still hadn't fully come into focus for her yet.

"You can kill him now, Fluffy." Eyes flying open as she sat up realizing what was happening. Which was rather difficult in her half sleep state and being essentially tangled with Sesshoumaru.

"What do you need, Katsuo? You have had enough fun with her." Sitting up as well and slipping his arm around her waist, if she hadn't been so horridly embarrassed she would have noticed the gesture.

"My mother asked me to go fetch some things for her in a village a little ways away and I came to help her hand heal before I left. Besides, she's so much more fun in the early morning." Not even looking at him as her face was buried in knees, she held her palm out.

Unwrapping it and giving a very elaborate licking before wrapping it with a fresh one. "You taste just as delicious as you did last time. It's a pleasure as always to taste your skin."

Peeking out to see his big jackass of a grin staring at her. Wanting to slap it right off his face but she was grateful he came to care for her, it would heal much faster. "Thank you." 

He rose to his feet again and started towards the open doors. "Sesshoumaru it was nice to finally see you with a woman. I have to admit I was beginning to wonder if i ever would." 

Swiftly leaving and shutting the doors as he heard the low growl behind him, laughing gleefully the entire time.

Kai started to get up and he held tighter to her waist not allowing her to leave. "Stay."

"I've done enough damage to your reputation, you don't need people getting ideas. Let me leave before someone else finds us." He laid back again and pulled her with him.

"I do as I please." She smiled looking up at him biting her bottom lip, almost losing his control and taking all of her then and there.

Shifting to get comfortable against him again, wanting to ask so many different things. "I'm still not sure I should stay."

"Does it shame you to have been seen in bed with me?" For all that was sacred could he just stop making it sound even worse, or at least stop talking about it?

"Of course not. It's... not proper and I know how you value those sort of things." Not saying she was taken aback by being caught in this position with someone she didn't know if he had the same feelings or not. 

"Do you wish to stop?" She didn't want to answer, it felt like she was giving too much away about how she felt. Choosing not to answer him at all.

"Do you?" She quietly asked waiting for his answer. 

Sliding his hand up her sleeve to feel the skin of her arm, of course he didn't want to stop, he wanted more. "No." 

It made sense to him why she would think that way about what was happening. His entire life he had lived with honor and upheld it the best he could. He should have said yes, let her go, do things the proper way but couldn't bring himself lie or let her leave his arms.

Tilting her head up to kiss cheek feeling as if he admitted it wasn't so one sided as she thought. Things had shifted between them and each could feel it. 

....

"Alright so I think everything is ready." Looking over to make sure there were plenty of Flowers and all of Rin's favorite foods. One she made herself that she knew would be her new favorite.

"I have not seen a cake such as this." Raising her eyes from the table to his, her heart beat faster.

"That's because it's a kind from my era. Made with flour, eggs, sugar, some blueberries and I made sort of a frosting. I couldn't recreate that one so well but it tastes good." She kept her voice low so the others couldn't hear, she hadn't told anyone else about where she really came from. 

Nodding once as he heard Nobou bringing his sweet daughter. The twins with Botan had already arrived, as well as Sunao with the other children at the haven and were waiting for them to come. The doors slid open and her face lit up. Rin had told Kai she didn't want anyone fussing over her, so she was surprised and glad she didn't listen.

"Oh wow, you're all here!" Going to hug Kai knowing it was all her who put it together before hugging her father.

They had a wonderful celebration of her life being one year older, lots of food and her new favorite, cake. Opening gifts from the children before they left to go back to the haven and the twins home. She felt very loved by them all.

Kai gave her a large gift in a plain wooden box that seemed oddly shaped, not very deep and laid out somewhat large. Untying the ribbon she peeked inside to see a well made blanket perfectly sized for large futon. Well done with a scene of spring time, looking over a field of wild flowers. Rin knew how much work it must have been and nearly started crying she was so happy.

"Thank you, Kai." She smiled back at her, glad she was happy.

Sesshoumaru handed her a small box that fit in the palm of her hand, Kai later found out they were a variety of rare seeds. It seemed like something sweet and special between the two.

Nobou chose to give what he made her in private, Kai wasn't too shocked. He was so shy about things. The had a great afternoon spending the day as a family would.

....

Nobou and Rin stayed as the adults left, she could tell he seemed nervous. Handing her a rectangle wrapped object and looking down at the floor.

Opening it she saw it was a painting, snowy landscape nestled in the mountains with a single brightly colored flower reaching towards the sun. 

"It's beautiful. Who painted it, i think I found a favorite artist." Not knowing he had done it himself, to him it was what his life was like with her. Before it was cold and colorless, she brought new meaning to his life.

"I did." Putting it down before she leapt at him and hugged him tightly. 

"Thank you." If that was he reaction she had for a painting, he would need to get to work and make many more.

Releasing him and settling back to look over it again, she could never put into words how it made her feel. The doors slid open and Kohaku came in to see the two sitting next to each other. 

"Rin, It's so nice to see you." She jumped up and ran over to him and hugged him, making Nobou feel his stomach drop. It had to be him, the one she told him about.

"I had no idea you were coming. It's a nice surprise." Stepping back she looked over to her friend, "this is Nobou, Nobou this is Kohaku."

Each nodded to each other before Kohaku spoke. "If I am interrupting I can come later this evening."

"No, you've come a long way. I'll give you two some time to catch up." Going to the garden leaving them alone in the dining room.

Seeing Sesshoumaru and his mother standing by the pond. "You left them unattended."

"Should I not have?" It was clear he had expected to be alone in the garden.

"He is a grown man with my young daughter." Leaving to go supervise the visit making sure Kohaku did not overstep with her.

"I'm sorry, Mama. I didn't think about it that way." Snatching a leaf off the nearby tree and beginning to shred it slowly.

"It's just proper things I suppose, you know how he is about her. What's wrong?" It was very clear to her something was eating at his soul.

"Why did he have to come? He saw her at Inuyasha's, he didn't need to come here." She sat on the grass and patted next to her and he followed.

"Because he cares for her. I'm not sure if it's more towards love or a friendship but you shouldn't dwell on it. Your relationship with her, whatever it is, doesn't depend on what he does but what you do." Watching as he ran his claws through the grass and dirt marking the land.

"It doesn't make me feel any better about her hugging him though." The boy was smitten with her and she could see how conflicted he was about her being in the same room as another.

"Oh honey, you're going to have the feelings. I know part of it is because you are part Inu and they tend to be possessive of what they feel is theirs. Maybe talk to Sesshoumaru to see how he deals with unwanted feelings, it might help and he is also a man. Til then, how about you go down to the training grounds and exercise some of the feelings there?" He looked up to see her caring eyes and was thankful for them.

"Do you think that'll help? I feel angry as well as sad. I'm not even sure why." Grabbing his dirty hand and holding in hers she sighed.

"Of course I do. Anytime Takeo would get angry about something, especially something he couldn't do anything about, he would exercise and train. He always came back in a much better mood, saying it helped him sort things out in his head better." They sat for a while as she rubbed his back trying to sooth the young man, she knew how Rin felt about him but couldn't betray her trust to comfort him. Things needed to develop on their own and not too quickly.

"Thanks, Mama." He kissed her cheek before leaving to go to the training grounds, trying to clear his head. Leaving her to her own musings watching the water dance with the wind.

"Ah, young love." Looking up to see Inu no Taisho coming to sit next to her.

"I'm not sure you'd call it love, more like a crush at this point." Laughing softly, remembering the days when it all seemed so dramatic at that age.

"Then what do you call your own feelings for my son?" Flickering her eyes at him with her lips held tight.

"Been spying on me?" Not enjoying his bellowing laughter quite as much as she usually did. 

"Not much else to do than watch the living." She groaned and laid back on the cool grass watching the clouds softly float across the sky.

"Watch somebody else, I don't need my slow slide into disaster to be seen more than it already is." He leaned over to force her to make eye contact.

"That is what you think? That loving him is a disaster." She moved her hair out from under her back and draped it over her shoulder.

"No. Loving him isn't he disaster. It's what will come when he finds the one he loves and knowing it won't be me. I'm nothing special and that's what he deserves. So just quit watching so when it all catches fire, I'll be the only one to watch it burn." Turning her head to look away from him, his eyes were too similar.

"You are special, Kaiya. Can't you see that?" Pitiful laugh escaping her lips.

"I'm special because of the Orb, it's the damned thing that made me special not myself. There's the difference, I wasn't born this way. I didn't earn this or even want it. I wouldn't have even been worth a second look to him if I didn't find it. So, no. I'm not special this piece of junk is." Pulling the orb out and throwing it as far as she could into the pond, seeing the waves ripple back towards her. Knowing it would find her soon.

"Listen to my words carefully. You were chosen because you are special, you weren't not made that way by the orb. You should value yourself higher than you do. I have met many people in my long life, even without your abilities, you are very unique and worthy of my son." Turning to look at him as she smiled, maybe she was being too hard on herself or trying to somehow deny herself of what she wanted. 

"I guess you're right, I am pretty awesome." They talked through the afternoon, she felt so relived to let everything out. No longer feeling as if the dam was going to break and flood everything inside her. 

.....

The evening meal was somewhat awkward for Nobou seeing as Kohaku was invited as well. The entire time he was talking of how he was a demon slayer and of his journeys, he wanted to shove the chopsticks down his throat. 

Afterward he went for a run trying to burn off the negative feelings he had inside, never had he felt so aggressive even after the man had left. He still had two years of this to go through before he could even ask to court her, he wasn't sure he would survive it.

......

Kai and Sesshoumaru sat next to each other drinking their nightly tea. "He does not like Kohaku." 

What she really wanted to say was 'no shit.' Going with a more strategic approach instead for her son's sake. "He's Inu and you know how your kind is with pack. He feels possessive of her and don't really give me that 'you're not possessive' crap. You are very much so."

"What is mine will always be mine." At least he didn't try to hide it, seemed more proud of it than anything, men.

"Yes, yes. Rin is his pack and closest friend. I'm not sure he understands how to process these feelings. Your father said they're stronger after puberty and his own father died before being able to teach about how to handle them." All she wanted was for him to be okay with things and be happy.

"I will talk with the boy." Giggling at the thought of what could very well end up with the 'birds and bees' talk. "Where is he?"

"He went for a run. I had told him exercise was how Takeo dealt with his more difficult feelings to clear his head. It seemed to work this afternoon until he got riled up again at dinner." He wondered if she talked about him more openly because she was more comfortable sharing with him, it pleased him.

"An intelligent man. I will teach Nobou of the youkai side of himself and you the human." She nodded in agreement, he really only could teach half of what Nobou needed to know. Well, more than half being they were both men.

"Speaking of puberty, I noticed Rin is beginning to bud. She'll start her womanly moon sickness soon." Watching as he rubbed his forehead with two clawed fingers which he only did when he was pressed with emotions he didn't want.

"No." Laughing loudly at this poor man having to come to terms with the difficult part of having a daughter.

"Oh, sweetie. It's not something you get a choice in. It'll be alright, I'll help you and her get through it." He chuckled at how absurd it all sounded to him, needing help with a daughter going through puberty of all things. Never did he think he would be where he was.

"This Sesshoumaru is not sweet." Looking at her wicked smile suddenly he didn't care what she called him.

"You are to me ...and Fluffy." He bent over and exposed her neck grabbing her hair and nipped her, knowing it would just make her giggle. 

"Unruly little human." Letting her hair fall back behind her shoulders, whispering in her ear as he grazed his fangs against her delicate neck. She smelled so enticing, delicious and of arousal. He couldn't tell if he was more wound up by her scent or angry knowing it called to him so strongly making him feel like his control was slipping.

"I'm... uh, going to go bathe. Yeah, bathe." Watching her slip away he felt as if overstepped, really he did, being caught up in the moment. He wouldn't blame her if he drove her away with his boldness, he left for a run thinking if it could help a teenage boy it certainly would help himself.

All she could think about was him the entire way to the bathhouse, she wanted him and wholly but couldn't go through with it. Knowing how she felt was one thing but she didn't know how he felt. Kai knew she couldn't give everything to him just to watch him end up with someone else, she needed his love to take the next step and so far she didn't know if he did.

....

Arriving to her room after her wonderfully relaxing bath she was startled when she heard a voice in the dark room.

"Give me the sword, human or I kill the half breed." She didn't have to turn around to know who was behind her.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Slowly turning to see her son beaten and bloodied being held against the shadow youkai with a dagger across his throat.

"You do know. There are only a handful of people who can use that ability. I've killed all the others and no more have resurfaced until now. So, when I heard a rumor of a Miko of Souls was right in the west... I told you I would find you." Her eyes turned black and she tried to fight back the urge deep inside her to leap at him, she needed to get her son away from that creature.

"I don't have the sword. Give me my son." Manic laughter echoed across the room sending chills down Nobou's spine.

"Well, then you can help me find who does. Come with me freely and I will release the boy. Fight and I will kill him and take you anyway." She wasn't sure what to do, needing to get him away from that creature was the only thought running through her frantic brain.

"Okay. I'll go with you." He released Nobou and he ran to her embracing her.

"No, don't go. It's not worth it, please don't go. Mama, please." He couldn't let go, he would do anything to prevent her from leaving.

"Take care of Kuma. Let my fluffy know I will be okay." Sesshoumaru, where was he? Why wasn't he here? He needed to find him and quickly. Nodding as he released her and picked up the unconscious dog, standing back to see his mother be taken into the shadows and disappear without a trace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Should have researched earlier but they didn't start celebrating birthdays until 1950's. The ancient philosophers believed everyone turned a year older on New Years. But seeing as I already had an earlier chapter with one, I went with it.


	22. Release

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fair warning, it is a little gruesome in this chapter and a lemon popped in as well. I hate to reveal too much and spoil anything but figured I'd give anyone an out who may want it.

Chapter 22: 

The moon was at it's highest point in the dark sky, feeling more in control he knew what he needed to do. He would apologize and explain things to her, maybe if more things were spoken it wouldn't have gone so badly. Though, she didn't hit him like she did Katsuo so it wasn't as bad as it could have been.

Walking down the hallway he was hit by the scent of blood before reaching her room. He threw the doors open to find Nobou slumped over against the wall with the dog whining softly, licking his face.

"Nobou." The boy didn't stir, going over to bend down next to him seeing his face bloodied and battered. Gently shaking his shoulder he repeated himself, the boy opened his eyes.

"Where were you? Why weren't you here? She sleeps with you every night and you weren't here. He took her, He took her." No longer being able to keep eye contact with the man who swore he would protect his mother, he looked away. Not bothering to try and hide the tears falling down his face smearing the blood further.

"Who took her? Where did they go?" It made him angry he wasn't here, was he so blind he couldn't see how she felt? How she trusted him? Was she just another woman to keep company to him until another came along? His mother deserved much better than him.

"Shadow youkai took her into the shadows. Mama was just gone, I begged her not to go... She should have let him kill me." Sesshoumaru stood and swiftly left, arriving to Jaken's room across the castle. He picked up the toad by the ankle out of his futon and drug him back to Nobou with him squawking the entire way.

"Find Botan, get the boy tended to. Then take the pups to Inuyasha." Pausing at the door before he left. "Take Katsuo for protection." 

"Oh yes my lord! Right away!" He didn't stay for an answer, he didn't have the time and knew the loyal toad would take care of what was demanded.

Searching the entire place for her scent not finding anything fresh. She seemed to have disappeared. Exhausting any hope of finding her scent he decided to look elsewhere. Transforming into his energy ball and began towards where Kai had said they would come from. He would tear the entire ground out to find her, knowing her scent never left the room they must have travelled differently, so it was the only place he could search.

....

It was disorienting to go from her room to a completely new place in just a few steps. Feeling dizzy, she slowly sat on the cold cave floor trying to gain her bearings.

"Get up." Tugging her arm roughly enough to scratch her with his claws as she pulled her arm out of his grasp, ripping her sleeve.

"I'm dizzy, idiot. Humans don't travel like that. I need a minute or I'll just end up on the ground as soon as I stand. Fucking moron." Laying down to press her face on the cool rock while taking deep breaths. 

"I don't have time for this." Yanking her up and throwing her over his shoulder, walking further into the cave system, not caring if she was properly covered.

Coming to a long passage before being thrown to the ground. Her injured hand felt worse, she may have reopened it but couldn't see anything in the pitch black. Only hearing his footsteps starting leave.

"Not even going to stay? Nobody is here. Don't be surprised if I'm gone when you get back." She always hated the darkness, it wasn't so much the dark itself, it was what she couldn't see in the darkness. Things were bad, she didn't regret her decision, she would do anything for her son.

Only laughter rang out as she heard his soft foot steps echoing further away from her. So many questions ran through her head, she didn't even know where to start. 

Waiting to hear the quiet again she got up and began to navigate the small cavern using the feel of her feet and hands. How did she get in here? There wasn't even a way to get out it seemed or she had missed it. Hours she went in circles around the room trying to find an opening to no avail. 

Finally giving up due to exhaustion and panic of being trapped, Kai curled up tucking her cold feet into the bag with the Orb, wrapping her arms around her knees. Just hoping she would be found. If anyone could find her, it would be him.

....  
Katsuo didn't question anything as he loaded up his dragon as well as Ah-Un. Helping Rin up and looking at the young man staring off, left empty inside grasping the dog for comfort. 

"Come on, we need to leave." Looking over at Katsuo with the blank stare in his violet eyes, it was haunting.

"I can't leave. I need to be here when she comes back, to go find her, to do something." He went over to him and put his arm around his shoulders, he knew how he felt. Having a mother of his own, he would destroy the world to find her.

"She needs you to be safe. I swear to you, we will find her. If we haven't by the time you have healed then I will take you myself to look for her." Bribing him into an embrace, Nobou rested his head against his chest trying to fight back the tears.

"I love her. She's the only mother I've ever known. Please don't let me lose her. Please." Smoothing his long black hair was the only thing he knew to do for him. Nothing would truly bring comfort. 

"I love her too, we won't lose her." She was the first woman to ever reject him, because of that he got know her and love her as a close friend. He would do anything for her.

Releasing him, Nobou jumped behind Rin and leaned against her. Tired and in pain, it was just best to leave and hope she would be found soon.

.....

Sesshoumaru arrived just as the sun was beginning to to peak in the sky and began hacking away at the land with Bakusaiga. After a few blasts a small crater had formed, there was no sign of the earth giving way to somewhere underneath. 

Not one to give up so easily he continued to use the yoki wave sending blasts of green light destroying more of the earth underneath him. He would continue until he found her and this was the only lead he had, he needed to find her. He would not lose her.

....

Suddenly being pulled upward being brought out to a large cavern. Furnished as a possible strong hold for soldiers, she assumed for the guards of the place. Though it looked unused for a long time. "He will watch you until I return." 

He left as the guard took her over to a table and shoved for her to sit. Her black eyes watched him as he brought over food for her and himself, to the innocent it may have looked to be a kind gesture. She knew it was because she was meant to be alive.

"You're one of those flying creatures, aren't you?" His crimson red skin and dark beady eyes were a giveaway for her. Having learned a little bit about youkai living in this era.

"Shut up and eat." Looking down to the bowl he placed in front of her to see raw meat and nothing else.

"I can't eat this. It's raw, don't you know anything about humans?" Making note of what weapons she could use to try to get away. A knife by the fire, a large sword by the bedding against the wall, dagger on his hip. She kept cataloging what could come in handy.

"Humans are disgusting creatures." His voice was low and throaty. He didn't bother to look up at her.

"Well this disgusting creature will die if she eats raw meat. I need it cooked." He looked over at her with irritation.

"Sounds like your problem." She wondered if her hands could even fit around his thick neck enough to stop his noisy breathing.

"Not really. Pretty sure if I die, they'll kill you for letting me." She could see the cogs turning painfully slow in his big bald head.

"Go cook your meat, puny human." She took the bowl over to the fire and dumped it in a wet pile close to the fire. No matter what she did, it was going to taste horrible.

Slowly poking at it with a flat rock trying to get it near burnt to help the taste. "Could just let me go, then maybe Lord Sesshoumaru will spare your life for your kindness." 

He only growled, okay so maybe that wasn't going to work. Needing a new tactic she sat cooking her food while she thought.

She was right, after it finished cooking it tasted absolutely disgusting. Not entirely sure she was happy to have anything in her belly at all, even after spending all that time without anything. 

She guessed middle of the day but had no idea, there was nothing to judge by. Sitting by the fire to warm herself after being cold for so long, it was a meager comfort. "Where did he go?"

"To our king." He sat on the bedding sharpening one of the larger swords, she knew she couldn't handle one that big well enough to kill him with it.

"When will he be back?" He was getting annoyed with her questions but didn't have anything else to do but answer them.

"Tomorrow night. Raizo can only travel when it is dark." Looking over at her as she stared at the fire, for a human she did look enticing and females were rare where he was from.

"Does that mean it's night now?" She saw him nod his head out of the corner of her eye. Either he was too stupid to realize she was drawing out any information she could or he simply didn't care. "May I have a blanket?" 

"Will you shut up if I give you one?" Even though she didn't answer he reached over and threw one at her. She stood and stretched her sore muscles out, her nightgown rising up to show her long bare legs.

Reaching down to gather the rough blanket, wrapping herself in it, aying down on the hard rock below her. Knowing she couldn't be able to sleep, still she closed her eyes and tried to push down the feeling of killing him. His soul was wretched nearly as much as the shadow, making it hard to temper those urges.

Eventually exhaustion won out and she drifted off into sleep, dreaming of the one who would come find her. She knew he would, he had to.

.....

Making camp, Rin came to sit next to Nobou. His face was swollen and discolored, she wanted nothing more than to take away his pain. Katsuo watched as he was perched in a tall tree as the girl grabbed Nobou's hand and held it.

"How are you feeling?" He was still angry, he needed to do something but was too badly injured, too young and too far from his mother.

"Fine." She pet the sleeping dog in his lap, knowing he was anything but fine.

"My Father will find her." He scoffed at her comment, completely out of character for himself.

"It's his fault she's gone. He took her in his bed every fucking night but last night. He wasn't there, he didn't protect her. She was just another woman to him." It hurt her to hear him say such angry things about her father, he was nothing but an honorable man.

"Don't say such things. It wasn't his fault and he hasn't had any woman from what I've seen living with him. He cares for her and would never allow anything to happen to her." Both sitting angry but never let go of the other's hand. 

"Where was he, Rin? Not there, not where he needed to be. And if he cared so much then why doesn't he court her? He just has her sneak into his room every night when they think we are asleep. I hear the doors, I hear the footsteps, I hear her giggling." Did her father really dishonor her like that every night? How had she not known? She felt like a fool.

Katsuo had enough and hopped down off the tree branch to stand in front of the two pups. "Now listen here, I understand you're angry but taking it out on Sesshoumaru isn't going to help. I know for a fact they have not been together in the way you are thinking. He holds her while she sleeps at night, nothing more, which is their private business not yours."

"You're fine with it? All of it? Wasn't she supposed to be yours until you let her get stabbed? You're just as bad as he is." He sighed and sat on the other side of Nobou.

"I failed her knowing she could be hurt in the situation we were in. Sesshoumaru didn't, she was taken from her room. It could have happened to any man. He will not rest until he finds her. Whether he realizes it or not, he loves her deeply and will never stop looking for her." He placed his hand on Nobou's shoulder as he stared at the young man.

"You think he really loves her?" Removing his hand and leaning back to stare at the fire.

"How could he not?" 

....

Kai just wasn't here, there was nothing but more ground and rock beneath him. Beginning to wonder if there was some sort of barrier involved keeping him from finding it. He needed a new plan and quickly, unsure how long she would survive in the heat. Standing in a crater thinking of her sweet face and needing to touch it again, feel her smooth skin under his fingertips.

He stood staring at the dark sky above him, trying to center himself so he could think more clearly. He knew she was strong and could handle herself but the worry still crept in.

.....

Being brought into consciousness from the blanket being pulled slowly off her body. She kept her eyes closed and listened to the heavy breathing near her ear. 

Trying to stay calm and pretend to sleep, she turned over on her back. It was always best to attack facing the person. She hoped he still had the dagger on his right hip.

Meaty hands sliding over her clothing, she wanted to throw up, she felt violated. Stay calm and breathe normally, it'll all be over soon. She felt his wet tongue lick her neck almost if she was made of candy. He cut the Orb's bag off her with the dagger and threw it aside, letting the dagger drop next to her left hand.

Feeling his body press against hers while thick fingers grasped her back pressing her more firmly against him. She slid her hand slowly grabbing the dagger by the hilt, making sure she had a firm grip.

Quickly she thrust it as hard as she could between them. He lurched back onto knees grasping at the bleeding hole in his thigh, damn she missed. She thrust again into his manhood, slicing to the right, causing him to screech in pain as he curled into a ball in his side.

She could escape, run, run now. Standing over the screeching man, she kicked him over onto his back. Straddling his chest, trapping his arms between her legs and plunged the dagger in over and over into his heart. He clawed at her back trying to stop her but his strength was already gone by the time she started, she had severed his manhood and was quickly bleeding out.

As she stabbed him over and over he stopped moving altogether, his breath stopped and finally his heart. She rose to her feet staring down at the bloodied man with a smirk on her face, calmly turned while she picked up the orb. Leaving the bag and left toward the opening of the cave still clutching the bloodied dagger.

After hours of walking through the cave system she finally found the sun rising in front of her. Relief flooded in after feeling trapped for so long in the dark. A steep drop over a rocky ledge she began downward. The rocks cut her feet and hands as she slid down to the path below her. 

Choosing to not take the path but to stay off of it so nobody could see her. By midday she reached the bottom of the mountain, dried blood left from her actions and fresh flowing from her wounds. She began walking towards anywhere but there, she needed to get away before the shadow found her again.  
....

"That's the village there." Calling over to Katsuo to signal him to land just outside of it.

Unloading the pups packs and carrying them himself. Nobou felt a little better, less angry after talking last night. It was a bit of comfort to know he may love her and most likely was as distraught as he was.

Met by Inuyasha who had seen the dragons flying towards the village, Rin ran to him and hugged him tightly. "What's wrong, Rin?"

"Shadow youkai took Kai and father sent us here until he finds her. Took her out of her room into the shadows." He looked up to see Katsuo carrying the packs and Nobou walking beside him clearly having been attacked.

"Nobou." Bringing his eyes up from the ground to meet Inuyasha's, already he could see the pain in the young man's eyes.

"Sesshoumaru sent us here to keep the pups safe and asked me to protect them." Inuyasha nodded and turned to walk towards the village. 

"That is Katsuo. Father's first in command." Inuyasha put his arm around his niece while walking.

"Then you will be well protected here." Nobou stopped to put Kuma down after he whined to use the bathroom. Inuyasha stopped but continued after meeting Katsuo's gaze and nodded.

"That's Inuyasha. He's like me." Katsuo let out a small laugh.

"Really? I couldn't tell." Nobou let out a small huff with an even smaller smile, of course that was obvious. He just didn't know what to say.

"Hey, while we are here we can see what a human village is like. I heard their crop die every season and they have to start over." Nobou looked at his green eyes and knew he was going to try anything to take his mind off his mother.

"Sounds ridiculous, I'm sure that is just folklore." Katsuo was right, maybe learning about his human side more would help him keep his feelings in check until he could do something about them. "Kuma, you can't pee on every tree." 

....  
Seeing the mountains in front of him in the dim moonlight he began to wonder if there was a way inside through a passage within them. Already having dug down as deep as the mountain was high, it seemed the next step to take. 

Leaping up and flying over the mountain to the other side, he couldn't see anything with it so dark, he needed to wait until sunlight where things could be seen easier. It didn't stop him from searching for an opening until then.

After the fourth cave system he searched gave nothing away to him he was getting even more angry. They took what was his, he needed to find them, feel their flesh beneath his claws.

The wind changed directions and blew down from the north towards the mountains. Blood, he couldn't tell if it was hers or not it was mixed with someone else's. Lavender, rising up higher into the sky searching the ground below him, he saw a small figure moving through the forest.

The closer he got the more sure he was of himself, it was her. Coming to stand in front of her as she stared at him without saying anything. Her eyes faded from pitch black back to their normal blue. She was covered in blood, caked in it, from someone else. Immediately knowing she had killed.

Why didn't she say anything? Did she blame him for her being taken? She should, he failed her and wasn't there. She should hate him for allowing such a thing to happen, never should have been put in a situation to kill. The leaves rustled as the wind blew through the trees, she continued staring at him silently.

He took one step closer to her, she didn't move staying completely still watching him, he continued. What happened to her to make her so silent? Hearing her drop the dagger from her hand followed by the thump of the orb. 

She looked up at his golden eyes, making no further movement. Softly whispering "I killed."

"I know." The earth seemed to stand still around them, only the whisper of the wind coming through the trees.

"Nobou?" He pulled her hair away from her face, it made a crisping noise from the dried blood as it stuck to her face.

"He will heal." Tilting her face gently to look at him, he needed to see her eyes more clearly. The sunlight shone through the treetops, he almost wondered if she was real by the way she glowed from it.

"Take me home." He needed her to know what she meant to him, needed to say so much but he couldn't find the words. Bending down to softly kiss her lips before placing the orb in her hands, lifting her in his arms to take her home.

....

It was a longer journey being as far out as they were and he had to travel at a slower pace than in his energy ball form. He needed her to get the blood off, to smell like herself again. It was getting late, soon stopping at a hot spring, setting her gently down as the sun began to set behind them.

"Take off your clothing." It didn't take much for her to understand she needed to bathe. Slowly sliding off what little she had on and walking into the hot spring. It stung all over, mostly the big one she still had stitches in on her hand and her back. Closing her eyes as she leaned against a large boulder. 

It took everything in him to not go back immediately and try to kill anyone he found after seeing her back. It was more important to get her home and taken care of first.

"This feels nice." Hearing the quiet sounds of movement in the water and feeling his hands washing the blood off her arms. "You don't have to do that, I can." 

"I failed you." Moving her to make her dip her hair into the water as he scrubbed the blood out of it.

"You didn't." She always enjoyed the feeling of his claws running through her hair. She lifted her head and turned to look at him. He did something he had never done before and nuzzled her, apologizing.

"Please, don't. There isn't anything to apologize for." He saw sincerity in her eyes and something else he couldn't name. He didn't understand how she couldn't think this was his failure.

"You are too forgiving, Kai." A small laughed leapt off her lips, she had heard that dozens of times in her lifetime.

"Well Kaiya does mean forgiving." She placed her hands on his chest as he wiped away the blood on her face.

"I will kill them all for what they have done." It wasn't a threat, it was a statement of fact. There wouldn't be even one left after he found them.

She finished bathing, which consisted of him bathing her and not hearing of anything else. She felt maybe it made him feel more at peace doing it, as if washing the blood off washed away the unsettled feelings he had locked inside. Watching as he became more himself and less on edge.

"I don't have anything to wear." He left the hot spring, going over to his clothing and gathering some things. Helping her out and drying her with mokomoko before wrapping her in his outer kimono.

It was one of the sweetest things he had ever done for her. She just wished he wasn't stark naked through the entire thing, it made her blush seeing every part of him so close and out of the water. He put on the rest of his clothing and armor, afterward building a fire for her to be warmer. Making sure to burn her clothing.

He took her with him as he hunted for her something to eat, cooking it she was elated at how good it tasted. As she sat against the tree watching him as he built the fire back up, she almost told him how she felt then, it was getting harder not to.

Smiling as he placed her in his lap and wrapped her with his mokomoko. He held her tightly through the night as she slept as soundly and deeply as she always did in his arms. Tomorrow could be for answers, tonight was for them. Waiting until she was asleep, he took off into the night sky.

....

"Lady Kaede, is there anything I may do for you?" She sat making a stew for dinner after the three had settled in her home.

"No, my child. Let me take care of you, it is my calling in life." Still feeling like he should do something to help her, he would make sure to wash the dishes no matter how much she protested. Nobou detested feeling useless and not doing anything.

"You need to rest, Nobou." Rin brought over bowls for the stew to be placed in, he wished he could take her place.

"If you are anything like a Inuyasha, the more you rest the quicker you will heal. Now the tricky part is to get him to rest. There have been a few times where we had to deal him inside using sutras." Chuckling at how stubborn the man was, if he felt he needed to be elsewhere damn anything that got in his way.

"All Inu are too headstrong for their own good. I remember once, when we were kids, my mother told Sesshoumaru he couldn't cut down a large tree with his bare claws. We were small only about five or six, it took him nearly two months but he sure enough did it." It didn't matter if it was pouring down rain, everyday he went to that tree and hacked at it with his claws.

"Why?" He knew how small he was and how little damage his own claws to do at that age, it didn't make much sense.

"If anyone asked him he would just say 'I do I as please'. Kids do strange things at that age anyway but I always thought it was more than he was told he couldn't." It was always so much fun growing up with him, he enjoyed how stubborn he was.

"He really will find her, won't he?" Rin brought over food for them, before sitting next to Nobou.

"Of course he will." 

....

When she awoke, he was carrying her inside the castle up to Botan's. She didn't want to go to the healer first, wanting to be alone with him longer. Things would seem more real once others were involved. 

"Where are the injuries?" Sesshoumaru sat her down on the bedding and began to undress her, making her heart beat faster. 

"Majority is on her back." Mostly just scratches but a few deep gouges where she had been frantically clawed as she killed the man. As well as a dark purple mark, the same color as her other markings, on her right shoulder. A small mark running downward, she shivered as he traced it with his fingertip.

"I see." Beginning to clean and address the wounds, finding more every time he looked over her skin. The ones on her arm required a few stitches from when she pulled her arm from the shadow, her hand required two new ones.

"Thanks, Botan. I feel much better now, though your stitches hurt." He took her hand in his and looked into her eyes, she should seem more distressed over it all. Whatever she went through seemed a lot, other than her injuries she seemed perfectly fine.

"Are you alright?" Looking at her smiling face and bright eyes, he knew she was but couldn't understand why.

"Of course I am, you just patched me up." He reached down and gave her a pouch of herbs, she refused them. "I want to be clear headed." She hugged him and began to walk out the door with Sesshoumaru picking her up taking her to her room. 

"Do you think I can bathe if I remove the bandages first so they don't get wet? I didn't think about asking first." She threw the orb to the floor as they neared her room and giggled as it kept rolling after them, it reminded her of BB-8. Kami she missed movies, it would be a perfect day to be curled up with one.

"You will eat first." She wondered when he had spoken to Jiro, seeing food and tea in her room on a tray beside the bedding. She didn't wake until they had passed through the main room after the doors and he was usually there when Sesshoumaru returned, thinking it had to be then.

"Take your armor off. He won't come for me until the night." Setting her down gently before sitting back on his heels.

"How do you know?" She leaned over and grabbed a bowl, beginning to eat. 

"Raizo, the shadow guy, can only travel through the shadows at night. He had left to meet with the king last night and the guard told me he would be back tonight. I guessed it was to take me there or the king to come to meet me, I'm not sure." She didn't kill the shadow but the guard, he planned on staying close to her anyway but now felt more strongly about it.

"Where were you?" When he didn't reach to remove his armor, she put down her bowl rising to her knees. Coming to the first tie and beginning to work on it, he placed his hand on hers.

"In a cave in the mountain. First I was in a room with no way in or out until he had to leave and left me with a guard. I guess they can't travel like he can, so he had to move me." Removing her hand he began to undo the armor and place it aside not for himself but for her.

"How did you escape?" She didn't want to tell him that part, knowing he would be angry what the man had done to her and she felt uneasy admitting all what she had done.

"I fell asleep by the fire and woke up to him, pressed against me. When I felt him cut my bag off me and drop the dagger next to my hand... I took it." Handing him the other bowl of food, she was hesitant telling him the rest. She had seen him kill but it was swift and clean. 

When he didn't say anything she knew he was waiting for her to continue. "I stabbed downward toward him cutting the inside of his thigh. He leapt back off me and I cut his manhood. I had a chance to escape then, I'm sure he was bleeding out and would have died anyway but I didn't leave."

"He was curled over on his side, I kicked him to his back and got on top of him trapping his arms with my legs. I then stabbed him as much as I could, even after I was sure he was dead." The entire time her voice was even and never broke, she was fine with what had happened. She had her justice and knew she had saved any other person from that man.

"Did he succeed in taking you?" Shaking her head, she couldn't bear the thought of things having gone further than being groped by that nasty creature.

"What does the sword do?" Maybe if she knew what it could do she would know what to do with it.

"It is said to banish your foes into another world as well as the ability to turn day into night." Maybe that's what it was, it banished people to the hot middle earth. 

"If it can change day into night, maybe that's what they want to do. Where the shadow youkai can bring them into our world." She thought a little longer about it. "What if they were banished to there and are trying to escape it." 

"It is possible. It had been in the hands of Katsuo's father for almost eight hundred years, not much is known about the sword." She nodded her head, she understood. She shadow needed to be destroyed if he could travel between the worlds as well as the sword itself.

"Eat. Then you can bathe me again." Smirking as she saw his eyes narrow at her, he could see she was trying to distract him from things. 

"If that is what you wish." She bit her bottom lip thinking of all the things she really wanted him to do. Coming out of her little fantasy from the pain across her back.

"I'll wake Nobou after, so I can check on him. I bet Botan gave him all sorts of herbs." Finishing her food and starting to drink some tea. 

"He and Rin are with Katsuo. I sent them to Inuyasha." That was a logical reaction, to move the children to safety. She knew he wouldn't say it but Inuyasha was the one he trusted most with them.

"I guess that explains why Kuma hasn't been in here yet. I told Nobou to take care of him, so he must have taken him." A little sad they were all gone but knew it was safest for them until things weren't so dangerous. "How was my son?"

"He will heal." Placing her cup down and grabbing his hand, she needed his reassurance.

"That's not what I meant." He moved the bowl of food, untouched away from him, adjusting to encase her hand in his.

"Angry with me, rightfully so. He asked why I was not with you like every night, I did not answer him." His gaze was too intense to keep it, she look down at their hands.

"I was going to, after my bath. By then he already had Nobou." She wanted to ask where he was, why he didn't hear anything. Was he not in the castle at all?

"I believe he took Nobou after seeing me leave, knowing you were vulnerable." It explained why he had waited so long to come for her, he was biding his time until he knew he could.

"Where did you go?" He held her hand tighter as if the answer would drive her away.

"I went for a run to clear my thoughts." Were they doing this now? She wasn't sure she wanted to press on but needed to know.

"You were angry with me for leaving." Her heart was pounding waiting for the answer, she unknowingly held her breath.

"Angry with myself for going further than you were comfortable with." It made him feel weak being controlled by his more base instincts he had long since suppressed.

"That's... not why I left." She supposed it was a good a time as any, if he rejected her she only had to spend the next few days glued to his hip. Kai just couldn't bear the thought of him thinking it was something he had done wrong.

"You do not owe me any explanations." He was giving her an out, letting her keep things unsaid and hidden. 

"I just can't cross that line with you. I know one day you'll end up with someone else and I know that when that time comes I won't be able to stop loving you but it won't hurt as badly not having gone that far." It was out and in the least romantic way possible but she needed him to know it wasn't ever anything he did.

"You love me." He sounded surprised to her, had nobody ever said that to him before in the way she had? 

"Yes, I love you." Still looking down, she again to fidget with the wrapping on her hand. "I don't expect you to return it, I never really thought I'd even tell you. I needed you to know you didn't do anything wrong, it wasn't unwanted." He wished she would look up at him, not sound ashamed of herself.

"There will be no other." Placing his hand on her cheek to lift her eyes to his gaze. "Only you." Cheeks pinking she never looked more beautiful to him than in that moment.

This was not how he had wanted things to go, it was supposed to be more formal and done properly. Not all come out in a tangled mess from her being taken.

It wasn't a grand declaration of love to most but it was for him. He may not have said the words themselves, it was damn near close enough for her. 

She leaned up and kissed him, it felt like an eternity waiting for another like they had so long ago. Her hands tangled in his silvery hair he moved his hand to her back to bring her closer and she winced. Fuck everything.

"Come, let's get you bathed." Picking her up and carrying her to the bathhouse, the sun shone brightly as if it was smiling for her. She didn't know what the future held for them but was full of hopes she didn't have before. Maybe being taken in the middle of the night by psychopaths wasn't such an awful thing.

....

Pulling his Obi off her and sliding down his own kimono off her body, he wanted to see this sight again. When she was healed and things were gone through the proper order to get there.

"I will have Botan come redress the wounds afterwards." She nodded as she began toward the steps, he caught her hand and pulled her to sit on the bench. "Wait."

She watched as he fully undressed and brought the proper soaps and wash cloths to the edge of the water. Picking her up she couldn't help but notice how smooth his skin felt against hers.

"Thank Kami for soaps." Or anything that distracted her from his perfect body at the moment.

Descending into the warm water and placing her on a ledge, she dipped her hair into the water and enjoyed the feeling. Sesshoumaru turned her around and began to soap her long sandy blonde hair. 

"You have a new marking." She snorted it sounded absurd, of course she did, she was scratched to hell.

"Uh yeah, I got kind scratched up. There's lots." She washed the soap out of her hair already feeling better and cleaner.

"No, one like your other markings." Running his hand over her arm.

"Oh. Where?" Trying to look where she could see it.

He traced over it and she looked over her right shoulder to see as thin straight line about four inches long matching her the color of her hands' markings.

"Weird." Touching it herself, she noticed it felt like a minor burn. Somewhat like it felt when she got her original ones but much less painful.

He picked up the wash cloth and soaped it with her favorite bath oils, beginning to gently wash her back of what he could. It still stung a bit, overall felt nice as if he was cleansing the blood off her all over again. Removing any trace of her earlier actions, she felt more of herself.

"When can we bring them back home?" He moved washing down her arm, coating her in the calming scents. 

"When it safe." Washing the other arm while still standing behind her.

"What if he doesn't come for me tonight? I can't be without them that long." He brought the cloth up rubbing it along her collar bone he seemed hesitant to move further, last night he needed to. There was blood that needed washed off but now... she brought her hand up over his and moved it over her breasts, needing him to know she trusted him.

"I will take you to the pups and go to find him myself." Sliding down to wash her stomach and sides, she leaned back against his chest.

"I don't want to be without you." Sesshoumaru moved to sit and pulled her into his lap, bringing her legs over his thighs and began washing them.

"It is necessary." She wrapped her arms around his shoulders, he felt the silkiness of her breasts teasing against his bare chest. It was nearly overwhelming.

"I may be able to help. After I heal I can try to use the sword to open a gate to their world, then you can kill them all." Her voice was sweet and melodic he wanted her even more how natural she sounded about it all.

"We will discuss this after you have healed." She pouted before kissing him tenderly on his lips, if he knew this is how it would have been he would have spoken to her much sooner.

"Will you take me tomorrow to the haven before we leave for the pups?" He was pretty sure there was some sort of rule where he had to say yes in this situation, even more so she used the correct term.

"Hn." Scooping her up and carrying her out of the water to the bench, handing her a towel. She slowly dried off, it may have been how she always dried off but it seemed painfully slow watching her rub her body with the towel.

As she dressed in her robe, a few blood stains appeared much to his annoyance. She was worse off than he originally thought. Taking her to her own room, he called for Jiro to go fetch Aki and Botan. 

"I'm okay, really. You don't have to have everyone fuss over me." Standing she went over to her chest of drawers and pulled out her favorite nightgown, the red one with long sleeves she had worn on her first spirit journey. As well as pulling out black silk panties, she missed elastic but the small tie to keep them up wasn't much of a bother to her, the ribbon was rather cute.

"Lie down." Taking the clothing from her and putting them on top of the chest, picking her up to replace her where she was. 

"Yes, Lord Fluffy." Lying on her stomach for comfort watching him stand by the doors waiting, he seemed impatient. Though she thought she spied a small smile on his lips.

"Why did you follow me, after you caught me?" She had always wondered why, it seemed somewhat out of character for him.

"I found you interesting to watch." Kai giggled knowing it must have been like watching a train wreck, not able to look away. 

Aki and Botan arrived and took to taking care of her, she felt better already and felt it was unnecessary. Removing her robe and lying on her stomach again as Aki licked her wounds. It somewhat disturbed Sesshoumaru seeing the woman who was more of a mother to him licking the woman he cared for. 

The visit was short, her wounds felt better already even more so than when Katsuo had healed her before. She wondered if she had some sort of numbing property as well in her saliva that Katsuo lacked.

Standing at the doors after closing them he looked over her as she dressed herself, angelic and gentle. He wondered if she knew he labored seeing her in that particular clothing. "I need to dress."

"It's still sunny outside, I'll be alright. Put on your night clothes, might as well. It's almost evening time anyway." Smiling at her own secrets as to why she wanted him in less clothing. 

The logic seemed sound but he couldn't help but feel she had alternative motives, especially with the wicked smile she wore.

Returning within a few moments she knew he used his speed to change, knowing he didn't want to chance anything with her being alone. She patted the bedding next to her, he came over to relax there.

Picking up the book next to her she began to read from it.

"Lost deep in the hills,  
Perhaps the hamlet suffers   
From storms, windy chills.    

Did I read that right?" Pointing at the small passage, he leaned closer to see. 

"Yes." Wrapping his arm around her waist, holding her closer.

"You don’t know this already?  
Everything changes, nothing’s steady. 

Isn't that the truth? Sōchō seems to be a very smart man. Who knows what things will be like in a year, three, five? It's so unpredictable." Kai leaned more into him, he was steady in her life no matter how much it had changed.

"With every gust of wind, the butterfly changes its place on the willow." Whispering into her ear, stirring the butterflies inside herself.

"Why did your mother have you learn so many poems?" From what little he had spoken of her, she seemed to have a reason behind every action.

"To properly court a woman." The lessons she had learned in school came flooding back to her, how could she have forgotten? Letting the book fall into her lap and covering her face with her hands to hide her reddening face.

"Kami, I must seem like an aggressive woman to you. I had learned about it in school but completely forgotten. I'm so sorry." Hearing him chuckle as she felt her hands being removed from her face, Kai looked into his eyes. Of course he would be amused by this.

"I returned your poem with another." His lips almost touching hers. "I knew what I was doing." Kissing her wholly, she felt like she could die with the electricity she felt just by his kiss. 

Rising to her knees she straddled his lap, her lips never leaving his. Wrapping her arms around his neck, trying to be closer to him.

She was injured, he should stop this before it went too far. A little more couldn't hurt before he did, placing his hand on her jawline and neck he deepened the kiss, reveling in the taste of wild strawberries.

Kai brought her hand down, inside his kimono feeling his bare flesh beneath her hand, she needed more. Letting her hand dip further to his tie and pulling it, feeling his hand stop her. She wasn't letting him get out of this one, she dropped her other hand and moved his out of the way, finally removing the tie.

Sesshoumaru broke the kiss running his fangs along her neck, making her shiver. "We should not go further."

Not listening to a word he was saying, she slipped his clothing off his broad shoulders. "You talk too much." Hearing him chuckle in her ear.

Moving her hips, she rubbed against him reveling he was completely nude, as his hard cock rubbed against her bare thigh with the action. The scent of her arousal was near deafening to any sensibility he had left.

"You are injured." He felt her hands pull away, he leaned back sure she was listening to him and coming to her senses. She tugged her nightgown off, pressing herself against him harder. He found it cute how aggressive she was and knew what she wanted making him want her even more.

"I'm always injured." Kissing his neck up toward his pointed ear. "No grace, remember?" Nibbling on his earlobe he no longer cared to stop her, he wanted her. 

Grabbing her hips, grinding himself against her heat and black silken panties earning a soft sigh in his ear. Pulling her toward him further, kissing her fiercely as if he didn't, he would wake form this dream.

"I need you, Sesshoumaru." Bringing his hand to her supple breast begging for him to take her. Placing her hand around his hardness, beginning to stroke him slowly. Her hand felt so good around him, he wanted to lie her down and plunge into her sweetness he knew was waiting for him. 

He untied the black bow on her panties and helped her slip them off, she stayed on her knees as she straddled waiting for him to take her. She couldn't understand why he still seemed so hesitant. Rubbing herself on his head, arousing herself further and slowly torturing him. He clung to her shoulders, resting his forehead on one before dipping his head down to capture her dark pink nipple in his mouth, hearing her sharp breath as he did.

Growing tired of waiting, she plunged herself around him, gasping with pleasure. He filled her, not just in body but heart and soul. She felt complete. Releasing her captured nipple to kiss her with every fiber of his being.

Kai felt powerful hearing his breathing quicken, knowing it was because of her. Moving her hips to slide him in and out of her, heart pounding as the pleasure built inside her. 

Grabbing her hips, he needed her to end the slow thrusts and took over moving her faster while moving his. She felt perfect around him, there could be no pleasure to compare how she felt. Her small gasps and deep breaths made his skin tingle like it never had before, forcing him to thrust harder into her.

Nearly losing himself as she tilted her hips forward forcing him deeper inside her. "Kai." 

Resting her head against his chest, the feeling of release not far off. A small moan slipped her lips, her body tightened as he felt her quiver around him, sending him over the edge to release into her. 

Their bodies slowly stilled, breathing becoming slower coming down from what was a solid promise to each other. There could be no other for either of them. Tilting her head upward to look into her eyes before kissing her sweetly. 

Nothing ever went according to plan with her, he should have courted her and mated her before he allowed this to happen. Instead of feeling powerless to his more base instincts, he was grateful for them. Sharing her body with him made him feel stronger and more sure of himself. 

"I love you, my little human."


	23. Tsuihō gēto

Chapter 23:

As they laid tangled together, trying to be as close as they could, she felt happy, truly happy. She had never expected any of this to happen for her again and felt lucky to have found him.

"The sun is beginning to set. We should dress." Right, insane people were after her. Completely having forgotten about it all as they had laid in silence soaking up the feel of the other's body.

"Well I guess if that's what you really want." Feeling his laughter rumbling through his chest.

"I would rather stay like this. However, fighting naked is undesirable." Making sure to put on her best pout, she began to pull away from him.

"I suppose we could always have tomorrow before we go get the pups and go to the haven." Pulling her to his lips, kissing her tenderly. If things went the way he planned they would have every day together like this.

"If you do not wish to have Jiro see your glorious naked body, you might hurry. He is coming with food." Enjoying watching her eyes widen and pop quickly up to find her clothing.

Just as she got it on there was a knock at the door and the doors slid open. Bringing in food and tea for them with an extremely rare smile on his face. Setting it down next to the futon he turned to Sesshoumaru, "it took you long enough." 

Instead of the usual growl she expected, he chuckled while smiling at him. Making her turn as red as a ripe tomato, burying her face in her knees. "Kami, you two are trying to kill me. I just know it."

Jiro left and Sesshoumaru went to gather clothing from his room. Soon they could share a room and not have to bother with the nonsense of having two.

Returning he began to dress in his usual attire in his hands while she began to eat, noticing there were plenty of strawberries. "Now if you were going to dress back into your normal clothes why did you change into night ones when I requested?"

"You seemed adamant about it and now I see why." She popped an entire strawberry in her mouth trying to hide her smile, making him know for sure she had planned this to some degree.

"I donno wha you taling abou." Completely unconvinced he stared at his little human, eyebrow raised as she tried to play innocent talking with a mouth full of strawberry.

As he was tying the obi he saw her nose crinkle, realizing exactly why she needed him to change. "The obi." 

"I can barely get my own into a simple knot and half the time I just tie a bow. I mean, come on, a lot of the time you have to tie it for me. Sometimes Katsuo has to fix when I do it because it slowly comes undone during training. Those things are horrid to tie and just as horrid to untie." Might as well let him know, he seemed to have it all figured out anyway.

"I will teach you." Placing his armor and swords on before attaching mokomoko.

"Or you could let me wear things I used to before I came here, there aren't any ties on those." The displeased look he gave her, she knew he would have absolutely none of that.

"I will not have my mate wearing concubine attire." Coming to sit next to her as he began to eat as if he didn't just say any of that at all. Her heart began pounding in her chest, trying to escape.

"Your mate? As in your mate, mate? Your wife? Me?" Why on earth couldn't she shut her mouth, she was pretty sure he knew what she was asking.

"We will have the ceremony on the next crescent moon, as is tradition with my family line. Youkai and human ceremony." She couldn't tell if he was demanding, asking or even just stating a fact.

"What?" Her voice came out much more squeaky than she had anticipated. "Aren't you supposed to ask me?"

"I am required to ask your pack. I am your pack Alpha. Are humans different?" He knew very little about humans and until Rin demanded to be in his life, he hadn't cared to.

"I guess it's much the same for humans in this era. Your children would be hanyo." It was a little much to go from not knowing how he felt to suddenly getting married within a few hours.

"I have thought of our future pups." For the first time he understood his father's love for Izayoi. He would lay down his life for Kai just the same as he did for her.

"I won't be subservient." Hearing him chuckle while picking up her tea, taking a sip. She looked over the cup at him to see joy in his eyes.

"Undoubtedly. Do you accept?" Easing to her knees she kissed him, somehow she managed to have him fall in love with her and wasn't about to question it.

"Yes." Whispering against his lips, he slipped his tongue into her mouth to taste her once more. She was addictive and he would never tired of tasting her, reluctantly pulling away, he needed to be on alert. The sun was almost gone.

"Finish eating so you can sleep." Kai complied with his request, she was rather tired still. Figuring it had to do with being in soul judgment form for so long and how little sleep she had gotten. The feeling of being trapped had certainly drained her.

Finishing and finally laying down, she couldn't be any happier as she closed her eyes. He sat beside her bedding waiting for the Raizo to come for Kai. Soon it would all be over and no longer her life in danger.

The night crept by silently, until it was half way through, when he came in through the shadows. "Give her to me and I will spare your life." 

"Nothing will spare yours." Kai awoke staring at the two men about to fight, she knew Sesshoumaru would kill him.

"Come little girl." His voice sent a chill over her skin as if it was death itself coming from his mouth.

"I'm never going with you." Bringing his eyes back to Sesshoumaru he swiped at him with his claws, easily being avoided.

Sesshoumaru was finished listening to anything that came from him, he needed his flesh beneath his claws. To feel his life drain away from him while staring into his eyes.

Grabbing the shadow by the neck and lifting him upward. "You took what is mine and will pay for it." Slowly leaking his poison into his spine, Raizo never cried out, only grabbing Sesshoumaru's wrist.

"Come to me with the sword." Raspy voice calm and controlled she watched with black eyes, only to see him disappear taking Sesshoumaru with him before she could blink.

"No, Sesshoumaru!" Scrambling to where they were standing in the dark room she knew he was gone. "No, no, no." 

Kai went over and frantically pulled the bottom drawer struggling to pull it out and toss it aside. She dug down to the puzzle locks and pulled the hidden door open. Grabbing the sword she ran as fast as she could to where she knew there was open ground, not wanting to risk anyone being hurt if she collapsed the castle. 

Arriving at the training grounds she pulled it from its sheath, raising it above her head she swung down. Nothing happened, again and again no results, not even a flicker of life within the sword. 

"Kaiya, what is wrong?" Jiro standing behind her as she frantically tried to open the gate.

"The shadow took him. I have to open the gate or he will be trapped there. I have to, I have to." Tears started to form in her eyes, she couldn't lose him. She knew he would never be killed by them but without her, he would be trapped and that was almost just as horrible.

"What can I do to help?" The tears started to fall down her face, not again. This can't happen to her all over again. Trying to think clearly, her eyes darting back and forth as she tried to figure out what she needed to do.

"Katsuo. I need him here, now." Pausing before she finally turned to him. "Tell him to leave the pups there, it's not safe here. Give them my love." 

Turning back to the open field to continue trying anything as the orb came and hit her heels. Kai wouldn't let this happen again, she wouldn't lose him. She was stronger than this and would destroy all of them when she got through. Every fucking last one of them.

....

Three days passed and she refused to leave the area trying her hardest to open the gate, even just a small enough one for her to fit through. She begged and pleaded with the Kami above to let her through with no avail, she was alone.

Only to collapse from exhaustion and be carried to her room each night by Botan or Jiro who either stayed with her trying to get her to rest.

It was the afternoon, Jiro was trying to feed her, she had barely eaten anything since he disappeared. Katsuo arrived and went straight to where she was, stopping her from swinging the sword, embracing her.

"I need to open the gate, he is trapped there." The first words she had spoken in days, he understood what it meant to her.

"You can't open the gate if you are not strong. Let's eat, bathe and sleep. After we will work on it together." Looking into her eyes and she shook her head, she was afraid to stop.

"I can't, I just can't. I need to do this now." Jerking herself away from him, she turned and began to try again. 

"Kai, you need to listen to me. Without a clear head and strong body it will never open. At least come inside and we will eat." Was he right? Was she wasting time by not caring for herself? Dropping the sword down placing it in the sheath, she began walking to the dinning room. 

"I need you to put something in her food and drink to make her sleep. She won't do it willingly." Whispering low enough where she couldn't hear before catching up to her as they walked inside.

She paced the room waiting for the food as the orb followed her back and forth, reminding him of a trapped tiger. She very well was just as fierce. "Stupid fucking ball! You didn't even warn me!" 

Kicking it across the room, she was extremely angry. Jiro brought in fresh food and placed a finger inside the dish she was meant to eat from, making eye contact with Katsuo.

Picking her up as she fought to get free and sat down with her in his lap. If he needed to feed her like a child, he would. She reluctantly ate as he fed her, still clutching the sword with both hands tightly with an angry scowl on her face.

"Maybe, maybe they took him back to the cave I was in. Take me there." As he fed her more food and her eyes began to get harder to hold open.

"I can take you anywhere you need to go." Another bite, the bowl was nearly gone. She was struggling to hold her head upright. 

"Take me there now." Forcing her to eat more and brining her cup to her lips, she drank leaning her head against his shoulder.

"You just have to finishing eating first." Giving her the last few bites, she couldn't keep her eyes open any longer.

Finally she succumbed to sleep in his arms, taking the sword from her and placing it on his own hip. Jiro came in from waiting outside the door.

"Get Botan, we will need to bathe and redress her wounds." He had so few answers, even less ideas of what to do at that point. Taking her to her room and lying her down on top of her futon staring down at her. She had lost her sanity seeing him being swept away to a world she couldn't get to. 

The faint scent of sex lingered in the room, blood from the other youkai stained on the floor, so many tears filled the air. Her long hair a tangled mess strewn about her, her nightgown looked a mess with dirt all over it, her legs and feet. 

He would take care of her and make sure they opened the gate but knew it was going to take a while to unlock the power. Never having learned to do it himself, giving up long ago, knowing he wasn't the right person to wield the sword.

Then men arrived with the things needed to get her cleaned up. "Her bedding needs to be changed as well." 

"She has fought anyone trying to come in here. Poor thing is just so distraught we thought it best to leave it until you could come." Kneeling down next to her, as Botan began to remove her clothing with Katsuo's help. 

"She's a strong woman and knows what she wants. We will have to help her whether she wants it or not." Botan washed her while Katsuo dried, turning her over to wash her back he saw the scratches and new marking.

"What happened to her?" Botan wasn't sure, he could only guess by what he knew as a healer and his dealings with the last Miko of Souls. Shaking his head, whatever it was, it wasn't good.

"They look to me like claw marks and this here," pointing to the marking. "Is her first kill. I had no had a chance to talk to her about it. She seemed not willing to share yet anyway."

Jiro left for new bedding, he knew exactly why she didn't allow him to. It was too painful, as if it was ridding any last trace of him and accepting he was gone.

Taking to licking her skin to heal the wounds faster, he could taste her honey skin as well as a hint of snow. Leaving no doubt left in his mind they had been together that night.

....  
Within an instant he was transferred to the place where so many had been banished. Wasting no time to finish off Raizo, he couldn't risk him going back to hurt her, even if it meant him being trapped there. 

Raizo laughed as he was dropped to the ground. "Stay trapped here or she will come. Either way we will all leave his hell." 

Sesshoumaru slashed his stomach open and reached inside him as the man continued to manically laugh, pulling out his organs. Not even this gave him some sort of satisfaction. Clawing his heart still beating inside his chest, filling it with poison. Raizo laughed until his heart finally disintegrated into nothing.

Standing over the body he was angry, needing to kill more he set off walking towards a large canyon he saw off in the distance. Knowing her as well as he did, she would come for him and needed to have them dead by then. He would find the so called king and kill him twice if tensaiga would allow it. 

By the third day he had noticed the beings sent here were being transformed slowly into the creatures they had seen, they weren't natural. Choosing to eat and drink very little to avoid it if it had to do with the food and water there. Wondering if the king, who was not transformed, had something to do with it but chose to take precautions.

....

It had been nearly three months, every day she was one step closer to opening the gate. Having mastered turning day into night with ease, irritating her the gate only seemed to fade before she was close enough to go through. Frustrating her further but giving her hope she would master it as well.

"I feel like it will happen today." Stretching as stood from eating breakfast with the pups. Katsuo had told her Sesshoumaru most likely killed him right away and there wasn't much of a risk. She knew it was more to give her some sanity back, the first few weeks were hard on her. 

"What makes today different than the other days, Mama? I don't want you to get your hopes up too much." Worrying so much about her, Kai broke down every so often feeling as if it was her own fault he was trapped, being somehow cursed.

"I feel it in my bones. Now be good and if I don't return tonight don't be upset, whatever it is keeping me there, i will come back. I'll always come back. I love you, Nobou and I love you, Rin." 

Kuma came over for much needed snuggles, he felt it to. Something was different about today. "I love you too, Kuma. You're in charge of the older pups."

"Mama, wait." Going over he hugged her. "Take a pack with you, just in case. It's not just about you." She nodded and kissed her son.

"I love you, Kai." Rin hugged her as if she would never see her again, breaking her heart a little but knowing it was what needed to be done.

Meeting Katsuo at the training grounds she dawned an armor of her own with a red cloak made of the fire rat, big enough to encase her in it completely. 

"You feel it too." He stood in his own armor waiting for her to begin.

Concentrating as she placed her hand on the Orb in the new bag she made, it was completely black, her eyes turned to match her bag with her markings beginning to glow. "Tsuihō gēto." 

She slashed downward as the gate opened, Katsuo picked her up and ran through before it closed behind them. "It worked! It worked!"

Placing her carefully down on her feet, seeing her smile for the first time in months wholly. "Let's find him and get out of here."

"You don't think he'll be upset, do you? About, you know." Taking her hand in his, he knew she was nervous about what his reaction would be.

"Not at all." Kissing her cheek as they began their trek onward to find him, hopefully quickly. The less time spent there, the better for them all.  
....

Sesshoumaru walked down into another cave system in the canyon coming to what looked familiar, somewhat. The last looked familiar too and he only found forty or so to kill, it was not even a challenge for him. 

Walking casually into a cavern full of well armed men. Not giving any much of a chance, using his energy whip to take out a good chunk before using his claws to finish the rest. His anger against them pushed him to feel their death come by his hands.

Looking around still feeling little satisfaction it was beginning to annoy him. At least he knew when she came for him, there would be very few left, only the cowards who hid from him. 

....

After a day of traveling it was wearing on her no matter how often they stopped for food and water from their packs. She needed to fully rest.

"Can we stop for some sleep? I'm beyond tired right now." Releasing her hand, he pulled her into his arms and sat on the warm ground. He smoothed her hair under the hood of her cloak as she closed her eyes.

"We won't be here too long, I promise we will get him and go back home." Kai nodded against his armored chest and fell into a deep sleep. It took so much out of her to do things lately.

She was awoken an hour or so later when he jumped up with her in his arms. He placed her down and behind him, that's when she saw a group of men headed their way.

"I smell a woman." Thick necked man came to stand in front of them, Katsuo drew his sword holding it beside him.

"She's mine, you cannot have her. Leave and your life will be spared." The man cackled as he looked back to the three men behind him.

"He thinks we will just leave a woman." The others joined in the laughter as Katsuo remained calm, keeping her behind him.

"Like I said, she's mine." Three attacked at once as he fought them off, hearing his large sword connect with theirs. It was an impressive sight, he jumped and twisted in the air coming behind them to cut one in half.

The fourth came toward her, she didn't hesitate as she slowly drew her sword keeping it from sight under her cloak. Watching him run towards her until she stabbed him through the belly when he got close enough, finishing with stabbing him through the heart several times, she giggled at the sight of his lifeless body. 

Katsuo glanced toward her at the sound. "I got the other guy. Need help?" Entirely too cherry for his taste, she was just like Sesshoumaru when it came to fighting. It was somewhat disturbing more so with her.

"Stay out of this. I can't bear to see you hurt." Kicking one guy in the chest further away from him, turning to the other and throwing a knife into his neck.

"Oh, fine." She went over and sat on a large bolder, yawning still tired from her entirely too short of a nap, blinking her black eyes slowly.

Feeling an arm around her shoulders pulling her behind the boulder, there was a fifth man that had been unseen. Reaching behind her she pulled out a dagger and stabbed behind her head, plunging it deep into his eye. He dropped his grasp on her as she swung her sword down into his neck, slicing through his chest. 

Laughing as she came back around to the other side, seeing Katsuo had finished off the last and was coming to meet her. Grabbing her to look her over, making sure she was unharmed.

"Ya know, I can see why you men like this so much." Grabbing her and holding her tightly against his chest, it was too close for comfort her fighting. None of this was acceptable to him.

"Next time run or call out for me." Placing her hands on his cheeks, she knew he was worried about her. How could he not after everything that had happened.

"You've trained me well. Have faith in me." Kissing his cheek as he held her closer. He could never see her like he did that day, lifeless in his arms bleeding heavily. 

"Come on." Taking her hand in his they began walking again. It may take them a week to find him, seeing how large the place was.

Hours of walking hey finally came to the large canyon they had been heading towards. She groaned just at looking how daunting it was. "I need to rest a bit before we go down that." Gesturing to all of the canyon, while sitting to dig in her pack.

"Are you alright?" She nodded as she drank some water and took out a little jerky. She was so hungry and missed her favorite foods. 

"Did you see that? That flash of green, over there." Pointing down into the canyon, he saw it too. Scooping her up and jumping down the ledges to come to see Sesshoumaru locked in battle with the king.

"Sesshoumaru." He glanced at them and returned his gaze to the King with a smirk on his face. He didn't expect her to come so quickly, only five days to master a sword was impressive by anyone's standards.

"I see my way out of this hell has arrived, she will be so devastated when I kill you." The king laughed striking again at Sesshoumaru with his sword. He jumped back, bringing distance between them.

Sending yoki wave barreling down towards while jumping up to send it again. With her here, he needed to end this and quickly. Watching as Katsuo placed her on her feet again and made sure she was still well covered while holding her close in his arms. Pleased he was taking precautions with her.

A blast caught the king's arm and ripped it to shreds making it useless. "I don't see why you're so angry. She will be well cared for by the man she obviously replaced you with." 

Within an instant he was at his throat, running him through with the sword, uncaring he had been cut across his arm by the King's own sword. "Die already, I am bored with you."

"It's been months for her, she was bound to have moved on." Months? It's been mere days not months, how could it be? 

Squeezing harder, he severed the man's head from his body with his claws. It was a nice challenge for him being here but it was time to leave and be with his pack.

Kai ran as fast as she could and hugged him when they met each other. "I'm sorry it took me so long."

"How long has it been for you?" Arms wrapped around her, she felt bulky with all the armor on and the orb in between them.

"Three months. Has it not been that long for you?" Looking up into his eyes, she realized it hadn't and hoped it wasn't longer for him.

"Five days." Only days? Oh Kami no, the pups. She needed to get back immediately to them.

"We have to get back, right away. We have been here for almost two. That's almost two months there." Standing up on her tiptoes she kissed his lips. She missed him so much, it had been far too long, five days or three months was too much either way.

Releasing him she stepped back as Katsuo came to stand beside Sesshoumaru. Repeating her actions as before, "Tsuihō gēto"

The gate opened, Katsuo grabbed her and ran with Sesshoumaru right beside him. It closed once again quickly behind them. 

"The pups, I'm sure they've gone crazy without us." Turning to Katsuo she kissed his cheek. "Thank you so much, for everything. You gave him back to me."

"Well, I couldn't very well let those pups be without their father. You all need him." He put his hand on Sesshoumaru shoulder, "Glad you're back. She's crazier without you." 

He laughed as they left towards the castle and disappeared inside. She began to run when they reached the long hallway, stopping halfway out of breath. "Are you alright?"

"Oh yeah, just a lot to carry." Opening the door to Nobou's room to find it empty, then Rin's which was also empty. 

"Take off the gear." Waving him off, she was on a mission and wasn't going to take the time.

Finally coming to the dining room and finding them eating the evening meal inside. "Mama!" Both in unison jumping up to embrace her and Rin going to hug her father after.

"I'm so so sorry. It's only been a about two days for me, five for him. Everything is okay." Feeling her son trembling in her arms, he thought she was dead.

"Don't leave me again." She laughed and pulled back to look into his dark violet eyes while she rubbed an ear.

"I'm pretty sure I'm about to not even be able to go to the market, so don't worry about it." He laughed and dried his moist eyes, knowing how protective Sesshoumaru was of her. 

"You two go, I know you have plenty to talk about. We will have plenty of time tomorrow together." Giving them each a hug and kiss again, she scooped up Kuma for loads of kisses before handing him to Rin. Wanting to stay longer but knew he was right, there was lots to discuss.

Walking to her room, she seemed uneasy and he wasn't sure why. Had she changed her mind about mating him or was it just because of how much time had passed she just felt a little distant? 

Kissing her fiercely needing her to know nothing had changed for him, too much was in the way with the armor. She dropped the pack and the Orb's bag from under the cloak, taking off her armor, staying hidden from him and stood looking up at him.

Pulling on the bow she had tied the cloak shut with, she seemed hesitant to let him. He continued anyway, slipping it off of her shoulders letting it fall to the floor.

Her heart was pounding, she couldn't look up at him, choosing to close her eyes, he was going to know. How couldn't he? Feeling his clawed hand trace over her swollen belly, it was her stomach not the orb he felt earlier. 

"You are carrying our pup." Unsure as to why she didn't look at him, did she feel uneasy of what his reaction would be? She opened her eyes staring down at his hands still holding her belly. Heart pounding trying to escape her chest, trying to breathe.

"I... we..." she laughed it was somehow hard to tell him. "I guess we only needed that one time. So, surprise." Touching her cheek, to have her look at him. 

"This is why you were uneasy." Her hands were trembling slightly, she wanted to be more brave about it, she nodded her head.

"Most men aren't too thrilled about unplanned pups. I mean, I know you probably would have liked for it to have happened after we were mated." He reached up and untied his armor, pulling it off of him and placing his two swords against the chest of drawers. 

"I am happy." A big smile came across her face as he guided her over to sit on her bedding. She laid down on her back worn out from her journey.

"I'm already huge. Normally it's six months for a human pregnancy to look like this. Botan said maybe twins but only can hear one heart beat so far." Twins, singlet, it didn't matter to her. Hell, could be five in there and she'd still be happy.

"You are tired." Taking her in his arms, rubbing her rounded belly not being able to keep his hands off of it.

"Hungry too. I'm always hungry though." Chuckling he moved to get up, she assumed to feed her. "Stay, we can eat later. I missed you so much."

"Next crescent moon we will have the ceremony." Things progressed much faster than he could have ever realized but it didn't change his plans at all.

"You're not wanting to just because of this, are you?" Pointing down to the very obvious reason why he may want to.

"I had planned to even before we were together that night." Smiling as she snuggled further into him, needing to feel closer to him.

"Just a quick nap. Then a bath, you have blood on you and it's unnerving to smell." Her eyes already closed, for once she felt she could sleep. Through the months it was rare she got more than a few hours and usually Katsuo had to come watch over her so she would. Kissing her temple, he would find out everything later needing to care for her now.

When she awoke it was already late at night. Taking her to the kitchen, not wishing to be apart from her. Starting to wander down into the cellar she started to laugh. "I forgot I can't see anything in the dark."

"What are you looking for?" Still holding her hand, she squeezed tighter as they descended down the stairs further. 

"Strawberries." He went to release her hand when they reached the bottom to retrieve her desired food. "Don't. The dark scares me."

Bringing her with him to the back where they were, and filling up a bowl for her. "When did you become afraid?" 

"I was trapped in that cave with no way out. It still haunts me and how you disappeared in the dark..." placing the bowl in her hands he picked her up, if he could, she would never be afraid of anything ever again.

"I will protect you." Resting her head on his chest to hear his heart, he was real and there again, needing to remind herself.

"I know. Just take me to the bathhouse I'll eat these there." He chuckled seeing her already starting to eat them, those berries weren't going to make it.

Bringing her to the bathhouse and letting her down back on her feet, she had already eaten them all by the time they had gotten there. Slowly taking her clothing off and setting them aside, going over to pick up her soaps and wash cloth. 

"What?" He was staring at her not doing anything, seemingly calling his attention to what he was supposed to be doing, he started to remove his own.

"Your body." She eyed him, he better what he says or she might strangle him no matter how much she loved him.

"It's your fault I look like this so if you don't like it, too bad." Slowly walking down the steps into the water, he noticed two small dots next to the line on her shoulder before she untied her hair and they were hidden.

"Your body pleases me." Coming from behind, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her neck, Kai leaned back into him. 

Sesshoumaru grabbed the soap and began to wash her, starting with her arms. Pulling her to sit on his thighs as he gently washed her swollen breasts. She pushed against him feeling his hardened cock against her back, moaning quietly, she wanted him.

Moving to her rounded stomach, appreciating there was life growing within, made from each of them. Dipping his hand lower, abandoning the wash cloth, placing gentle pressure as he rubbed the bundle of nerves between her legs.

Slipping her hand behind her to stroke him, he kissed her deeply slipping his tongue inside her mouth needing to taste her again. Releasing him as she held the kiss, turning around to rub herself against him.

She seemed eager and wanting, her kiss was passionate, drinking him in. The feel of her hands on his chest only pushed him further into his own need for her. Enjoying the feel of her nipple in his palm as he kneaded her breast. 

As he pulled away, placing her on the ledge, he took her nipple in his mouth as he held her close, rubbing his cock on her warmth between her legs. Her breathing was heavy, full of want and quickening.

"Take me, Sesshoumaru." Pushing himself inside her as she clung to his shoulders, a sharp intake of breath filled with pleasure coming from her. The sweet sound melted in his brain, trying to burn into his memory. 

Holding the small of her back as he slowly began to thrust inside her, his other hand along her jawline as he kissed her. Wrapping her long silky legs around his waist encouraging him further. Feeling her around him was blissful, never wanting her to let go.

Breaking the kiss to run his fangs across her neck as he continued to plunge himself into her faster. Small gasps coming from her, echoing off the walls enticing him further. 

"Harder." Obeying her wishes thrusting into her hard enough making her breasts bounce with the action, grazing her nipples against his chest. Kai nibbled on his earlobe as his thrusts became fast and hard feeling her release coming soon.

Placing her head against his shoulder quietly moaning as he continued to pleasure her with his cock. So deep his pelvis rubbed against her clit with every move, she didn't think she could hold on anymore but never wanted to let go. 

Two more thrusts with his luscious cock, she could no longer hold back, tensing before she spasmed around him. Feeling her orgasm around him, he released into her as he kissed her deeply.

"We should do baths together a lot more often." Laughing as he switched their places and sat on the ledge within the water, still buried deep inside of her.

"That can be arranged." Licking her underneath her ear, she smiled as she reached behind him she grabbed his soap and began to return the favor. 

Washing his chest first and arms noticing the cut across it that was still healing, frowning. "He cut you."

"It will be fully healed soon." Coming down to in between them, rising to release his cock from within her to wash it throughly. 

Kai dipped her hair in the water, leaning back as he caressed her breasts, they were too tempting to leave alone before soaping her hair, combing his claws through it. She made sure to wash his with her breasts teasing his face, noticing how much he enjoyed them.

"Well, I suppose I should get out." Going under the water to rinse her hair, swimming towards the steps.

"Where are you going?" Not intending to let her go anytime soon.

"I'll wait for you, just need to get out. I feel too warm and that could be bad for the pup." Finishing bathing and walking up the steps he was obviously irritated by the look on his face.

"Why did you come find me if you knew it was too hot for you there? You endangered our pup for me." Holy hell she should have kept her mouth shut, toweling off quickly as she could and pulling on a robe.

"I needed to find you. Katsuo had special clothes made for me from the fire rat. You have to trust I wouldn't do anything to harm our pup." She wanted to be angry with him for even thinking that of her but knew him too well, it was just who he was, extremely protective. Finding herself staring at him as he dried and pulled the robe around his body.

"You have also killed twice since carrying." Coming to place his hands on her hips looking down at her blue eyes, calmness over coming him. He knew she wouldn't do anything to harm the pup but often found herself in danger, making it difficult for him to be alright with her having gone.

"How did you know? Damnit, my shoulder. Are they stripes like the other one?" Clearly avoiding the question.

"Little human." His voice washed over, she loved when he called her that. He seemed only have a nickname for her and made her feel special.

"Katsuo was taking three men at a time and a fourth came after me, he didn't even touch me. The other was a bit more challenging. He came at me from behind after I had killed the first and grabbed my shoulders. I took my dagger out and stabbed his eye giving me enough distance to use my sword." Feeling his hands travel down her legs, she was in his arms again. "I am capable of walking."

"I will have to speak to Katsuo about your safety... again." Only pursing her lips while wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Not everybody is amazing as you are. Besides, I'm difficult to keep safe as is. Katsuo took good care of me there and while here. Now, do I have more stripes?" 

"Two dots next to the first. You will be more careful now." Only laughing, she couldn't even think of anything to say to that. Always having tried to be careful it just didn't seem to work out for her.

"I love your scent, it's my favorite out of everyone's. I doubt I'll ever get tired of it." Sesshoumaru placed her on her feet as she went over to gather her clothing.

"You have been burying your nose in people's necks." It seemed to him an odd hobby to take up, if not a little inappropriate.

"No, my sense of smell has skyrocketed. I can smell you all across the room. Botan said maybe it's because of the pregnancy but Kagome didn't have it, then again Inuyasha is a hanyo so that may be part of it." It seemed strange to him but if Botan wasn't worried then it was most likely nothing.

"Anything else new arise?" Admiring her beauty as she changed into a dark forest green nightgown. 

"My hearing is better too. No where near what yours is but it does rival Nobou's." Sadness seeped into her eyes as her face dropped a bit before recovering back into a smile.

"What is it?" The hearing she could do without, it only made her upset when she overheard people.

"I can hear the way people talk about me now. I see why Nobou hates the marketplace. They call me a whore, saying I've tricked you." She sighed, bending over to put on her panties. "It doesn't matter anyway. You're back now and that's all that matters."

No wonder she seemed hesitant to tell him she was pregnant. Months of overhearing what was said about it must have worn her down. Things were going to be different, he would make them accept her and their children.

Bringing her to his room, he changed as she stretched out on his futon before turning to her side. She looked so natural there, bathing in the moonlight, never wanting her to leave. 

Sesshoumaru laid behind her, taking in her scent as he placed a hand back on her belly. Kai grabbed it and moved it down lower, "he or she is kicking down here. Do you feel it?"

A small thump was felt under his fingertips, surely this had to be a dream. He never was meant to have any of this, his life was meant to be spent alone, fighting. Having a full pack and one that was expanding was beyond anything he could have ever imagine or have imagined wanting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tsuihō gēto Means banishment gate


	24. Mother

Chapter 24:

Stirring to find herself alone in Sesshoumaru's room, she began to panic thinking it had all been a dream. Did any of it happen at all?

Struggling to get up quickly, almost tripping over Kuma, Kai ran to the door sliding it open about to take off in a sprint as she was met with his chest in front of her face. Clutching him she tried not to cry, reassuring herself he was there.

"Why are you awake, my little human?" Running his claws through her hair trying to soothe her nerves as he held her close to him.

"I woke up and you weren't there. I thought... I thought it was only a dream I had you back." Taking her back over to the bed, making her lay back down. She didn't let go of him, she couldn't. 

"I chose to let you sleep while I tended to a few matters. It is nearly time for what you call lunch." Looking at him more closely she could see he was fully dressed and the room was bright, full of sun. 

"Sorry." Kissing her before he went to stand, she didn't want him to go. Feeling her child kick within her, mostly meaning it was time for more food, she rubbed her belly.

"Do not be sorry. I will return shortly." Sighing while she nodded, he could see she was hesitant to allow him to leave and it was understandable to him.

Returning to his original task, walking to her room to pull some fresh clothing for her with Jiro waiting for him. 

"I believe she likes the colors of this room. I wish for the new one to be similar in taste. Is it possible to have a private bathhouse lead off of it similar to the main one?" Jiro stood writing down his requests, a new room was being built off of the main hall for them. Usually it was customary to have such drastic measures taken to make sure the female felt properly at home once she was mated.

"I believe so if we move the room's entrance from facing the east to the west. We can connect it to the smaller hot spring to the right of the main bathhouse. It would require moving some of Rin's flowers though since it would need to use some of the garden's space." It would have to be thought over, he didn't wish for Rin to feel she was being forgotten.

"How much space?" Making sure to get the details before he spoke with his daughter himself over moving the flowers.

"Just over the wall, not much at all, it would ensure everything connected very well. Will the older pup's rooms be moved closer to the new one?" It was an overhaul for sure trying to make sure they were altogether still with the new room added on.

"Yes, though I wish for them to be separated by the new pup's room. They have made it clear they do not see each other as siblings much to my displeasure." Jiro chuckled, he knew exactly why too. He wouldn't care to have his own daughter under the same roof as a boy her age as they each began into adulthood.

"Shall I ask Kaiya for any of her input?" Sesshoumaru started towards the doors, he wanted to keep it hidden from her if he could or at least as long as it would allow him to.

"No, It is to be kept secret. Can it be completed by the crescent moon?" Jiro knew what he needed and whom he needed, to have it completed within the timeframe given.

"Yes. It should not take more than ten days, which is two less than needed." Both men left her room without her ever having known Jiro had been there.

Sesshoumaru waited until he saw him turn the corner before entering his own room with clothing for her in his hands. "I brought these for you to dress in." 

"Help me up, it's too hard." Chuckling as he went over to the woman who could barely get out of bed. "What's so funny?"

"You killed two men in this condition and yet have trouble getting off the futon." Laughing she could understand why that seemed so funny, taking off her nightgown and grabbing the light green inner kimono from him.

Pulling it around her and tying it closed, she grabbed the forest green outer one next. "It's not so much that I'm that huge already, which I am, it's my balance is even worse off now and I didn't have much to begin with." 

Coming behind her, he began to tie the gold obi above her growing stomach. Looking at her in the mirror in front of them, she looked radiant as ever. "What would you like to do today?"

She reached for the brush, beginning to comb through her hip length hair, starting to pull it up, grabbing a matching ribbon from the sleeve. He stopped her, he enjoyed seeing her with it down. "Spend all day with our pups. Maybe the garden or something, I don't really know."

"Come." Holding her hand, he took her down the hall to eat with Nobou and Rin with Kuma wobbling behind wagging his tail. He was an extremely happy little guy, more than usual.

Each were already sitting in their usual spots with Nobou sketching something for Rin as she directed him to something in particular. "You don't look anymore pregnant than you did before you left."

"It was only less than two days for me, Rin. What month and day is it?" Sesshoumaru helped her sit, she knew he was going to be protective but wasn't sure if he was being polite or ridiculously protective just yet.

"August twenty third. It has been forty two days since you left." Making her think it must have been about a day here for an hour there. It still seemed so odd, it must be for him having skipped almost five months.

"Were you two alright with both of us gone? Anything happen?" Noticing a giant pile of food suddenly appearing in her empty bowl, smiling at her Fluffy.

Rin began first of the things she had done and seen with her friends, Nobou and what had gone on at the haven. Making Kai sad she missed her last one being sent on to a new home. 

Soji was the first to be adopted out, to a family who looked just like him. They needed a strong heir and he seemed to fit perfectly with them. She was happy to see him smile and allowed him to take the female dog he had bonded so closely with.

Chiho was the next just a few weeks later. Kai almost didn't let her go, she had seen this baby grow into a toddler. It was hard to accept for her while being pregnant with her own but knew it was for the best.

Leaving Mika left, who was a lovely and sweet child. "I wish I could have seen her off."

Nobou and Rin smiled at each other, she then knew why she seemed so vague. It was someone they knew. "Aki took her in. They bonded over being water and water dragon youkai. It was shortly after you left she went home with her."

"Why didn't I think about that? I should have seen how perfect it was." Smiling big, removing any trace of sadness from her. 

"We will be mated on the third. A ceremony will be held in youkai and human traditions. Inuyasha and the others from his village have invitations on the way to them already. Is there anyone else any of you would care to invite?" Every time she thought she was making progress in the overfilled bowl, more food magically appeared, he was quick and sneaky.

"I would like Aki, Katsuo, Botan and Jiro to be there. I wanna be mean and say no Jaken but strangely he was really sweet to me when you were gone. So him too. Is there anyone for you that hasn't been mentioned?" Surely she was going to pop from all of this food but couldn't seem to stop, she was so hungry.

"What about InuKimi?" His daughter's sweet innocent voice saying his mother's name slightly unhinged him, such a name should not come from her.

"Sesshoumaru's mother? I suppose it is appropriate. Can't imagine she would be pleased with our growing pack though." Now the thought of upsetting his mother pleased him greatly, using his own to do it did not. 

"You have my permission to invite her. I was not born of a mated pair, if she is displeased it will be because you are human, which I care not how she feels on the matter." It would as well make him feel satisfied to have her see him be mated not to Miyoko as she intended.

"I'm fine with it. Just don't want it to be a large thing but of course, it's whatever you would like. I would love it if Rin made some flower arrangements for the ceremony though and maybe if Nobou would do the rest of the invitations? I think he has the best calligraphy I've ever seen and we have all enjoyed Rin's flowers and how beautiful she makes them." 

"We would love to." Smiling at his mother, he liked being involved anyway he could. Even more so with it being the ceremony to make her relationship with Sesshoumaru official.

"It is set then." She laughed, it had been already set before she even woke up. 

"I swear, if you keep putting food in my bowl I will pop." Seeing the sheepish look her son was giving as well, she figured it all out. "Kami, that's why it never seemed to go down. You both were trying to make me eat more."

"Mama, I've been doing it for months. I didn't anticipate he would as well." The beautiful sounds of laughter filling the room from her pack, she sure was in trouble for the next four months.

....

"I'm fine, I promise." Botan looked her over once more just to be sure. It was fascinating she hadn't grown one bit in the last two months. 

"I just would like to be sure. Do you have any complaints?" Tying her clothing back shut, Sesshoumaru helped her off the futon.

"The men in my pack seem to think I need to eat more. Sneaking food into my bowl." She snickered at the whole ordeal earlier, those two were unstoppable. 

"I do keep telling you to eat more." Huffing as Sesshoumaru tied her obi on her once again. 

"I constantly eat, it's ridiculous. The proof is in how giant I am already." Placing her hands on her hips, intending to keep these men from making her eat herself to death.

"You are not giant. Your belly is all child, keep that in mind." Maybe he had a point, though she wasn't about to tell him that.

"Anyway, thanks for checking me over. You know how he is, wouldn't hear of anything else." It was nice to have him there for the visit, he hadn't been able to be involved up until now.

"Of course, any pain or bleeding you let me know right away." Nodding as she left the room with a smile on her face, things were going very well.

Kuma came up to her after waiting outside for, to him, seemingly an eternity. Picking him up she wondered if he was full grown yet, still only half the size he should be. 

"You should not carry him." Rolling her eyes and she settled him in her arms.

"He is not heavy at all. Besides, he likes it. Don't you? Yes you do." Receiving wet kisses from her handsome little guy.

"Just come from Botan? Everything okay?" Katsuo came over to meet them in the hallway which she just realized, she had been slowly herded towards the kitchen. Holy hell, it had only been three hours since she ate, then again some oranges did sound good.

"Everything is great. Sesshoumaru just wanted me to have a check up." Petting the little furry thing in her arms before he smiled at her.

"As you should. It was a struggle the entire time to get her to take care of herself. Don't leave me with her alone again, I'm not sure I can survive her." Not having to turn around to even see the displeasure across his face, making sure to try to set Katsuo on fire with her stare.

"I was not that bad." Wishing she couldn't see his eye brow raise, making her statement even less believable.

"We had put herbs in everything she ate for the first week, just to get her to sleep. All she did was swing that damn sword and fight anyone who tried to stop her. Don't give me that innocent face. She thought I was trying to lie to her about the pup just to get her to calm down a bit." Why the hell wont he just shut up already? Was he trying to make sure she wouldn't ever be able to leave her room again?

"Who the hell is going to believe they're pregnant after five days just because of the taste of their skin is a little different? It's absurd. Humans don't figure that out until weeks later, not my fault." If she was going down, it was swinging and taking him down with her if she could figure out a way.

"Little human." Wincing at the tone of his voice, Kai turned to look up at him putting on big puppy dog eyes.

"I promise I'll be good from now on to the best of my ability." Narrowing her eyes at Katsuo when she heard him snicker, turning back with puppy dog eyes again.

"You will make sure to care for yourself." She had tried to once she realized Katsuo wasn't lying to her, it was just hard when she had lost so much already. Seemingly to have history repeat itself, she had just lost her self completely, struggling to keep going.

"Yes, I will. I finally have you back, it won't be so hard to anymore." Knowing she was sincere hearing her voice drop her playful tone, he couldn't have realized it would have been that hard for her. 

"Katsuo really did take good care of me, us." Dropping her hand to rub her belly feeling the little one kicking inside her, probably from all the voices. They seemed to be sensitive to sound already.

"Does that mean you'll name him after me? Hell, if it's a girl you still could." Laughing as he saw the thoughts running through her head of a little girl Katsuo just to spite him.

"Well, I suppose so. I just don't see how Prince Ass is a suitable name for a baby." Laughing as he rubbed her belly.

"Well, I better grab Botan. Archery, not one of our best days. Got a guy stuck to a tree with an arrow through his leg." Bounding off to where they had just left having forgotten his original task at hand.

"We are not naming the pup after him." Putting Kuma down as they began again toward the kitchen.

"Of course not, I haven't even thought of names yet." Taking his hand, still feeling she needed reassurance he was real.

"We have time. What good would you like?" Entering the kitchen, he released her hand to go fetch her whatever pleased her at the moment.

"Oranges." Slightly defeated tone, though feeling special with the extra attention she was receiving.

"You need meat." Popping up from the cellar with two large ones in a bowl just for her, she smiled.

"I'll eat some this evening, promise. Maybe." Standing on her toes to give what was supposed to be an innocent kiss, turned passionate.

Wrapping one arm around his shoulder, pulling him closer. He tasted refreshing, of cool spring water, she wanted to drink in his very essence. 

"I hear, she's actually some kind of witch that enchanted him to gain power. Why else would he choose a common mortal?" One of the castle workers brining in a basket of fresh picked vegetables.

"He seems to like human girls. Probably just took her for pleasure and she got pregnant. That's why he's been away for so long, can't stand to see mistake. Probably will kill it once it's born. You know the only reason she's still alive after getting pregnant is she's the Miko of Souls." Coming into the kitchen the two women looked shocked to see them standing there.

Kai stared at the floor and began to silently leave, not caring to engage with gossiping women. Just best to leave things as they were, it hurt to hear such things but didn't matter what was said.

"You will have respect for my Miko. It will not be tolerated spreading lies. Let it be known, anyone from hence forth caught engaging in such things will not survive my wrath." Looking at the two women who bowed down low begging for forgiveness, his face was hard and vengeful. Things had been let go for far too long and would be rectified.

"Yes my Lord." In unison, not looking up to see him leave, only listening for his footsteps moving further away. 

Suddenly feeling herself being raised into his arms, nothing else mattered. "One day I might be too heavy for you to carry me."

"You will not allow anyone to speak about you in such a way." Commanding and a seriousness she knew he didn't like hearing that as much as she did.

"I just don't want to cause any trouble. Sometimes it's best to let the waves wash over you than fight them." Setting her down in the garden with the older pups within sight.

"Too many waves will drown you." Damn him, why did he have to be so wise? Kissing him before going and joining them, a promise to stand up for herself in the future.

....

Three days until the ceremony and things seemed somewhat hectic to her. Really, she didn't want anything to be a big deal, no matter what she tried, it was going to be.

"Mother is here." If she ever thought he could have sounded less enthusiastic than normal, she was wrong. Taking her to the entry to greet his mother, Kai's arm wrapped around his. 

"I am surprised I was invited here. Maybe your odd fascination with humans is a positive thing." Making Kai wonder what was going on, she seemed pleasant enough. "You must be Kaiya, which I clearly see there are other announcements to be made still." 

"Uh, yes. I suppose there is. It's a pleasure to meet you, InuKimi." Hearing a nearly inaudible sigh, she looked up to Sesshoumaru, he didn't care to have her here at all.

"Oh, Sesshoumaru. I'm being nice, relax a little bit. I swear he was born tighter than a bow string." Kai giggled, having heard the stories from Katsuo, she was sure he had been.

"I'm sure he was. Come, meet Nobou and see Rin." Taking her to the garden where the two were sitting and enjoying the afternoon.

"This is my son, Nobou and I'm sure you remember Rin." Rin smiled big, happy to see her grandmother. She had enjoyed her company before even though she teased about being food.

"Son? He looks just a few years younger than you, I didn't realize humans could breed so early in their life." Looking over to her son, "I see even if this one is a girl we will have a half breed for an heir to the west... if you mate her."

"Mama adopted me, I won't be an heir to the west." He would need to be adopted by Sesshoumaru to ever be heir, it wasn't what he wanted anyway nor would it be accepted. A hanyou and not by blood, it wasn't worth any fight if he wanted it.

"I will mate her and Nobou will be my heir." Already had decided when he chose to mate her, Nobou would be a strong man once he had matured and was fully trained. Never having cared much for even having an heir in the first place, the only requirement for the youkai was for it to be male. He had no intentions of dying therefore never needed one.

"Hanyou is the preferred word for a half human. Best to get used to it too, humans and hanyou are part of your family now." Deadly smile on her lips, saying the things her words didn't. 

"I believe I will grow to like you, Kaiya." Laughing fully, the woman had spunk and would stand up to anyone, InuKimi respected her for it.

"I'm glad we understand each other. Now, would you like to speak with Inu no Taisho?" The afternoon was mostly uneventful, she could see why he wasn't excited about his mother coming. Seemingly nice with undercuts making it known she wasn't pleased with much of anything he did, the most powerful youkai there was and he still managed to disappoint her.

InuKimi behaved herself through the evening meal, making Kai believe she wasn't going to be much trouble. The three sat drinking tea before retiring for the night, for Sesshoumaru it couldn't come soon enough. He would have already left if it wasn't for he thought of leaving Kai alone with his mother.

"Are you mating her because she is pregnant? Really, you do not have to just because of a simple mistake." Taking Kai's hand in his own, she squeezed tightly as he saw her jaw was clenched tight.

"Our pup is not a mistake." A small huff before she sipped her tea.

"If you really want to be with the human, she can be your courtesan while you mate Miyoko." That's it, she was going to kill the old hag with her bare hands.

"Look, I get it. You think humans are beneath you. That's your problem, not ours. If you don't approve and are going to cause trouble, then leave. I thought you would like to be here for your son and grandpups but I won't stand to have our pack insulted by you." Watching as she placed her hand over her heart, pretending to be hurt by her words. Kai knew better by now, it didn't take her long to figure out she didn't want her as a daughter in law.

"I have never been spoken to in such a rude manner before and by a human no less. Perhaps humans cannot handle pregnancy as well as a youkai can. I was only making conversation." There was no use in even trying anymore with the ridiculousness the woman spewed, always trying to make herself seem the better person.

"Whatever you need to tell yourself." Standing as she let go of his hand, looking down at him. "I'm tired and going to bed. I'm at my limit for bullshit for today." 

"I will be in shortly after I have spoken with my mother." Kai left to go bathe before lying down, the scents of her bath oils could calm her enough to sleep, hopefully.

"Now that she's gone, tell me what you really are doing with her." Leaving him to wonder what was wrong with his mother that she couldn't see how wonderful Kai was.

"She is the one I have chosen. There will be no more speak of Miyoko or insulting her." He didn't care to hear what she had to say in response, nor did he care. If she didn't stop with her disrespect of his pack, she would be made to leave and have no further contact with any of them.

....

Things seemed to go as smoothly as they could with her around, though often Kai found herself holding her tongue as to not further escalate things with her. The ceremony was tonight and everyone was bustling around to make sure things were ready.

"Kagome, I'm so glad you are all here. Let me see this little guy." Taking Noaji from her hip and giving him a good snuggle.

"I think he missed you. Already crawling around everywhere now, even learned to say mama." Going over to give the other two big hugs after handing the little one back to his mother.

"They've all gotten so big. Thank you for coming all the way out here, it means a lot to me." Going over to Inuyasha, she had to thank him for so much. Katsuo had dragged her out there to get Nobou and Rin, she was in a bad place losing her sanity and it was Inuyasha who had gotten through to her the most by saying he understood and really understanding.

"Looks like you swallowed a small goat." Laughing as she hugged his neck, the baby kicking his stomach as if to say 'I'm not a goat'.

"It sometimes feels like it with how much the baby kicks me. Come on, let's get you all settled." Showing them to the room next to Rin's for them all to relax and refresh after the long journey.

"We would have been here two days ago but I had to save another defenseless village." He seemed so much like his father to her, enjoying being a protector of not only his village but the neighboring ones. He and Miroku wouldn't even charge them for it either, usually they would end up with gifts during harvest time of food or clothing showing up randomly at their doorsteps. 

"You're becoming rather popular in the East, maybe you should think about taking it over and becoming lord there." Opening the doors to their room, hearing him 'keh' at her remark.

"That's the bastard's thing, not mine. I don't want to be a lord over anyone." Kagome took the pups inside which it looked to be nap time with how sleepy they all looked. 

"Bastard!" Ears pinned back as he looked behind him to see his little girl smiling proudly at learning a big new word.

"Sachi, we don't say bastard." Only making her say it several more times with a very cross Kagome behind her.

"Inuyasha I have told you about your mouth." Making a hasty exit to let the parents sort that one out before she burst out laughing at the adorable little one saying such a dirty word.

Heading out to the training grounds to see what Katsuo was doing. Sesshoumaru said he had things to attend to, Nobou was off with Rin doing something they wouldn't tell her about leaving her to herself or to keep company with his mother. 

"You lost my princess?" Rolling her eyes at him as she walked closer.

"No, I'm bored. Kagome and Inuyasha are resting for a while and I'm all alone until this evening. What are you doing?" Watching him replace the swords back into the stand hoping he was finished for the day, even though it was barely afternoon.

"I'm about to go to the archery range with Makio." Picking his kimono off the rack and putting it back on, tucking it into his hamaka after tying it shut.

"Can I go? I have nothing to do at all, Sesshoumaru made sure of that." Little pout on with big eyes, knowing he couldn't say no to her.

"Alright. You have to stay back and sit in the shade." Rewarded with a big smile from her, happy to be getting what she wanted. "And let me know if you need to go inside or get hungry."

"You're just as bad as he is." Grabbing her hand and wrapping her arm around his, he worried about her tripping over the ground on the way.

"If he ever doesn't treat you the way he should, I will gladly take his place." The words seemed light and teasing, his tone betrayed him sounding more serious. 

"You'll find someone to be with where you won't have to take anyone's place." They were completely wrong for each other, she had known that from the start. Still she could see how he looked at her occasionally, breaking her heart she couldn't make him stop feeling that way toward her. 

"Nobody will ever be you." Maybe it was a mistake to come and see him, he hadn't once talked like this to her since she became involved with Sesshoumaru. Knowing it had to be because in a few hours her life would be bound to another's.

"I've never been what you needed in a mate but will always be what you need in a friend. Once you meet her, you'll understand." He wanted to believe her, to feel he was going to get over his feelings for her but knew he never would.

"You're probably right." Helping her get settled underneath a large oak tree behind the archers, she was still able to see all of it. "Remember our deal. You don't even have to get up, just call out for me." 

"Always." Smiling seeing his green eyes sparkle again, knowing he would always be there for her whether she needed him to be or not, he was her best friend other than the one she was mating.


	25. The unexpected

CHAPTER 25: the unexpected

"Are you sure that pup is yours? Look at how close she is with Katsuo. She even looks more pregnant than she should." Having his mother bother him in his study was one thing, her accusing Kai of deceit was another.

"I will kill you where you stand if you continue to spread lies." Irritating laughter rang from her, as she waved her hand dismissing him.

"I'm only joking, Sesshoumaru. Really, have a sense of humor." Escaping the study, feeling she pushed him too far into anger, none into doubt like she had hoped.

Going to the training grounds to find Katsuo, wondering if she could sway him to run away with her, having heard his conversation with her earlier in the day. She seemed to have rejected his feelings, the way they talked however were dancing around saying anything at all.

"Hello, Katsuo. My you are looking strong today." Finishing sparring with one of the soldiers before coming to talk with her.

"InuKimi. What can I do for you?" Devious smile made him feel on guard, almost as if she would attack at any moment.

"I just came to have a little chat is all. What exactly is your relationship with my son's intended?" Friendly smile dropping off his face altogether, seeing she was up to something.

"We are friends." Crossing his arms in front of his bare chest, making it known he was not pleased with her inquiry.

"I hear you are much more than that. Is the pup yours? You seemed have slept in her room often when Sesshoumaru was gone." Now he was angry, staring her down through he delighted tone.

"We have not been intimate. I slept in her room to look over her, she was distraught when your son was trapped in that hell. I took care of my friend, nothing more." False laughter coming from her, igniting his anger further.

"Are you sure? Seems to me you are in love with her. Perhaps she loves you too, spends an awful amount of time with you not to be." Smoothing her mokomoko, she sighed. "I am sure you two have talked about your feelings for each other at some point. Otherwise it would seem ridiculous she was mating Sesshoumaru if you had not."

Grabbing his sword to go spar with the next man, feeling conflicted inside. Needing to hear her rejection of him from her own mouth with direct words. Not like earlier in the day, needing to be sure. 

Sun setting everyone joined together for a reception before the ceremony which began when the moon hung high in the sky above them. Dressed in a simple kimono of lavender and dark purple flowers, she didn't feel nervous like she thought she would.

"Mama, Rin and I worked on something for you. It is incomplete but you'll see why." Bringing in a large painting and turning it so she could see. Instantly making her tear up, trying not to cry.

"It's perfect. Thank you both so very much." It was of her pack, painted to look as if they stood together with a little baby unfinished in her arms. 

"Rin helped figure it out, it was her idea actually." Each came over to hug her so she didn't have to struggle upward towards them. 

"You each did well, thank you." Nobou smiled at the compliment from Sesshoumaru, he strived for his approval.

Leaving the rest of the gifts to be given and left unopened as was the customs of their time. She wondered when she had started to think of this era as her time, guessing it had to be when she realized she had a family here. No longer alone.

It was a joyous occasion, even his mother participated while behaving herself. All of her children were there expect Soji and Chiho, it was a little bittersweet for them not to be. 

Soon it was time for the ceremony, one that was blended to have each side of them. Kagome helped her dress into her elaborate gown, which to Sesshoumaru's instance was white with light pink cherry blossoms coming over the left shoulder and down the sleeve, falling into petals at the bottom. 

"Sango truly wanted to be here, Kaede too." Pulling the outer kimono shut and tying it.

"Any day now and we will have another little one. I'd rather them stay home than risk coming. Besides I know how hard it would be to travel while being that pregnant." Really she felt like she was smuggling a cantaloupe in her belly, a really big one.

"Are you nervous?" Having a thin obi go over the top of her round belly, Kagome tying into a beautiful knot behind her.

"Actually, no. More relieved I think. I never thought I'd be here again, yet here I am and with more family than I ever could have imagined." Kagome came around to embrace her, happy she had come into her life. 

"I'm glad." Each with an excited smile.

The doors opened to have Katsuo walk in. He wondered how she could have possibly looked anymore radiant. "You can always change your mind, run off with me instead." 

"I bet you say that twice a week to other women." Giggling and relieved his playful tone was back.

"I'm going to make sure the pups are still dressed." Leaving them for a bit of privacy and really needing to make sure Sachi wasn't trying to escape her formal kimono again, she hated wearing it.

"I haven't seen any woman in months." Brushing her hair one more time, turning from him to look in the mirror.

"Most likely because you've been taking care of me." With her everyday and night while Sesshoumaru was gone, trying to keep her safe. Trying to bring her back from the dark place she was drawn into in her mind. 

"If this is what it feels like to love someone, I don't think I care to do it again." Looking at him through the mirror wishing his he hadn't said anything at all. "Is he truly the one you chose. Tell me so I can get over this."

Wanting to capture her, to take her away from everything to keep her to himself. He kept his distance, already having said too much. Sesshoumaru was nearly his brother, he loved him. Leaving Katsuo to feel even worse about it all, why did she have to come into their lives? Why didn't she come sooner?

"I love him, Katsuo. I appreciate everything you have ever done for me and your friendship. I don't love you lin the same way I love him." Afraid she would lose him because of it all, knowing it was for the best if he couldn't move on.

"I'm glad it was him instead of anyone else. He can protect you and needs you. I apologize for saying anything, I just needed to hear what I already knew. Forgive me." Turning to look into his melancholy eyes, feeling his heart breaking as if it were her own.

"There's nothing to forgive." Hugging him as if it were the last she would ever receive from him.

"I won't ever bring it up again." His word was his life when it came to her, even if he never stopped loving her, he wouldn't cross the boundaries again. After tonight she was Sesshoumaru's in every way possible.

"Walk me out?" Smiling as he offered his arm to her, taking her to the garden she loved so much. To mate the one she was truly meant to be with.

The pond was lit by floating candles, small lanterns darted everywhere around the garden providing a warmth and enchantment, everyone sat while Sesshoumaru stood at the other side waiting for her, Katsuo let her go in every way he could and joining the small crowd.

Looking up before she began to go to him seeing the millions of stars with a dozen shooting stars streaking across the sky. A meteor shower starting, there wasn't anything that could make it more beautiful than it was. Making her way to her Fluffy, standing to his right, taking her hands in his.

Botan came to them with a small dagger, Sesshoumaru offered his left hand. Cutting across his palm, as Kai offered her right one and Botan did the same to hers. Lifting his hand up showing her his palm, she repeated the action as they joined their bleeding hands, lacing their fingers together.

Hands still joined as they each took three sips from what should have been sake, as was human tradition, instead warm tea.

"My life belongs to you. My heart belongs to you. My soul belongs to you." Spoken in unison looking into each other's eyes, the feeling of something powerful washing over her.

A white glow formed around their hands and encompassed their entire bodies, bonding their souls to each other. He released her hand, taking a damp cloth from Nobou, to wipe away the blood and reveal her fully healed hand, as if it were never cut. Taking it from him to wipe away the blood on his, seeing the same. 

Sweeping her off her feet to take her to their new room, which she only had asked about when a set of doors suddenly appeared at an otherwise closed hallway that had been extended mysteriously. Only telling her it was something for after the ceremony and to quit trying to sneak into it.

Putting her down to allow her to see their room, she hadn't stopped smiling the entire way. Sliding the doors open to see the room lit up by lanterns, beautiful and cozy. The futon was overly large with a cream cover adorned with a snowy scene stitched on top of it, her lavender blanket she had made laying across the bottom.

The chests were dark colored, flowers carved impeccably into the wood, a full length mirror on top of the low vanity with small bottles of oils and her their brushes. Her small wooden boxes laid on the larger chest. Going over to touch the one that held the things most precious of hers. 

"I've always loved this box. I think mostly because you gave it to me just as much as what it holds." Leaving it unopened as she looked more around the room. 

"I made it for you while you slept. I could not sleep myself, using the time to give you something you needed." Seemingly finding ways to surprise her even after a year being with him, somehow making things feel even more right knowing his feelings went back further then she thought. 

"Now it's even more special to me." Picking up one of the soft pillows from the sitting area next to the low table she assumed would be for their nightly tea.

"Do you like our room?" Replacing the pillow she went and wrapped her arms around his neck, nodding while biting her lip knowing what was to come next. "There is more."

Taking her hand to show her the doors behind the folding screen, opening them to show her a small hot spring enclosed like the other, the size of a large tub. 

"Oh wow. Thank you for doing all of this." Kissing him as if her life depended on his lips for air to breathe. 

Picking her up to carry her over to their bedding, she couldn't help but giggle, he really liked to carry her everywhere. Truly she landed her knight in shining armor and he was hers forever.

Placing her down to sit as she reached behind her to untie her obi, kissing her neck making her want to surrender to him for any wish he had of her. Entirely too slow for her taste, he untied all of her ties leaving her kimono draped on her shoulders as she tugged harder at his stupidly fancy obi to no avail.

"Patience my little human." Gently pushing her to lay down as he untied it himself and removed his top smiling as she playfully pouted back at him. 

"It's been twice ever, I've run out of patience." Wrapping her arms around his strong shoulders as he laid on top of her, giving her no weight to bear on her stomach, settling his hips between her bare open legs. 

"We have plenty of time." Taking her nipple in his mouth, flicking it with his tongue. 

"No, we have three and half months until the baby is born. Then it's six weeks of nothing." Fairly certain he was trying to torture her as he rubbed his hips against hers. 

"Six weeks is not long." Moving to her other breast massaging the other with his hand.

"Maybe for you." Her heart was beating faster, she needed more and he was withholding.

"I would not know in these matters." Kissing down her belly to the warmth between her legs with anticipation of the taste only she could give him.

Long slow lick across her wetness, making her breathing quicken, soft moan escaping her. Continuing to caress her with his tongue, tasting every bit of her. 

"What... you... Kami can you stop so I can gather my thoughts?" Sucking on her bundle of nerves making her gasp with pleasure, slipping two fingers inside her, slowly moving them in and out, her mind was nearly gone. "Oh holy hell."

Moving his fingers faster as he used his mouth to pleasure his mate, she moved her hips against him making him desire her even more. To bury himself deep within her, take her in every way possible. It wasn't long before he felt her quiver around him, giving a few small light licks before climbing back between her heavenly legs.

"You were saying." That's right, she was trying to figure out if she was mad at him or not.

"You mean to tell me you've never gone six weeks without sex?" Wondering why she looked so mad, beginning to run his fangs across her neck.

"I have not." Pushing his shoulders to look at him, hoping he was giving some lame joke, it hurt to see his sincerity.

"This whole time you've been with someone else? You didn't think to ever mention that?" Even more by his chuckle as if it was absolutely nothing at all to even think about.

"I have only been with you." Chills ran down her spine realizing he really had never been interested in anyone enough to go further, he could have had anyone, choosing her.

"I love you, Sesshoumaru." Tenderly kissing her, satisfied in knowing she was wholly his and he would kill anyone who dared to think otherwise.

Her hands travelled down his chest to untie his hamaka, slipping her hand inside around his hard cock starting to slowly stroke him, rubbing her thumb over his head. He was completely done waiting as he felt her soft hand explore him. Pulling off the rest of his clothing, kissing her fiercely as he plunged himself into her abyss.

Kai wrapped her legs around his waist using them to drive him faster, every fiber of her being felt invigorated by his touch. Pushing her hips against his, searching frantically for more that only he could give her. When his mouth reached her neck again she felt the pull to the edge of release. 

Her soft sighs and gasps drove him faster aching to reach deeper within her, feeling the very center of within her with every thrust he made. The moment she arced her back, taking even more of him inside her, he felt her release and followed her tumbling into bliss.

Opening her eyes to see the beautiful golden ones, she smiled at him. Never would she have thought someone so distant would be the one who stole her heart, happiness would never do what she felt justice but it was only word that came to mind. 

"Six weeks seems longer than it did before." Hearing her laugh while he laid on his back, gathering her in his arms. 

"You'll survive." Laying her head on his chest, holding him close to her. "How are you so good at all of that?"

"I am diayoukai." She snorted, that was his answer for everything. "I listen to your heart beat, to the responses your body has to my touch." 

"You're a very good listener." Drifting off for a little nap before more activities "I'm glad you saved me." 

Kissing the top of her head, feeling her delicate skin against his, she saved him too from a life of loneliness and boredom. He felt more alive with her, truly felt happy even when she wasn't right next to him. Just knowing she was in his life made everything so much better, without her he would have never known what he was missing.

 

....

 

A month went by as everyone settled into their own routine. Kai was beginning to feel miserable, pretty positive the child within her was going to come out over ten pounds, looking as if she was going to pop any day. If there wasn't a twin hiding in there, she was never having another baby. Ever.

"What are you making?" Sitting in the seating area with thick rope adding soft yarn crocheted around it. 

"A basket for the pup to sleep in. It's so weird, I feel if it's just one little boy in me but my stomach says otherwise. Two months, one week and two days more of this. If I'm not late." 

Sitting next to her, giving a sweet kiss as he held her cheek looking into her enchanting eyes. "Have you eaten?" 

"Not yet. I was trying to finish getting this crocheted before I did." Only having about two more feet left to cover in the thick forest green yarn.

"I will have it brought in here." She opened her mouth as to speak before closing it. "With some strawberries." Finding her sheepish smile endearing, kissing her again before leaving to inform Jiro of the change. 

Meeting him right outside the doors, Jiro was excellent at knowing what was needed and where. Allowing him to bring it in as she quickly flopped everything off the table onto the floor in somewhat of a mess.

"You look wonderful today, Kaiya." Big smile across her face. "Do you need anything?"

"Thank you. I don't think I do, you're always so great at knowing before even I do of what I need." Spotting the giant bowl of strawberries, grabbing it first as Jiro left them to themselves.

"You need meat." Whining as he took her bowl from her and gave her one filled with roasted duck and pork.

"I don't want meat, I want strawberries." Using her fingers to eat some. "See? I ate some, now gimme." 

Holding it just out of her reach, he was playing dirty. "Eat all of the meat." 

Fine, if that's how it was going to be, she had her own tricks. Struggling to try to get up on her knees to do teasing of her own, she miserably failed. No way in hell she could be any sort of sexy enough to get them. Tears welled up in her eyes, suddenly feeling like a bloated whale and less like a newly wed.

Watching as tears began to fall down from her sad eyes as she slowly ate in defeat. The game was no longer fun anymore, giving her what she desired she sniffled as they fell faster down her cheeks. 

"What is wrong?" Now she was an embarrassed bloated whale who couldn't control herself.

"I don't see how you can be attracted to me anymore. I'm huge, have to pee every hour and can't seem to control my emotions anymore." Sesshoumaru had noticed she was more emotional than usual in the last week and her stomach had nearly doubled in size since mating, none of it mattered to him when it came to attraction.

"You are carrying our pup. It is normal to have these emotions. However, I believe I have proven you wrong many times. I am very attracted to you." Kissing her neck her tears began to stop. "This morning was one of those times." 

"I'm sorry. I feel like such a mess." Pulling back to look at his beautiful mate, he would never find her anything less than perfect. 

"Do not apologize. I love you my little human." Wiping away any trace of sadness, tenderly kissing her lips. 

"I love you, too." Eating half of her meat before going back to her delectable little red berries. As he filled her in on his day at her request, she mostly liked hearing his voice as did the baby.

"Take a nap. I will return this evening." Kissing her one more time, not only for his own pleasure, to reassure her as well from her earlier insecurities.

"Yes Lord Fluffy." Well, maybe after she finished getting what she needed done so she could make a nice baby basket after she woke up. He didn't need to know that though.

....

Waking up to a sharp pain in her stomach, it felt horrid as her entire stomach tightened. Braxton hicks contractions most likely, just practice for the real thing. Making her dread even more a labor without pain medication.

Trying to go back to sleep, unable to with the serious urgency to pee. Getting up to go handle herself and returning to try to salvage her nap. Giving up as she felt another false contraction, bringing her work to the bedding and beginning to crochet and mold it into a nice basket.

Halfway through she felt a third and was beginning to wonder if she should be worried. Three within about an hour seemed excessive to her, wishing Rin and Nobou hadn't left five days ago for a visit with Inuyasha and Kagome to see Sango's new baby girl.

Choosing to believe everything was just fine and could wait until Sesshoumaru returned, she began back to her work. It shouldn't be too long before he came back, right? 

Finishing her work she had counted while stitching it together not great at keeping time but seemed one was happening every twenty minutes. Finally deciding something was wrong, walking out into the hallway towards Botan's where he most likely would be. 

Bracing herself against the wall as another one hit her, they were getting more painful. Grateful when she felt strong arms brace under hers to hold her up.

"Are you okay?" Looking up to see green eyes in near panic staring at her, having seen him considerably less in the last month.

"No. I think the baby is coming early. It's way too early. We don't have the medical care here like we do in my time." Picking her up, he took her back to her room, laying her down. 

"I'll go get Botan. Stay here." Heading back out towards the doors, hoping it wasn't what she had thought.

"I don't think I can go anywhere." Laughing at her poor attempt at finding him herself. Wishing he didn't leave, she felt alone, scared for her child's life.

It wasn't long before Botan came into her room and kneeled down beside her. "What seems to be going on? Katsuo said you were in pain."

"I think I'm having contractions and they're getting closer together. More painful too." Feeling her for a fever, moving to feel her stomach as another one came. He could feel her stomach contract, hardening underneath his hands. 

"Kai, you will have the pup tonight." His worried face betrayed his calm tone. Feeling herself falling down into a pit of despair as reality hit her.

"No." Breathing faster trying to hold back the tears.

"We don't have a choice, sweet child. Nature has decided." Doors sliding back open with Sesshoumaru and Katsuo coming to her bedside.

"No. It's too early. He won't survive. No, damnit! Fix me, please fix me. I can't, I just can't." Sesshoumaru took her left hand inside both of his as Katsuo took her right, rubbing her arm trying to soothe her.

"I need you to calm your breathing. Let me have a look and see what's happening." Clipping two claws, he lifted her kimono to feel inside her. His face turned hard, as he replaced her clothing wiping his hands on a damp cloth, she knew.

"It won't be long." Losing all control she crumbled, Katsuo let her hand go allowing her mate to hold her. 

It was hard for all of them to hear her sobs and pleas to any, every Kami she could think of to not take her baby away from her. Refusing any sort of herbs to calm herself, saying it would affect the baby, knowing better than to take anything from them they offered of food or drink as the hours crawled by.

Five minutes apart, her water broke leaving her with no hope left it would all go away. The pain was immense, she welcomed it as her penance for failing her child. Never making a sound after her sobbing stopped, only silent tears, deep breaths.

Checking her again after seeing her refusing to push, the head was crowning. "It's time, you have to push." 

Sesshoumaru lifted her to a squatting position as her held her from behind wrapping his arms around her, needing to take all the pain away as he fought against his own. Katsuo held her hand, his heart broke for her.

Eerily quiet as she pushed the child further towards nearly certain death, wishing she had anything to bargain for the baby's life.

"You need to push and hard, do it. Do it now!" He sounded alarmed and calmer all at once. She felt the baby finally release from her body, afraid to look down, closing her eyes.

"Kai." Katsuo sounded confused, calm. 

Feeling the tiny little one thrust on her chest after being laid back with Sesshoumaru still holding her. "My mate, look." 

Hearing a tiny cry, she slowly opened them to see a perfect tiny child in her arms. He was full term and perfect. White hair just like his father, dark golden eyes staring up at her. 

"I don't understand but I don't care to either." Seeing a clawed hand rub the cheek of their son, she couldn't believe any of it.

"He's a healthy boy. I don't have any answers for you. I'm so glad this went much differently than we all expected."

Never taking her eyes off her son, his pointed ears stuck to the side of his head, two dark purple dots adorned each cheek. Their son was full youkai with a little mokomoko grasped in his hands, attached like a tail.

Chuckling to herself as tears fell, flooded with relief. "Thank you to whoever made this possible and thank you all for being here with me." 

"I have the afterbirth, you require no stitches. I will come and check on you in a few hours." Opening her kimono for her, helping place the baby on her nipple making sure he began to suckle before he left them.

"I'm happy for you, both of you. If you're up to it, I'll come for a visit in a few days." Kissing her cheek, patting Sesshoumaru on the back who was still in a state of disbelief, leaving them to be.

"Will he always have a long tail?" Petting it while he suckled from her breast, it was soft and cream colored like his father's.

"It will come off when he is a few months old." Peeking over her shoulder looking down at him, it was a wonderful surprise.

"I didn't realize your fluffy was a part of you. I kinda thought it was like clothing." Feeling the rumble of his chest behind her as he chuckled, neither could take their eyes off of him.

Only looking up to hear the doors sliding open, Jiro came in with warm wet wash cloths as well as fresh linens for her bedding, no amount of towels under her probably saved the sheets.

"This is for you and the baby. Oh my, full youkai." Amazed he set everything down to come look closer at the small child in her arms, it was impossible.

"We are all as surprised as you are." It was amazing, the little one even had markings. His entire long life he had not once seen anything like this.

"Well, let's get everything cleaned up. Wash her first, then I will have you hold her as I change the bedding. Then we can wash the pup." Once everyone was cleaned, she felt so much better. Wrapping her newest son in a warm blanket after dressing him in his own teeny tiny kimono. 

"I will bring food in shortly. Giving birth must have made you hungry." Only nodding as she fell asleep holding their son as she was held by the one who gave him to her.


	26. Surprises

CHAPTER 26: surprises 

"How long have I been asleep?" Sitting up, feeling sore from just having given birth. Ice would be greatly appreciated for her now tender bits.

"Through the night." Seeing her alarmed face, "I put our son to your breast to feed whenever he woke." 

"You are amazing." Kissing his cheek, giving her son her finger. "Hey there little guy. Papa take care of you while I slept?" 

Giving his mama a little whine looking up at her. "Jiro just came to see if you were ready to eat. Should arrive soon."

"Good, I'm starving. What are we going to name him? We haven't even talked about names." Taking him as he was offered to her, bringing him to her chest to see if he was hungry. "Guess he is hungry too."

"Takeo." Slowly looking up at him, afraid she misheard him. "It is because of him I now have this pack, I have you." 

"It's perfect." Wincing as she tried to position herself more comfortably, it was worth any pain so she couldn't complain.

"I have Botan bring something for your pain." Shaking her head, he knew she would refuse anything, wanting to do something to ease her pain. Helping her straighten her clothing as the child fell asleep.

"I would love a bath, maybe it won't hurt so much." Laying newly named Takeo down, Sesshoumaru helped her up. "Stay with him, I'll be alright and you can hear me in there anyway."

Looking over them one more time with an indescribable feeling of happiness, grateful for everyone she had in her life. 

Bathing felt amazing, making her feel more relaxed and clean. Discomfort from her cramping as her body began to accept the changes once again, trying to return to normal. Really, it wasn't even half as bad as she would have thought. Still, if he knocked her up again before their son was two, she would strangle her sweet mate. Returning to their room dressed in her robe.

Somewhat missing disposable pads, numbing medications and other modern era things. Packing her panties with the folded cotton cloth knowing she would probably still ruin them anyway. Oddly embarrassed as she did it in front of him as she dressed in their room, it was after all half his fault she needed to anyway.

Opting for traditional yukata so it was easier to feed her child. Her child, smiling to herself. Kai sat next to Sesshoumaru in the sitting area, he held Takeo as he slept. She had a feeling he hadn't put him down since he was born, taking him right after she disappeared for a bath. His eyes glimmered with happiness, he didn't have to say anything for her to know how he felt.

"Drink all of the milk." Still not used to drinking fresh milk, so fresh it was warm. Anything for her son, she needed the calcium. Drinking all of it first before digging into the much needed food.

"I miss cold milk." Looking over her choices, seeing red meat and not much else packed with iron. "I need dark leafy greens for iron and calcium. Strawberries have to stay, they're my favorite and have more vitamin C than oranges. Otherwise everything looks great. Need to cut back on tea though. The caffeine in it can deplete my milk supply."

"Whatever you need will be provided." Kissing him, going back to eating trying to as fast as she could knowing she was too clumsy to eat and hold her baby.

"You are a wonderful provider." Seeing a spirit of a man appear before her. "Nope. I just had a baby I am not going anywhere."

"I apologize, I had not realized." In his life he always had poor timing, apparently even in death he did.

"Come back in a week and I will help you. I need time before I can go anywhere." She would never turn anyone away when she could help them, however she needed to delay.

"I will come back in two months. Congratulations on your new child." A very reasonable being, she would enjoy helping him. Nodding towards him as he left.

"He will be back in two months. I'll take him now, if you don't mind." Handing the still sleeping white haired child over to her, she was torn of wanting him to wake up to see his eyes and wanting him to sleep.

"Think about not going until Takeo is a year old and can be left with someone." It only made sense he would wind up being even more protective, which she wasn't sure was possible.

"I can't stop what I'm doing just because I'm a new mom. I still have responsibilities. I understand what you're saying though. It will be a challenge when the time comes." Not wanting to understand her feeling of duty and honor, willing to do anything to make her happy.

"I will send for the older pups tomorrow." Taking his change of the subject as 'I reluctantly agree, don't push your luck.' smiling as she thought about seeing them all together.

"I'd like that." Their brunch like meal, given the time of day, seemed to a busy time. Botan came inside to check in on her and the baby.

"Glad to see you awake. Your mate was very insistent I let you sleep. How are you feeling?" Sitting next to her, setting down his basket of supplies. 

"Really tender in my woman bits, cramping badly too. Otherwise, great." Looking through the items he brought, pulling out a good sized jar and placing it on the table.

"Put this on your 'woman bits'." Chuckling at the new name she gave her privates. "It will numb the area, as much as it can at least. Has your milk come in yet?"

"I don't think it has." Knowing it could take a few days for it to, she wasn't worried.

"Give it time and keep letting him suckle. Let's see him." Handing him over, he woke staring up at someone new, he began to cry.

"It's okay little one. I'm Botan. Let's see your color and your belly button." He quieted down still somewhat whimpering while Botan looked him over. "Perfect. Are there any concerns?" 

"Nothing I can think of. Wait, I was wondering why isn't he hanyou? Not that I'm complaining, I love him the way he is." Wrapping the baby back up, thinking of how to tell her what he had found, handing him back to her.

"I have found one other case in the birth records like this..." Sesshoumaru was just as surprised as she was, there had been another born like their son was. "It was almost nine hundred years ago. Born to a daiyoukai and hanyou. Are you sure you are human?"

"Pretty sure. I don't know who my parents were but I don't have any abilities, I look human too." It was not possible, there was no way she could have gone through her life without knowing.

"You have enhanced smell, hearing and taste now. Pregnancy changes a body drastically but not like this. I suspect you are a hanyou with your enhanced senses unlocked from pregnancy." Kai laughed, it didn't make any sense to her. There was absolutely no way.

"No, I'm human. I age, I'm not strong at all, clumsy, zero youkai abilities. Human." Sesshoumaru had it click in his head, she was a hanyou.

"There has never been a human Miko of Souls nor one to master the Daku sword. One may be understandable, two is not." So now he had gone insane with Botan on this weird fantasy they were in.

"You also healed much faster than you should have when you were stabbed, even with Katsuo's help. Each time it's been much faster than it should have been, as if you were healing as a hanyou would. If you were not, you would have died that day." Her mouth started to gape open, how could it not after what they were telling her.

"As well as you appear much younger than your age." Okay maybe there weren't many humans who looked ten years younger than they were. She hadn't aged physically since she graduated school, just thought it was good genes.

"I don't have any abilities though, except for what we already know. Inuyasha is strong and fast, so is Nobou. I'm not." Why was it so hard for her to accept? Did she not want to be a hanyou?

"Growing up with humans, where youkai are thought of as legends, how would you know to test yourself? Besides I believe it is tha you carried a youkai child to have unlocked your abilities. May even have been locked away by an enchantment. What is the heaviest thing you have carried?" Thinking back over her life, never having moved any furniture, having lived in her same house her whole life, that was out. Nothing she carried was ever large except once.

"A man, through the rainforest. He got bit by a snake, I carried him since it was just the two of us. He didn't seem heavy, I thought it was from the situation. We did get there in half the time it should have too." Sesshoumaru and Katsuo always did anything that they deemed too much for her, so it never came up.

"And we all know how much you hate running, nearly as much as mornings. Kai, you are a hanyou. I am unsure of what kind, I wish I could tell you. Typically with youkai, the child is whatever the father is if there is cross breeding. So that is no help here, I am sorry." Strange being told she was a hanyou. Feeling as if she finally found part of that missing piece of herself she always wondered about, disappointment from knowing she would never know more.

"That's okay. I've gone my whole life not knowing much about myself in that manner. I still don't think I care to run, even to test it out. I doubt I have it anyway. I'd like to see if I have strength though, once I'm up and about. Thank you for telling me." The last twenty four hours sure had been a whirlwind of emotions for her, hoping things were calming down.

Takeo tried to suck on his balled up fist, she guessed he was hungry and hoped her milk came in soon. Colostrum was packed full of stuff for him until then. Opening her kimono for him, giving him her breast. This was going be take some getting used to.

"I suggest more meat intake now that we know what you are, you may find yourself feeling stronger. Youkai rely on meat for our strength. Everything else is for enjoyment. Now, is there anything else I can do for you?" She would never consider herself a vegetarian, she did eat mostly fruits and rice. She needed to anyway for iron, might at was go full force with it.

"You have been wonderful, Botan." Giggling at Sesshoumaru's 'I've been telling you forever to eat more meat' face. At least she understood why now, it was their main food source.

"I will come back tomorrow afternoon to check in on the two of you. If you need me just send for me." Grabbing his basket, leaving them to theirselves again. 

"Guess you can't call me little human anymore. Not little, not human." Each watching their son eat, he caressed his hair and smiled.

"You will always be my little human. You are after all, little bit human." How on earth could he turn that around on her without so much of a glimpse to a response?

"And you'll always be my Fluffy but ya know, you're actually fluffy." Cheesy grin flashed at him waiting for his usually reply.

"I am not fluffy." Laughing, she loved him entirely even his hard headed denial. 

....

Sesshoumaru spent the entire next day with them, making sure they were well taken care of. Letting her rest as much as she could being Kai's milk came in that afternoon and she kept joking about 'porn Star boobies' which he still didn't quite understand even after she explained. 

Only leaving to send someone to collect the pups, unable to find Katsuo to do it himself. Making him wonder if he disappeared because of how he felt about his mate. She had told him everything the next morning after their ceremony. Katsuo came to apologize to him a week after, not knowing he had already spoken about it with his mate. Sesshoumaru knew it had to have been his mother pushing for him to have said anything at all. It was unlike Katsuo.

"How are you feeling?" She sat up in their bed, rubbing her eyes to wake herself up. 

"Not too bad. It's only been about two and half days, actually much better than I thought I would too. Guess more meat in my diet seems to be the way to go." Takeo still sleeping in his basket, Sesshoumaru was going over some letters in their seating area. 

"It is almost midday, something can be brought now if you cannot wait." Watching as she stood and stretched, walking to her chest and pulling out some more cotton fabric to change herself.

"That's okay, I can wait. I'm going to clean up a bit, call if you need me." Disappearing to quickly bathe and relieve herself. Kai still didn't like being gone for too long away from her new son, even just in the next room.

Hearing multiple footsteps down the hall, getting up to see who was coming. Sesshoumaru slid the doors open. It was Katsuo and the two older pups walking towards their room. Motioning them to stay quiet as he let them inside. 

Taking her some clothing to change into she was surprised to see him walk in. If not startled at the thought of their tiny baby all alone in the next room. "Everything okay?"

"Come." Helping her dress, her skin was just as smooth as it always was. Taking her hand in his, leading her out to see see everyone waiting for her.

"You're all here. Oh wow, Katsuo. Thank you." Hugging him, feeling as if she could never repay him for being so kind as to go immediately for them. 

After many hugs to Rin and Nobou, she brought out Takeo for them to meet. "This is Takeo."

"Mama. He's full Inu." Apparently Katsuo gave zero details to them. 

"Botan believes I am hanyou. One other was born like him to a daiyoukai and hanyou producing a full." Katsuo and Nobou only nodded as if it made perfect sense. Leaving Rin with a very confused face.

"I am the only human again." Taking the little one offered to her, looking down at his cute little face. 

"That's alright, it just makes you that much more special in our pack. Since I was raised human and look human, I'll most likely see myself as human still." Easing Rin's discomfort of having lost something they bonded over.

"He is absolutely adorable. Wow, I have a baby brother." Quickly becoming more elated the more she looked at him. Sensing someone new, he opened his eyes, grasping his fur as if it was a little blanket.

Nobou came over, petting his hair. "Looks just like his father. Guess that's not too bad." Taking him from Rin to get a better look.

Dark golden met dark violet, two brothers forming a bond that could never be broken. Something he had wanted his entire life.

"You sure do look like your father. He is a handsome man, little fluffy. You'll certainly have your pick of women." Feeling his arm slapped, seeing pursed lips with blue eyes staring at his green ones, only smiling at her. "Does that mean if you had a child with anyone but him, he would have been hanyou?"

"I hadn't thought about it but I think so." If she was with another youkai, she would have never known about herself, Takeo in her time would have had a lot of questions. Fate sure did like to tie up things perfectly lately.

Enjoying the evening together, she was beyond happy, thankful for everything. Thankful for her chance at this life.

....

"I feel like a cow. Just being milked whenever needed." Only three weeks into this whole breast feeding thing, finally starting to get the hang of it.

"What does it feel like?" She knew Rin would ask eventually so she had been trying to think of an answer but nothing really seemed to fit.

"It's hard to describe. They get sore waiting for him to take the milk, then it's relief when he does." Just something she had to experience for herself to find out. Nobou came in with Sesshoumaru following shortly after him.

"You look all sweaty, he give you a good workout?" Of course her mate didn't look a single hair out of place, she never could figure that out.

"Yes. I'm thinking about joining the army next may, after I turn sixteen." If he ever thought she had been at her most angry, he was wrong. Gold versus blue, it was a look he has never seen from her before. Watching her take a deep breath, close her eyes and return to look at her son.

"You are a wonderful artist, you should do that for a profession. It's much safer." Truly she wanted to just say 'no' a thousand and two times but that didn't seem to have the same eloquence.

"Mama, it will do me some good. I need to have a stable income if I wish to make my own pack. This will give me that." Her head was spinning, a family, the army. What the holy hell was going on?

Clumsily standing up with her baby still feeding, quietly leaving them to eat their meal without her. Coming to the realization her oldest was nearly a 'man' and choosing a dangerous profession. 

More dangerous because of her. Miyoko did not take being rejected very well and was testing the boundaries between their lands. It wasn't too much longer before war was going to break out if she didn't knock it off. 

Leaving in her mind, if war did come, if he was taken from her... it would be every bit her fault. She couldn't find blame in herself, as hard as Kai tried to, for Takeo's death. This very well would be.

Sinking down on her bedding, switching breasts for her little one to eat, staring in silence. Footsteps paused at the doorway. "It's your room too, just come inside." 

"You are angry." Sitting next to her, touching the soft silvery white hair of their son. 

"Of course I am. Anything but the army. I don't want him doing dangerous things. Let's not forget just last week you were telling me we may go to war with the southern lands. How am I supposed to protect him?" There wasn't an answer he could give her to satisfy her need to keep Nobou safe from the world.

"You cannot always protect Nobou. He will make his own choices in life." Kai wasn't about to accept any of her son's choices if it potentially led to his death. 

"No. He will not join. Say it's full or something, maybe I need to find Katsuo. Isn't he the one or is it Makio who accepts?" Takeo pulling off and yawning, she brought him to her shoulder and began to pat his back.

"You wish for me to deny him." Did he really even have to ask? It was irritating that he would even care to think it was alright for her son to go galavanting off to war.

"Give him a job around here, a nice safe and quiet one. It'll give him the stability he wants and me peace of mind." A little squeaky burp in her ear, she brought him down to rock him asleep. If she was lucky, she would have a solid four hours until he was hungry again. 

"I cannot. Nobou needs to find his own way, it cannot be handed to him for him to succeed." Imagining different ways she could strangle him with his own stupidly gorgeous hair, at least then he would stop saying ridiculous shit.

"That's fine. I have about six months to either change his mind, yours or Katsuo's. One of you will bend to me." Highly doubting it would be Sesshoumaru, he was too strong to ever bend to her. Guessing it would be Katsuo who would ultimately do what she wanted.

"In time you will see I am correct in this." Still so young, how could a sixteen year old be considered old enough? Knowing she would never see it as right.

"I don't think I will. He is far too young and I'm terrified of losing him. Especially if it will be my fault." Last bit of words slipping out without her permission, he was her weakness. Things always slipped out when she tried to keep them hidden from him.

"It is not your fault for the actions of Miyoko." Always Kai seemed to carry the lives of others on her shoulders, it wasn't just about her son. It was about all the sons that could be lost if war broke. 

"How can you believe that? If you had chosen her, it wouldn't be anything even thought of. Everything I touch turns to a mess." Looking down at her little one, hoping she didn't turn his life into a mess by just being his mother.

"The world is chaotic. You bring light where there is none, hope where all has been lost, happiness to the forgotten. Do not doubt your worth because of this." Holding her cheek to make her look at him, making sure she knew it was true words he spoke.

Kissing him with a tenderness only brought on by love, the electricity she felt as their lips touched was something she would never grow tired of feeling. Torn between wanting to tear his clothes off and not because of their infant son.

He always slept more peacefully in his basket, it wouldn't be too weird if they messed around a bit with him in the same room. Breaking away to move the sleeping pup, making sure he was thoroughly tucked in. Turning back wishing he didn't have that adorable smirk on his face knowing what she wanted.

It was hard for her to make a move, strangely she felt like an awkward virgin all over again. Of course Kagome and Sango each said something similar had happened to them but really, come on. It sounded just as bizarre as it felt. Biting her lower lip, her heart felt nearly in her throat. Even more so as she watched him move the basket ever so gracefully across the room, he must have felt the same way.

Taking off his top and obi before rejoining her in their bed. How she could look so innocent was beyond him, lip being attacked by her pearly whites. Laying atop of his mate, kissing her. 

Arms wrapping around his neck underneath his hair. Kai made his blood feel as though it was on fire, every bit of him that she touched. Undoing her kimono feeling inside for her supple breasts, moisture coming from them. She pushed on his chest breaking their kiss.

"I'm making a mess everywhere. I constantly leak with any amount of heat." Annoyance with a flash of embarrassment in her eyes. Covering them with the cotton cloth she had inside her kimono again. 

"It is nourishment for our son." Pulling her arms away, holding them down with one hand so she couldn't repeat her actions. "Do not hide from me."

Removing any fabric in his way, licking it all away. Feeling her pulse quicken under his palm, teasing her neck with his fangs pulling a soft moan from her lips.

Sliding his hand between them to feel her warmth growing wetter with his actions. Rubbing on her most sensitive spot where he knew she liked, still holding her wrists.

She tensed when he slipped underneath her underwear, making him pause before slipping two fingers inside her. "You are nervous."

"Yes." Chest rising in falling as her breathing became more shallow, quicker as he pleasures her.

"I will be gentle." Releasing her, sitting back to remove any clothing between them. It had been far too long for them. Slipping between her legs as he returned himself to her.

Rubbing his cock on her warmth, long silly legs wrapping around hips. Delicate hands running across his arms up to his neck, pulling him to kiss her. Breaking away to whisper in his pointed ear. "Take me, my mate."

Using great control to slowly slide into her, her gasp was nearly to much for him to keep a slow pace. Gentle as he could, feeling nearly tortured by the slow pleasure he was taking from her.

Arcing her back, pushing him deeper, breast smashed against his chest. She wanted more from him, pressing her calves into the back of his thighs to make him pick up the pace. Nipping her neck, smirking at her, there was his mate.

Sliding his hand underneath her ass, pressing her further against him as he continued to plunge into her. Small short gasps, he knew she was almost there. The way she dug her nails into his back when she released, made him feel even further pushed to his own. He had caused every bit her pleasure, only him. Capturing her lips as he filled her with everything he had, trying to let her know how much he loved her.


	27. Will it ever end?

Chapter 27: will it ever end?

 

Laying in his arms, everything felt right again. It didn’t change how she felt about Nobou joining the army but made it less prominent in her mind for the time being.

“I love you.” Leaning up to kiss under his jaw, “Think if we stay quiet we can stay like this forever?”

Rumbling in his chest suggested otherwise as he chuckled at her musings. “Doubtful. He is already awake.”

Looking over to see big golden eyes looking at them, making her hope he didn’t just see all of that. “Alright, Takeo. Mama’s coming. If you grab him and meet me in the bathhouse we can all get a bath before bed.” 

Seeing his naked form go to retrieve their child, oh how she wished he had slept longer. That man was always going to make her hot and bothered. Retreating to go get cleaned up a bit before getting in the hot water, as she stood pain etched through her brain. 

Kai grabbed her head with both hands as she crouched on the floor. With Takeo on his shoulder, Sesshoumaru came beside her to see what had happened. “What is wrong?”

“My head. It hurts so badly. It’s okay, it’ll be over soon.” As quickly as it has come it was gone again, leaving her feeling drained like it always did.

“You have had this happen before.” Right, it was a little thing she was leaving out from their daily talks. She just didn’t want him to worry and it never seemed to last long. Not like they could do an MRI here anyway.

“It started after I had Takeo.” Muttering more to herself than answering him. “Really I am just fine, don’t worry about me.” Seeing him rub two clawed fingers across his forehead, she knew she was in a lot of trouble.

“You do not keep things from me, Kai. Your health is important. You will see Botan in the morning about this.” He hadn’t used that tone with her in such a long time, he was very serious and if needed would drag her there.

“I’m sorry. I just... we’ve been through a lot already and I just want things to be normal. I am so much trouble all the time, I don’t want you to regret catching me.” Relieved to finally have said it, something that was always far in the back of her mind.

“I will never regret it. Now come, I believe you promised a bath to us.” Taking her hand to lead her away, he didn’t like her keeping things from him. Even the things he may not like to hear.

Not able to fault her for feeling the way she did, pregnancy and shortly after often left a woman feeling insecure and with their relationship new it wasn’t a wonder. Not taking it personally she had those thoughts, making note to tell her how he felt more often to burn those insecurities.

....

“Really going to walk me all the way there? Don’t you have lordly things to do?” Finishing feeding their pup before leaving to go see Botan as she promised.

“I will care for Takeo so he can look you over carefully without distraction.” And to make sure she actually went where she was supposed to and brought up why she was there. 

“Fine, fine, Lord Fluffy.” Handing him their son, wandering off miffed at him for being all sweet and concerned about her. Smiling because he was.

Arriving, she slid the doors open to find him sorting his herbs like he seemed to do every morning. “What brings you all here this morning? Takeo Alright?”

“Yes he’s doing great. We’re here because Fluffy worries too much.” Plopping herself down on the futon looking apathetic to even have come.

“Little human.” Crossing her arms with a little huff, she didn’t want to be here at all.

“I’m having these pains in my head. Ever since the day after I gave birth. It’s not really a big deal.” That woman was the most stubborn creature he had ever come in contact with.

“How often and what is the pain like?” Feeling her for a fever, looking for any rashes on her exposed skin. 

“The first was that night. The next a few days later, now it’s one or two times a day. It’s like a burning.” Not having to look up to see a very furious mate looking down at her.

“The day after? Before or after I told you about what you are?” This was not good at all, he had been so wrong about what was going on.

“After, why? Do you know what’s wrong?” The alarm in his eyes were telling enough. Whatever it was, it looked bad for her.

“I was wrong. You are a hanyou, yes. However, it seems your hanyou side was sealed away with an enchantment. They started to leak through during your pregnancy with a youkai infant.” So far there wasn’t anything new other than it being final it was an enchantment. “I believe you were never to find out about yourself. Now that you have, your youkai is fighting to be released against it.”

“What’s that mean for me? I don’t understand.” Placing her head in her hands feeling the pain again as if it knew what they were talking about. 

“Either it will break through or will need the enchantment removed before something happens. Though, it’s powerful. I’ve never seen anything like it before. It was only a guess.” Feeling someone rub her back, unsure who it even was. Everything felt out of control.

“Kami, it hurts.” Ready for it to be over. “How do we remove it?” As if speaking the magical words it wanted to hear, the pain was gone.

“Dark miko.” It was Sesshoumaru who was touching her, trying to give any comfort. “I will make arrangements to have one found.”

“My father knew, didn’t he? Even if I looked like a human child he had to have known eventually. My whole life is a lie, isn’t it?” Spiraling down fast into a dark abyss as she thought back to everything that could have given any clue to him knowing.

“One of your parents must have known to have the enchantment put on. Possibly even infertility added against human men.” Completely losing it, she ran as fast as she could which was barely faster than a human. Tears streaming down her face back to their room. 

Trying to catch her breath as her world shattered around her. They loved her, over and over told her she was perfect the way she was and they changed her. Kept an entire half of herself away from her. 

Son placed in her lap, she stared down at his sleeping form. She couldn’t imagine ever doing something like that to him. He really was perfect the way he was. “I don’t understand why they never told me.”

“I cannot give you that answer. If they had told you, you may have never married Takeo. I may never have met you. So to me I do not care why they did it, I only care to reverse it.” Even he saw how cruel it was that she needed to have tried to end her life for them to meet. So many things he could easily understand, that was never one of them. 

“I’m so overwhelmed with all of it, never doubt that I am happy to be here though. I don’t really know how to take all of this.” Smoothing her child’s hair as her tears began to fade away. Leave it to her mate to make things seem so much better.

“Do not let it taint the memories of your parents. They may have had a good intention in doing this, whatever it was.” Making her remember the love the held for her, unable to stand to see her tears.

“I know you’re right, I’m just not ready to accept it. I’m too angry with them. What do we do now? I have so many questions about myself.” Kissing her temple as he held her, resilient as ever. Nothing would ever stop her.

“Summon the dark miko, have the enchantment removed. What questions do you have?” Wiping away any trace of her tears, seeing she was going to be alright.

“Will i still be me after? What if I’m different, so much so I’m not who you fell in love with? Will I have new super powers? Will we find out what kind I am? Should I be scared of the youkai inside me?” Rambling as she fell into curiosity instead of self pity, shut up by him kissing her.

“I will always love you.” Touching the little fluffy tail their son held, “the pups will too. I doubt anything could make you any less of yourself. Inuyasha is an ass as a hanyou and one as a human, I do not have many answers for you. We will find them together.” 

“Thank you. How long do you think it’ll be to find one or will it break through before we find one?” What would happen if it did? 

“They are secretive, it will be difficult to find one. In the meantime I will find Totosai to have him make something to seal your blood. It will prevent you changing.” It wasn’t even a thought she had until then, changing.

“Am I a danger to him? To the others?” There was so much to think about, maybe she should leave until everything was settled.

“I do not believe so. They are your pups, you would be more to protect them than harm them.” Making very sure to use the word harm instead of kill, it could easily send her over the edge again.

“I’m scared, Sesshoumaru.” He knew she was and not for herself, for anyone who she may hurt. Holding her knowing there wasn’t anything he could do other than that in the moment.

....

It wasn’t long for the change to happen, it only took four days with the pain growing each time. Coming faster each time.

Eyes pure black like when she went into soul judgement, pressed into the corner of the room, growling. It was strange seeing her with fangs, dark purple markings matching their son’s with one stripe on each side added. 

Totosai was on his way being brought by Katsuo as quickly as possible. Rin took Takeo while Nobou looked after them as Sesshoumaru went inside to capture his mate like a wild animal.

Claws dug deep into the wall, she seemed more afraid than anything. Hair lavender opalescent, catching light with every sharp movement. Taking her into his arms, bearing the pain easily as she held onto him with her claws after he prayed them from the walls.

Skin luminescent like a pearl, her ears had a rainbowed effect added to the now finlike shell. Wondering how she would take learning even her looks changed when it broke through. 

Sinking down to the floor as he held her between his legs, holding tighter as she thrashed every so often against him. Taking hours for her to finally look up at him with her now bright violet eyes, the same color when the orb called her. The entire time her youkai has been bleeding through.

“Sesshoumaru? What happened? I remember you binging me Takeo to feed him.” Scent of blood in the air, her mate’s making her struggle against the rage again not realizing her claws dig deep into his lower back.

“You changed. The pups are alright, unharmed.” Making no move to let her go, he wasn’t sure how long she would go without changing again.

“I hurt you, didn’t I?” Moving her hands, she had to unstick herself from his flesh to do so. Bringing them forward to see bloodied claws instead of nails, shiny skin. She was horrified at herself, trying to push away from him. “Let me go, I’m dangerous. Please let me go.” 

“No. I am daiyoukai, I can overpower you.” Something in her snapping again, lengthening claws and fangs, black eyes. She bit his arm to make him let go, only making him tighten his grip.

“I have Totosai out here. We are coming in.” Katsuo brought in the fire youkai to see what made the pups so afraid. She looked feral.

“Let me see what we have here.” Lifting up her chin with his long hammer as she snarled at him with her bloodied face. Simply bopping her hard on top of the head, knocking her out cold.

After lying her down gently on the bedding, Sesshoumaru grabbed the old man by the throat. “Never touch my mate like that again, old man.” 

“Well how else am I supposed to get a look at what she is?” Letting him go, still angry with him. “She looks fine to me. What seems to be the problem?” 

“That’s because you knocked her out. She’s changed and needs something to seal her blood.” Completely done with spending anymore time with him, tempted to just leave them to be.

“Oh, she’s a hanyou. Why didn’t you say so before? Would have been easier if you didn’t knock her out though.” Katsuo bit his lip hard to keep from playing into whatever old man games he was playing. 

Kneeling down beside her to identify what kind she was to make the right item for her, pulling on her ear first. Opening an eye, running his hand through her hair and inspecting her hands. “I think she’s a hanyou. Any idea what kind?”

“Mizu ryū. I swear if you keep acting like a loon I’m going to kick your ass.” Sesshoumaru stayed by her side, not caring to engage him, he knew too well how he was. The very reason he didn’t not go himself.

“Testy are we? I’ll have something made in about a day.” That was not going to work for either male, each growling at the old one. “Okay fine, if you have the materials I request then it’ll be a few hours. I will need a fang from you. A ryū scale would be needed too for it to hold since you are not blood.”

“Will Naru’s work? Nevermind, I know where to get one. She must have some sort of luck.” Leaving them to go grab what was needed from his mother’s intended.

“Now open wide.” Not about to let dirty fingers or anything from him go into his mouth, Sesshoumaru reached inside his mouth and pulled one of his fangs.

“What is that horrid smell?” Opening her eyes wondering what was going on, not remembering anything that had happened earlier. Starting to sit up only to be knocked out again by Totosai.

“You will stop doing that.” Taking everything in him not to reach across her and strangle him. He was unfortunately needed to help her.

“Stop doing what?” It seemed as if it took a lifetime for Katsuo to return with what was needed, he didn’t ask where or who it was from. It wasn’t the time for questions that could be asked later.

Staying with her as Katsuo took him outside to make what was needed for her. Giving him a headache having to sit there with the old man to keep him on track with what he was doing. Though once he started he was extremely focused on making the item for her.

“We have a problem.” Nobou slowly entered the room unknowing what state his mother was in. “Takeo is hungry. Do I bring him in?”

“Bring him. She is sleeping now.” Staying close to her in case she awoke again.

“Is she going to be okay?” Looking over her, seeing how drastically her appearance had changed. Hoping it was the only thing that had changed about her.

“Yes.” Seeing her stir, wanting nothing more than to see her in her right mind. “Go and bring him.”

“My head hurts.” Sitting up rubbing the top of her head where the pain seemed to be the most. Seeing lavender opalescent hair instead of her own. “What the holy hell?”

“Your appearance has changed.” Her son bringing in her her little one, she backed herself into the corner of the room.

“No, I’m dangerous. Stay away from me.” Sesshoumaru took him from Nobou, bringing him over to her closer. “Why aren’t you listening to me?”

“Your pup needs nourishment only his mother can give.” Waiting for her to unfold herself from the tight ball she curled into.

“Knock me out. Drug me or something. I don’t care, I need you to do it.” Refusing to let him uncurl her until he did what she requested.

“No. You will feed our pup.” Grabbing her arm more roughly than he wanted to, placing him in her arms.

Trembling as she crossed her legs to hold him closer to her, so afraid of hurting him. Seeing bloody claws as she smoothed his hair, knowing by the scent she hurt Sesshoumaru. He undid her kimono for her, helping her seeing she was in shock over everything.

She felt calmer holding her child, as if everything seemed to stand still. “Will you bring me a wash cloth? I would like to clean myself.” 

Nobou still watching on as everything unfolded, went to retrieve one in the next room for her. Bringing it back as swiftly as he could. Sesshoumaru took it and began to clean her face first before helping her with her hands. 

“I’m so sorry I hurt you.” Watching as he handed back the wash cloth, bringing them both into his arms.

“It does not hurt. Do not blame yourself.” She leaned back into him, taking comfort from his touch. 

“I don’t know how you can say that. It’s a part of me, it is me. When will Katsuo be here with Totosai?” Anxious to be done with all of this, she had hoped with him leaving right away he would have been back by now.

“He is here. It will not be much longer.” Looking up at her elder son, the look on his face as he stared down at her made her wonder how much she had changed.

“How bad is it? My looks.” Sitting in front of her, placing his hand on her knee. She was still his mama, it was reassuring.

“Beautiful, enchanting.” Snorting, of all things her boy could have said. His eyes let her know he knew exactly what he was saying.

“Spending too much time with prince ass. I love you, sweetie.” Taking his hand and kissing it, a substitute for a kiss on the cheek.

“Did I hear my name?” Coming inside the open doors wearing a big smile at finally being rid of the annoyance in his life. “Good to see you looking better.”

“Do you have it?” Pulling out a silver cuff, about an inch wide, he handed it to Sesshoumaru in response. 

“I had some say in the way it looked.” Slipping it on her left wrist for her, looking at it more closely. It simply had ‘loved’ written in kanji on it with a ruby set on each side of it.

“I really am, aren’t I? What about you, how do you think I look? I know Fluffy will just tell me something like I look as beautiful as I always do.” As he sat next to her son, she began to laugh. “So many boys, Rin and I are outnumbered.” 

“Enchanting.” Surrounded by asses, it wasn’t anything in the world she would trade though. Seeing Rin with Kuma in her arms coming in, seems everyone was worried about her. 

Yawning, exhausted from everything, closing her mouth her fang but her lip. “Owe. Do I have fangs?” Hearing the laughter Incase her in warmth as it came from the ones she cared for the most.

Her life may have been a string of lies and hardships but it’s what got her here. It made everything she had gained that much sweeter and more dear to her.


End file.
